After the Execution

by James Raven

  Five minutes later she emerged with two bloated plastic bags. She told me to take the wheel because the baby had woken up and was becoming increasingly distressed.

  ‘She’s hungry,’ Kate said. ‘And she needs to lie down.’

  I started the engine. ‘We’ll find a motel. There should be plenty around here. We can get out of sight and get some rest.’

  ‘Hold on a goddamn minute,’ she said. ‘Are you suggesting we share a motel room?’

  ‘We can’t drive around all night,’ I said. ‘And right now we need to stick together. I don’t know if you’ll be safe on your own.’

  ‘You’re kidding, right? No one knows I’m with you except Frank.’

  I pulled the Explorer out onto the road. ‘Don’t be so sure. Someone might have spotted you picking me up back there and got the plate number. And when Larson does raise the alarm it won’t take the Feds long to realize it was me at your house.’

  ‘But I’ll say you abducted me.’

  ‘And if they think you’re lying you’ll be in trouble. You need to stay close to me for now.’

  She stared at me with her mouth sagging open in disbelief.

  ‘Are you saying they might kill me to keep me quiet?’ I could hear the panic in her voice.

  ‘It’s possible,’ I said. ‘You saw how ruthless they were back at the house.’

  ‘This is not fair,’ she said.

  She was right and I felt another wave of guilt hit me head on.

  ‘Look, we need to get off the road sharpish,’ I said. ‘The cops will be on high alert and the car could be spotted.’

  ‘So why don’t you drop us at a hotel and go steal another car? You could be halfway across the country by morning.’

  ‘Because I intend to go back to San Antonio,’ I said. ‘So I don’t want to go far.’

  ‘Why would you do a crazy thing like that?’

  ‘I need to find out why my sister was killed,’ I said. ‘And why the Feds want me dead too. San Antonio is the obvious place to start.’

  ‘So what happens if and when you find out?’

  My grip tightened on the wheel. ‘Then someone is going to pay for what happened to Emily.’

  Another question formed on her lips but she was distracted by a shrill scream from her daughter.

  She drew a sharp breath and closed her eyes. After a heart-stopping minute, she said, ‘OK, let’s find somewhere to stay. But on one condition.’

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘You tell me what the fuck you’ve got me into.’

  I thought about it and decided to lie.

  ‘It’s a deal,’ I said.

  Kate clambered into the back seat and I concentrated on where we were going.

  Ten minutes later I spotted a small double-decker motel called the Tulip Garden. I pulled over and stopped outside the office. The parking lot was half full. I could see there was more parking at the rear of the building.

  ‘This will do,’ I said. ‘It’s not fancy, but it looks clean. You’ll need to pay in cash.’

  Kate snorted. ‘So how come you don’t have any money or credit cards? And yet you have a gun?’

  ‘It’s a long story,’ I said.

  ‘And one I’m looking forward to hearing.’

  We went in together, Kate holding little Anna who had finally stopped crying and was now in a playful mood.

  The manager was a friendly old guy with a shock of white hair and pale eyes that were rheumy under drooping lids. He didn’t seem in the least bit surprised. In fact he welcomed us with a smile and made faces at the baby who giggled in response.

  Checking in was trouble-free. We used Kate’s second name and asked for a large room with two beds and Kate paid up front in cash and showed her ID. The guy only gave it a cursory glance.

  We were able to park the car in front of the ground floor room and out of sight of the road. The room was small and basic with two double beds, an armchair, a dressing table with a TV mounted on top, and a separate bathroom with shower. There was also some coffee-making stuff. Compared to what I’d been used to it was a sultan’s palace.

  The first thing I did was slip into the bathroom to empty my bladder, which had been fit to explode for the last half hour. When I came back out Kate had taken off her coat and was sitting on one of the beds giving the baby some milk.

  I went outside and unloaded Kate’s case from the car. I left the stroller in the trunk.

  ‘There’s food and drink in the bags,’ Kate said. ‘And some toiletry things for you.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  I emptied the contents of the first bag onto the other bed. There were cans of coke, pre-packed sandwiches, some potato chips, a few candy bars, some fruit and yogurts.

  In the second bag there was a toothbrush, toothpaste, razor and shaving gel. There was also a folded grey baseball jersey with a Texas Longhorns motif on the front, and a matching cap with a large T.

  ‘That stuff didn’t come cheap,’ Kate said. ‘But I figured you needed a change of clothes. You stand out like a sore thumb in that suit.’

  Before removing the jacket I took out the gun. My fingers touched something else in the inside pocket which turned out to be a leather business card wallet. It was very light and thin, which was probably why I hadn’t realized it was there.

  I felt a tingle of excitement. I wondered if Vance had known about it. Could it have belonged to whoever wore the suit before me?

  The wallet contained seven identical letterpress cards. They were a simple non-flashy design of black words on a white background. On one side was a small scales-of-justice logo above the name Raymond Garcia, Attorney-at-Law. On the other side was an office phone number and email address.

  I went straight over to the room phone and called the number. A recorded voice informed me that the office of the Garcia and Cruz Law Firm was closed until after Thanksgiving.

  ‘What have you got there?’ Kate asked.

  ‘I’m not sure,’ I said. ‘Could be some kind of clue. I’ll check it out tomorrow.’

  I dropped the wallet on the bed and opened a can of coke. I was parched.

  ‘Do you want a drink?’ I asked.

  The baby had dropped off to sleep while drinking her milk and Kate was placing her gently on the pillows.

  ‘Yes, please,’ she said.

  I went into the bathroom and brought out two glasses. I filled them both to the brim and handed one to Kate, who was sitting on the edge of the bed. She looked exhausted, her eyes red-rimmed and bleary.

  I downed some coke, letting the bubbles blitz away in my mouth. That’s when another blast of grief hit me and an image of my sister lying on the floor with a bullet hole in her chest reared up out of nowhere.

  Tears sparked behind my eyelids and I had to sit down in the armchair to steady myself. It felt like my heart had just been kicked. I bit down hard on my lip and forced the image away by looking across at the baby. I couldn’t help feeling responsible for both that sweet little bundle and her mother. I’d got them into this mess and I didn’t want them to end up like Emily. But at the same time I wasn’t sure I knew how to protect them – or myself for that matter.

  ‘Are you all right?’ Kate asked.

  ‘Not really,’ I said. ‘What I saw tonight was too much. My sister didn’t deserve that. And I blame myself. I should have stayed away from her.’

  ‘Did she have a family – apart from you?’

  I shook my head. ‘Our parents are both dead. She was divorced. Never had children.’

  ‘How old was she?’

  ‘Thirty-five.’

  ‘A year younger than me,’ Kate said. Then she paused, before adding, ‘I’m really sorry for your loss.’

  My eyes misted. ‘I appreciate that.’

  ‘I can’t imagine what it must have been like for you in that house,’ she said. ‘What happened exactly?’

  So I told her, leaving out the bit where Emily was shocked to see her brother return from the dead. />
  When I was through, she said, ‘Isn’t it time you told me your name?’

  I spoke without thinking.

  ‘It’s Lee,’ I said, and immediately regretted it.

  She nodded. ‘So come on then, Lee. You agreed to tell me what’s going on. I’ve a right to know why I’m here.’

  So what was I supposed to tell her?

  Well it so happens that I’m a convicted murderer who is meant to be dead. Now I’m on the run and the Feds are trying to kill me.

  She was bound to freak out and become dangerously unpredictable. And I didn’t want that. I decided therefore to buy some time in order to come up with a plausible story.

  So I held up my hands and showed her the spots of blood that had dried on my palms. ‘Can it wait until after I’ve taken a shower?’

  She rolled her eyes and shook her head at the same time.

  ‘I guess it can wait a short while. But in all fairness I think you should shower after I’ve had a bath. My muscles are hurting like hell from the kicking Frank gave me. And I smell like the inside of a sock.’

  She didn’t wait for a response. She got up, grabbed some things from her case and disappeared into the bathroom. I was left alone with her baby and for some reason that made me feel a little better. Kate trusted me. It was a mystery to me why she did, but she did, and it was like a small reminder that not everything in this crazy world was bad.

  The first thing I did when I was by myself was to hide the gun under the mattress. I wasn’t quite as trusting as Kate. Then I switched on the radio and sat in the armchair to try to clear my mind. But the soft music that filled the room served only to stir the emptiness inside me.

  I sat there for maybe twenty minutes, re-living in my head all the stuff that I’d been through. The fake execution, the attempt on my life outside the restaurant, the confrontation with Frank Larson, the shoot-out which had left three people dead, including my sister. I told myself that tomorrow I’d start seeking answers to all the questions that were tormenting me. And this infused me with a sense of purpose.

  When Kate appeared again her skin was flushed from the heat of the shower. She was wearing black tracksuit bottoms and a white T-shirt. Her hair was pinned back.

  ‘It’s all yours,’ she said. ‘How’s my little girl?’

  ‘Out for the count by the look of it.’

  A wave of emotion barrelled through me. This time it had nothing to do with my plight or my sister’s death. It was engendered entirely by this single, startling moment of normality. The circumstances were irrelevant. What struck me was that I was here in this room with a woman and a child. There was background music and the scent of bath oils.

  The contrast with my previous life was beyond belief. For almost a decade I’d been alone in a grubby, smelly cell. I’d yearned for just a fleeting respite from ugliness and drudgery. A brief glimpse at something better. Something wonderfully ordinary. And here it was and I was blown away by it. But it was going to be short-lived. Just like every phase of my life that had not been pure shit.

  ‘You’d better get in the shower,’ Kate said. ‘Then I want you to tell me what kind of trouble you’ve got me into and how I can get out of it.’

  I took the toiletries she’d bought me into the bathroom. Brushed my teeth and stared at myself in the mirror. My eyes were lost inside the dark circles surrounding them. The rest of my face was the colour of dirty wax despite the self-tan.

  I stripped off and stepped into the shower. I let the water pummel my face and body for a long time. It felt good. Eventually I turned off the water, stepped out and towelled dry. I put my trousers back on and draped the towel over my shoulder, too shy to let Kate see me naked from the waist up.

  But I needn’t have worried. She was fast asleep on the bed next to her daughter. It was a relief. It meant I had more time to make up a story about myself.

  I switched off the radio and the main light and covered mother and daughter with the top sheet from my bed. I noticed a bruise on the side of Kate’s face, not far from the scar that had also been inflicted by her brutal ex. She struck me as a good woman and mother. She didn’t deserve to be treated like that. It made me wish I’d done more damage to the arrogant bastard back at the house.

  I slipped off my trousers, leaving my underpants on, and got between the scratchy sheets. The mattress was hard but I was used to that. I braced myself for a long, restless night filled with tears and painful memories.

  But once the bedside light was extinguished I went straight to sleep – fearful of what the new day would bring.

  29

  I WOKE UP early, my head pounding as if I had a migraine. I lay in the dark listening to Kate’s heavy breathing in the other bed.

  A maelstrom of thoughts stopped me from going back to sleep. My last conversation with Emily at the prison kept playing over in my head. Along with the image of her lying dead on the living room floor.

  The grief would not ebb, but at least the pain had for now lulled to a dull, persistent throb. There would hopefully be time later to mourn properly for my sister. Right now I had other priorities – like where to start my search for answers and how to extricate Kate from the predicament I’d placed her in.

  Eventually the morning light crept into the room through a gap in the curtains and started dancing on the walls. My bed was next to the window so I hauled myself up and looked outside. The new day had brought with it an angry mass of clouds. I watched them change shape as they drifted overhead towards the city centre. It looked like a storm was brewing.

  ‘Since you’re up can you make some coffee?’

  I turned, startled. Kate was peering out from beneath the sheets. I could barely see her head in the half-dark room. My first reaction was to reach for my trousers at the foot of the bed and pull them on. But I made a clumsy job of it and cursed out loud as I fell between the bed and the wall.

  Kate gave a soft chuckle. ‘Please try not to make a noise. I want Anna to sleep as long as possible.’

  I struggled to my feet, zipped up my trousers, and whispered that I was sorry. I still felt self-conscious because I was bare-chested, so I put on my new Texas Longhorns T-shirt.

  While I was making coffee Kate slipped into the bathroom. When she came out the coffee was poured and I handed her a mug. Just then, the baby woke and at once introduced an element of chaos to the morning. She crawled across the bed with a speed that astonished me. I had to lunge across the room to catch her before she fell off the edge.

  ‘That was close,’ Kate said, with a smile.

  The baby giggled and tried to poke her fingers into my eyes. She was a tiny ball of energy, and it was as though she had known me since she was born eight months ago. I was flattered and confused at the same time. I’d never had anything to do with babies and I felt awkward.

  ‘Let her have a crawl,’ Kate said. ‘She’ll be fine.’

  I lowered her delicately to the floor, fearing she might break. She looked up at me, smiled, then moved on her hands and knees across the carpet, as though daring me to follow.

  ‘I’m going to shower so you’re in charge,’ Kate said. ‘There are toys in that case over there.’

  She grabbed some clothes and dashed back into the bathroom.

  I spent the next fifteen minutes sitting on the floor trying to get little Anna to play with the toys but all she wanted to do was crawl around the room grabbing things. Keeping her out of harm’s way was enough to stop me thinking about the grim reality of my situation. Or rather our situation, because this child and her mother were in a bind too thanks to me.

  Playing with Anna made me think of Marissa and what we could have had if I’d stayed on the right side of the law. My wife had always wanted a daughter – a little girl like Anna who she could dress in pretty clothes and show off to her friends. She would have been a brilliant mom and our child would have been given all the love and attention in the world. Unlike this poor kid, whose father had wanted her killed in the womb and whose
formative years were likely to be blighted by trauma and uncertainty.

  ‘I can see that you’re not used to kids,’ Kate said when she stepped out of the bathroom. ‘You’re all flustered.’

  She was wearing faded blue jeans with horizontal slashes at the knees and a white silk blouse that clung to her curves.

  ‘She won’t keep still,’ I said. ‘I’m afraid she’s going to hurt herself.’

  Kate laughed as she rubbed her wet hair with a towel.

  ‘She’s stronger than you think. And she’s making the most of it. She’s not had much male company. I don’t think Frank ever sat down to play with her.’

  ‘That’s a shame.’

  ‘Damn right it is. But he was either too busy with his job or out drinking with his pals. And when he did come over I had to put her to bed so she didn’t see him laying into me.’

  ‘Why did you put up with it?’ I asked.

  ‘I guess I kept hoping he’d change, but he didn’t. He got worse.’

  ‘So what’s his problem?’

  She stopped rubbing her hair and pushed out her bottom lip.

  ‘Apart from not being able to control his anger he’s very resentful. And jealous. He wanted me, but not Anna. He already has two children by a previous marriage and didn’t want any more.’

  ‘But you did.’

  ‘Hell, yeah. That’s why I never told him I came off the pill.’

  She gave me a look that challenged me to be critical of what she’d done. But I said nothing.

  ‘Bathroom’s free,’ she said. ‘You go ahead and shower. When you’re done we need to talk.’

  The moment I stood up Anna reached her arms towards me and started crying. I felt my heart lift and my throat catch.

  ‘For some reason you’ve made a big impression on her,’ Kate said.

  It was a curious and not unpleasant feeling. Despite all that had happened I had somehow managed to find a new friend in this tiny bundle of mischief. Who the hell would have thought it?