Lost in Shadow (A Shadow Walkers Ghost Novel)

by Cynthia Luhrs

  “How can you not feel any pain? I bruised a rib once, and it was weeks before I could breathe without wincing.”

  “Lass, I don’t allow myself to feel pain, pain gets you killed, I don’t have time for it.” Not to bloody mention if he didn’t keep those emotions locked away tight, he’d curl up in a ball in the corner crying for his mommy; those memories carried the power to cut him down.

  Wanting to lose himself in her, he leaned down capturing a nipple in his mouth, cutting off her reply as he licked and suckled the nipple, feeling it tighten as she arched beneath him, her fingers tangled in his hair.

  He slid his palm slowly down the length of her body, stroking her curves and softness, marveling at how amazing her body was, he reached what he was seeking, his fingers stroking her, teasing her. She shifted, wordlessly trying to tell him what she craved when he started grinding his palm against her bud, fingers delving inside her, pumping in and out while his palm kept pulsing against her. Hips thrusting up to meet his hand, she brought her knees up, spreading them wide, giving him full access to her while she fisted the sheet in her hand, twisting it tighter and tighter as her body responded to his touch. His other hand continued to roll her nipple between his fingers as she cried out. Pressure was building inside her, her skin flushed from the heated air as she rocked against his hand.

  Enthralled, he moved closer to her, filled with wonder at the sight. Catching her scent, he almost came on the spot

  Her knees slammed together. “What’s wrong? Why did you stop?”

  “Wrong? Not a single bloody thing. My god, you’re so beautiful…smell so delicious, so wet and ready for me, I need to taste ye.” Dipping his head, he licked her, lapping, over and over, flicking his tongue against her as she writhed in the bed. The tension eased out of her as her head fell back and her knees opened wider, allowing him the access he craved. Sweeping his tongue from side to side, he took her deeper into his mouth, hearing her keen with need. Circling her nub, he latched on; sucking to a rhythm only he could hear, playing her body like a fine instrument. Flicking his tongue, she arched, fisting the sheets. Scraping his teeth gently across her mound, he grabbed her thighs, locking her against his mouth.

  Penetrating her with his tongue, she rocked hard against him.

  “Oh, please don’t stop, I’m almost there…” Arching off the bed, Emily exploded as her orgasm rocked her, a second more intense orgasm followed as he lapped and licked every drop, rubbing his whiskers against her sensitive sex, wringing one last orgasm out of her as she finished against his mouth.

  Peaches, she not only smelled like them, she tasted like them. Forever, he’d bite into the juicy fruit and think of her.

  His control shattered, couldn’t wait another second as he thrust into her, filling her to the hilt. She bent her knees deeper to take him in. He belonged inside her. Pleasure unlike anything he’d ever experienced filled him. Thrusting in and out, deeper and deeper, he looked down at Emily, the bliss on her face, almost causing him to spill. “By the gods, you steal my very breath.”

  Grabbing her ankles and lifting them onto his shoulders to allow him to penetrate her more deeply, he groaned. She was so hot, and wet, and tight, gripping him with each thrust, her thighs shook. He increased the tempo and slid in harder and deeper while reaching his hand back to her…pressing his finger against her cleft, tapping, tapping, tapping. Emily was staring at something, he glanced down at his arms, seeing the hair standing straight up. Their hair was floating in the breeze—before he could make sense of what he was seeing, he felt her tumble over the edge of the cliff, muscles clenching around his cock as she screamed, “Colin.”

  “Mine.” He growled, following her over the cliff, his entire body trembling in ecstasy.

  Withdrawing from her, taking her in his arms, Emily’s body screamed in protest at the broken contact. Worshipped…it was the only way to explain what Colin did to her. She felt boneless, laying there in his arms while he played with her hair, winding it through his fingers.

  Panic rolled over her…she couldn’t do this, couldn’t let someone get this close, she hardly knew anything about him, and what she did know would send any sane woman running away fast. The sting of betrayal curled around her brain, sending hateful tendrils to her heart—he will betray you, like Charlie betrayed you. Hating the mean, inner critic, she shook her head, willing it to go away.

  She’d been tearing down her walls ever since he’d told her of his own betrayals, the pain evident in his voice, the wounds deep, lashing out when he felt vulnerable, she could understand those feelings, respect them. Telling the voice in her head to beat it, she made a decision…to try. Try and trust this warrior, try to let him in, try not to push him away. Believing in following her heart, she wanted this strong, damaged man with every fiber of her being. Let the chips fall where they may, she needed Colin, couldn’t imagine being without him. She would only think about now, living in the moment, not worrying about tomorrow or going back to Charleston and leaving Colin, she’d worry about it another day…but not tonight…tonight she would feel.

  She snuggled closer to him. Would never get enough of his scent—who would have thought the smell of leather and the tang of the ocean could smell so sexy?

  Colin had his eyes closed, breathing deeply. She hoped they hadn’t made his injuries worse. He traced lazy circles on her body, she shivered, his touch sending tingles through her.

  Something niggled at her memory…

  “Our hair was standing on end, like before lighting strikes…come to think of it, why does the air look silver and feel so warm?” she asked puzzlement filling her voice.

  “’Tis part of being a Shadow Walker…I told ye we’re all made of energy? Well, during sex, we release energy, it manifests as heat and electricity—‘tis why our hair stood on end. The silver light is part of our makeup; we serve Thorne who bears allegiance to the Moon goddess so we have silver light or when we are killed, silver dust. The Day Walkers, serving Dayne, who is allied with the Sun god, have golden light and dust. Look how the silver sparkles on your skin.”

  Wiping a finger down her arm, she was puzzled; her skin sparkled as if she’d put some sort of shimmery lotion on it but the dust didn’t come off.

  “It won’t come off. Will I walk around all the time sparkling?”

  Grinning, he told her, “No, it will fade away in a few hours. It happens sometimes during sex. All walkers have to be careful when having sex so we don’t steal your energy.”

  “What do you mean, like some kind of siphoning off or alien suction tube stuff?” Wrinkling her nose in thought, she waited for an answer.

  “You have no idea how bloody sexy you are when your wrinkle your nose or bite your lip when you’re thinking,” he growled at her, leaning in to kiss her.

  Stunned. Never wanted any man like this, not even Charlie. She was a desperate pool of liquid need as his touch ignited her.

  Breaking off the kiss, he fondled her breast. “No aliens. Day Walkers steal a human’s energy which ages them instantly or they keep going and kill the human—it is forbidden to do either but they prey upon the innocent and think the prize is worth it…it makes them stronger, taking in energy. When we recharge, it doesn’t make us any stronger—you have to kill another Walker, then you take their energy and become stronger. The lowlife’s cheat by stealing from humans…”

  Emily interrupted him, holding a hand up in the air, in the universal stop gesture.

  “Hold on, stop the presses—AGE THEM? My god, if that got out, it would strike terror in every woman in the world. We fight every day to look young…my mother drilled it into me when I was in high school. This could cause a worldwide panic. No, I think women all over would take up arms to kill the Day Walkers for daring to age them and undo all that hard work. Think about it, an army of angry women, you could rule the world.” She snickered, then sobered as she realized, fudge, they wouldn’t be able to see them to fight them unless like her they’d been to the other side
and back. Oh well, nice idea.

  She relaxed, putting Day Walkers out of her mind, thinking of the mind-blowing sex they’d had, she sighed, snuggling closer into Colin’s side, leaning up, softly kissing his temple.

  He wasn’t moving; did she do something wrong?

  “Are you OK?” Stroking his cheek, Colin seemed surprised by her affection. Her heart broke…had he been without a kind word or touch for so long?

  “Fine, not used to spending this much time with someone—‘tis nice.”

  Emily swung her leg over him, getting closer, running her hand over his chest, lost in a dreamlike state. Faster than she could blink, Colin lifted her up on top of him, impaling her with his heavy, thick cock.

  “You’re ready again, so soon?”

  “Oh darlin’, I’ve only just started, there are so many ways I’m going to make you come tonight, you won’t be able to walk in the morning.”

  He proceeded to prove it to her over the next several hours as they made love in the bed, on the floor and up against the wall, the silk wall coverings sensuously sliding up and down against her back. He was amazing. She’d only been with a few guys—was a late bloomer; none came close to what he made her feel. What was the silly expression she’d always rolled her eyes when she heard it?…oh yeah, a hard man is good to find. It was oh so true, though he was also a good man, even if he lived by his own set of rules, not society’s laws.

  Lowering her from the wall, where she’d had another blistering orgasm, he picked her up, gently carrying her back to bed as he dipped a washcloth in the wash basin and proceeded to clean her off. Emily thought she should be mortified at this intimate act—instead she felt contentment. She didn’t know what scared her more: how quickly she was falling for Colin, knowing at this point she’d get hurt—badly—if things didn’t work out, or the thought she’d have to leave him, go back home, an entire ocean away from him, in less than a week. After all, she had a job, friends, a life back in Charleston, while he battled Day Walkers here in Scotland protecting humanity—it wasn’t like he could ask for a transfer.

  “Um Colin? We didn’t use protection…I’m not on anything…” her voice trailed away.

  “Emily lass, we don’t have any diseases, part of the perks of being immortal. We could wade through pits of plague victims and never catch a thing; not even the sniffles. I can’t get you with child, no Walker can procreate.” Children. What would it be like to have a child with Colin?

  Pouring them both a cognac, Colin climbed into bed next to Emily, pulling the sheets around them. He asked about her life in America.

  “My parents were killed in a boating accident when I was a sophomore in college. My brother is great, he’s not home often. He’s a professional fisherman so he’s always out on the water somewhere. I miss them…some days more than others. They always knew the right thing to say in any situation. Holidays are the worst, it’s when I feel lonely.” He was so easy to talk to, Emily found herself telling him about Kat and Fred, her stressful job and her hometown, all trivial things.

  “What traditions do you miss about the holidays? You said Thanksgiving was a favorite.” Wanting to know all about Colin, she started to ask him about his childhood when she looked over and saw him fast asleep. Smiling, she curled up to him, yawning once before falling into a deep sleep.

  Still half asleep, she struck out, trying to wake from her nightmare.

  “Oof.” He rubbed his stomach.

  “What? Sorry. I…it was…a bad dream.”

  Gathering her in his arms, Colin held her close, whispering to her, calming her as she came fully awake. Dim early morning light filtered in through the window, doing nothing to dispel the gloom.

  “Tell me what ye were dreaming of.”

  Still sobbing, Emily accepted the glass of water from Colin. It was so realistic, the dream brought everything back.

  “I dreamt of the accident, except this time instead of being trapped in the stream, the car caught on fire. I couldn’t get out. It was burning and while I screamed out for help, Charlie stood there and laughed…I was burning. Was such a realistic dream.” She shook, holding on to Colin as tight as she could.

  “’Twas a nightmare, it’s all right, I’m here and I won’t let anything happen to you. Breathe easy, try and go back to sleep, I’ll watch over you and keep the nightmares away.” He stroked her hair, holding her close as she drifted back to sleep. The woman appeared out of the ocean, dolphins jumping and swimming around her as a beam of sunlight illuminated her long silver sparkling hair, it looked as if fashioned from silver and diamonds. Emily recognized her…the goddess Terya. She felt peace being in her presence. “Child, you have found your path. Keep strong for there are many obstacles ahead. You will be tested…if you fail, not only will you be destined to be alone for all eternity, but you will be responsible for dooming another soul to the in-between, and the world will be pushed one step closer to the abyss of eternal darkness.” The goddess started to fade away.

  “Wait, don’t go, I have so many questions.”

  “Trust your heart, be willing to try again.”

  With that cryptic advice, Terya was gone.

  Chapter 14

  Tuesday, November 3rd

  Waking slowly, groggy, Emily tried to recall her dreams. She remembered the nightmare about Charlie; it was the other one…with the goddess, telling her to trust herself.

  Talk about your subconscious sending you a message.

  Surrounded by warmth, she stretched, feeling more rested than she had in days, it took her a moment to remember, she was in bed…with Colin. What a magical night. “Did you sleep well?” Lying on her side, looking at this magnificent warrior, she flung the covers back, heedless of their nakedness so intent on looking at him, checking the wounds on his arm and thigh. “Your injuries don’t look infected, they should heal if you take it easy for the next week,”

  “Aye lass, I slept well. Dinna worry about the injuries, they’ll heal soon enough. Though if you keep running your hands over my body, we’ll end up making love all morning, breakfast will get cold, and you’ll be cranky later when you haven’t eaten…though if you’re giving me a choice, I’m all for the sex, forget the breakfast.”

  “Breakfast? Thank goodness, I’m starved. I thought I smelled something heavenly. I didn’t hear anyone knock.” Jumping out of bed, throwing his shirt on, she went to the silver-covered trays. “I think I’ve died and gone to heaven…eggs, oatmeal, biscuits, fruit…oh my gosh, a cold Pepsi with ice, no one gives you ice here and the soda is lukewarm—you have to have it icy cold with ice and a straw, it’s the proper way to drink it. I could kiss whoever brought me this.”

  “Easy lass, it came earlier. Robert thought we’d want to sleep in. I’ll spare ye the rest of what he said. He also found a clean shirt and pants from one of the cabin boys, which should fit you fine.”

  Clean clothes, food and Pepsi—she was happy. Breakfast, then a shower. It was going to be a great day. Content, she loaded plates for both of them, bringing them back to bed so they could stay in bed, eating together.

  Over a leisurely breakfast they talked of their lives learning more about each other. “Oh, that was fantastic! I’m so full I can hardly move.” Leaning over, she kissed him on the lips. Growling, he pulled her tight against him, kissing her senseless.

  After breakfast, she showered first. The tiny shower wouldn’t accommodate them both. As Colin showered, she finished dressing. Would be glad to buy some clothes when they docked. Her breath caught when Colin walked into the room with a towel slung low around his hips.

  “Keep looking at me like I’m a second breakfast, and we’ll never leave this room.”

  Blushing, she smiled as he took her in his arms, kissing her until she was breathless.

  He looked down at her, kissed her again. “Shall we go up on deck? We’ll be coming into the harbor soon.”

  Walking around the deck, watching the village come into view, she looked up at the clear blue
sky, listening to the gulls cry, smelling the tang of the ocean breeze. Thankful…for a shower, hot meal, and most of all for Colin. Touching her fingers again, she was truly amazed at the things she was finding out were possible and actually existed in the ordered, corporate-driven world she lived in. Unconsciously, she touched her lips, still bruised from their night together. Sore as well, the ache that tells you it was a fantastic night. She was still afraid of getting hurt but determined to keep knocking down her walls.

  “Look, an otter, he’s adorable. Can I give him a fish?”

  Indulging her, Colin plucked a fish from the catch, tossing it to the otter. They watched him jumping and splashing in the water near the dock, content in companionable silence.

  Hearing boots on deck, Emily turned, “Is it you I have to thank for the Pepsi?” Smiling, brushing her hair out of her eyes, she gave Robert a hug.

  “Aye, my bonny lass, I heard you mention you liked them. Then I remembered hearing most Yanks liked their drinks icy cold so I had the lads bring some aboard, keeping it in the cold water for you. I’m glad you liked it.”

  Clapping Robert on the back, Colin was magnificent in his white shirt and kilt. She was amazed so many Scotsmen still wore them, but wasn’t complaining. The kilt was rugged and sexy as all get out, especially worn with black Doc Marten boots.

  “So where are we and where are we going again?” she asked them.

  Colin answered, pulling a ribbon from his pocket, tying her hair back for her. “We thought it safer to disembark in Inverness.”

  After gathering his troops, Rawlins appeared outside the doors to Dayne’s throne room on a pop of air which left gold dust floating like dust mites in the sun. The realm of Light was where they were offered the choice to become a Day Walker—you know, show them the glamour, leaving out the nasty bits—don’t show the ugliness until you’ve signed on the dotted line, so to speak. As far as he knew, no one had ever turned Dayne down.

  He made sure he was impeccably dressed. The god had a bitch of a temper, you never knew if you were getting pissed-off Dayne or very pissed-off Dayne, best to keep any distractions to a minimum.