The Pinnacle

by Gary Moreau

  “Why did you stop me from going to the ocean that day?”

  Yamaguchi’s brow wrinkled in concentration as he thought. “It’s hard to remember.”

  “I understand. Don’t worry about it.”

  “No, I must answer.” He spoke slowly, as if each word caused pain. “The ocean is bad. It would’ve killed you…and then…then I knew I had to kill you. Wheeler was inside my head. I––”

  “Wheeler? What do you mean?”

  Yamaguchi let out a long breath and shook his head. “What did you ask me?”

  “Nothing, my friend, nothing at all.”

  The strain left Yamaguchi’s face. He stood, bowed, and then strode purposefully from the room, leaving Casey alone with his only other friend, little Marta.

  Chapter 37

  The following days passed quickly for Casey as he produced cube after cube of instructions and information. He had temporarily managed to suppress his thoughts about the future and was enthusiastic when he interacted with his two students. It was pleasurable and satisfying for him to discuss the science and art of healing.

  He made occasional inspections of the cardio-respiratory devices and the regeneration tank, which now contained the floating body of Simon Weiss, making adjustments and explaining while he worked. Both Glancy and Quon were bright, learned their lessons quickly, and began developing the seeds of good judgment. Li Quon was particularly motivated, spending much of her time monitoring the regeneration tank, which bubbled around the father of her child, a child that was being cared for by guild members in the Agri-Dome. She had given up all pretense of returning to her idyllic life as an agri-tech and had begun wearing guardian white.

  Casey noticed, the last time he had visited the treatment room, that there was a pile of discarded uniforms in the rear corner and surmised Li and Padraig had not only seen their patients, but had also seen themselves. Although he still considered it impossible, he made repeated efforts to get them to generalize from their observations of the victims to the planet as a whole, but they inevitably ended up looking at him blankly. The change that had been inflicted on them, and the grip the planet had on them, was too strong to overcome.

  However, Casey could claim one other small victory; he had managed to convince Li and Padraig to insist that the new fowl and swine be sequestered inside the Bio-Dome. That small success had been enough to satisfy Slater, at least for the time being. Gradually, Casey relinquished his efforts and began to spend less time in the treatment rooms and more time sitting on his pallet in the lab.

  As Casey had predicted, Jon and Ravi had died in a matter of days, and also as predicted, there were others to take their place. He received the information with calm acceptance. He could feel the hold of the therapeutic disk weakening and he resisted the temptation of replacing it. He consciously chose to allow himself to drift away from the terrifying reality he knew to exist, choosing instead a more palatable reality that corresponded less accurately with that of the great unknowable.

  On one such day, while Casey sat cross-legged, his mind clear of thoughts, Yamaguchi entered and bowed before him. Casey had given up asking Yamaguchi to halt his inappropriate obsequiousness. He knew that regardless of what they each chose to do, it would have little impact on their ultimate destiny.

  “Teacher, I have an offering. Will you accept?” Yamaguchi waited for Casey’s response with a face that anyone other than Casey would have considered empty, but Casey had learned to detect the subtle signs of controlled emotion. He noticed a minuscule narrowing of Yamaguchi’s eyelids; he was concerned, and a small lip pressure; he was hopeful.

  “Sure, my friend,” Casey said, “any gift from you is more than acceptable.”

  Yamaguchi bent at the waist and extended a hand, holding out a photograph.

  “I see you had success with Lisa. Must have been your gift for gab.” Casey smiled as he took the photograph and began to study it. It showed a woman in the tattered remains of a yellow uniform, holding a white, tapering object in her arms. He instructed Yamaguchi to increase the intensity of the light-lines and held the picture close to his face so he could see the details better. There was a red strand extending from the object to the woman, touching her chest. He looked back up at Yamaguchi without the slightest idea of what he was being shown.

  Yamaguchi smiled his pebbly smile and with satisfaction answered Casey’s unspoken question. “It’s a baby.”

  Casey first experienced denial, and then acceptance and repugnance in rapid succession. He felt sick with yet another confirmation of the hopeless situation of his fellow humans. And such a fate! It was better that they remained ignorant and had at least a taste of happiness, even if it was based on fantasy.

  “I wonder what they are.” Casey mused. It was only a spoken thought, a question that he didn’t expect to answer. He reached down and lifted his dog onto his lap. The dog nudged her cool nose against Casey’s hand, urging him to pet her, but he only sat there, retreating and withdrawing. Then his hands began their mindless stroking of the little dog. He was not even aware that Yamaguchi had left.

  The next Casey was aware, he was trying to force his eyes to focus, as if struggling to the surface after a deep dive in cold water. Finally, he saw a face and then recognized the face as belonging to Yamaguchi.

  “I have returned,” Yamaguchi said.

  It was late in the evening, but to Casey it seemed like no time had passed, or else ages had passed, he couldn’t quite decide.

  “What is it, my friend?” Casey asked, his speech thick and indistinct.

  “I live to serve,” Yamaguchi replied.

  “A fine sentiment. What can I do for you?”

  “No, Teacher, that time has passed. Now I do for you.”

  Yamaguchi brought a small bundle into view. It was squirming with concealed movement. He pulled the covering open and shocked Casey back to full alertness. It was a baby with chubby, dimpled cheeks and long, dark lashes. The baby reached out to Casey, its pudgy fingers widely spread in appealing supplication. Marta jumped off Casey’s lap and stood straight-legged with her teeth barred, growling and barking.

  “Where did you get this?” Casey demanded.

  Yamaguchi bowed his head and lowered his eyes to the deck, which was still partially covered with stained copies of the “Gazette”.

  “Our duty is to question and observe,” Yamaguchi said in a quiet voice, including Casey in his rigid ethical framework. “Did you not wonder what the babies really were? Did you not ask? Is it not our duty to find the answer after we have asked the question?” Yamaguchi's tone turned accusatory and he seemed confused by his teacher’s response.

  Casey looked again at the pink-cheeked babe, smiling and flapping its arms with apparent joy. He tried to see beyond the appealing facade, but the mother’s expectations were too strong for him to overcome. He wondered what this world would have been like if the colonists hadn’t been young and optimistic.

  “It must be observed. It is our duty,” Yamaguchi declared.

  Casey thought about the mother, somewhere out there in the colony, frantically searching for her missing baby. Well, the harm had been done. There would be a price to pay now whether the baby was inspected or not. He was reluctant, but he was still susceptible to the expectations others placed on him, despite his protestations to the contrary. He arose and Marta stood near his feet, continuing her deep-throated growl. He didn’t rebuke the dog, but did command her to stay, before leading the way to the adjacent treatment room.

  When he entered, he saw there was a body on each of the two tables. Both of the supine figures were partially hidden from view by cardio-support devices. Casey couldn’t resist walking over to get a closer look. He recognized them both, of course, and both were male agri-techs.

  He wondered how long it would be before members from other guilds become hosts for the parasites.

  He picked up a portable surgical kit from the work counter, mentally scolding his students for sloppiness, and
walked over to the cryo-capsule they had moved into the room. He was glad that neither of his protégés was present. He doubted they would’ve been able to comprehend that the baby was not real.

  He stood for a moment with his back to Yamaguchi. He didn’t really want to hold the baby. Thoughts continued to tumble through his mind. He could always escape back to his lab and blame it all on Yamaguchi. The thought was there. He didn’t pay any serious attention to it, but was ashamed that such an idea should even occur to him and glad for the privacy of thoughts, at least among humans.

  He clicked open the capsule door and stepped in with the kit in his hand. Yamaguchi stood nearby, holding the covered cherub in his arms. Casey felt inexplicably depraved as he reached out to collect the little bundle. It was warm and full of movement, definitely alive and vigorous. He leaned back into the capsule and nodded for Yamaguchi to close the door. Then Yamaguchi walked out of the room to stand guard in the passageway.

  Casey remained still for a minute, hesitant to look upon the life form he held in his arms, knowing what he would probably see, but reluctant to witness the fact that the charming little baby had been transformed into a pale, fat worm. His stomach churned as he delicately took hold of a corner of the blanket and pulled it back. When he saw the contents, he went rigid.

  The sickly paleness and the waves of movement up its segmented body said “putrefaction and rot” to Casey’s mind. The general appearance of the beast was that of a giant maggot. He would surely have dropped the undulating ugliness if he hadn’t felt, at the same time, a horrifying curiosity about the creature.

  He could see no mouth or eyes. As he unwrapped the abomination further, a thin appendage slithered toward him. He quickly held it away and pushed back against the smooth, hard surface of the capsule, but it wasn’t far enough. He turned his head to the side and felt with disgust the cool touch of a small suction pad being attached to the skin of his chest. A thin, pulsating line of red blood traveled down the translucent appendage and into the creature’s body. Frantic, he looked through the clear crystal of the capsule into the room, but Yamaguchi was still in the corridor.

  He jerked open his kit and withdrew a laser-scalpel, spilling the rest of the kit’s contents onto the floor of the capsule. He flicked the blade on and stabbed at the body of the creature, but the blade didn’t even leave a mark. He slashed the blade across the tentacle attached to his chest and, when he severed it, instantly perceived a high-pitched cry, at the upper limits of human hearing. Perhaps it wasn’t even hearing at all. It pierced his skull like a sharp pick, causing him to wince and grind his teeth.

  The severed appendage writhed its way back into a hole in the worm’s side, but the portion still attached to Casey chest continued to pump out his blood, so that it was spurting onto the floor of capsule, making it red and slick. With the skill of a surgeon, Casey next used the scalpel on himself, neatly excising the suction cup from his chest wall. The wound continued to ooze and coated his chest with blood.

  He was overcome by rage. He stared at the creature squirming around the floor of the capsule, screeching its painful cry. He reached down with determination and pinned the beast to the floor. It wriggled and slithered, but he managed to stick the blade into the orifice through which the tentacle had disappeared. The blade entered without resistance, causing the worm to curl around the wound. Four new tentacles sprouted and searched for Casey’s hand, but he held tight. He felt the edge of the blade enter a crevice that encircled that segment of the worm and pulled the blade into the crack, enlarging it as he made a circumferential cut around the struggling beast, which was becoming increasing slippery as a thick brown substance oozed from the line of the incision. When the cut was complete, the worm split along the seam with a distinct “snap” and then lay still. The piercing screams of the creature ceased.

  Casey retched from the sight of the severed worm. He reached up with a shaky hand and opened the latch, falling out the door and onto the deck.

  While he lay there, Yamaguchi re-entered the room. He quickly rushed over to Casey, who was covered with blood, and knelt at his side, but his eyes were drawn to the contents of the capsule.

  Casey shifted his weight and looked over his shoulder; he too was stunned by the gruesome sight of a decapitated baby. It was a revolting sight. Please, he begged to himself, let the truth be as I saw it in the capsule, not as I see it now. The warmth and wetness drew his attention to the wound on his own chest. His rocking sanity began to stabilize, although his body continued to react with uncontrollable shuddering.

  He shifted his eyes to Yamaguchi, who remained as he was, his gaze fixed on the horrendous sight on the floor of the capsule. Casey knew without a doubt that what he’d just done would result in his own death, but he didn’t want his death to be at the hands of his friend.

  Yamaguchi’s muscles were visibly tensing. He appeared as if he was about to lash out.

  “Yamaguchi,” Casey gasped, “it’s not a baby. It’s a worm.”

  Yamaguchi’s face appeared stern and unforgiving but, instead of releasing himself to reach out and crush Casey, he maintained his tenuous control and stiffly reached into his pouch. He pulled out a photograph and studied it for a moment. As Casey watched with held breath, the enormous tension in Yamaguchi’s musculature eased.

  “It is as you say, Teacher,” Yamaguchi said in a flat voice.

  Exhausted by his ordeal, Casey slumped onto the deck, thankful for the discipline that allowed the giant to resist the pressure of the combined expectation of an entire colony. After resting for a moment, he pushed himself up to a squat.

  “Go away, Yamaguchi. There’ll be hell to pay. Go down to my cryo-capsule.”

  “No.” It was a response that did not invite discussion. He stood and pulled Casey to his feet. He practically carried Casey back to the lab, where he released him to collapse onto his pallet. Marta smelled the blood and stood back from Casey, barking and running back and forth in a half circle. Yamaguchi immediately turned to the portal and passed through to reenter the corridor.

  After a short while, Casey stumbled his way to the personal room and cleansed the blood from his chest, carefully leaving the blue, dermal disk in place. The coin-like wound continued to ooze. He returned to the lab and applied a coagulant gel. His gaze fell on the molecular synthesizer. He thought for a moment and then picked it up. This would be the last time he would ever use it. With a sigh, he entered a special code and a black disk was produced.

  He was suddenly so exhausted, he could barely walk. He staggered over to his pallet and collapsed onto it. After a few minutes, he gathered his strength and sat up. He lifted the edge of the bedding, put the black disk under it, and let the bedding fall into place. With one more effort, he pulled his legs up and sat cross-legged, back against the bulkhead, eyes closed, but not asleep.

  The portal “swished” open and Casey looked up. It was Yamaguchi.

  Yamaguchi first filled Marta’s food and water bowels, as was his custom, and then walked over and knelt in front of Casey, head bowed. “Teacher, I’m ashamed of my weakness, but I must return to the cryo-capsule. I’m losing the thread of true reality. I’ve hidden the worm and will return when I’m able.”

  Casey nodded. “Go, my friend. It’s your duty.”

  When the big man arose, Casey was barely aware of the movement. He had withdrawn to his private place, a place of peace. Marta jumped onto his lap and snuggled until comfortable.

  Chapter 38

  Casey awakened from his trance after an hour of mindless meditation, refreshed and at peace with his fate. It shouldn’t be long now, Casey thought, and smoothed the fur on his little puppy’s back and scratched her behind her ears. Marta settled deeper into Casey’s lap with contentment.

  The portal opened. Casey didn’t have to look. When the visitor spoke, it was the voice he expected to hear.

  “Conklin, I’m surprised to find you here. I would’ve expected you to run and hide like a yellow-belly coward.
”

  “Hello, Jack,” Casey said in a calm voice. “That’s kind of redundant, isn’t it?”

  Sabine walked over and jerked Casey’s head around, so that Casey’s face was only a few centimeters from his own. “You think you’re so smart, smarter than the rest of us, but you’re stupid. Stupid!” he yelled, and then smiled and pushed Casey roughly against the bulkhead. He backed up a couple of steps and studied Casey, looking for a reaction, looking for fear and then his gaze drifted to the wall above Casey’s pallet.

  Casey had cut out individual letters from the “Gazette” and had permanently attached them to the wall with surgical glue. The letters varied in size, like an old-fashioned ransom note. It read: “WiThouT rEaliTy ThErE is no fuTurE. Joy bEcomEs sorrow. SuccEss bEcomEs fAilurE. LifE bEcomEs dEATh.”

  “Would you like me to read it for you?” Casey asked.

  “I know how to read.”

  “Will wonders never cease?”

  “Shut up, you moron. There’s a missing baby.”

  Casey said nothing.

  Sabine hardly noticed. “Don’t deny it. I know you took the baby. I know you caused the death aboard the Pinnacle, the computer memory wipe, all of it.”

  Casey remained as he was.

  “So, you don’t deny it,” Sabine declared with satisfaction.

  The warmth of Casey’s serenity cooled. A chill spread out from his stomach and traveled down his arms and legs. He had no doubt that this was the end of his life. His memory cut loose and began to wander, back to Earth, to his time as a youth at the Stanford-San Jose Bubble and of his mentor, Doctor Marta, and then on to Copper Mountain and Britty, especially Britty. The memories clutched at his heart; of his entire life, these memories were what he valued most.

  Sabine continued to drone on in the background of Casey’s consciousness. “You have no idea how I’ve longed for this moment. You’ve been a poison in our midst. I’m going to cleanse us and there will be no reprisal, only praise. You will not get a last minute reprieve. Commander Slater knows I’m here. In fact, I’m sure he’s listening at this very minute." Sabine barked out a coarse, unpleasant sound that for him was a laugh.