Texas Grit

by Barb Han

  Ms. Strawn had lost her only son and Carrie could only imagine how horrible that must be for any mother, especially one who depended on him for pretty much everything. She could forgive his mother for her outburst and the interviews. Carrie refocused on stirring the ice cream, grateful that she was at work and had something to distract her. She had had to close the front of the shop because of reporters and curiosity seekers, but there were enough standing out-of-town delivery orders to keep her head above water. At least that part of her business was still going strong. How long would it take for news to spread and other businesses to distance themselves from her?

  The media camped out every day but seemed to have no idea that she was coming in during the middle of the night to work, and she wanted to keep it that way. Any time her mind drifted to what people must think of she wanted to give up. Why was it so important that the people of Cattle Barge accepted her?

  Because she loved this town, a little voice reminded her. Because this was the only place that had ever felt like home, the voice continued. And, the voice repeated, if she couldn’t fit in here, then where?

  Hand mixing the ice cream, having something to focus on besides all the craziness going on around her, was keeping her sane. The trick was to stir the mixture every three hours for thirty minutes as it froze.

  Carrie had slept very little her first six months of business before she could afford to hire help. Having a successful business had made her feel proud of herself for the first time. She couldn’t let that be taken from her, even though all she really wanted to do was crawl into bed and stay there. Having security control access to her home brought a sense of relief on one front. On another it made her feel like she was in prison.

  Coco had been quiet for the last twenty minutes, and Carrie had left the door to her office open so she could hear her dog in case she needed something. An animal wasn’t allowed in the food prep area due to health regulations. She had a bed in the office and another spot out front where she liked to curl up when the store was closed.

  Carrie’s new throwaway phone buzzed as she put the last of the ice cream away. She’d given her old phone to the sheriff for analysis and, even though she was innocent of doing anything wrong, it didn’t feel that way. Giving up her phone also brought a strange sense of relief. Was it all those unreturned messages from Brett that had had her on edge and feeling guilty? Dade was calling exactly when he said he would, at quarter to four in the morning.

  “How’d it go tonight?” he asked.

  “Better. I think I have everything under control again, but I need to be back early tomorrow night to keep things rolling,” she replied, not wanting to admit how much hearing his voice calmed the raging winds stalking her.

  “Ever think about taking a night off?” he asked.

  She almost blurted out, To do what? She hadn’t had much of a social life since moving to Cattle Barge. Brett had been her “get back on the horse” attempt, and look how that had turned out. Besides, she didn’t want to be seen in public. She could only imagine the rumors swirling around town about her. She had to have round-the-clock security at home to keep everyone at bay. “I might not have a choice if I can’t open my shop any time soon.”

  “I’m out back,” he said.

  She thanked him and ended the call, coaxing Coco out of bed and toward the back door. On second thought, she doubled back to make sure the front was locked, too. Recent events had her unwilling to take any chances.

  The door was locked, so she put Coco on her leash and headed out. Her gaze immediately flew to the twin headlights peering at her from the alley. Her eyes hurt looking at them, which Dade must’ve realized, because he immediately turned them off.

  Carrie saw stars. She blinked a few times before throwing her shoulder into the door and locking it.

  With no front-end sales, she would be on shaky ground very soon. She hoped everything would blow over and get back to normal before the business she loved, that she’d built from nothing, completely tanked. The shop was all she had. Admitting that made her life seem truly empty as a sense of defeat overwhelmed her.

  Don’t go there. Don’t think like that. Everything will be fine.

  But fine wasn’t a given in Carrie’s life. And darkness stalked her like cancer cells waiting for the right trigger. She glanced at the alley with a prickly feeling running down her spine. It was the sensation of being watched.

  Anger roared through her as she fisted her hand tighter around Coco’s leash. Because the feeling was just a feeling. There was no one out there watching her. And that feeling didn’t get to win today. It was probably just her frustration clouding her emotions, but the revelation felt good.

  “Did you speak to Ed today?” she asked Dade as Coco settled into her comfortable spot between them.

  “There’s nothing new to report,” Dade supplied. He’d given his statement days ago, and a deputy had collected evidence from her house.

  “I’m guessing that Nash still hasn’t turned up yet.” There’d been no sign of him in Cattle Barge as far as she could tell. If he had been the one to...cause harm to Brett...wouldn’t he be smart enough to get out of town?

  Dade shook his head.

  “What about the stuffed animal or the rose? Did they find any prints on either?” Carrie was getting short on patience as the sheriff worked through the details of her case at what felt like a snail’s pace.

  “Forensics is still working on it. That, or the sheriff’s office isn’t releasing the information to us.” He navigated onto the main road, his headlights leading the way.

  “Or anyone else. It’d be all over the news if they had.” Carrie had been avoiding coverage as much as she could. She’d bought a temporary phone at a convenience store that couldn’t be traced. News of the complaint she’d filed against Nash got out, and it seemed everyone in town was looking for him.

  There was even more reason for him to hide now. And the sheriff might never find him, considering they already knew that he didn’t have a cell phone—which was unimaginable to her in this day and age—and he seemed to have gone off the grid completely.

  Dade kept her posted when the occasional friend of Nash’s made news by giving an exclusive interview talking about how close the two had been and how this or that person had tried to help Nash battle his demons. The trail from him leaving the festival had gone cold almost immediately. It seemed that no one knew where he was and he could keep on hiding indefinitely. At least her cell phone records along with witnesses had cast suspicion about Brett’s murder away from her.

  “Ed mentioned that Nash’s employer had said the reason his foreman had decided to stay around Cattle Barge was to give them time to find him before they headed onto the next city,” Dade said.

  “And then they eventually had to leave in order to be in Nacogdoches?” she asked.

  Dade nodded.

  “I keep thinking that Nash has something to do with all this, Dade. I do. But he couldn’t have known about the stuffed whale.” She paused a beat. “What are the chances that Nash even knew Brett?”

  “There’s no way to be sure,” Dade said.

  “What if Nash decided to stick around and asked Brett for work?” Her mind was spinning with possibilities.

  “He could’ve been looking to settle down somewhere,” Dade agreed.

  “Brett had a temper. It wouldn’t have taken much to set him off, and especially if Nash was crazy enough to mention something about me,” she continued, feeling a little momentum gathering. “He said something in the alley about thinking about sticking around town. At the time, I just thought he was saying whatever came to his mind. I was so disgusted by him that all I could focus on was getting away. But now, what if?”

  What if.

  “Think Brett would’ve invited him over to his house?” Dade asked.

  “Anything’s possible, I guess.” She s
hrugged because that’s where she hit a wall. “Tyson wouldn’t have let him by that night after only one meeting. He would’ve stopped him. Tyson was trained to go after anything suspicious, and the neighbors didn’t report any barking.”

  “A stranger, even if Tyson had met him once before, would never get past him without a fight,” Dade said. “And if that’s the case, there would’ve been evidence of a struggle. Ed said the person opened up the front door and would’ve walked right past the dog.”

  “We’re right back where we started.” She released a heavy sigh.

  Dade pulled up next to her house and parked before following her inside.

  “Not exactly. Nash could still be around,” he said. “We didn’t consider that possibility.”

  The thought scared her more than anything else, but he had a point.

  “He could’ve met people and decided to stick around to party,” Dade said. “There are a few hotspots around the area for people so inclined.”

  “The old Hiller land.” She’d never gone to it when she was in high school, but she’d heard there was always alcohol flowing. The property sat between two ranches, and neither family laid claim to it. It was mostly pasture with a few trees. She’d heard of bonfires and parties. “You used to go there with...what was her name? Shaylee?”

  Dade didn’t seem thrilled that she’d brought up a girl he’d dated. She started to apologize but couldn’t figure why she’d be doing so. Surely he wasn’t embarrassed by having gone out with one of the most popular girls at their school, if not the most popular.

  His jaw muscle ticked, and it looked like it was taking great restraint not to say the first thing that came to his mind.

  Coco barked at the back door, interrupting the moment of tense silence.

  Chapter Eleven

  “You ever think about having a security system installed in your home?” Dade needed to change the subject. He didn’t like talking about his past with Carrie, especially not after the way he’d treated her back then. He couldn’t go back and change things that had happened. Moving forward, he could help her out with more security. Whatever Coco had barked at was gone by the time they checked.

  “I called the other day when everything started getting...weird, for lack of a better term. Every company I talked to said they were backed up. I couldn’t get an appointment until next month.” It made sense that everyone would be in a panic after the crime wave in Cattle Barge.

  “That’s not good enough.” Dade called Terrell Landry, head of security at the ranch, and made arrangements. He turned to Carrie after ending the call. “Someone will be here tomorrow evening to install a system.”

  “What’s it like to be able to snap your fingers and get anything you want?” There was a hint of admiration in her tone, but Dade didn’t like the implication. Because she was saying that being a Butler made his life a walk in the park compared to everyone else’s, and the truth couldn’t be further. Her comment shouldn’t grate on him like it did.

  “I’m trying to help, if you hadn’t noticed,” he countered with a little more ire than he’d planned.

  Her hands came up. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. I’ve just fought tooth and nail my whole life for what I have, and it’s all about to disappear. Everything comes so easy for you.”

  “You think it’s easy being the son of Maverick Mike Butler?” He pushed off the counter.

  “It isn’t?” The look of surprise on her face shouldn’t send fire shooting through his veins.

  Dade bit his tongue rather than say something he’d regret.

  “Stop. Don’t tell me that I’m wrong. I always thought having money would make everything so much easier. If it doesn’t, I’m not sure I want to know that just yet, considering I’ve spent my entire adult life trying to get a little of it.” She held her ground. “With all the news surrounding me and my shop, I’m afraid everything I’ve been working toward will crumble into tiny pieces.”

  How the hell was Dade supposed to stay mad at that? Dade still hadn’t figured out what his next move was going to be. Stay on the land he loved once the will was read? Or, get far away from all memories of Maverick Mike?

  “Whatever happens can be put back together,” he said.

  “Easy for you to say.” Disbelief darkened her eyes. When he really looked in them, there was something else sparkling, too. It looked a hell of a lot like desire, and that was another unproductive road.

  “You think all I need for life to click into place is a last name?” He scoffed.

  “I remember you in high school, Dade. You always had a group of people surrounding you, vying for your attention,” she countered. “It wasn’t like that for me.”

  Although he’d argue to the death that she had no idea what she was talking about when she hinted that life as a Butler was easy, she didn’t need to hear that right now. She’d had a few really bad days strung together. Her shoulders were tense, her posture aggressive, and even though this was better than the look of defeat he’d seen in her eyes one too many times, he still wanted to ease her pain. There were dark circles from lack of sleep cradling her eyes. He took a step toward her.

  Her pulse hammered, and he wasn’t sure if it was from anger, frustration or desire. He ran his thumb across the base of her neck where he could feel her heart beat. “What happened to you after you left Cattle Barge?”

  “Nothing.” She looked up at him with defiance in her eyes. Talking could be overrated when it came to digging into emotional holes. Exactly the reason Dade preferred to keep his mouth shut. But he wanted to hear it from her instead of hearing it from the grapevine.

  “Then why didn’t we talk anymore when you came back?” he pressed as a mix of shock and horror flitted across her expression.

  “Not you, too,” she said.

  “I’m your friend, Carrie. We used to tell each other everything,” he shot back.

  “I did talk.” She glared at him.

  “Not to me, you didn’t.” He stared deeper into her eyes, searching for something...desire? Permission?

  “You weren’t exactly lining up to have a conversation with me, either.”

  “I won’t deny that. I wanted to talk to you, but I never got the vibe it was okay,” he admitted.

  “We were teenagers with hormones raging through our bodies. You were Mr. Popular Jock. I was an office aide because it was just too sad to work in the library. We didn’t have anything in common once we started growing up.” There was a hint of sadness in her voice but, again, it was better than defeat.

  “I think we spent half our childhood on the tire swing. You remember that one on the playground? It seemed so huge then. Saw it the other day and it looked different,” he said, trying to break down a little of those stone walls.

  “We grew up, Dade.” All the warmth was gone from her expression now. “Our perspectives changed.”

  Damn if that wasn’t true, even if chemistry pinged between them. Pure electricity and heat pulsed from her neck to his hand. He could tell she felt it by the way she stiffened for a split second every time they stood too close or their skin grazed. Don’t get him started about the kisses they’d shared. He’d thought about those almost nonstop. So much fire. So much promise.

  So much trouble.

  She seemed intent on keeping him at arm’s length, and after his last relationship, he had no plans to get involved with someone who wasn’t into it. No matter how much his heart wanted to argue and say Carrie was exactly into it.

  Carrie looked him right in the eye and said, “We should talk about something productive, like who might’ve killed Brett.”

  Her words had the effect of a slap across the cheek, jarring him back to reality. Dade dropped his hand. “I’ll make coffee.”

  “Dade.” Her sweet voice made him want to turn around. He missed the easy way she’d made him laugh
.

  “Yeah.” He didn’t turn around to face her. Instead, he paused at the doorway.

  “I’m sorry. This whole ordeal has me turned upside down, and I’m not sure if I’m coming or going anymore,” she said. “That was really rude and you don’t deserve to be treated like that, no matter how much stress I’m under.”

  “No need to apologize.” He made quick work of the machine and produced two cups of coffee while she moved to the couch.

  “This should help,” he said.

  She took the one being offered and thanked him. She was sitting on the sofa, her left leg curled underneath her bottom, and hugging a throw pillow. “My mind just keeps going in circles. Who would want Brett gone?”

  “Who would benefit from his death?” He took a sip, remembering how it had tasted on her lips. Great one, Dade. Way to leave it alone.

  “I keep asking myself the same question.”

  His cell phone buzzed. He checked the screen. “It’s Ed.”

  “Sheriff Sawmill is requesting that Ms. Palmer voluntarily appear at the station to speak with him,” Ed said.

  “Why’s that?” Dade had no plans to walk Carrie into a trap.

  “He has a few questions. That’s all he would disclose.” Ed’s voice was even.

  “Does he plan to arrest her?” Dade asked.

  “I asked the same question. He said no.”

  “What are her options?” Dade wanted to make sure he understood the situation correctly so that he could accurately relay the information to Carrie.

  “She can refuse.” Ed’s voice was still even, and that was usually a good sign.

  “But you wouldn’t advise it,” Dade said.

  “Sheriff Sawmill gave me the impression he had news to share,” Ed supplied.

  Dade would stop short of trusting Sawmill, but he had complete faith in his attorney. “I’ll take her in. Will you be there?”