Angel of Ash

by Law, Josephine

  Angel nodded. “Dreadfully, so,” she began as Hunter patted a space on the edge of her bed for Angel to sit, close to her and the baby.

  Angel accommodated her, settling her skirts around her and smiling at the little cherub of baby lying so peacefully upon his mother’s lap. “When did he fall asleep?” She asked, caressing his silken black curls lightly and smiling.

  “Less than an hour ago, I believe, I have been sitting here watching him and wandering how anything so beautiful could possibly come from me,” she said.

  “Oh, Hunter, how you misjudge yourself, your child is beautiful because you are beautiful, on the inside and out, he is blessed to have you as his mother.”

  The words calmed the insecurities in Hunter’s heart, how she wanted to be such a wonderful mother, give her son the world lay it at his feet if at all possible. “Thank you, Angel, but tell me, have you rested enough. You seem positively aglow.”

  Angel nodded, blushing slightly, a blush which Hunter did not miss, she knew that twinkle in Angel’s eye, only because she had such a twinkle herself. “Angel!” She exclaimed, jumping slightly where the baby jumped also and she quickly quieted down, shushing Ethan. “Who is he?”

  “Who is who?” Angel replied, her hands clasping her hot cheeks. “Oh…Hunter,” she cried out.

  “Who is he who put such heat in your cheeks, I should ask, my friend?”

  And then Angel smiled, because she could not contain her secret anymore. “It is…your brother…Asher.”

  But instead of happiness, Hunter frowned, mightily, shaking her head, she pursed her lips. “Angel, I warned you about, Asher. Not him, please. Of all my brothers I wished you with, he is the absolutely last one I would ever want you to fall for.”

  “But why ever not?” Angel asked.

  “Because, he is such…Asher is…he can be very hurtful...cold, uncaring.” Before Angel could interrupt Hunter lifted her hand. “No, do, please hear me out, for your own good. I will tell you Asher’s history, not to defame his character and lessen him before you, but to protect your heart. Asher had a very hard life, harder perhaps than mine. He will not give you any part of him, he is cold, calculating, I am sure he had plans of seducing you upon first sight. He will not promise you love or marriage. It is not within him to do so. Angel, please, whatever thoughts you have upon him, upon a future, see them to rest immediately, it will bode ill of you.”

  Hunter’s words caused Angel paused. But that did not stop her heart beating with wonderment at the love affair that she already was partaking of. “These words of yours, I truly do hear, my friend, truly I do. However, I cannot live with myself if I simply walk away from where this might lead. Please, Hunter, be happy for me. For the first time in my life, I feel fulfilled, happy, I feel at peace, something I thought I’d never feel. There is something about Asher, Hunter that makes me feel whole and completed. And I cannot speak for him, I do not know what he feels, but if he feels even a small smidgen of what I feel, then how could you expect me to walk away from him?”

  “But Angel, he will break your heart, I know it with every ounce of my being. There is this part of him that grows cold, that does not care, a part of him which he allows no one entrance. He is a bitter man; he knew exactly what to do to say to seduce you. You will be another conquest to him, no more.”

  Angel paused. “Would you rather me take a chance, take a chance that my heart will be broken than no chance at all. I can’t live like that, Hunter. I would rather, years from now, regret trying than not trying at all. No one knows the paths which we will take, but on this, I travel this path with my eyes wide open.”

  Hunter stared at her; she knew Angel’s mind was already more than made up. Angel was stubborn like that, tenacious, something Hunter had always admired about her. “Alright, Angel, I will no longer speak of what I fear. If this is what you want, than I will stand beside you, because you are my friend and I love you. But God help Asher if he breaks your heart.”

  Angel smiled, laughing, holding her friends hand. “You do not know how much your words mean to me, Hunter, thank you. And I do take them to heart. If it ends badly I will have no one to blame but myself. I will remember that. But I am near twenty five, I am ready, I believe, finally, for this.” She said.

  The two spoke on other subjects, more than an hour later after Ethan awoke to be fed, Hunter regretfully said good bye to Hunter, leaving her rooms and wandering the great castle which she shared with Gabriel.

  The home, no castle, Angel thought, was large, exceedingly so, renovated time and time again as the years went on, made modern each and every passing year, and now even though a castle still warm and loving. It was with great pleasure that Angel found her way outside, servants busy, the family, none of which she’d yet to see, surely also busy, as Angel walked the estate before finding herself less than a mile away from the estates, a secluded glen with a small pond, alone for the taking.

  She smiled delightfully, the day warm and only slightly cloudy, easing her shoes off and sitting upon a log, trailing her toes in the water and watching the fish dart away, the small lake fed by a freshwater spring. It was so peaceful here, so tranquil it was with little wonder that she did not hear Caleb until he was within three feet of her.

  “Good afternoon,” he said, startling Angel out of her daydream as she glanced up in surprise.

  “Oh, sir, I did not here, good day to you,” she returned, feeling somewhat guilty at having him find her with her shoes off, her dress around her knees, which she dropped a few inches.

  “Ah, and here, I knew, you are really a water nymph, because there cannot be any human female as beautiful as you,” he flirtatiously said, still standing beside her log.

  Angel shook her head, smiling. “No, sir, I am but a human, a lowly female here to keep the fishes company,” she said.

  “You are anything but a lowly female,” he returned. “May I join you?”

  She nodded, slightly hesitant, looking around, hoping that Asher would perhaps be in attendance with him. “Your brothers are not with you?” She asked.

  Caleb shook his head, sitting within a respectable distance from her, one knee bent, where he laid his elbow upon. “No, they are all about, doing what not, more than likely stepping over each other.”

  “Oh, but you do love them sir, I know,” she returned.

  Caleb laughed, squinting at the sun. “Yes, of course,” he said, sounding unconvincing while Angel laughed.

  “Of course you do, they are your family, what I wouldn’t give to have brothers and sisters, no matter how annoying.”

  He could not ignore the wistful tone in her voice and cocked his head. “You are an only child, I presume?”

  Angel nodded. “You presume rightly, sir. And so therefore, I know you love your brothers…and sister, as I could sense it. Don’t ever take them for granted, I pray you. You do not know how special your family is.”

  Caleb studied her, her thoughtfulness touched him, and he nodded. “You are right, of course, Ms. Barrett. And what of your family, I have heard, some small rumor of your past, would you be willing to divulge the rest to curious ears?”

  Angel nodded, even though it hurt, sharing her past with others would perhaps help someone else. “My father, of course, is white, his family is from Ireland, I am sure he has distant kin there, but they left the country in the early 1700’s. My mother was an African slave. He was the heir and only son to a successful plantation owner in Virginia and my mother, well, you know the way of the world, sir, there love affair was doomed from the beginning. When my father told his father that he intended to marry my mother, he had her sold, many times and my father tried unsuccessfully to find her in the ensuing years. He never did, and that is also partially to blame because my mother felt as if it was for the best knowing they would have no future. She did not tell me the history of my father until on her death bed.”

  Caleb nodded, thoughtful, he knew she left many things out: the hurt, the abandonment and betrayal
she must have felt, but Angel shrugged it off as if it was a common occurrence, smiling. “Such a depressing story, is it not? Thank God, alive, I found my father, we found each other and so, it is happily ever after, and wouldn’t you say so?”

  “I certainly would say so, Ms. Barrett.”

  Angel looked up, it was getting late she had such a late start on the day, the sun was settling in the sky, preparing for its departure for the day. “I must be leaving, now, and ready myself for dinner.”

  She stood, placing her stockings and shoes back on while Caleb watched, he to getting up. “Shall I escort you to the estate?”

  Angel nodded, “Yes, thank you,” as they walked side by side, Angel careful to not touch Caleb and keeping a respectful distance between the two.

  When they reached the castle, they parted at the stairs, Caleb to the study to speak to Gabe and Angel to her rooms. She escaped there, refusing to read anything in Caleb’s flirtatious manner, knowing flirting must surely run in the family, but the only one she had eyes for was Asher. Humming lightly, she washed up, placing an ice white dinner dress on, its startling brightness making her golden skin glow and her black hair seem even blacker. In a high chignon with loose tendrils about her face, Angel studied her features in the mirror, not particularly vain but wanting to look extra special for Asher, whom she had not seen since they’d left each other in the bathing room.

  Satisfied with her dress, she breathed in and out, trying to calm her raging emotions, and finally she left her room, the hour now striking seven, the time when the family gathered, the men to drink and the women to converse as she made her way to the study.

  She heard the voices, and felt hesitant, the door half opened as a male servant escorted her inside, where the conversation quieted for a moment, while Maria stood from her seat, greeting Angel.

  “Angel, my dear, how marvelous you look, quite refreshed and well rested, do take a seat, you do know Hunter will not be able to join us, she still needs to rest and Gabe has decided to have dinner with her and their new family, Lauran along with them.”

  Angel nodded as Maria pulled her closer, Angel noticing that there were more people than she had first thought. The brothers all in attendance, Asher she saw, was speaking to his brother, David, and he spared her not a look, even though she could not presume to know that he hadn’t noticed her.

  Her stomach dropped a little as Maria pulled her to the gathering of people she had yet to meet.

  The grouping turned towards the two women, Maria making the introductions, first to Gabe’s family. “This is Lord Michael Branth, and his wife, Lady Lydia, Gabriel’s cousins,” she introduced, as Angel respectively curtseyed. The couple nodded, sharing introductions as Angel was greeted to Gabriel’s other cousin, Henry and his wife, Sophia and their children: Edward and Jane.” Edward and Jane were one year apart, Edward the eldest at nineteen and Jane eighteen.

  Angel was then introduced to many members of Hunter’s family, uncles, aunts, cousins and to Ethan’s brother, Drake and his oldest son, Anthony who was nearly the same age as Asher, handsome and tall with ruddy coloring and the mahogany hair of his father and uncle.

  “Delightful,” Anthony said, bowing low over Angel’s hand, an interested gleam in his eye which Angel did not miss. She politely smiled, and as soon as respectable pulled her hand away from Anthony who didn’t seem to mind, smiling at the thrill of another challenge.

  Too many women swooned at his feet, perhaps this interesting and insanely beautiful American woman would be exactly what he needed to end his humdrum boredom of lately. “Yes, Hunter’s childhood friend from America, please, you must tell me of your country and your own background, my lady,” he began.

  “Oh, I am sure I will bore you to tears,” Angel returned smartly but Anthony did nothing except laugh, waving her words away.

  “Never, my lady,” he said, disarming her with his charming smile, a deep dimple in his right cheek.

  Angel wanted to roll her eyes, wanting to yell at the room as a whole that she was not interested in any man there, except Asher, speaking of which, he had yet to greet her, even though the rest of the brothers had. She felt apprehension in her heart, assuming that she had somehow did some wrong and instantly wanted to right whatever was the matter.

  As Anthony, Maria and Drake spoke, Angel kept quiet, surveying the room until she landed upon Asher. He stood in a quiet corner, alone, a snifter of brandy in his hands which he was just now swirling, before taking a small sip of, when he met her eyes. And instead of warmth as Angel knew was in her eyes, his held cold frigidity, as her smile died slowly upon her lips.

  Angel felt her heart thud irregularly in her chest, as she wanted to reach him, ask him what had she done wrong and how could she correct the matter as soon as possible. Her eyes looked hopeful, still upon Asher, biting her lower lip, begging him, no pleading him with her eyes to look favorably upon her.

  He didn’t, instead, beginning a conversation with Caleb dropping his gaze from hers to turn towards his brother, his back now to her.

  Angel tried, fighting to regain her composure, turning towards Anthony with a false smile, even though she felt as if she was sinking in a bottomless pit of mire at Asher’s cold rebuttal of her. She thought, quickly, of anything she could have done wrong, and damned herself for her inexperience in love affairs, not knowing how an experienced, worldly woman acted, and knowing she fell far from the bar.

  Feeling cold inside, Angel excused herself, nearly fleeing from the room, hastily making her way back to her room, her composure unraveled, as she closed the door behind her, leaning heavily against it, her heart in her throat as she squeezed her eyes, trying so hard to uncover whatever hidden thing inside of her which would cause Asher to rebut her so thoroughly. Remembering Hunter’s words of earlier, Angel shook her head, no, it did not matter she knew she was already half in love with Asher, she would just have to win him back over, yes, she thought to herself. If she had not the opportunity tonight, she would go to his rooms and beg him to tell her what was amiss.

  Feeling better, she smoothed her skirts, regaining her composure before once more heading towards the study. The butler had just announced dinner was served, as Anthony found her. “May I escort you to dinner, Ms. Barrett?” He asked.

  Angel looked around widely, but did not see Asher, and so, she nodded hesitantly, placing her hand upon his elbow, more than a respectable distance between the two.

  It was with her luck that she was sitting next to Asher, who had entered the dining room table seconds after Anthony had escorted her to her seat, Jane one of Hunters’ cousins seated to her left.

  She smiled, to herself as they sat, Asher stiffly beside her as small talk issued around the table, the guests being served by the staff. As soon as was polite and as soon as Jane began speaking to another cousin, on the other side of her, Angel hesitantly turned towards Asher, who had just finished speaking with David.

  “Hello, Asher,” she said, smiling, refusing to be put off by his cold demeanor.

  Asher nodded a brief glance her way. “Ms. Barrett,” he returned in an off handed manner, before waving towards a servant to refill his wine glass.

  Angel was not to be perturbed, however. “How was your day?” She began again, once the servant had left and conversation was flowing around the table in private couplings.

  “It lacked much.”

  Angel felt her heart dropped, she bit her lip, dropping her eyes, feeling as small as the peas upon her plate. Her appetite fled, even though she had not eaten anything today. Not being able to speak, her hands dropped to her lap, unused to such a cold and callous misuse of her person for someone she cared so deeply about and had shared so much of herself within such a short time. “I am sorry to hear of such, was it some fault of another?” She asked, barely managing to keep the tremble out of her voice.

  “Of course,” he returned smoothly, before dismissing her, turning back towards David whom asked of him a question.

  A
ngel remembered Hunter’s words, remembered how adamantly she had not wanted her friend to fall for her brother. How many hearts he had broken, how callous he could be, but Angel had refused to listen, not when her heart was in control. She felt like a silly, little girl, stupid really and tried valiantly to converse with Jane and others at the table. She failed horribly, when more than one person asked her if she was feeling ill, and finally, unable to stand it anymore, Angel excused herself early, blaming her long and exhaustive trip for her weariness, leaving the room as the gentlemen stood at her removal.

  Chapter 5

  How stupid I am, she cried to herself, in her bed, still fully clothed, tears blending with the rumpled hair she had unpinned, a headache forming behind her eyes. She blamed it on the hair pins but knew it to be the tension she had felt since seeing Asher and having him mistreat her. And still, Angel thought the fault to lie within her, knowing she was unsophisticated, young and many other things, too innocent to hold the attention of Asher.

  The sobs wouldn’t leave her, however, and Angel cried herself to sleep. When she awakened, hours later the clock was just striking one. It was extremely dark, the fire which a servant had built had long since died, and Angel lit a candle, using the basin of water in her room to wash her face of the dried tears upon her cheeks.

  She studied her reflection, feeling morose, before remembering her promise of earlier. She would see Asher, ask him what she had done wrong and beg him for a second chance.

  Smiling, she brushed out her hair until it lay in shiny waves to her waist, humming lightly that perhaps she could make what was wrong right, make Asher smile and be pleased with her.

  Walking hurriedly to the bathing room, she crossed over it, the door to Asher’s dressing closet, unlocked, there she breathed deeply, closing the door softly, making her way through the dressing closet, following the glow of light from the half closed door.

  At the door, she paused, peeking around it; she saw his form, asleep, upon the bed, his broad chest bare, a thin cover riding low on his stomach. Her own stomach tightened at the sight of him and Angel slowly and softly walked towards his bed, his breathing deep and heavy.