A Field of Poppies

by Sharon Sala

  She frowned. “Of course I will. I’m sorry you’re having issues. You two have had a pretty rough week.”

  “Not as rough as the Sadler family, but close,” he said. “Thank you for being so considerate.”

  “You’re welcome. I’ll put a DO NOT DISTURB sign on the door.”

  Justin headed for Callie’s room, paused to take a deep breath and then went inside.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Callie was lying on her side, curled up in a fetal position. She’d slept like that when she was a brand-new baby, and even now, when she was sick or sad, Justin knew it was the position that still gave her comfort. Seeing her with a hand tucked beneath her cheek and the covers pulled up beneath her chin, he almost turned around and walked out. She looked so comfortable, he hated to disturb her. But it was a case of tell her now, or surprise her later, and this wasn’t the kind of surprise that lent itself to fun.

  Quietly, he pushed the door shut and then moved to the side of her bed to watch her sleep. His heart hurt, remembering how enamored he’d been when she was first born, and how many countless hours he’d stood and watched her sleeping, just like he was doing now.

  Only this time he wasn’t just admiring her existence. This time he was looking for the differences in their faces, rather than the similarities. When Deborah was alive, she’d often pointed out a specific mannerism or facial quirk of Callie’s that she swore mimicked his. Now, he wondered if she’d done it out of fear that one day he’d look at Callie and realize she didn’t belong.

  But there was something Deborah hadn’t taken into account. The deal was that sperm had little to do with becoming a father. That came from the immediate fear the tiny little thing you brought home from the hospital would suddenly forget to take a second breath – from the hours of walking the floor to silence their fussy cries – from the panic of knowing that they hurt and you didn’t know why.

  Fatherhood was a fluttering heartbeat when they learned to say daddy – from bloody noses and trips to the doctor. It was the hug around the neck and the inevitability of pride in realizing they were growing up just fine in spite of everything you’d done wrong. But no one ever prepared a father for a moment like this. Justin still felt like he’d been blinded and tossed into a room full of land mines – one wrong step and everything could blow up in his face. Because of a mistake he made years ago, Jessup Sadler had gone through these very same feelings only a week earlier. He had no room to be indignant. All he could do was keep reminding himself that it wasn’t about him, it was for Callie. Come what may, she was going to get her transplant and he’d gladly pay whatever the price to make it happen.

  He glanced at his watch. In a couple of hours the Tillers would be in Doctor Langley’s office being tested. Callie needed time to absorb the shock before being meeting the other side of her family.

  God help me.

  He leaned down and whispered her name. “Callie. Honey.” As he brushed a finger down the side of her cheek, her eyelids begin to flutter. “Hey you,” he said softly, as she opened her eyes.

  “Daddy. You’re back,” she said sleepily, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

  Justin closed his eyes as he returned the hug, savoring the moment. Once she knew, it would be the last of her innocence.

  “Did you have a good day yesterday?” Justin asked.

  She rolled over and scooted to a sitting position against the headboard.

  “Yes. Seeing Miss Patty again was great. Did you have a good trip?”

  Justin nodded, but there must have been something in his expression that alerted Callie to a different truth.

  “What’s wrong? Why do you have that sad look in your eyes?”

  Her perception was surprising – again reminding him she was on the cusp of young womanhood – no longer a child.

  “I’m not sad.” No more secrets in this family. Justin dropped his head. “I’m sorry, Callie. That’s not exactly true.”

  Callie reached for his hand. “Is it about Poppy? Did she refuse to talk to you?”

  “No, it’s not about Poppy. It’s about you.”

  All the color faded from Callie’s face. Her fingers curled around his wrist and then her voice faded with it.

  “Is it bad? Is it my health? Did the disease come back, Daddy? Am I going to die?”

  “No! No! I didn’t mean to scare you like that. In fact, it’s the exact opposite.”

  She rolled her eyes and then shoved shaky hands through her hair.

  “Oh my God, Daddy, just spit it out. Nothing can be as bad as the fright you just gave me.”

  A peace washed through him as a slow smile spread across his face. “You know what, honey? You’re right. The truth is I’m afraid because I have something to tell you about your mother and me, and I don’t know how you’re going to feel.”

  She frowned. “About you and Mother? What on earth?”

  He scooted onto the side of her bed. “Do you remember how I found out about Poppy?”

  She nodded. “Yes. You had a fight with Nana and she let it slip.”

  “That’s right. But she let something else slip that I haven’t told you yet.”

  “And it has to do with you and Mother?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why do I need to know?”

  Justin kissed the palm of her hand then cradled it against his knee.

  “Because Poppy’s mother and your mother were in the same condition when they got married, and neither Mr. Sadler nor I knew about it until just this past week.”

  Callie took a deep sudden breath, like someone had punched her in the stomach.

  “What are you saying?”

  “That your mother was also in love with another man and was going to have his baby. But he was married. To make a long story short, she needed a husband and married me.”

  The shock on her face made him sick. When she started to weep, he wanted to cry with her.

  “You’re not my Daddy? You have to be my Daddy. Please, Daddy, please. I don’t want to belong to anyone else but you.”

  Justin held out his arms. “Come here, honey. Of course I’m your Daddy. Being a daddy has nothing to do with who slept with who. That’s why Poppy doesn’t want anything to do with me just yet. She loved Mr. Sadler. He was her daddy. And you love me almost as much as I love you, which makes me your daddy, too. Legally and every way that matters, I’m all yours and you’re all mine, okay?”

  Callie crawled up into his lap, too stunned to move any further.

  “And here’s where the miracle comes in,” Justin said. “I made your Nana tell me the name of your birth father so I could find him. That’s where I went yesterday.”

  She shivered, and then covered her face with her hands. “Do I have to see him? I don’t think I need to see him.”

  “I think you’re going to want to. He’s a very nice man. When he found out about you, he cried. He kept apologizing over and over, just as I tried to do to Poppy. He kept saying, I didn’t know. I didn’t know, just like I said. And do you know what else? You have four great big good-looking brothers who are very excited about meeting you.”

  She was motionless for a few moments then slowly looked up. “Four?”

  “Yes.”

  “What does their mother think?”

  “Their mother is not in the picture. I don’t really know why, but I do know that all four of the young men still live at home. They work in their father’s business with him.”

  “They do?”

  “Yes.”

  “But that’s still not the miracle. Do you know why I went looking for him?”

  She shook her head.

  “Because they are related to you by blood, that means any one of them should be able to donate a kidney to you.”

  He saw hope in her eyes, but there was fear in her voice.

  “But they don’t know me. They won’t want to do that,” she whispered.

  “Oh honey, that’s where you’re wrong. Not only did your b
irth father immediately volunteer to be tested, but so did every one of his sons. In fact, they’re all on their way here to Saint Anne’s as we speak. Doctor Langley is going to test them all to see which one is the best match.”

  Callie’s eyes suddenly widened, and then she kept staring at his face.

  “Honey? What’s wrong? I thought you’d be happy to get a chance for a normal life again.”

  “I am, Daddy. It’s wonderful news.”

  “Then why are you looking at me like that?” He managed a smile, trying to tease her out of whatever was still upsetting her. “Do I have egg on my face?”

  “I just realized something. You didn’t have to do this.”

  Justin frowned. “I don’t know what you mean? Of course I had to do this. I’d do anything... anything to make you well.”

  But Callie kept shaking her head. “No, when Nana died, you were the only one left who knew I wasn’t really your baby. You didn’t have to tell me because I’d probably get a kidney from the transplant list before it was too late. I could have lived my whole life and never known this. Oh Daddy, you don’t even know what special thing you’ve done! This is just like the story in the bible about the two women who went to King Solomon, both claiming to be the mother of a little baby boy. The King didn’t have any way of telling who the child really belonged to, remember? So he took out his sword and said he would cut the baby in half. He was going to give half to each mother and then they would be satisfied. But the real mother, the one who loved the baby enough to give him up, begged him to stop. She was willing to give him up to keep him safe. That’s when King Solomon knew who the real mother was. She would rather lose the child than see him die.” Callie threw her arms around Justin’s neck. “Oh Daddy... you went to look for the other father especially for me! You were willing to chance losing me to keep me alive. You are the best, most wonderful daddy ever.”

  Justin knew he must be hugging her, but he couldn’t feel his arms. Surely they had turned into wings because his heart was soaring.

  ****

  Justin spent the morning with Callie, then stayed and had lunch with her just to reassure himself that there were no lingering questions she might have. The only thing she was worried about now was how she looked, which necessitated a quick call to a hair stylist who was, at the present, helping Callie wash and blow dry her hair. Justin had made a flying trip home to find a certain robe that she wanted, and stopped in a nearby pharmacy on the way back and picked up a tube of pale pink lip gloss. He had just parked and was on his way into the hospital when his cell phone rang. He paused outside beneath the breezeway and answered.

  “Justin Caulfield.”

  “Hello, Justin. This is Wade.”

  Now Justin was the one getting nervous. “Hello, Wade. How’s the day been going?”

  There was a slight chuckle in his ear. “Hectic, interesting, nerve-wracking, take your pick or all of the above.”

  “I can imagine.”

  “Uh, we’re wrapping up here now. Paul is finishing up some tests but the rest of us are through. I was wondering how it went with Callie?”

  His heart sank, knowing that this was the first real step in separating her life from his, but it couldn’t matter.

  “Better than I could have ever imagined. I think she’s torn between curiosity, fear, and an overwhelming gratitude that people who don’t even know her would be willing to go through this for her.”

  “Bless her heart, and bless yours. I want you to know we will not betray the trust you’ve given us. We only want what makes her happy and for her to be able to live a long and healthy life.”

  “Then we’re in agreement. So do I need to come find you to walk you back?”

  “No. That’s why I called. Doctor Langley said he’d personally walk all of us to her room. I just want to make sure you’re there first.”

  “I’m at the hospital and on my way to her room right now. I’ll be there waiting when you and your family arrive.”

  “Alright, then we’ll see you soon.”

  Justin dropped his phone into his pocket and lengthened his stride. Callie would definitely freak if she wasn’t properly dressed when they arrived.

  A few minutes later he knocked on the door then peeked in. She was sitting on the side of the bed, her long blonde hair hanging loose and shining around her face.

  “Hey, pretty girl. Your hair is beautiful. I’ll be it feels better, too, doesn’t it honey?”

  Callie beamed. “Yes. It feels so good. Thank you for getting the stylist to come help me wash and dry it.”

  “Here’s the robe you wanted. We need to get you in it and settled in fast. Mr. Tiller just called. It won’t be long now before Dr. Langley brings them to your room.”

  All of a sudden she was in a panic again. “Hurry Daddy. Help me.”

  He slipped it on her, pretending not to notice how thin her arms were, and how fragile she really was beneath her hospital gown.

  “Oh wow, sweetheart, how pretty you look. This blue robe is the same color blue as your eyes.”

  She beamed.

  “I brought you something else that I thought you might want.”

  “Like what?”

  He pulled the lip gloss out of his pocket. “It’s gloss, not lipstick, but it has a little tinge of color.”

  “Daddy! Thank you! I need a mirror.”

  He lifted the lid of the tray table. “There’s one underneath here, remember?”

  “Oh, right,” she said, and quickly applied a neat layer of gloss to her lips.

  Justin watched with a lump in his throat. She was growing up. God willing she would also grow old.

  Less than fifteen minutes later, there was a knock on the door and Callie’s excitement shifted south. Suddenly, she was a frightened, little girl all over again.

  “I’m right here, Callie. He’s not your daddy, but he is the man who gave you to your mother. It’s a good thing to know him.”

  And just like that, she lifted her chin. “I’m ready, Daddy. Please let them in.”

  Justin opened the door. He saw fear on Wade’s face.

  “Come in. Callie’s been waiting for you.”

  An hour later, the mood in the room had done a complete one-eighty. Callie held court like the female she was, shy one minute and then flirtatiously giggling the next, but always with an eye on where Justin was in the room. He was her anchor.

  It was obvious from the expression on Wade Tiller’s face that he had fallen in love, but he was wise enough to keep his distance. Justin couldn’t help wondering how many times today the man had thought of Deborah. Probably as many times as he’d thought of Sunny and wished he would have had the same chance with Poppy that Wade had here.

  But there was that bit about a murder. What a difference a crime made.

  ****

  After an hour, Callie began to fade and Justin saw it.

  “I hate to bring a good thing to an end, but I see someone getting tired,” he said.

  Callie made a face, but it gave her permission to sink back against the pillows.

  “Don’t worry, kid,” Hank said. “If I get to donate, not only will you get better, but you’ll be strong. I’m the strongest one in the family.”

  Paul rolled his eyes. “You better hope it’s me. It’ll raise your IQ level to the max.”

  “You’re offering to donate a kidney, not a brain,” Tommy said, which made everyone laugh.

  Wade had seen Callie fading, as well. He couldn’t imagine the hell Justin Caulfield had lived through this year, thinking this child was going to die. He stood up, wanting to hold her, but it was all too new and too soon.

  “As you can tell, there are no shy genes in the Tiller family, and your father is right. You need your rest, young lady. Thank you for receiving us with open arms. This day has been amazing in so many ways, but it’s definitely one of the best days of my life.”

  Callie sighed. “It started off scary and ended good. Thank you for caring and for he
lping me.”

  Wade glanced at Justin, then back at his child. It had taken him all hour to get to this point – to giving himself permission to even think of her that way. He saw himself in her – the white-blonde hair and blue eyes - and he saw Deborah. He’d always thought of her as the biggest mistake of his life, but no more. Whatever they’d done wrong, this child made it right.

  “No matter which one of us winds up being the lucky donor, you need to know we’re proud to have a connection to you. One day we might share more than blood, but for now what you’ve given us is enough. Rest well. We’ll be in touch.”

  “I’ll walk you to the elevator,” Justin said.

  Callie waved from the bed, and then they were gone. The room had gone from high intensity to a silence so profound that it quickly sucked her under.

  When Justin came back, she was asleep. He kissed her forehead, wrote her a note, and left to go home.

  Bravest girl in the world. Love, Daddy.

  Later, when she woke up and found it, she tucked it under her pillow for good luck.

  ****

  It was the morning of Jessup Sadler’s funeral. Coal Town was primed like a john with a hard-on. All they needed was a willing hooker and it would blow.

  Plenty of people die. Not a lot of them get murdered and even less of them murdered by a member of the city’s founding family. Everyone was curious. Did a murder victim look different than a regular dead man? According to the gossip on the streets, Coal Town was turning out to see for themselves.

  John had the heads up straight from Aaron Coulter about what was happening, and to expect standing room only at the church. Poppy was already dreading the second funeral, but to realize it was about to become a spectacle only made things worse.

  To add insult to injury, the cold front that had come through last night left some bad news behind. Right after the car from the funeral home came to pick them up, it started to snow.

  ****