Falling Into the Black

by Lauren Runow

  He lifts my ass one more time, this time, positioning himself right where I want him, instantly warming the spot that was cold with every cool breeze he’d allow in. He doesn’t push inside, though.

  I want to growl at him, but I’m panting so hard I can’t form the words.

  “You’re mine, Evangeline. This.” He slides inside me, and the sensation that flies through my body creates a moan I’ve never heard from my mouth. “You. Me.” He pulls all the way out, and I slam my hand against the bed in protest. He slides back in as he wraps his arm around me, pulling me tightly into his chest and running his hand up my neck, holding the back of my head against his face. “Are forever,” he grunts out as he pumps inside me.

  “Yes! Forever,” I scream, letting him completely take over every aspect of my body, giving in fully to him, where I always should have been.

  He pulls back out, but before I can yell at him for doing so, he moves me to my back, sliding on top of me, and kisses my lips as he slides in again, holding me tightly as he makes love to me all night long.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Carter

  “Dr. Donovan, you have a call on line two,” a nurse tells me as I walk down the hall.

  “This is Dr. Donovan,” I say after I pick up the receiver.

  “You did it,” I hear someone say, and before I can ask what they’re talking about, they continue. “We found a match for your patient at the event you put together.” I hear Kathy, the woman who helped me organize the donor drive.

  “Yes!” I cheer. “So it’s someone local then? Are they coming in?”

  “Yes, they’ve already been contacted and have agreed to go through with the procedure. And guess what? The donor works at the law firm you got to sponsor the event, so I guess you deserve the credit for finding the donor, not us.”

  Nope. Not me. Cole.

  Dammit. Is my first thought but then I shake my head. I shouldn’t feel that way. This is for Kyle. We found him a donor, and right now, that’s all that matters.

  Kathy gives me the rest of the information and tells me when I should expect the donor to come in. We hang up, and I know there’s one more thing I need to do before I go in search of Kyle and his parents.

  I pick up my cell phone and press the name of someone I’d never thought I’d call again.

  The phone rings, and just when I think it’s going to voicemail, he picks up. “Please don’t make me regret answering this phone call. You already got the girl. Don’t rub it in.”

  “I’m not. I’m calling to tell you we found a donor for Kyle from the event. Turns out it’s someone from your work.”

  “No shit?”

  “Yeah. I can’t tell you how happy I am right now.” I guess I mean more than Kyle and his donor. I owe Cole for a lot of things. No matter what just happened, he was there for me for a long time, and now that I have Evangeline back, I can truly see I was able to make it through some really bad times because of him.

  He pauses before responding, “I’m glad to hear it. Tell the little man to get better now, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  We both sit on the line, not saying a word for a few breaths when I finally speak up. “Hey, Cole. I’m, I guess I’m calling to say thank you.”

  “Any time, bro,” he says, putting my mind at ease. It may take time, but one day we could have some kind of friendship again.

  We hang up, and I turn, ready to run down the hallway to tell Kyle and his parents the good news.

  “Are we celebrating or what?” Evangeline says as she enters my place with a bottle of champagne.

  We’ve been together every night since Cole left her place after he bowed out respectfully, finally showing me the man I know he really is. I can’t blame the guy one bit, though. I’ve gone crazy over Evangeline too, so I know the blind haze he was under.

  I pick her up, swinging her around, enjoying the absolute bliss my life has become in such a short amount of time. Finally having her back is a dream come true, and finding a donor for Kyle is my cherry on top.

  “I still can’t believe it,” I admit. “I felt so helpless not being able to do anything and when I got the phone call today.” I put her down, dropping my head back in relief. “Man, it was just the best feeling ever.” I sigh with nothing but happiness creeping up my face.

  “So how did you tell his parents?”

  I laugh out loud. “You should have seen it. I ran to their room, literally falling over when I tripped on a chair that was sitting in his doorway. Of course Kyle gave me shit for it, but it was awesome to rile him right back by saying, ‘I may be a klutz, but I’m finally going to save your ass.’”

  I pause, having to take a breath before the emotions of telling them take over and tears of joy spill from my eyes. Evangeline notices my moment and wraps her arms around me, bringing her lips to mine.

  “I love you, Dr. Carter Donovan,” she says while dropping her head to my chest. “I still can’t believe I’m here. With you. Who would have thought?”

  We sit in an embrace for a moment. I question if I should bring it up but decide it’s worth it.

  “So I didn’t tell you who the actual donor was.”

  “Yeah?”

  “It was someone who works with Cole.”

  Her eyes get big. “Really?”

  “Yeah, and, I, um, called him today,” I stutter, hoping I’m making the right choice by bringing him up.

  We haven’t spoken about him, but I know she’s seen him in class. I’ll admit, I was a little nervous about her being there, but she assured me there was nothing to worry about, and after Cole’s speech, I feel like I can trust him too.

  “And…?” she asks suspiciously.

  “And, I’m glad I did.” I nod, feeling at peace with my decision to call him. She eyes me like she wants more information, so I continue, “It was short but, I don’t know, nice, I guess. I thanked him and”—I shrug—“it was like old times for that brief moment.”

  She hugs me again. “I’m so glad to hear. It still breaks my heart that you guys aren’t friends anymore.”

  I stay silent. For the first time I don’t feel the anger that I’ve felt when his name comes up and any mention of our recent past. I do miss my friend and who knows, maybe we can get over this someday.

  “I heard he’s going back to the club,” she says out of nowhere.

  I pull her back in surprise. “You guys talked about it?”

  “No. Kamii told me.”

  My eyebrows pull together in question.

  “I guess I’ve never told you about Kamii, have I?” She laughs, leaving me even more lost. “Let’s just say I was at the club as more than just a member.”

  “Huh? How?”

  “Well…the owner of the club is my boss.”

  “What?” I cough out in disbelief.

  “Yup. Believe me, I was just as shocked as you were when she told me. They asked me to join when she had a baby to be the secretive eye on the inside.”

  “So wait, you worked there?”

  “Well, I mean, not worked but just kept an eye out on things.”

  “And you kept your eye on me, didn’t you?” I pull her into me again, kissing her neck.

  “Not as much as you kept an eye on me,” she teases.

  “You got that right. You were so hot.”

  I push my body into hers, hoping she gets where I’m going, the growing urge coming on strong.

  “Do you miss it?” she asks, catching me off guard. “I mean, we are still members. We could go—”

  I interrupt her with my mouth pressing wildly to hers. “Fuck yes, we could. Knowing that you’re finally mine, at the club. Damn, Evangeline.”

  I kiss her harshly, pushing her up against the wall, having a hard time keeping my elation at bay.

  She laughs at my sudden attack. “Well, glad we’ve had this talk then.”

  I grab my mask off the table and lean in to kiss her, “I love you,” I whisper.

  “I k
now,” she deadpans back, laughing before saying, “I love you, too.”

  As we enter Club Bridge, I see Cole standing by the bar talking to a female, but his attention snaps in our direction when he sees us walk in. The uncertainty in his body language is a dead giveaway that he’s just as nervous to see us. I offer a smile and when he smiles back, his shoulders loosen slightly, allowing mine to do the same.

  I grab her hand and lead her to Cole, making sure he knows I’m okay with this. Once we’re all standing next to each other, I look in her direction and let her take the lead.

  “Hey there, handsome,” she says, smiling. “This is Warroad, and I’m Warroadess. Good to see you tonight. Can we buy you a drink?”

  Cole holds his hand out to me in a small peace offering. We shake and nod, knowing not much else needs to be said.

  He holds up his drink. “I’m good, but I appreciate the offer.”

  I look at the girl he’s already lined up for the night and slap his back. “Have fun tonight, bro.”

  He smiles, looking between Evangeline and me. “You guys, too.”

  The girl pulls on his shirt and he leaves with a shit-eating grin on his face. I lean down, placing my lips on Evangeline’s neck, even more excited to get our evening started, together at last.

  Chapter Forty

  Evangeline

  “You ready?” I say, reaching over to hold Carter’s hand before we get out of the car.

  Our eyes meet, and both of us smile, taking a deep breath as we open our doors and begin our journey to the front door of a beautiful winery that we’ve been sitting in front of for the past few minutes.

  His hand reaches for mine the second we’re close together. I can tell he’s nervous and just seeing him like this makes my heart soar even more for this man.

  We contacted Benjamin’s adoptive parents, and they were excited to have us come meet them, especially Carter. I heard a slight gasp when they heard his name, but I’m thankful they never asked questions, only focusing on all the joy we were able to bring into their lives and how amazing he is doing.

  The day was set for us to come out to the winery, but they said they wanted it to be a surprise for Benjamin. He knows he was adopted, and they said he’s talked about hopefully one day meeting his parents, especially his dad, so he’d have a clue about how big he’ll be one day.

  He’s started playing baseball, and we’re told he’s pretty good. I know Carter played when he was Little League age, so apparently the apple didn’t fall far from the tree.

  We hear the sound of a wooden bat slamming against a ball reverberate against the hills around us, and Carter’s face beams with his proud smile. “That must be him.”

  “Benjamin, I’ve told you, you can’t hit the balls into the vineyard like that,” we hear a woman call out.

  “But, Mom, it’s perfect. I have all the room in the world out here.”

  “Yeah, but how are you going to go find that ball you just hit?”

  “It was an old one. I don’t need it back.”

  She laughs. “Not the point, son.”

  We both chuckle to ourselves as Carter knocks on the door.

  Not long after, the door swings open, and the woman I remember from ten years ago smiles brightly back at me. “Angie,” she says, holding out her arms wide to me.

  “Susan, it’s great to see you again.”

  “You have no idea how great it is to see you, my dear. So this must be Carter.”

  He reaches his hand out to greet her. “Yes, it’s nice to meet you.”

  “My, my, Benjamin looks just like you. My God,” she says, placing her hand over her chest and stepping back to admire Carter for a second. “Here, come in. Roger,” she calls out. “They’re here.”

  A man steps from the kitchen with a welcoming expression on his face. “Angie, how are you?”

  His arms reach around me in a hug like we’ve known each other for years. I clear my throat, letting them know. “I’ve actually decided to change my name back to my birth name, Evangeline.”

  I smile, looking over at Carter, and he grips my hand, giving me support.

  “What a beautiful name, sweetheart, good to know. Now let me introduce you to someone just as beautiful as the two of you.”

  They open the back doors of their home, revealing a picturesque view that millions would die for. For acres and acres, all you see are rolling hills of vineyards with more of the same lining the backdrop. But right in the middle, up front stands a young boy throwing a ball high in the air and catching it with his glove.

  “Benjamin, there’s someone I’d like you to meet,” Susan announces.

  He turns to us, and instantly my eyes fill with tears. She was right. He’s the spitting image of Carter. I turn to look at Carter, and the smile on his face says it all.

  “Throw me one,” Carter yells out, letting go of my hand and stepping in front of everyone.

  Benjamin turns toward us and without missing a beat, throws the ball right to Carter, who catches it and throws it right back.

  “Nice one. What position do you play?” Carter asks.

  “League rules say we have to switch around positions but mainly first and pitcher. Do you play?”

  “I like to hit the batting cages whenever I can.”

  “Benjamin,” Susan yells out, “come here.”

  After throwing the ball one more time to Carter, he jogs the rest of the way to us.

  “Honey, I have some people I want to introduce you to.” She pauses, looking over at us.

  Carter joins me again, holding my hand as we both anticipate his reaction.

  “Benjamin, I’d like for you to meet your birth parents, Evangeline and Carter.”

  “Carter? That’s my middle name,” he says, surprised.

  We all chuckle as we wipe the wetness from our eyes. “Yes, it is, bud,” Susan replies.

  Benjamin slowly walks our way, looking at Carter and then at me. “You’re tall,” he announces to Carter, making us all laugh again.

  Susan speaks up, “He’s the tallest in his class, and he always wondered who he got it from and how tall he will be. It’s an obsession of his.”

  “Yes, I’m six-three,” Carter says with pride.

  “Did you hear that, Mom? Six-three. I’m going to be huge!”

  The laughter that fills the area is contagious. Leave it to a little boy to break the tension or the anticipation of a scary moment and make it like it’s nothing more than figuring out how tall he’ll be one day.

  Epilogue

  Evangeline

  “It’s time,” I announce, standing in the doorway of our bedroom.

  It’s been a year since we officially started dating again, and I’ve loved every minute. I didn’t know life could be so good having that special someone around since I’ve lived so long on my own, but now that I have someone to share my life with I’ll never be able to go back.

  Carter reached out to Cole the other day, missing their friendship, and I was happy to see Cole was open to at least go to the batting cages like they used to. Hopefully, that friendship is on the mend.

  We’ve also gotten to know Benjamin even more and have given his parents a date night out every once in a while so we can take him to the movies or out to a ball game. Sometimes I get sad thinking of what our lives would have been, but then I push it away, knowing our lives are exactly how they should be.

  Especially now as I go into labor with our daughter.

  “Now, like right now?” Carter jumps up frantically.

  His anxiety cracks me up, especially for someone who’s in the medical field.

  He grabs my bag, and we head to the car. I’ve been feeling some pain off and on for a while now, but with this being my second baby, I knew I had time, so I didn’t worry Carter.

  Closing my eyes, I breathe in through my nose and out my mouth when I feel Carter’s hand wrap around mine. Having him by my side for this birth makes tears roll down my face.

  I can’t
believe how far we’ve come, and the full circle we’ve created. He lifts my hand to kiss the engagement ring on my finger then turns my hand over to kiss my wrist, where I got the same infinity tattoo through my line.

  After he drops my hand, he grabs his phone and calls Benjamin’s parents on the Bluetooth through the car.

  “Carter?” Susan says excitedly, knowing why he’s calling.

  “It’s time,” he sings in the phone. “We’re heading to the hospital now.”

  I laugh at her scream of joy. “Okay, we’ll go get Ben from school. See you soon.”

  I smile, loving the idea of Benjamin being there with us. He was super excited to hear he’s going to be a big brother.

  This labor was different than my first. With Benjamin, I was in labor for fifteen hours, but our baby girl came in only four. The best part was having Carter by my side.

  A couple of times I had to laugh at his demeanor and demands to make sure I’m okay by every nurse who walked in our room.

  He was there, though, holding my hand the entire way and kissing my lips when the pain subsided. The support he gave me was more than any girl could dream of, and the look on his face when he saw his baby girl for the first time was priceless.

  There’s a swift knock on the door, and quickly Benjamin walks in without waiting for us to respond.

  “She’s here?” he practically yells as he approaches my bed with excitement.

  Carter and I both laugh as I reply, “Benjamin, I’d like for you to meet your baby sister, April.”

  “You named her after a month?” he asks.

  Carter lets out a loud laugh. “Yup. That’s the month that changed my life forever.” He leans down to kiss my forehead.

  When I think about how far we’ve come, how much we’ve been through yet here we are, all together. I look up at Susan and Roger, who are standing in the doorway and mouth thank you to them.

  Roger wraps his arm around Susan and pulls her closer as she holds her hand up to her mouth with tears rolling down her face.