A Bookworm for Christmas (Gay Romance)

by Trina Solet

  "Let me guess. Bruce?" Miles said as the big man shook his hand in a crushing grip.

  "The one and only," Bruce said and gave him a blindingly confident grin.

  "There's probably more than one Bruce," Gavin grumbled next to him and looked ready to slap Bruce's hand away if he didn't let go of Miles right now. "This is Miles. Are you planning to let go of his hand any time soon?"

  Not to be outdone by that show of jealousy, Miles took his hand back from Bruce and put his arm around Gavin. One arm slung over his shoulders possessively, Miles eyed Bruce with a look that wasn't at all hostile, but that did say very clearly, "Mine. Do not touch."

  Bruce seemed amused by the gesture. "Back in the day, I always wanted to come by the bookstore and have a look at you, but I never got the chance before you skedaddled."

  "Have a look at me? Why?" Miles wondered and looked over at Gavin, who hung his head. Now Miles was even more interested in the answer, but both Bruce and Gavin wanted to get their kids home and to bed.

  "Marv doesn't have to go to bed early like I do. He's so much bigger than me," Benji said as they all went to the parking lot then split up to go to their respective cars.

  "So much bigger," Miles said.

  "Aha. Marv said kindergarten isn't even real school," Benji said and looked from Gavin to Miles to see if they agreed.

  "Do you get homework?" Miles asked him.

  "Yes. I get homework all the time," Benji told him.

  "Then it's school," Miles said as Gavin unlocked the car and opened the back door for Benji.

  "Did you have fun?" Gavin asked Benji as he climbed in and let his dad buckle him into the seat.

  "Yes. Did you?" he wanted to know.

  Gavin got a funny look on his face and didn't answer right away. What kind of fun was he thinking about? Miles had some idea. That's why he answered for him.

  "We had lots of fun, but we missed you," Miles told Benji, who beamed at him then looked shy and tiny in his car seat.

  When they dropped Miles off at his place, Gavin got out to say goodnight.

  "So that was Bruce. I don't know who would be into that," Miles said and glared at Gavin.

  "Not me," Gavin told him.

  "I can't believe you hang out with that guy. My friend Candice can't beat that, not in biceps circumference or in the pec area. If she can't compete, then neither can I," Miles complained.

  "Then I guess it's a good thing you don't need to," Gavin told him. "Bruce and I went out exactly once and nothing came of it. And here I am asking you to go out with me again."

  "That does make me feel a tiny bit better," Miles said and rewarded him with a kiss. Then he remembered how Bruce said he wanted to meet him. "Why was he so interested in meeting me back when I used to work for you anyway?" His eyes narrowed suspiciously at Gavin, who squirmed a little.

  "Because he could tell I was having inappropriate thoughts about you," Gavin admitted with a resigned sigh.

  "Tell me more. How pervy were these thoughts?"

  "I'll save it for next time," Gavin told him, ready to drive his kid home.

  "Thank you for tonight. Every second of it was amazing," Miles said. Getting uncharacteristically serious, he put his heart into every word.

  "You are amazing," Gavin said and he kissed him tenderly.

  As he drove away, Miles and Benji waved at each other until the car turned and sped out of sight. Then Miles just stood there for a while. It felt like things were really starting, but he still worried. That was only one date, and Gavin had dated a bunch of guys, even that Bruce.

  None of those guys managed to seal the deal. And from what Gavin said, none of them came close to capturing his heart. That's why Gavin was still a free man. Miles was ready to hand over his heart to him, but he had a feeling that Gavin wouldn't be so easy to nail down.

  Chapter 14

  It had been two days since their date, and in that time Miles and Gavin had only exchanged a few friendly texts. Miles could have dropped by the store, but after their date went so well, he didn't want to risk messing things up. That didn't mean he could wait forever to see Gavin again, and this morning he reached the limit of his endurance.

  Since he had classes today, Miles rushed to get to the bookstore. He was still clutching the keys to his apartment when he swung open the doors of the bookstore and went over to hug Gavin and give him a quick good morning kiss.

  "I practically jumped out of bed and came straight here so I could see you before class. I haven't even had coffee. Caffeinate me," Miles demanded as soon as his lips parted from Gavin's.

  "Good morning," Gavin said as if this was the right time to practice good manners.

  "My lips already said good morning. Caffeinate me already," Miles told him.

  Gavin led the way into the back where the coffeemaker was sitting on a little cabinet with wheels. Not that any coffee was going or anything. "I was going to make some tea but..."

  At the mention of tea, Miles didn't even bother to let him finish what he was saying. "You are so grandma. I'll make some joe like a real man."

  "Half the world drinks tea, you know," Gavin pointed out as he searched for some coffee in the cupboard under the coffeemaker.

  "And I feel sorry for those guys. Maybe coffee isn't legal over there or something."

  "I'm afraid it's not very fresh," Gavin said as he unearthed a can of coffee and handed it over.

  Miles grabbed the can, grateful that he had any at all. He opened it and found that there wasn't much in there, but it would do. Once he got it started, the coffeemaker dribbled out the coffee too slowly for his liking. Miles leaned down to glare at the meager puddle of very dark coffee through the murky glass of the carafe. "Is this thing clogged? The way it's going, I won't be drinking coffee until next week."

  Gavin shrugged. "I haven't used it recently. Meredith drinks tea too. I did use it for a while to make tea, but then I got the little microwave in here."

  "You used it to make tea? Sacrilege! If my coffee tastes funny, I'll know who to blame," Miles told him.

  "I can still make you some perfectly drinkable tea if you want. I have green and black," Gavin offered.

  "I won't fall for your tricks. Black tea is a complete misnomer. More like slightly brownish."

  "You sure are crabby before you have your coffee," Gavin said with a smile.

  Miles scratched his head and gave him an apologetic look. "I have many layers. This is my 'before I've had my first cup of coffee' layer."

  Miles felt better once the coffee was ready and he had a few scalding sips of utter bitterness.

  "How is the coffee?" Gavin asked him when he came out from the back with his cup.

  "It's awful but it's heaven," Miles told him.

  "You and coffee have a very strange and dysfunctional relationship," Gavin decided.

  "Speaking of relationships," Miles said.

  "Were we?" Gavin said evasively.

  "We were. And there is something I want," Miles said and he stared at him intently, like he could will him to agree to his demands.

  "Something other than coffee?"

  "I want you to throw yourself into this wholeheartedly. I don't want to be dropped after a few dates."

  "I can't make any promises, but I'll try," Gavin said.

  "I'll accept that answer if you bribe me with sex. Flip the closed sign and we'll go in the back," Miles said. There were no customers there yet, but they could show up any minute. He was breathless as he waited for his reply.

  In answer, Gavin took the coffee cup from his hand and set it on the counter. With a hand on his chest, he pushed Miles toward the back as he went to close up. Miles went into the back buzzing from coffee and the promise of sex. It would have to be a quickie. To save time, Miles unzipped his fly and started to take his sweater off. That's when he heard the door chime and a woman's voice. It was Meredith.

  "Oh, you're here," she said, surprised.

  Miles froze though she was still in front and could
n't see him. She was speaking to Gavin, who had made it only as far as the doorway leading to the back room. Now he turned back while Miles zipped up his fly. He realized that she must have a key.

  "I saw the closed sign, and I thought you had to step out," Meredith said, her voice getting closer. "I just came in to pick up that order for the Regency reading group," she said.

  "I'll get it," Gavin said and came into the back to grab a box. He took it back to Meredith without letting her know that Miles was back there. "Do you want me to carry it to the car for you?" he asked her.

  "Oh, no. I can manage," Meredith said.

  Miles heard the door chime and risked taking a peek out in front. He saw Gavin opening the door for Meredith and the box she carried. It seemed like Gavin was ready to lock up again as soon as she was gone. But just as he held the door open for Meredith, two other women walked into the store. So much for that quickie in the back.

  Giving up, Miles sighed and slumped over in the doorway to the back of the store. Gavin smiled at him apologetically. He flipped the sign to open and resigned himself to being a responsible business owner for the rest of the day. Hearing Gavin greet the newly arrived customers, Miles went over to lean next to him at the register.

  "Coming here to try and seduce me again?" Gavin asked.

  "Is that what I did? I said two words. I think it was you who seduced me," Miles claimed.

  "I was just minding my own business."

  "That's when you're at your most irresistible," Miles said. "I have to go now. I'll be back later today. Is that OK?"

  "I'll look forward to it," Gavin said and gave him an encouraging smile.

  Well he was willing to close up shop for Miles. That was a good sign.

  All day in class, Miles' thoughts strayed to when he would get to see Gavin again. He couldn't stand to be away from him. Being denied only made him want him more. Classes couldn't finish soon enough. Between classes, Miles called Candice and confessed to her that he might have a Gavin addiction.

  "I don't want to be that guy – clingy, needing to see him all the time."

  She had some straightforward advice for him. "Then don't be that guy. Be a different guy."

  "I kind of want to be myself. I want this to be real. I'm just afraid that he'll never take the real me seriously." He knew he wasn't Gavin's type and that worried him.

  "Probably not," she said easily.

  "Don't agree with me. Encourage me. Tell me not to give up," he instructed her.

  "OK, then. By all means go ahead and make a fool of yourself."

  "Damn right I will. That man is worth it." Miles was insanely determined to see him as often as he could no matter how it made him look.

  "Always happy to help encourage your worst instincts," Candice told him before she hung up.

  Actually Miles had called her because she wasn't sappy. He needed a cold dose of reality where Gavin was concerned. Two years ago, Miles was sure that he didn't stand a chance with Gavin. He wasn't sure that much had changed since then, only enough for him to get a foot in the door. He wasn't all the way in though. That's why he was afraid that the wrong move might get the door slammed in his face.

  Once he was done with his last class, Miles texted Gavin. He was on his way to pick up Benji from kindergarten, and Miles decided to meet them on the way back. Why should Miles waste time pretending he wanted to be anywhere else besides with those two?

  The day was bright and sunny. As he came up to them on the street, Benji spotted him first and yelled his name. The three of them grabbed some burritos for lunch and ate them while walking around. Benji spotted a tiny dog in a lady's purse and waved to him until the doggy was out of sight.

  "That lady is so lucky," Benji pouted while Gavin wiped sauce off his chin.

  "You'll have a dog some day. I promise," Gavin said and Benji cheered up immediately.

  Seeing that they were near his apartment building, Miles invited them to come up and see his place. Benji was eager to see where he lived, so he was guaranteed to be disappointed by the cramped, grubby place Miles shared with his roommate, Darren.

  Not that Darren was around much these days. As they went in through the front door, Miles told Gavin and Benji, "My roommate is always at his boyfriend's. That's his room." He pointed at his closed bedroom door. Then he pointed to the bedroom with the door standing open. "That's mine."

  One thing stood out to Benji immediately. He stuck his arm straight out with an accusing finger pointing at Miles' rumpled sheets and blanket. "He didn't make his bed," Benji noted disapprovingly.

  "I'll speak to him about that," Gavin said solemnly.

  "I didn't know I was going to have guests," Miles said in his own defense.

  "Are we the guests?" Benji asked his dad.

  "You are very special guests," Miles told him.

  Other than what he told them, he couldn't give them much of a tour. They could see the whole place right from the front door – a tiny kitchen, a narrow living room with an old couch and a much newer TV. Predictably, what caught Gavin's eye was the bookshelf.

  "I see you found some room for books," Gavin said.

  "Don't make me sound like a book freak. You're the book freak," Miles told him and stood in front of the shelf like he wanted to hide it from him.

  Benji looked up at him. "Is that like a bookworm?" he wanted to know.

  "That's another word for it. Yeah," Gavin told him.

  "I'm a bookworm too," Benji said to Miles proudly.

  Now that the tour was complete, Miles scooped up various debris from the couch and invited them to sit down. While Miles looked for where he could dump the sweater, various books and magazines that had littered the couch, Gavin leaned by the fridge. Benji wasn't interested in sitting either. He wanted to explore the vast, uncharted territory of Miles' apartment.

  This worried Gavin a little, "There's nothing pornographic around here, is there?" he whispered to Miles.

  "Not that he'll be able to find," Miles assured him.

  Gavin narrowed his eyes at him. "So that's a yes."

  "We don't have anything lying around. It's all in electronic form," Miles told him.

  Though Benji was busy looking at the books and everything else he and Darren crammed on the shelves, Gavin continued to whisper in Miles' ear. "I guess the days of porn mags under the bed are over. But when I adopted Benji, I did have to lock away some vintage treasures."

  "I am going to need to have a look at your stash," Miles told him.

  "It's not a stash. It's a collection. Did you not hear me say the word vintage?" Gavin told him.

  "Whatever you want to call it, I'm going to need to see it," Miles said as he ducked into the kitchen to see what he could offer his guests to eat and drink. That reminded him of something. "You know, Darren said I could never be a parent because I forgot a tub of ice cream on the counter once and it melted."

  "Ice cream?" Benji asked. He had sneaked up on Miles. Standing on the other side of the refrigerator door, he leaned over to peer up at Miles.

  "No, we don't have any. I was just saying that my friend was mad at me for leaving some ice cream on the counter to melt," Miles explained to him.

  "Oh, no!" Benji looked stricken. "Was it alright?" he asked mournfully.

  "The ice cream was OK, pretty much. It got a littlie icy when we put it to freeze again, but we ate it anyway," Miles told him.

  "OK," Benji said with a relieved huff, then he admonished Miles. "But don't do it again."

  "I won't, I promise," Miles said. As he watched Benji going off to explore the mysteries of his apartment some more, Miles noticed Gavin grinning at him.

  "For someone who can't be trusted with a tub of ice cream, you're pretty good with Benji," he said and came to join him in the kitchen. "He has really taken a shine to you."

  "And that worries you," Miles guessed.

  "A little. But I can hardly tell him not to like you when I'm setting such a bad example."

  "You mean you
like me too?" Miles nudged him to get him to say more.

  "I didn't realize that was a secret. I thought a few things we've done might have given me away."

  "But it's not just physical, right. We have a real connection right, right, right?" Miles demanded.

  "You need me to tell you?" he said, but he was just trying to avoid answering.

  "Obviously! Give me an answer, but know that I will only accept a yes."

  "Then you're not really asking, are you?" Gavin said but then he told him what he wanted to hear "Yes. We have something. It's not just physical." He said it grudgingly so Miles knew he still had plenty of reason to worry. But he had admitted it, however reluctantly, so there was also reason to hope.

  Since Darren wasn't expected back, they made themselves comfortable and ordered in some Chinese. After dinner, they watched Darren's bootleg copy of the Star Wars Holiday Special. It was so exciting, it put Benji out like a light. With the little guy asleep on the couch, Gavin and Miles sneaked away. They went to hang out in Miles' bedroom like two teenagers. Gavin sat sideways on the bed and bounced a little like he was testing it out. He noticed Miles frowning at his phone.

  "Is everything OK?"

  "My sister is texting to make sure I'm not mad at her. Yesterday she called and worked on me to try to get me to go home for Christmas. We kind of argued. She accused me of not caring, but she cooled off since then, I guess," Miles explained as he texted her back to say everything was peachy.

  His conversations with his parents had been exhausting too, with both his mom and dad pretending everything was fine even as Miles exiled himself from all family gatherings that included his grandfather. They asked him to reconsider and join them, but they all knew it was best for everyone concerned if Miles stayed away.

  Miles slumped down on the bed next to Gavin. "I didn't have Thanksgiving with my family, and I'm not going to spend Christmas with them either. My homophobic grandfather is going to be there. I'm not going to sit at the same table with him and listen to him telling me that I'm going to burn in Hell. Merry Christmas to me."