Arrow to the Soul

by Lea Griffith

  “The day she was supposed to board a transport flight here, I went to meet her, but found her instead with her father at our usual meeting place in the fields. I remember the look of triumph on his face and the look of terror on hers, and I knew then—she wasn’t leaving. She ran to me and begged me to forgive her. I couldn’t understand what she needed forgiveness for, but her father helped me out with that. Aziveh had been wed the night the before to a neighboring village’s leader. Her father sold her into slavery. She was the leader’s fifth wife.

  “Her eyes when they looked at me were filled with fear and love. She told me she loved me. Her father pointed a gun at us both. Rand was there then, and he pulled me away from Aziveh. Told me I couldn’t kill the fucker because it would be murder, and the whole fucking time Aziveh was yelling for me to save her—save her from the man she’d married.”

  “You loved her?”

  He hung his head because that’s exactly what he’d thought until he’d met Saya. What he’d felt for Aziveh paled in comparison to what the woman in the bed across the room stirred in him. “Yes.”

  “Did you make a vow to her?” she asked softly.

  What the hell? Did she know everything about him? “If you ask me that, you must already know the answer,” he said through clenched teeth.

  She shrugged delicately and lust barreled through Adam. A simple shoulder shrug and he was ready to go. Fucking ridiculous. “I know the type of man you are.”

  He narrowed his gaze on her and her lips curved. “What type of man is that?”

  “A rarity. Senshi wa nijūzetsu o motte imasen. A warrior does not have a double tongue. You are a man whose honor means more than his own personal safety and comfort. You promised her you’d return, yes?”

  He nodded, unable to speak after her assertion about his character. At one time he’d thought of himself that way. Not any longer.

  “You told her you’d return, and when you did, she was not there.”

  “If you know the fucking story, why make me relive it?” Adam took refuge in anger. It was a coward’s way, but he had no discourse. She tore him wide open and was now pouring salt into the wound.

  “Did she believe you?”

  “What?” Exasperation moved through him, chasing the anger and making it burn hotter.

  “Did she believe you’d return to her?”

  “How the fuck would I know?”

  Saya cocked her head and stared at him. “It would have been in her eyes, Mr. Collins.”

  He wanted his name on her lips.

  “Her eyes would have spoken to you of her belief in your word. What did they say?”

  He rubbed a hand down his face. “Yes. She believed me.”

  Saya got up then and pressed her face to the window. Adam was reminded of her in the sun room just yesterday. Jesus, it had only been a day. “I have never made anyone’s sun brighter,” she mused aloud.

  Her words cut him. An arrow straight to his soul. He didn’t know if he could survive it. “What about their moon?”

  She looked at him then, and he knew. She was going to leave first chance she got. “I am nobody, Mr. Collins. A killer born in darkness, never to know the light. The shadow I cast blends into the black because light doesn’t touch one such as me. It skirts around me, avoiding me at all costs, because I am a light-eater…a death-bringer. I don’t bring the light. I destroy it.”

  What sifted through him then was potent, dangerous. “You will not leave,” he said harshly. He would do whatever it took to make her stay. He didn’t understand the why of it, only that it was imperative.

  She stared back out the window. “Not tonight.”

  Adam stood then and walked to her, pressing his front to her back, reaching around and palming her breasts. Her head fell back and she sighed, fingers pressing against the pane of glass. “You will not leave.”

  “It is inevitable that we all leave, Mr. Collins. The truth comes in whether or not we return.”

  Her turned her, pressed her back to the glass and lifted her legs. She wrapped them around his waist and he sank into her heat.

  “My name,” he demanded.

  “Adam,” she whispered.

  “Louder.”

  “Adam,” she yelled.

  Then he took her, roughly, against the glass, her body cocooning his as he dove into her time and time again. He looked into her eyes and the glow reflected there made her words a lie. Light reached for her and touched her the only way she let it—silently.

  Up and over they crested. He drank her sighs and she swallowed his moans. Her body received him and his gave everything he could. When he laid them down once again on the bed, he tucked her close.

  As her breathing deepened he acknowledged the truth: the moon that hugged the night sky was brighter than any sun he’d ever known.

  Chapter Twenty

  Adam’s breathing deepened, though he still held Arrow in the circle of his arms. He had given her something precious. In his arms she found pleasure…joy. He was a noble man, a righteous man. That his heart was already given did not surprise her. He spoke of Aziveh and Arrow understood there was no place in his chest for another.

  That he had taken her body was no small thing for him. Loyalty ran deep in his veins. But Arrow would forever remember their night. She would hold it close; let it be a light in the darkness and her warmth in the cold. Those were both things she’d never had and she would carry him with her always.

  But he was not for her. She watched the growing dawn touch his face, stroke over the angular planes of his face and kiss his mouth. She licked her lips, desperate for his taste once again, but slowly pulled away.

  She got off the bed with no incident. He slept on and she was glad. Her duty called, and she would stay no longer and cause this man conflict. He’d looked inside her last night, and in his eyes had been reflected her need.

  But he was not for her. He had already given his heart to another. He was not Arrow’s and never would be.

  She allowed herself a single tear. It hovered on her lid, and then fell down her cool cheek. Its hot trail reminded her that pain was her lot.

  Arrow dressed silently all in black. She pulled her hair into a tight knot at her nape, and then she stood by the bed. She wanted him, knew she always would. Strength bled from his pores, integrity shone from his eyes.

  But he was not for her. She would repeat the words as often as needed to believe them.

  So she gave a final look at the man she’d held in her body. If she had a soul, it would be staying here with him. Instead, she left her heart because she had no need for it anymore. He had taken it from her chest, made it his own. She could think of no one better to own it than Adam Collins.

  She turned, glanced around the room, and felt her mind calm. Serenity and peace were needed.

  Arrow had a job to do, and it was time.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Rand got up off the bed and walked to where she stood at the window. Bullet watched her sister walk into the dawn’s burgeoning light and look up at the window where she stood. Bullet lifted her hand to the glass. Arrow bowed her head and then turned, blending into the trees. Sorrow coated Bullet’s heart, a heart she’d not realized she had until the man at her back showed it to her.

  “She is gone,” Bullet whispered.

  “I have to find Adam,” Rand said, and urgency threaded his tone.

  She turned and faced him. “Adam is safe. Arrow is gone. Leave her where she would be.”

  Rand cupped her face and she leaned into his touch. “I can’t do that, Gretchen. You know this. We have plans and she is part of them.”

  “My sister and I have plans, too. And they did not involve Trident.”

  “Goddamn it, Gretchen,” he said, frustration leaking into his tone.

  Bullet smiled at his hesitance to show her his anger. Kid gloves he wore around her now. Touching her but never pushing for more. He was more man than she’d ever known. And what she felt for him was insa
nity.

  “Goddamn it, Rand,” she mocked. “She must do what she’s called to do.”

  His navy blue gaze narrowed on her face. “And what is that?”

  Conviction replaced her teasing. “Kill.”

  “You are mine now. As are they.” He pointed to the window she’d been staring out.

  Anger pinched her. “I was, and always be, able to protect myself, Mr. Beckett. They are the same. Did you forget who we are?”

  His gaze roved over her shaved head and he grimaced. “The proof of your ability is standing before me.”

  His words were barbed and they sank under her skin. She had not been caught. She had given herself up. For him. For his life she offered up her own, knowing the risks and accepting them. The gain far outweighing the cost.

  “You are pissing me off, Mr. Beckett.”

  He growled, low and mean. “My name is Rand, goddamn it. Use it.”

  She shifted away from him and loosened her stance.

  He raised a raven brow and snorted. “I’m not doing this with you.”

  “You haven’t been doing much of anything with me lately, Rand Goddamn It.”

  Her body warmed under his gaze. From head to toe he looked her over, and if the flare in his eyes was anything to go by, he liked what he saw. “You think you’re funny, don’t you?”

  She cocked her head and licked her lips. “No.”

  Truth. There was nothing funny in Bullet’s world. It was all pitch, full of levity.

  “Where is she going?” he asked.

  “China. Neither you, nor Adam, nor any other man in Trident will attempt to follow her. She has a goal—and it is both redemption and revenge—but also another cog in the wheel. I have told you too much already—each plan I divulge feels like a betrayal of my sisters and our goal.”

  He waved a hand between them dismissing her words. “Our goals are the same.”

  “They are and they are not. I have been waylaid from mine, but eventually, Mr. Beckett, I will enter into the fray once again. Do not forget that I am strong.”

  “How could I forget that? You nearly died for me.”

  She shrugged. “You are a good man. Good men should live forever.”

  She watched his face harden at her words. Her heart beat heavily, a wild staccato in her chest. He was hers now.

  “Your body is weaker. Do not think to go and leave on your own,” he said in a guttural voice.

  “Weak bodies can be overcome by strong minds, Mr. Beckett. This you know well.”

  His mouth lifted at the corner and she wanted to trace it with her tongue. “You turn to me in the night, Gretchen. Your body sinks into mine, your nipples harden, and your pussy gets warm against my leg. You moan when I touch you. Did you know that?”

  She inhaled, tried to let the drawing in of air soothe her. It did not. Her cheeks were hot, her pussy moist, ready.

  “I held off,” he continued, “because you’re body was broken, and though I know he didn’t violate you sexually, that bastard hurt you. I’ve not stopped wanting you, Gretchen, but I wanted you whole first.”

  In his voice was agony and her body responded to it. She stepped to him and placed a finger to his lips. “I will never be whole, Rand. But anything you do to me can only make me better.”

  Her words unleashed him and he took her mouth, licking into her with strong, bold strokes that had her gasping. Always this man moved her. He’d been as broken as her, struggling to find peace. But he saved her. When she’d been lost to herself, Rand Beckett had saved her.

  “I need you, deep inside me, making it go away,” she whispered at his lips.

  “I need to talk to Adam.” But instead of leaving, he lifted her into his arms and placed her on the bed.

  “Later,” she urged.

  “Later,” he echoed.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Adam’s eyes opened to daylight and he knew. She was gone. The air around him was no longer saturated with the scent of plum blossoms. In fact, the air seemed dead…empty. He dressed quickly, the need to follow her a pounding in his blood, a spike in his brain.

  She would place herself in danger, and by God he’d fucking be there to prevent it. It didn’t surprise him she’d skipped. Though he had yet to look for her, he recognized he wouldn’t find her.

  Saya had given him her body. Arrow had given him nothing.

  He headed to Rand’s wing and knocked on his door. Gretchen opened the door, dressed in cargo pants and a black tee.

  “Where is she going?” No preamble. This was too important and there were plans to make immediately.

  Gretchen shook her head, refusing him.

  “Tell me where she’s going, goddamn it,” he demanded roughly.

  “She is going where she’s going, and you, Mr. Collins, will not follow her,” Gretchen said firmly.

  He almost reached for her then. To do what, he didn’t know.

  “You fucking touch her and I’ll break you,” Rand growled behind her.

  He stepped back and crossed his arms over his chest. “Make her tell me, Rand. This is fucking bullshit. Saya could be in danger.”

  Panic was his friend now. Sometime between yesterday and today he’d found something infinitely valuable to him. He’d be damned if he’d let her kill herself on a suicide mission.

  Gretchen laughed, and it was a horrible sound in the silence of the morning. “She is danger, Mr. Collins. Do you forget who we are?”

  “It is different now…”

  Gretchen stepped into the hallway, fully Bullet now, the change coming over her features. She slid on the mask of killer entirely too easy. “What have you done?” she whispered.

  He met her gaze but didn’t respond.

  “Tell me she did not—”

  “Did not what?” Rand asked as he stepped between Adam and Gretchen.

  Adam still said nothing. What happened between he and Saya was private.

  “Tell me, Mr. Collins. I would know if she’s compromised,” Gretchen urged and desperation peppered her tone.

  “What did you do, Adam?” Rand demanded.

  Adam threw his friend a look and turned away from them. There were no answers here. He’d have to find his own. China—that was her destination. He, Dmitry, and Ken had been briefed on what little information Rand obtained from Gretchen. But it wasn’t enough. First Team operated under its own agenda.

  But his neck prickled and fear raced down his spine. He had to find her before she waded into warfare.

  “What did you do, Mr. Collins?” Gretchen’s voice was terrible.

  Adam kept walking. He would start with Grant Fielding. He had some chits to call in with the CIA. He’d find that motherfucker and go from there.

  “If she’s claimed you, it will destroy her.”

  He stopped then, and the devil rode his shoulders, sinking in his pitchfork spurs and digging deep. “What do you mean?”

  “She will be divided. Arrow knows the peace of unrippled water, but if you’ve managed to steal her heart, she will not be able to find that peace. She will be unhinged.”

  Adam didn’t turn, but closed his eyes tightly. Fear. He knew it now and it was painful. “You all speak in riddles. But if what you say is true, then I will have to find her first and give her my heart to replace her loss.”

  Gretchen gasped.

  Adam walked away then, down the stairs and out the door, determined to find Fielding, and through him, Saya.

  — •●• —

  “Get up, Fielding.”

  The man before him sat in a folding chair, negligently leaning back against the clapboard wall. He slowly pushed his cowboy hat up and over his eyes and stared at Adam. A small smile played about his lips. Grant Fielding was the same age as Adam, but his eyes held a knowledge Adam hoped his own never did. The CIA was full of shit if they thought Grant Fielding wasn’t a threat.

  But Adam was glad they still kept tabs on the motherfucker. It took him two days even with the information they’
d given him to track Fielding to this pit in the heart of Texas.

  “Collins, good to see you, man. What can I help you with?”

  Adam pulled a chair up and sat down in front of Fielding. This would get ugly before it got better. He rested his arms on top of the back of the chair and waited.

  “Heard you were looking for me,” Fielding said with a shrug. “Can’t imagine why though. You lose something I found?” There was that small smile again and Adam tamped down his rage.

  “Where is she?”

  Fielding cocked his head, blue eyes shrewd and knowing. Fucker. “Who?”

  “You pick up that rifle, and me and you? We’re going to fight. You know both who and what I am, Fielding. Neither of us will win but I’ll make you fucking hurt for a long time,” Adam promised him.

  “Heard about you going crazy in Bolivia,” Fielding mused as he sat the front legs of his chair down heavily. “But if you think I’m insane enough to give you that girl’s location, well, we’re going to fight and I’m okay with that.”

  “You’ll not only tell me, you’ll take me there. See, I’ve got some information I know you’ve been looking for.” Adam tossed out his bait and waited.

  Fielding didn’t even blink. His pupils didn’t flare and his breathing didn’t stutter. First rate spook, Adam thought in disgust.

  “You have nothing I need.” The other man got to his feet. “Didn’t I tell you she’d eat you alive?”

  Adam stood, as well. A fight it would be, then. He’d been needing one for a while now, and if Fielding wanted to discount the intel he had, fine by him.

  “Why do you want Arrow?” Fielding asked softly.

  “That’s none of your business,” Adam answered through clenched teeth.

  “Well, now,” Fielding said in his good-ol’ cowboy twang. “If you want one of my girls, you’re gonna have to tell me why.”

  “Your girls?”

  Fielding nodded and folded his arms across his chest. The man was as tall as Adam, a little heavier, and a straight gutter-fighter. Just like Adam. But Adam had something going for him Fielding didn’t.