Impossibly Tongue-Tied

by Josie Brown

  Besides, if he was real, then maybe the past two months had just been a bad dream.

  She knew that wasn’t the case when he turned to her, stone-faced, and growled in a low, hoarse whisper, “How could you?”

  She couldn’t believe her ears. He was blaming her?

  Without realizing it, she’d come up beside him. Although she kept her hands clenched at her side, she really wanted to hit him, to hurt him somehow, some way, so that he could feel at least a little of the pain she’d been feeling these past few weeks.

  “You’ve got some nerve!” Heartache seethed from every word she uttered. “It wasn’t me who was screwing around, remember? I’m not the one who left to live with that—that woman!”

  “How do I know you weren’t seeing Sam all this time?” Nathan leaned in, as if daring her to slap him. “It seems awfully funny how he wanted to stay close to you, even after we separated. And now I know why. Hell, the whole world knows it!”

  “That’s what’s really got you upset, isn’t it, the thought that others will think that I was running around on you first? My God, Nathan, how selfish can you be?”

  The way he flinched told her she’d hit her mark.

  Realizing this only made her madder. All of a sudden the memories—of all the hard work, the financial struggles, the emotional and professional sacrifices she’d made over the past six years, for him!—flooded her consciousness, suffocating her in a tidal wave of pain.

  “Just when was I supposed to be carrying on this so-called affair? While I was on my feet all day, at Tommaso’s? Or was it happening when I was home with Jake, while you were spending nights with that bitch?”

  “Oh, you weren’t that lonely, Nina.” He smiled cruelly. “Don’t forget your evening job, sitting there flirting with all those guys, fluffing them up, hearing them while they…while they—”

  She slapped him. Hard.

  That shut him up.

  Oddly, though, he seemed to like pain. She could tell by the way he smiled down seductively at her, his eyes half closed but alert with passion, assessing her anger against the desire so apparent in her face.

  “Tell me the truth: Did he ever call O?”

  From the beginning she had made it a point never to discuss her many gentleman callers with Nathan—and he never once asked. He knew that the only reason she had done it in the first place was to support him while he’d struggled for bit acting gigs. Besides, he was jealous whenever another man merely glanced her way! Then again, Nina didn’t have to tell him that Sam had called O. He knew by the look on her face.

  “That son of a bitch! I’ll—I’ll kill him!”

  “You’ve got it all wrong! We didn’t meet that way at all! We met at the store, when I gave him your audition reel—”

  “My—reel? What?…When?”

  “Remember that night you met him? It happened then, that same day!”

  This stopped Nathan cold—for a moment. “Then why didn’t you tell me about it?”

  “Because—because you were so excited about having made the contact on your own that—that I thought I’d let you take the credit.”

  “Well, that certainly played right into his hands.”

  “If you’re saying that Sam planned all this, you’re crazy!”

  Nathan grabbed her by the arm. “Nina, just think about it for a moment: The only reason Sam took the reel from you in the first place was because he was trying to get into your pants. Yeah, okay, he takes a few minutes with my reel so that the next time he sees you he’ll be able to say he did it, and that he’ll keep me in mind—particularly if you play ball with him.”

  Of course, he was right. Sam had even admitted to Nina that he had agreed to look at Nathan’s tape only because he was infatuated with her.

  Nathan continued: “But then Kat walks in while he’s watching it, and she insists that I audition for Hugo. She told me so herself, told me that was when she fell in love with me.”

  Nina frowned. Well, that little revelation of Kat’s certainly scored major points with Nathan.

  “Sam only sent me up for it because Kat asked him to. She also said that Sam put me down to her, that he insisted I was too green for the role. Yeah, sure, he’s really looking out for my best interests!” Nathan grimaced. “But Kat insisted he set it up anyway. In fact, she told him that was the only way she’d do the film.”

  “You’re proud of that, aren’t you?” Nina retorted. “Gee, you don’t have much confidence in yourself. I mean, do you really think that Sam would have put you up for Hugo’s movie if he didn’t feel you had the chops for the role in the first place? Frankly, the way I see it, this proves that Sam wasn’t trying to break us up. He was trying to keep us together.”

  “Bullshit! He tried to talk her out of it because he—he’s always had a thing for her.”

  His words fell on her like hard blows. She could tell that he drew some satisfaction hurting her, in pointing out to her that she was not so desirable.

  Either to him, or to Sam.

  Not like Kat, who was desired by everyone.

  Apparently even Sam.

  “She told me that they were once hot and heavy. But she wanted to cool it with him because he was way too possessive of her—”

  “In her dreams! Trust me, Nathan, you don’t know what you’re talking about. She’s just playing you with that lie.”

  “And he’s playing you!”

  She had to admit it: In Nathan’s scenario, things would have worked out somewhat conveniently for Sam.

  Throwing Nathan within Kat’s suffocating grasp would accomplish two things: First, it would allow Sam to be in the right place at the right time to comfort Nina after Nathan’s defection.

  Most certainly, it would pique Kat’s jealousy and interest in Sam once again.

  And all this would occur at whose expense? Why, hers and Nathan’s, of course.

  Interesting.

  Watching the emotions play out in her face, he knew he had her. Triumphantly, he slammed his hand against the wall. “So I’m right, huh? Now do you get that this was all a setup?”

  “No! Of course not! I mean—well, I don’t exactly know what I mean!” Suddenly she was confused.

  How much of what had happened was fate, and how much of it was some grand scheme by one of Hollywood’s savviest players?

  Things were moving too fast for her to think. Still, if she told Nathan that she, too, suspected Sam, he’d feel justified in thinking that he’d been set up for a fall.

  For that matter, maybe he was. Then again, he certainly seemed to have enjoyed the arms into which he’d fallen.

  “Let me ask you a question, Nathan. Was it Sam who forced you to have sex with Kat?”

  He had no excuse for his cruel desertion, this they both knew.

  His shoulders sagged under both her logic and his guilt. Without thinking, he leaned into her, seeking both the physical and the emotional support he so desperately needed. Her first inclination was to shake him off, to throw him out with all her might…

  But she didn’t.

  She didn’t move at all.

  It was all so familiar, her lying there on his chest, their hearts beating in unison. He brushed her forehead with his lips. Then lovingly, with one hand, he raised her face to his and slowly, gently, lowered his lips to her own.

  She didn’t stop him.

  Of course she ached to kiss him; to have him again, inside her, mind, body, and soul. To know that he wanted her, too, just as before…

  …and not just because someone else now wanted her.

  But that’s the only reason he’s here, she thought sadly.

  She pushed him away. Then, with her head held high, she walked to the back door and opened it. “I think you need to go back to Kat now.”

  Reluctantly, he nodded. As he reached the door, he turned back. “The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you. And I’d hate to think that will happen to you again, Nina. With Sam.”

  Then he was gone
.

  Would Sam hurt her?

  She could hear Jake’s asthmatic wheeze from his bedroom. She hesitated for a moment to give herself time to place a serene smile on her face before going in to comfort him.

  When she got there, he was already sitting up and he had his inhaler on his mouth. Rubbing the sleep and tears from his eyes, he muttered groggily, “Mommy, I had a dream that Daddy came home…”

  She held him in her arms until he fell back asleep.

  16

  The Doubts

  Lavinia Hannigan was avoiding Sam’s call.

  He knew this, because he’d already put in three to her within a twenty-four-hour period. Each time she had conveniently been “in meetings.”

  In fact, everyone he’d called since the news broke that he was “pursuing other opportunities outside ICA” had been “in meetings.” Or at least they’d instructed their assistants to use that excuse if Sam called. Or they just let their cell phones roll over to voice mail after noting his number on their caller IDs.

  He knew the game. Hell, he’d played it enough.

  It had been quite some time, however, since it had been played on him.

  Which was why, the fourth time he called, he did so from Hugo’s offices, and had Hugo’s receptionist call and say that it was Hugo who was on the line.

  That certainly got Lavinia to the phone, and fast. “Hugo, darling! What can I do for you?”

  “Oh, hi, Lavinia. It’s Sam. Remember me?”

  “How could I forget you, Sam?” Ice gripped every syllable. “You’re plastered all over the tabloid news. Along with your girlfriend, Nina, the soon-to-be-former Mrs. Nathan Harte.”

  “Well, Lavinia, you said you’d prefer to represent the biggest celebrity in the case. I’d say that we’ve delivered as promised, right? Now, are you in, or are you out?”

  “You also said you’d deliver a slam dunk. I think that Nina’s little side gig is going to make that harder to do now, don’t you?” She paused and then added more gently, “Look, Sam, personally I like Nina. Hell, she was the best thing Tommaso’s had going for it. But let’s get real. Howard Cross is going to crucify her! In the public’s mind, she’s already positioned as an unfit mother. Nathan and Kat will win custody of the child hands down.”

  “So you won’t even give it a shot? You owe her that much, Lavinia.”

  By her silence, Sam could tell he’d gotten his point across.

  “I don’t do pro bono, Sam, and she can’t afford me without a settlement. You know that. And I’m assuming you can’t exactly be her knight in shining armor, since, from what I read in this morning’s Hollywood Reporter, you’ll be doing some belt-tightening, too.”

  “Don’t worry about me, Lavinia. It’s Nina and her son, Jake, who are at stake here. Look, whatever it takes, I’ll cover it. And if you do your job the way we all know you can, Nina can pay me back with some of the proceeds from the movie rights.”

  Lavinia laughed. “You certainly know how to cover all the angles, don’t you Sam?”

  “It’s what I get paid to do, Lavinia. I’ll have her in your office first thing in the morning.”

  The Superior Court of California for the County of Los Angeles wasn’t exactly as friendly as Disneyland by any means. However, as the sweet, pert receptionist assured Nina as she and Lavinia filed her Petition for Custody and Support of Minor Children, it was certainly the court’s aim to make the tearing asunder of any union first blessed with good intentions but then inevitably cursed by irreconcilable differences (not to mention an affair or two) as painless as possible.

  With that in mind, the receptionist handed Nina the court’s version of a VIP swag bag and strongly encouraged her to peruse it at her leisure. In it was:

  A pamphlet explaining all the court’s definitions, terms, and procedures as they pertained to legal separation, the nullity of marriage, filing a Summary Dissolution of Marriage, custody and visitation rights, how to petition for child support as well as spousal support, how to attain a restraining order, and what to do about civil harassment. (To Nina’s disappointment, it had nothing in it pertaining to harassment by the press.)

  A phone listing of the area’s mental health counselors. (As of that moment, Nina wasn’t contemplating suicide or murder, but with the way the media was chasing her down, she wasn’t ruling it out either.)

  The Manual of Procedure for Processing Default and Uncontested Judgments Submitted by Declaration Pursuant to Family Code Section 2336, certainly light reading by any neurotic divorcee’s standards.

  A directory of “child custody evaluators” or, as the directory so diplomatically put it, “professionals trained to assess the concerns that either parent may have about the care of the children in the home of the other parent…”

  Nina suddenly realized, right then and there, that Jake could be taken away from her.

  Forever.

  Her stomach did a flip-flop at the thought of losing her sweet little guy to Nathan and Kat. Choking down the bile that crept into her throat, she turned to Lavinia and whispered frantically, “No way, no how, am I going to let someone ‘evaluate’ me! Not with all the bad press they’re sure to have heard!”

  “Sorry, Nina, you have no choice in the matter. It’s part and parcel of how custody will be decided.” Lavinia put her hand on Nina’s shoulder. “Look, I have no doubt that once the evaluator actually meets you and sees how much Jake loves and needs you, she’ll realize that you’re not the monster the press has made you out to be.”

  “What about Kat? If she gets a hold of that woman, she’ll suck up to her and at the same time shoot me full of poison darts!”

  Lavinia smiled wryly. “Tell you what: I’ll make sure that we’re the last ones to see the evaluator. That way, whatever harm Kat and Nathan do, we’ll have a better chance of countering it.”

  Nina nodded, but she knew it would be an uphill battle.

  Last but in no way least, the receptionist added enthusiastically, if Nina really wanted to see the process from a lawyer’s perspective, then she was certainly welcome to attend the court’s annual “Family Law Walk-Through Program,” a two-and-a-half-hour informational (if less than fun-filled) tour of the court and all its proceedings, which was due to start in half an hour.

  In the politest way possible, Nina passed on this eye-opening opportunity. Instead, she headed back to Casey’s cabana house—her new hideout from the paparazzi—where she could drink appletinis and cry on her best friend’s shoulder while their sons doused each other with the arsenal of Super Soakers kept poolside.

  Marjean Higginbotham was perfectly suited for the job of child custody evaluator. A good girl who had been raised to respect her elders, never question authority, and (most importantly) pass judgment on others in anticipation that they, too, were passing judgment on her, Marjean prided herself on her ability to tell, within the first five minutes of observing a child with his parent, whether he was happily and properly situated.

  Or so she thought.

  More to the point, Marjean was perfectly suited to evaluate Howard Cross’s celebrity clientele. This the lawyer knew from having observed firsthand the timidity and awe that overcame the mousy, star-struck Marjean while in the presence of his luminous clients. These interviews invariably ended with the court-appointed evaluator shyly requesting their autograph over a most flattering picture culled from her very impressive collection of People back issues.

  Needless to say, no one dared not oblige.

  So the minute Howard heard from one of his courthouse spies—family court’s very friendly receptionist, in this case—that Nina Harte had taken the necessary steps to file for custody, he put in a call to Kat and suggested that she call the family court immediately to request Marjean as the Hartes’ evaluator.

  Kat was only too happy to make the request. Hell, she’d do anything to break Nina’s heart, and sucking up to some star-struck fan would be a piece of cake. In a voice sugar-sweet and dripping with kindness, she ask
ed Marjean if she would be her guest, that very afternoon, for petit fours and lotus blossom tea.

  For someone who devoured celebrity magazines by the carton-full each week, this was a dream come true for Marjean! She canceled the three appointments she already had scheduled, then dove through her stash of magazines for the perfect picture of Kat ’n’ Nat (their Oscar red carpet promenade in People, of course) in the hopes that she could impose on Katerina and Nathan to autograph it for her.

  Not that anyone ever turned her down…

  From the Diary of Mary Frances McLaughlin

  April 17th, 2—

  Dear Diary,

  Today, I wrote up the most difficult child custody evaluation I’ve ever done in twenty-two years!

  It concerns the case of the sweetest, cutest little boy: Jake Harte, whose father, the actor Nathan Harte, is divorcing a woman who is a phone sex operator. Pretty disgusting, huh? Of course, I consider myself a crack professional who is rarely swayed by surface evidence, and I’m proud to say that this case was no exception.

  As requested, my first stop was the father’s home. I thought I’d broach the topic of joint custody. Nathan Harte was totally open to the concept. In fact, he had nothing but kind things to say about the mother of his child…

  But then THANK GOD I’d also met with Nathan’s fiancée, that GORGEOUS and KIND Katerina McPherson. (Lucky man! What an ADORABLE couple they make!) As much as she wanted to support Nathan’s wishes, on the sly—he’d gone off to play catch with little Jakey—she filled me in as to what that Nina Harte person is REALLY like! How, after a hard day on the set, Nathan would come home to find the woman either drunk out of her gourd, or worse yet, “entertaining” men in her bedroom—while little Jakey slept in the next room! Nathan was always worried that Jake would wake up and find his mother…well, you can just imagine the rest!