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The Scheme

Page 20

by Mia Kayla


  I knew why I wasn’t going to barge through the bathroom door and question him. It was because I didn’t want to hear the truth. In my heart, I knew what he was going to say. It would’ve been the switch in our already blurry relationship, and nothing would be the same.

  It was fear keeping me here. Fear from the past. Fear of the unknown future. Fear of falling in love again and letting myself be open to the kind of vulnerability that came with being in love.

  At times, I thought I was dauntless. But with Brian, I was just a coward.

  SIXTEEN

  BRIAN

  I’d messed up. Asking her to stay the night had been a total fuck up.

  I could sense everything changing between us, yet I couldn’t stop it, nor did I want to.

  I had my client call tomorrow morning, and I needed to bring my A-game, but the only thing that occupied my thoughts was her. This was my last meeting with Tiggins Corp, and it included their CEO. This was it, so I should’ve let her walk out the door and called her tomorrow.

  But somehow I knew I’d sleep better in my bed with her in it.

  This woman had walked into my life with a simple solution to help her get the other man. Yet, she was the ultimate solution to mine, and I didn’t even know it. My parents had been married for almost thirty years, and when I was ten, my father had told me that when he’d met my mother, he’d known she was the one. I hadn’t understood him before, but now I did.

  When they said opposites attract, wasn’t it the truth? I’d never felt an undeniable connection with anyone else, an attraction so strong there was no way I was walking away from her.

  I splashed water on my face and stared at my reflection. How the hell did I get myself into these situations? For once, why couldn’t this work in my favor?

  But as I asked myself these questions, I knew the answer. The problems weren’t mine. They were hers. Her old pains, her old insecurities, kept this hidden barrier and chains against her heart.

  I could see the torment in her eyes. I sensed the internal struggle she was going through in her actions. What she said versus how she acted was a constant battle. One minute, she was sighing into my shoulder, relaxing against my hold, and the next, she was denying me, not wanting to sleep over.

  It didn’t matter though, because I knew myself. I’d fight to banish her insecurities, be her safe haven and squash her fears.

  Before I could think any further, I rushed out of the bathroom, afraid my girl had left.

  My girl.

  I was already claiming her, and she didn’t even know it, but I couldn’t help it. My heart belonged to her now. We were forever linked.

  When I stepped out, I exhaled a low sigh of relief that Kendy hadn’t left. She was out of bed, though, and dressed in her jean shorts and red, white, and blue tank. She was crazy beautiful, just as she’d been this evening.

  My eyes traveled the length of her legs, and I had the strongest urge to drag her back to bed. Her eyes flickered to mine for a second then moved to her purse on the ground, but not before I sensed the hesitation, the fear in them.

  Almost as if she had to keep busy, she picked it up and began rummaging through her belongings. “Thanks for taking me to the fireworks.” Her voice sounded shaky. Not a good sign.

  “Kendy,” I said gently, approaching her slowly so I wouldn’t spook her.

  I reached for her waist, and then brushed her hair away from her face. I peered down at her, our eyes locking. My insides softened as I saw some of that hesitation melt away, and then I bent down to kiss her. Again she didn’t stop me. I told her with my lips how much I wanted her to stay the night. My true feelings and emotions rushed to the surface, and I savored her with such passion that she turned liquid beneath me.

  She was the first to pull back. She blinked a couple of times as confusion crossed her face, and something else. It was an emotion I was familiar with, an intense look of longing, and it gave me a tinge of hope that she felt as deeply as I did.

  I didn’t give her another chance to deny me. I cupped the side of her face. “Stay,” I whispered urgently. When she didn’t protest, hope bloomed in my chest, and I brought her closer by the nape of her neck. “Stay,” I whispered again.

  When I caressed her lips with my tongue, she didn’t open at first, but then I flicked my tongue against her. “I need you,” I told her. I didn’t give her a chance to respond.

  Tonight, I would do anything to keep her here. I didn’t want her to walk out that door, not again. We’d played this game long enough. I was done with the game, done with FTFing, or whatever the hell she thought we were still doing. I was over it, and if making love would keep her here, I’d happily oblige . . . all night long.

  There was no way I was letting her leave, not without a fight. Tonight, I wasn’t taking no for an answer, not when I knew I had fallen hopelessly in love with this woman.

  She moaned into my mouth as her hands moved, urgent and aggressive, over the front of my boxers. We broke contact just enough for her to reach for the waistband of my boxers, but I lifted her hands and brought them to my lips. Kissing her delicate fingers, I stared down at her. I wanted to savor and cherish every inch of her body. Tonight, I’d take things slow, make love to her the way she deserved.

  I cupped the back of her shorts and picked her up as she wrapped her legs around my waist. When I pushed her against my hardness, she dropped her head back, and my tongue found the tender spot below her ear that drove her mad. This was her spot, the one that got her panties wet just from one flick of my tongue.

  As many times as I’d been inside her, I’d memorized every inch of her. I knew the tender spot on the inner part of her thigh, how to make her moan and, even better, how to make her scream louder.

  If her body was a road map, I could trace every birthmark, every freckle, and every part of her body that drove her over the edge.

  Her feet touched the ground, her tender eyes locked with mine. Bending down, I lifted her behind her knees, carrying her like we were crossing some sort of threshold, and maybe we were. Maybe this was some monumental shift in our relationship. Either way, I knew there was no way she was leaving tonight because I wasn’t letting her go.

  ***

  I jolted up from my peaceful state of sleep when I heard a scream. It was Kendy. She was lying beside me, thrashing around, blonde hair matted to her face. And then she stopped.

  I leaned in, listening to her tiny mumbles to see if I could decipher something . . . anything. There was only one word I could make out.

  “No.”

  She spoke so softly. It was barely above a whisper, but she repeated that one word over and over. Her face was distorted and her eyebrows pulled together as though she was in pain.

  When she started to whimper, I moved up to my knees. It was like taking a punch in the gut over and over again, watching her struggle. But then I noticed that her cheeks were wet from tears, and any indecision on whether or not to wake her up flew out the window.

  Her tears were my undoing.

  I shook her gently. “Kendy . . . Kendy . . .” I pulled her to my chest, wiping away the wetness on her cheeks.

  Finally, her eyes flew open and she reeled back, throwing herself up against the headboard. The action was so abrupt, my eyes widened. Her limbs shook as her face flashed with fear then confusion.

  I raised my hands like I was approaching a scared animal. “It’s me. Brian.” Of course she knew it was me, but I’d just woken her from her nightmare, and she seemed disoriented.

  The next minute, she rushed toward me and started wailing into my chest.

  Listening to her cries was like tiny knives shooting straight through my heart.

  “It’s okay,” I whispered, smoothing a hand down her back. “It’s okay, baby; it’s okay. I’ve got you.” I tucked her under my chin and she curled in, unresisting.

  I didn’t know what had frightened her. All I knew was that I wanted to fucking jump back into her nightmare and beat the boogie m
an to a pulp.

  I rocked her as she cried in my lap. I’d never felt so helpless, wanting to do something, but not knowing what she had dreamt about.

  She wouldn’t talk, so I didn’t know what I could do or say. I just comforted her the best I could and rocked her within the confines of my arms as my insides contracted at her uncontrollable sobs.

  When her cries died down, she pushed at my chest, and I loosened my hold. She wiped the tears from her face with the bottom of my oversized T-shirt, that she was wearing.

  Pulling her knees under my shirt, she backed up against the headboard again. I knew in my gut what her nightmare had been about. There was no confirmation, but my gut was never wrong. Whatever this was, I was certain it had something to do with her ex-boyfriend.

  She wouldn’t even look at me, and I couldn’t take it. I inched closer, wanting to be near her. I sensed that she didn’t want me to even touch her, and I yearned to hold her again, but I kept a small distance.

  “I’m sorry,” she said sadly.

  My stomach dropped at the sorrow in her beautiful blue eyes. Why the hell she was apologizing, I had no idea. I could see exactly how broken she really was, and I knew she was embarrassed. She had let her guard down, something she’d never done with me, but I had to show her that it was okay.

  “There’s nothing to be sorry about.” I reached out to hold her, but she cowered, backing up farther.

  She nodded, barely, then hugged her knees closer to her chest and rested her chin on top. She looked so tiny in my oversized t-shirt.

  “What were you dreaming about?” I asked carefully, gritting my teeth. My muscles tensed as I waited for her response. Time seemed to tick by slowly, painfully. The seconds seemed like an eternity.

  Her eyes met mine for a brief second before she turned away again. “Cole.”

  I gritted my teeth again as my body tensed. I wanted to ask her more, but I waited for her to tell me. If I pushed her, she’d clam up. I had figured that out by now.

  Her lip quivered as she spoke. “He held me . . . he held me down the whole time. Even when I begged him to stop.” She spoke softly, though she sounded tormented.

  I gripped the sheets in my fists, my eyes losing focus. Everything made sense. No wonder she didn’t want to be on the bottom when I made love to her.

  I want to fucking kill him.

  Tremors overtook my body, but I breathed heavily and concentrated only on Kendy’s face to keep me steady. “What else?”

  She gulped, seeing how angry I was. She’d probably kept this secret all this time. “I found him in his truck with his pants down, with Clary,” she said quietly. “I told him I didn’t want to see him anymore . . . and . . .” She stifled a cry in her sleeve. “ . . . and he wanted to make sure I knew what I’d be missing.”

  My hands trembled at her revelations and, automatically, I advanced toward her, because, shit, I had to hold her. I needed to feel her beside me, but she held up her hands to stop me.

  “I was embarrassed. I didn’t think people would believe me, since we’d already been together sexually. And by the time I could absorb what had happened . . . I just wanted to forget,” she said before tucking her feet under her butt, her tone heart-wrenchingly soft. “I’m fine. I got my revenge. I busted his nose.”

  She was trying to make light of the situation, when there was nothing funny about it. If all that asshole got was a broken nose, he got off fucking easy.

  She shook her head, offering a sad smile. “Don’t feel sorry for me.”

  “I don’t.” It was the truth. Kendy was strong, no question. I didn’t feel sorry for her, but she needed to know she didn’t have to go through this alone. She had me now.

  She peered out the window, wrapping her arms around herself in a cocoon of anguish. “I haven’t had that nightmare in a while.” Her eyebrows pulled together like she was studying me, gauging my reaction maybe.

  Then I paused and somehow found myself asking, “Do I look like him?”

  She shook her head, biting her lower lip. “No, not at all.” Letting out a soft sigh, she added, “But sometimes you remind me of him.”

  Ice spread through my stomach. I didn’t want to be compared to that asshole in any way, shape, or form.

  My jaw locked right before I spoke. “I’d never hurt you, Kendy.”

  My voice came out strong with conviction. There was no way I’d fail her when every man in her life had. Her father had left her at such a young age, and the only man she had ever loved had hurt her beyond repair. I’d restore her faith in men again. I would. She’d gain trust and faith in me.

  “No, the good parts of him. The way I felt about him.” She lowered her head, her bottom lip quivering. “You remind me why I fell in love.”

  I choked down all the emotion from her words and extended my hand. “Come here.” I just needed to touch her. If not for her then for me because I was anything but fine. “It’s me,” I reassured her.

  Her eyes held a haunted, distant look in them. She glanced at my extended hand, her face filled with caution.

  “I’ve got you,” I said, coaxing her toward me. Everything had to be on her terms, not mine.

  Finally, she extended her hand and locked our fingers. I watched the light from the bathroom shine on her beautiful face.

  “Stop worrying about me,” she said. “I told you I’m fine.” She said the words, but I didn’t believe them. Her forced smile didn’t reach her eyes. It wasn’t the genuine smile I was so used to seeing.

  “Well, I need to hold you, because I’m far from fine. I’m about to hunt this bastard down and leave him with more than a broken nose.”

  She bit her lower lip, emotions rushing to the surface. Then she crawled into my lap, and I wrapped my arms around her.

  I heard her heavy exhale as she leaned into me, her whole body relaxing. Maybe she too felt steadier around me, wrapped in my embrace.

  This was good. Really good.

  I took this as a sign she was slowly trusting me, getting used to me. At least this time she wasn’t pushing me away. My chest tightened as a fierce protectiveness overtook me. As though this newfound purpose reigned throughout my veins, and it was to protect and love this woman for eternity and ensure that no one would ever hurt her.

  “I’m okay.” Her hands moved under my shirt, her fingertips trailing along my waist, the bareness of my back. “I’ll be okay.” Her words came out stronger with more force, but they weren’t directed at me. She was speaking to herself.

  Her hands turned more urgent, not as gentle, as her fingers dug into my skin, and the mood shifted. I tensed, confused at the quick change, yet wanting her all the same.

  She rested back on her heels, seduction written all over her face as she gripped the back of her shirt and lifted it over her head. Her perfect nipples pebbled against the soft bathroom light, which was shining into my room.

  She positioned herself over my boxers. She still had her panties on, but as soon as she sat on me, I was hard as a fucking rock. Then she gripped the tips of my hair, pulled my head back, and slammed her lips against mine, ravenously kissing me.

  Warning signs rang loudly in my ears. A moment ago, she’d been so vulnerable, and now her possessive movements seemed so erratic.

  I wanted her, too. Shit, did I ever. I always did. But it felt wrong, when moments ago she’d been crying.

  She pulled back and rubbed her tits against my chest. There was a devilish smile on her face, but I stopped, my jaw tightening. What I noticed in her eyes was what broke me. She was disconnected from this moment, the passion I was used to seeing gone and replaced by an eerie coldness.

  “I’m going to fuck you. Hard.”

  The way she said it tugged at my heart. I was beginning to realize maybe this was how she forgot. This was why she always had to be in control. It was all she knew.

  Looking up at her stark blue eyes, I wanted to tell her that I didn’t need anything else, just her. With me, in my life.

&nb
sp; But I didn’t say anything, because I had a feeling she wouldn’t believe me.

  She shoved my chest until I was lying on my back and moved her hands to the edge of my boxers. I pulled on her hands, bringing them each to my lips. Then I lifted her toward me. Our eyes met in the darkness, mine softening, trying to get her to be present with me in this moment.

  When she paused, I sensed the wall weakening, the uncertainty in her eyes lessening, and I framed her face, pulling her flush against me. “Kiss me,” I said gently, sensing I was chipping away at her hard exterior; her defenses were deteriorating.

  When her eyes lost focus at my words, I pulled her face down to mine, and our lips met. When her body tensed in my arms, she retreated and I stopped. Then suddenly, her mood changed like a switch had been flipped. Her kisses turned urgent and rough as her lips crashed against mine. It was desperate, cold even. She was forcing that wall up again, sealing me out, and I couldn’t let her do that.

  I wouldn’t let her do that.

  I framed her face to slow down and savor her mouth, outlined her lips with my tongue, and touched her lips gently with mine. I looked up at the woman who had claimed my heart, peering deeply into her eyes so she knew, so she understood. “Do you know how crazy beautiful you are? Why are you so perfect?”

  She seemed lost, pain shinning in her eyes. Her voice was barely a whisper. “It’s because you want something from me.” When it slipped out from her mouth, my heart sunk. Was sex all she thought she was worth?

  Suddenly, she looked so vulnerable that I pulled her flush against me once again. This was a side of her I’d never seen before, and I made it my mission to prove her wrong.

  “The only thing I want to do is kiss you.” I framed her face and kissed her lips. “Here.” I kissed her button nose. “And here.” I placed a small kiss on each of her eyelids as my lips feathered across her tender skin.

  She shivered as her breath caught in her throat, but she didn’t resist, her body molding to mine as I pushed us both up to a sitting position.

  “And here.” I flicked my tongue over and over against the tender skin on the side of her neck.

 

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