Jealous Alpha

by Jordan Silver

  “Don’t go there, don’t fucking go there. One has nothing to do with the other.”

  “Let go.” I stared into her eyes as she clawed at my hand and only when I saw the tears in her eyes did I come to my senses and release her.

  I sat back in the seat and looked out the tinted window trying to calm down. I watched out the side of my eye as a tear fell down her cheek.

  “Come ‘ere.” I pulled her across the seat and onto my lap. She tried fighting me of course. “Stop crying come on.” I wiped her face with my fingers and kissed her cheek.

  She wasn’t talking and her body was stiff as a board. I wrapped my arms around her so she wouldn’t get away from me and whispered in her ear.

  “I know you’re mad but I still want to know. Are you still in love with him?” I held my breath painfully as I awaited her answer.

  “What do you want me to say? I don’t understand why you’re acting like this, like you have the right to say anything about my life.”

  “Because I do damn you. I told you not to play games with me. I know you know how I feel about you, I see it in your eyes every time I look at you; you know. Now answer my question.”

  She folded her arms, which seemed to be her favorite defiant pose. “I don’t have to answer to you.” I’m going to wring her fucking neck.

  “I’ll take that as a yes. You’re gonna have to rethink some shit because I’m not sharing you with him.” I felt pressure in my head and chest and wanted to scream.

  “What are you talking about; have you lost your mind?”

  “Maybe, but since you want to play like you don’t know let me spell it out for you. I want you, I’m going to have you, but I’ll be damned if you’re going to have another man on your mind while I’m fucking you.”

  I flung her off my lap and she straightened up and reached for the door handle. “Get your hand away from there and don’t make me madder than I already am. The damn car’s moving through traffic where the fuck are you going?”

  When she still didn’t move her hand quick enough I pulled it away and kept it in mine. “Stop fighting, you won’t win.” I held her hand tighter as she ignored me for the last ten minutes of the ride back to the hospital.

  Once Stanley let us out she tried making a run for it but I caught up to her easily enough and took her hand again. “Don’t make a scene think about Amber.”

  That stopped her futile struggling and I led her into the building and up in the elevator. She pulled her happy mask on before we cleared the door where Gavin was sitting on the chair reading to Amber who was dressed and ready.

  “Get the bags Gavin.” There wasn’t much to get, just an overnight bag with her stuff since her mom and I had already taken her loot to their apartment.

  I picked her up from the bed and she wrapped her arms around my neck. Gia gave me the stink eye because she knew there was no way to escape me now.

  Gavin who had no idea what was going on followed us out of the room and down to the car. I placed Amber in the middle of the seat before getting in while Stanley seated her mother.

  She put on a good act all the way home for her daughter who was excited to be driving in a chauffeur driven car and was full of questions.

  I answered her questions while keeping my eye on her mother who refused to look at me. “I might be a minute.” I warned Stanley after lifting the baby in my arms while her mom grabbed her bag.

  She looked like she wanted to say something after she unlocked the outer door but I just raised my brow at her before looking at Amber in a silent warning for her to behave.

  We walked up three flights of stairs and I wondered how she was going to deal with this shit and for how long.

  “How long has the elevator been out?”

  “A couple of weeks I guess.”

  “What about the landlord, has anyone contacted him about fixing it?”

  “Of course we did and he keeps telling us the same thing, soon.” She opened the door to the apartment and let us in, barely keeping herself from slamming it shut.

  She was doing a good job of hiding her anger from her daughter but she wasn’t fooling me one bit. I saw those damn pictures again and my hackles rose.

  “Which room is hers?” I followed her down the hallway to the room she’d gone into earlier. It was like stepping into another world.

  No one could doubt her love and devotion to her child after seeing this. It was like every little girl’s fantasy. A fairy wonderland.

  The rest of the apartment though neat was nowhere near as put together as this room. I put Amber down on the bed and took her shoes off.

  “You sleepy baby?”

  “Read me a story uncle Evan.” She pointed to a line of books on a shelf on the wall.

  “Which one sweetheart?” Gia was pissed and she spat fire at me with her eyes as I moved to get the book that had been chosen.

  I sat on the bed with Amber’s little head on my leg and read to her until her little chest rose and fell with the easy breathing of sleep.

  I put her head on her pillow and pulled the covers up over her before going to find her mother who’d disappeared.

  She was in the kitchen at the stove. I leaned against the doorjamb and watched her. “I know you know I’m here. Amber’s asleep you can let me have it now.”

  “Let you have what? I have nothing more to say on the subject.”

  “That’s not gonna work. What have you told Amber about him?”

  “Seriously, what is it with you? You act like my marriage was an affront to you or something. Every time you talk about him there’s this underlying thing in your voice that I just don’t get.”

  I knew she was right, but how could I explain it to her when I didn’t understand it myself? I just knew that the thought of her with someone else made me feel cheated.

  “How about we start over? I’ll try to rephrase my question and you’ll give me an honest answer and we’ll go from there.”

  “Why do I need to answer anything? This is making me very uncomfortable. I appreciate what you did for my daughter, but I don’t think it gives you the right to pry into my life.”

  “I told you not to do that, leave that shit out of it. What you’re implying is sick. Try putting yourself in my position. Wouldn’t you want to know?”

  “First, there’s no reason for you to know, it’s not like we’re in a relationship or anything like that. And second, I’m sure you’ve had relationships before, do you tell each new person everything about the last one?”

  “That’s different, I never loved any of them enough to marry them and I never trusted anyone enough to have them bear my child.”

  “Look, I’m not comfortable talking to you about this.” She tried leaving the room and I blocked her with a hand across the door.

  “Do you ever talk about it, or do you prefer to hold onto the memories and live inside your head? Because I gotta tell you, that’s not gonna work for me.”

  “I’m still not sure why you think I should care…” I pulled her into my chest and kissed her, this time I held her jaw. “If you bite me I’ll bite you back this time.”

  I held her hands together behind her back, pressing her tits into my chest as I ravished her mouth.

  When she sopped fighting me I softened the pressure of my lips on hers and teased her with my tongue. She tried keeping me out.

  “Open. I said open Giavanna.” I had to tug on her hair to get her to obey me, but once I did I drew her tongue into my mouth and rubbed my chest against hers as I pressed my growing cock between the heat of her thighs.

  “Why are you doing this?” I’d released her lips so we could both breathe.

  “I told you, I want you. I wanted you since the moment I bumped into you at the coffee shop.”

  “The fact that you turned out to be my new architect only convinced me that we were meant to meet, and the more I see you, the more I know there’s something there.”

  “My problem is with your past. Are you over it,
or are you just going through the motions? The thought of sharing you with even his memory makes me want to kill.”

  “Do you know how insane that sounds? Are you saying that I’m supposed to forget the memory of the father of my child?”

  14

  I wanted to lash out at her and tell her that he wasn’t her father because she never met him, but even as fucked up as my head was I knew that was a dick move.

  “I don’t know okay.” I didn’t tell her that I couldn’t stand the thought of her loving someone else more than me.

  That I was insanely jealous of a dead man, a man who was no longer any threat to me. Not physically anyway. But what about mentally, emotionally?

  “Look I know it sounds crazy. But your unwillingness to share anything about him only makes it worst. It’s as if you’re holding onto him. Like the two of you have this special bond that no one else can be a part of.”

  “How did you come to that conclusion when as you say I don’t even talk about him?” I took her hand and pulled her down the hallway.

  “Maybe this was my first clue.” It’s like a living monument.”

  “That’s for Amber so she doesn’t forget her dad. I don’t want to confuse her.”

  “Are you sure about that? Amber seems pretty open and accepting of me.”

  “Don’t let it go to your head, she’s like that with everyone.”

  “Have you been with someone else since he died?” I still couldn’t bring myself to call him her husband.

  She made a sound and I looked down to see my hand around her neck. I didn’t remember putting it there.

  “You want me to have a relationship with you and you’re always manhandling me?”

  “I will never hurt you. Not in that way anyway.”

  “In what way then?” I squeezed my hand around her throat before releasing her and stepping back.

  “There’s a good chance that once I get my cock in you it’s gonna hurt like hell.”

  Her eyes widened and her cheeks turned red. I rubbed my thumb along her lips. “Don’t worry princess, I promise to take my time and go slow until I fit. That is of course if you don’t make me wait too long. If that should happen I’m not making any promises.”

  “Think a lot of yourself don’t you?” She said that as if to say she wasn’t buying it.

  “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. You haven’t answered my question. Has there been anyone else?”

  This time I didn’t threaten to choke her but instead pushed the hair back from her face. She looked down, avoiding my eyes. “No!”

  “Good girl. Lock up behind me. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I stole one last smooch of her lips before heading out the door with her following behind me.

  I waited until I heard the lock turn and the chain slip into place before heading down the stairs. I wasn’t happy about leaving them here but there was nothing I could do about it for now.

  It was turning dark by the time I made it down to the car and I hated the neighborhood even more in this atmosphere.

  There were more people on the street and not the one of them looked reputable. I looked up at her window one last time before getting in and instructing Stanley to take me home.

  There was a lot I had to do before our trip. Things that I didn’t know were needed until a few days ago.

  Once in the privacy of my own home I called my go to girl, mom and asked her for some advice.

  Maybe not my smartest move at this stage in the game, but she’s the only one I trust to help with this sort of thing.

  She complimented me on being such a good boss, but from the little chuckle in her voice I knew she was sticking her nose in my shit.

  I hurried her off the phone and sat for a few minutes thinking about the move I was about to make. It was sure to ruffle Gia’s feathers, but I find it’s always best to know your enemy and I’m pretty sure from what I know of her so far, that I had no other choice.

  I ate a light dinner and made it an early night. I’d got her phone number from her file at work so I called her before hitting the sack and was just a little surprised that she actually answered.

  “How is Amber?”

  “She’s fine, she got up for a little while but then she went right back down again.”

  “Are you coming in tomorrow or do you need more time?”

  “No that’s fine, I’ve already called the sitter I should be there at my usual time.”

  “That’s fine then, I’ll see you in the morning. Sleep well, my number’s in your phone now, call me if you need me.”

  I knew she wouldn’t but I was hoping that if it was anything serious she would use her head. “Okay thanks, I will.” Liar!

  After we hung up the phone I realized that I hadn’t really shown her any softness. So far I’ve only been gruff with her, something I never am with women.

  So why is it that the one I wanted most brings out the worst in me? You’re at fault here Evan you’ve been too much in your head lately.

  Whatever, tomorrow I’ll start being nice to her, at least now she knows how I feel. I saw that damn wall as soon as I closed my eyes and that burning in my gut started up again.

  The next day I was at the office earlier than usual, but that wasn’t such a bad thing since I had a lot to catch up on after spending all those days at the hospital with her.

  I knew the minute she entered the building because I had the security screen up on my computer and had been watching the door every few minutes for her arrival.

  My heart settled down at the sight of her and I was able to relax as I watched her make her way to the elevator and then all the way up.

  Was she thinking of me I wonder? Did I stay on her mind all night like she did mine? Was I her first thought after her daughter when she opened her eyes this morning? Or was he?

  Mom chose that moment to call and I switched gears. “That’s perfect mom I’d prefer to do the interview here myself say around eleven?”

  “I’ll take care of it son. How is little Amber doing? Gavin said she was released yesterday.”

  “Yes, she’s made great improvement so far and we’re hopeful.”

  “That’s good to hear, keep me posted and of course you know if there’s anything I can help with you have only to ask.”

  Again I wasn’t sure if I should read between the lines or if she was just being concerned for an employee’s child. Whatever the case may be, I had more important things on my mind right now.

  I told myself to give her time to get settled in for the day. If I go rushing off to her office like a love sick boy it would only give the office gossips something to talk about.

  I lasted ten minutes. For once she was in her own office and not my brother’s and from the looks of things had already got back to work.

  She looked up at my entrance and color came into her cheeks. Right now it was my only sign that she was aware of me as a man. Getting her to give me any more than that was going to take time.

  It would help if you stopped acting like a damn lunatic and start treating her with the care and respect due the woman you plan to marry.

  She started to rise from her seat, “don’t get up,” I walked over to her desk and looked down at her. There were dark circles under her eyes.

  I walked around the desk and lifted her chin in my hand. “Was Amber sick during the night?” She took her face out of my hand and played around with the papers on her desk.

  “No, but I slept in her room and she was very restless.” Yet again she showed her deep love and care for the child. She’s supposed to Evan, it’s her child you idiot.

  But she’s also his. Does she go to the extreme because she’s a part of him? What the fuck goes on in your head Evan? Seriously?

  I took her chin in my hand again and turned her face to me. “You look tired, why don’t you go home, take another day.”

  “I’m fine, I have to get some stuff done before the trip. By the way, when is the new date?”

  “Don’
t worry about it right now.” I turned to leave.

  “By the way, I need you in my office at about ten after eleven. There’s someone I need you to meet.”

  “Yes sir.” I looked back at her with a smirk. “I like hearing you call me sir.”

  I looked around her office. “But this is the wrong venue. You can call me Evan.” I left her office and headed back to mine, pleased about who the fuck knows what.

  Maybe I was pleased at the fact that I hadn’t done or said anything stupid this time. I still had a smile on my face when I sat behind my desk.

  The look on her face when I made that crack about her calling me sir was priceless. I looked down at my zipper where my dick was doing a slow rise.

  Nothing new there, he’s been doing that ever since I bumped into her in that coffee shop. I shook my head and tried to concentrate on work.

  Before her nothing and no one had ever been able to distract me from my business. Now it seems she and her daughter had taken up residence in my head and were fast becoming the most important things in my life.

  15

  Mary announced my eleven o’clock appointment while I was caught up in proposals for upcoming projects.

  They’d been flying in fast and furious now that we had the award winning Ms. Gritti on staff. Good thing I’d let Gavin talk me into giving her a contract or who knows who’d be trying to scout her right out from under me?

  “Send her in.” I put work aside for now and sat back as the door opened and Mary led a middle aged woman into the room.

  I looked her over as she approached. More so than a person’s credentials I can tell a lot by their appearance, the look in their eyes.

  I relaxed once she was settled in the chair in front of me and got right down to it. The more we spoke the more sure I was that this was the right thing.

  There was a knock at the door ten minutes later and Gia walked in. She gave my guest a strange look before looking back at me as she entered the room.

  “I’m here!”