Zero Sum

by B. Justin Shier

  “Okay,” Ms. Curray whispered, “your story is sounding a bit more plausible now.”

  “What do you say I get you and those hostages down an elevator?”

  She looked at me skeptically.

  “You can call the cops once you get down.”

  She rolled her eyes.

  “Uh…you can call your editor?”

  “Fine. I can’t file a story if I’m stuck in a tin can, anyways. But how are you going to manage that?”

  “A diversion, of course. Just sit tight, okay?”

  She nodded.

  There were two men armed with snub-nosed machine guns guarding the thirty or so people left in the restaurant. I looked at the gunmen. They stood stiffly, and all their attention was focused on the hostages. So they’d been wiped too…wipes guaranteed their loyalty but cramped their initiative. I thought back to that stunt-double I created at Elliot. It was a majorly lame trick, but the gunman had been so focused on terminating his target (me) that he’d failed to consider subterfuge. I bit my thumbnail. Maybe I could exploit that same weakness now. If I became their target, they probably wouldn’t notice Rei’s movements. The only question was whether I could last long enough.

  My father and his gun-nut friends used to debate the merits of the submachine guns those guys were toting. My dad said they lacked stopping power. A single round might not even bring a man down. That’s why my father and his friends preferred something in the .40 caliber range. A .40 caliber bullet would punch a fist-sized hole in you. In comparison, submachine gun bullets were relatively weak. Fortifying my clothing could probably shield the first few rounds—but Rei would have to act fast. Submachine guns made up for their lack of power by throwing out rounds by the dozen. Given enough time, those two would shred me like Parmesan cheese.

  I peered around the corner of the bar. Rei had already maneuvered closer to the guards. Behind all the smeared mascara were two not-so-despondent eyes. I felt a tug at my core. The weft-link was calling out to me. I could sense the speeding pace of Rei’s heart, the tension rising up the length of her forearms, the need to hack and slash. She knew I was out there. She was just waiting for a sign. We were on the tip of a wave. Violence and death were tugging. The thoughtless Zen that came with them beckoned.

  I shook my head. Stupid. I reminded myself of the hostages. I needed to stay focused. Ms. Curray and I were far from the windows. We were in the darkest part of the room. The goons were minding their prisoners, their backs turned to the bar. It was the perfect time to get Rei’s attention.

  I wiggled my hand in the air.

  Rei caught the motion in an instant. She grinned through her faux tears. I didn’t even need to explain what I had planned. She just sorta knew. I had to admit that—bloodlust aside—the link was kinda cool.

  I took a deep breath. You’d think getting shot at once would toughen you up for the next time. Nope. Ignorance is bliss. This time was worse. Still, I couldn’t think of any other way. I told myself I had Rei. I told myself that I could trust her to be fast enough. And I casted an anti-kinetic fortification before my nerves got the best of me. From behind the bar, I grabbed a tray, put a bottle of seltzer on top, and snagged the bartender’s Walkman. I stuck the headphones in my ears, took a deep breath, and pumped up the volume.

  A Beetles tune blasted into my ears. I smirked. If God did exist, he had a sense of humor.

  Clearing my throat, I set off to deliver some drinks.

  “Help,” I sang, “I need somebody.”

  The guards swung towards me.

  “Help—not just anybody.”

  The first round zipped by my forehead.

  “Help—you know I need someone.”

  People started screaming.

  “Help me get my feet back on the ground.”

  The seltzer bottle exploded in my face. Fizz sprayed everywhere.

  “Rei, hurry the fuck up!” I screamed, my eyes agog.

  Two flashes of heat cut into my side. The bullets were finding their marks. My fortification took the brunt of it, but the spell was already crumbling. Abandoning my tray, I dove to the ground.

  “Rei!” I screamed.

  A slashing burn ripped below my left ear. My flesh screamed in protest. Belatedly, I recalled that the fortification only worked on my clothes—my head was fair game. All pretenses of dignity gone, I curled up into a ball and pointed my butt at my foes. I went to scream, but my chest had constricted in fear. Two more rounds thudded into my rear. All I could do was shelter my skull as the carpet around me turned to confetti. I thought I was gonna void my bladder.

  The barrage of gunfire was interrupted by two loud snaps.

  “Dieter,” Rei said, “these days you are not so self-assured. It is most disappointing.” She cocked her head and peered at my upright ass. “Then again, your abject terror does have its…perks.”

  I would have given Rei credit for her much-improved snark, but she was holding two men like rag dolls. Their heads were resting on their shoulders. My councilwoman started screaming. Rei turned to look at her.

  “Come now, Maurine. These,” she shook the limp bodies, “are evildoers.”

  The hostages were not encouraged by the mascara-smeared demon’s lecture. They scrambled away from Rei as fast as they could. Rei sighed and dropped the corpses to the ground.

  “Well, I appreciate you being around,” I said, nursing the growing welts on my keister. “Although you could have done it a few bullets sooner.”

  “Apologies, I broke a heel.”

  I looked at my watch. We were running short on time. Pressing the elevator call button, I cupped my mouth: “Anyone who doesn’t want to be in the same room as the psychopath—this way now!”

  The hostages scrambled over top of one another to reach the elevator.

  Rei gave me a brutal look before turning her attention to the guards’ possessions.

  Ms. Curray walked over to me in her soggy dress. She looked a bit pale, but was staring at Rei in fascination. She leaned over and whispered into my ear, “I can’t believe it. They do exist.”

  “And they do have feelings,” Rei grumbled. She didn’t bother looking up. She was busy counting grenades.

  Ms. Curray looked at me surprise. “How on earth did she hear me?”

  “You ain’t getting any more quotes out of me, lady. Now skedaddle. And please set off some fire alarms on your way out. We don’t want anyone left below the tower after midnight.”

  “No problem. But, Resnick, don’t you go dying on me. I expect an interview later.”

  I sighed. Ms. Curray was going to get me torched.

  “Resnick…” Ms. Curray scrunched up her nose in thought. “You’re not…undead, are you?”

  I rolled my eyes.

  She smiled. “Just wanted to make sure.” She leaned over and gave me a peck on the cheek. “Good luck, Resnick.”

  “Ma’am,” I said, blushing.

  Rei stomped her foot as the fleeing humans pushed onto the elevator. “Excuse me! What about me? I have silenced the bad men, have I not?”

  Someone coughed.

  “Hello?”

  The elevator door shut on their very wide eyes.

  “Rei, you’re just not a people person,” I said walking over to her. “And they’re gonna be wiped anyway, right?” I knelt down next to her and helped strip the ammo vest off one of the dead dudes.

  “Dieter,” she said uneasily. “Could you back away, please?”

  “Relax,” I said with a chuckle. “I’m not gonna pull a pin or anything.” I tugged at the straps. “Dang, this bandoleer is tangled. Haven’t these guys ever heard of Velcro?”

  Out of the corner of my eye I saw Rei clench her fists. I looked up at her. Her whole body was shaking.

  “Your neck,” she managed.

  A wave of prickles danced down my spine. I felt below my ear. It was soaked with blood from the gunshot.

  Rei swallowed. Her pupils had blown as wide as saucepans.

 
“Right. Sure. No problem,” I said abandoning my effort. “I’ll go clean up.”

  I hustled off to the restroom and didn’t dare look back.

  Rei didn’t wait. She bit into the first corpse as I rushed away.

  More like an incision my ass.

  +

  I washed out my wound in the sink. It was just a graze—the bullet’s friction had done a decent job of sealing it—but I made extra certain to remove all the dried blood. (No point in being a tease.) I looked up at my reflection and let out a puff of air. We had evacuated the innocents. We had gotten our proof. But one question remained: Should we go after the six initiates or just let Sadie blow the tower? Part of me wanted to bolt. What were Rei and I gonna do against a coven full of mages with mercenaries and trolls backing them up? Our job was to get our proof and get out. We were supposed to leave the rest to the ICE. We had met and exceeded our objectives, but a dying girl had begged me to storm up there and save her sister. I frowned. I didn’t even know if her sister was still alive. This wasn’t a call I could make alone. Rei and I needed to talk this over.

  She was finishing up when I arrived. Puddles of red had soaked through the carpet.

  “Feeling better?” I asked tentatively.

  She stood up and shook out her hair. When she looked at me, her eyes were grey but lazy.

  “You have no conception.”

  She wiped her mouth off on the back of her hand.

  “Cool,” I managed. Rei was a sight. Mussed up makeup and a face-full of blood. I didn’t even bother to look at her snacks. How you extracted blood out of dead men was beyond me; Rei must have gotten inventive. I walked straight past them and looked out the window. Thousands of tiny dots mingled about below. Revelers were getting warmed up for this night’s festivities down the entire length of the strip. A bout of vertigo took me, and I was forced to look away.

  “So what do we do now?” I asked.

  “Pardon?” Rei asked, covering a burp. She looked confused.

  “I mean, do we go after Carrera or just let Sadie blow the thing? I promised that girl I would find her sister—but you didn’t, Rei. I’ll understand if you want to call it a night. You did everything Albright asked. Your job is done.”

  “Have you not been listening to the radio? Sadie Thompson is not reporting in. We are all that is left.”

  “What?” I exclaimed. “My radio started screeching when the lights went out.”

  “Indeed, mine as well.” Rei pulled off one of the men’s jackets and wiped off her face. “It was rather annoying.”

  My jaw dropped. “The speaker was screaming in your ear this whole time?”

  “The noise ceased when Carrera and his men ascended above us.” She tossed the used jacket on its owner’s head and shrugged. “I have recovered.”

  “Is Ichijo okay? Is the ICE going to intervene?”

  Rei’s lips drew into taught lines. “Fukimura-san was shot in the gut. The Druid managed to stop the bleeding, but his condition remains grave. Lieutenant Dante delivered our evidence to the ICE reps. They confirmed that the ACT is indeed contraband from beyond the frame, but Monique fears they will arrive too late to avert the reaping.”

  “What the hell, I thought there was a team ready to go?”

  “The assault on the Salt Lake leynode has the international community in an uproar. There are running street battles in downtown Salt Lake. The ICE is more concerned about information control.”

  “Stars above,” I groaned.

  “Indeed.”

  I fished the radio out of my pants and stuck the device back in my ear. “Thank God,” Monique said over the comm. “We were listening to the shuffling of your pants for the past fifteen minutes.” I swallowed. Thank goodness that was all they heard. If they had heard what I told Ms. Curray…

  “Um, sorry about that. What do you want us to do, captain?”

  The question was met with silence.

  I shook my head. “Monique is freezing up again, isn’t she?”

  “I believe the captain is past that, Dieter.” Rei reloaded the two submachine guns. She went through the motions with the same fluid creepiness as my dad.

  “Did hurling plaster at Monique grant you some sort of insight?”

  Rei shrugged. “We bonded.”

  “No, you shaved her head.”

  Rei rolled her eyes. “Would you prefer we do one another’s nails while watching mind-numbing romantic comedies?” She handed me a gun. “You have thirty rounds. I’ve set the weapon to fire three rounds with every trigger pull. Aim low. The muzzle kicks upwards as the rounds fire.” She frowned. “You are holding it too far out. Nestle the stock in the pocket of your shoulder.”

  “I’ve never used one.”

  Rei looked surprised. “So Picasso’s son cannot paint…” She smiled. “Very well. If you survive, I shall give you private lessons.”

  Monique clicked in: “Dieter, Rei, I’m sorry, but I need you to get up to the observation deck and set up a translocation circle. We still can’t raise Sadie on the radio. We can’t count on her to blow the tower. An ICE assault team is en-route, but they’re cutting it tight. We have to buy time. Lambda is going to have to conduct an assault.”

  Rei mimed an I-told-you-so.

  I stuck out my tongue.

  She motioned to bite it.

  “Captain,” I asked, “did you just order us to kick ass and chew bubble gum?”

  “Hell yea, baby,” Roster replied. “I finally get to see your bitch ass in motion. Last one to five thugs has to score us some beer.”

  “Deal. We’ll radio when we are in position to set up the circle.”

  I took a deep breath. “Okay,” I said to myself. “We can do this.”

  I looked up at the ceiling.

  “Hold the phone, kumpadre. How the heck do we get through a foot of concrete?”

  Rei smiled. “Through? Dieter, you are thinking too linear. We go around it.”

  “What?”

  “Be honored. I’m going to give you a piggy-back ride.”

  I glanced out the window and put two and two together.

  “No way,” I said backing up.

  “Dieter, phobias are to be overcome. Hop on my back.”

  “You can lift both of us?”

  She crossed her arms and cocked her head.

  “I know, I know. This is the part where you say: ‘Dieter, my most misinformed compatriot, do not doubt my power. I am not some lowly catacomb cat. I am a Pure. Tremble at my potency.’”

  Rei nodded in agreement.

  Cursing the day I was born, I strapped my new death stick onto my back. “Let’s get this over with.”

  Tapping a finger against her chin, Rei nodded to herself. “Roster was correct. I do see the resemblance. However, you are a bit taller—and you have more hair—and you are still wearing shoes.”

  “Huh?”

  “My sisters and I loved the part where he ran across the broken glass.” Rei touched a finger to her lips. “And that scene in the bathroom was most—”

  “Stow the Bruce Willis fantasy session, will you? And speaking of your sister, what the hell is the Duchess of Whatever doing here anyway?”

  “Meddling.”

  I opened my mouth, but Rei gave me the don’t-you-dare-ask-me-about-internal-Bathory-affairs glare. I put my hands up. “I get it, family business and whatnot, but Rei, if Anna tears my head off, I’m holding you personally responsible.”

  The air popped, and the color drained from Rei’s eyes. “She shall not touch you.” I took a step backward. Rei’s voice was as cold as ice. “You aren’t hers.” The greed couched in her tone…This was not the girl I knew. This was an entirely different person, pleonexic to the core. But the moment passed, the tension in the air released, and her features returned to normal. “Now stop stalling,” she cooed. It was like she’d come out of a trance. “It’s piggyback time. Hop on Aunty Rei’s back.”

  +

  Rei bashed the window with a ch
air until it shattered. I watched the shards began their thirty-second journey back to planet Earth and yelped like a schoolgirl as the pressure change caused air to gust out into the night. Rei grabbed me by the collar before I could flee.

  I had every reason to run. The whole damn thing slanted outwards. Who the hell slants windows that are three-hundred-and-fifty meters above the Earth’s surface?

  “Take all the blood you want!” I pleaded.

  “Maybe later.” She patted her back. “Hop on.”

  “I want Albright to tear up that damn contract right now!”

  “My most acrophobic sidekick, you are immune to wipes. The Department would have to puddle your diminutive brain before they released you…which is equivalent to the worst outcome of this adventure.”

  I frowned. She had a point. “Did you just call me the sidekick? I’m not the sidekick. You’re the sidekick.” I jumped on her back and clung like a baby koala. “Advance, my minion.”

  “Goodness, you are fat,” she lamented.

  I had second thoughts, but before I could bolt, Rei leapt out the window and snatched hold of the window frame with a single hand. We swung out in a gut-wrenching arch. The metal groaned, but Rei’s grip held firm. I started shivering uncontrollably, but I had to admit it was amazing. We were hanging off a building, dangling from a 45-degree ledge, gust after gust was knocking into us, but Rei wasn’t even breaking a sweat.

  I frowned. I wasn’t sure if Rei could sweat.

  Hand-over-hand, she began a slow climb up the thin windowsill. Each grip change left bent metal in its wake. “Holy crap,” I muttered. I reminded myself to never declare a thumb war.

  “Do not pee on the dress, sidekick,” Rei ordered. “It is a Gar Vanderlik original.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I managed.

  We made good progress in the next five minutes. Rei was breathing hard, but her pace wasn’t slowing. The steady pace of her hands buoyed my confidence. It looked like a kersplatting wasn’t in the cards. Relieved, I started to perk up. Then I did something extraordinarily stupid: I looked down. A swirl of bright lights greeted my vision. The massive hotels glimmered like tiny models. The merrymakers milled about like ants.

  My head spun. My vision whirled. I didn’t dare say anything, but I was teetering on the edge of a full-blown panic attack. I imagined the gun dangling from my back slipping off and plummeting to the ground. I imagined the hard metal shattering into a million pieces on the asphalt below. I saw my own grip falter. Felt my own body do the same. My heart racing, I gripped Rei more tightly and buried my face in her hair. The familiar smell of lavender helped stave off the freak out.