Riana sighed as she shut her bedroom door. Things were getting messy, and she knew she was getting careless. She knew if she didn’t watch herself she would fall into something much too complicated. Things were rough with Ryan and she sensed things were developing for Alex. She had never been one to be unfaithful and she knew she owed it to everyone involved to sort out her relationship with Ryan before she felt like she was leading Alex on. Alex deserved better. She huffed and thought he might have even deserved better than her.
“Good morning Ri!” Derek greeted as she walked into the dining room. She smiled at him and found a seat at the table. She made a point to take the open chair next to Sam rather than the one next to Alex. She had to try to distance herself a bit. She thought it might help her refocus. She caught the disappointment in Alex’s face and frowned. She didn’t want to upset him, but he had to know things were too complicated.
“Riana!” Spencer squealed. “We’re going to see ponies after this right?” His face was lit up with a smile unlike any other Riana had ever seen.
“Shortly after, yes.” Spencer’s smile fell. “Don’t worry Spencer, I’ll eat quickly and get ready super-fast.” He brightened back up and nodded quickly. Riana noticed Tabitha remained quiet as she thoughtfully observed the interaction between Riana and Spencer.
They sat around the table, chatted happily through breakfast and made plans for the day. It was decided they wouldn’t make Spencer wait any longer for the horses. “Alright, I’m going to go shower and get dressed. Matt, make sure Spencer gets changed into jeans and I’ll meet you at the guest house.” Riana directed as she cleared dishes from the table.
Matthew and Tabitha got Spencer changed quickly then waited outside. They sat on the front porch of the guest house as Spencer played with Riana’s two dogs in the yard. Matthew held Tabitha’s hand lovingly in his. “You know I love you Tabs.”
She turned and smiled at Matthew. “Of course I do.”
“I don’t want this stuff with Alex--”
“The stuff with Alex is… my stuff with Alex. You know I love him too. But Kim is my best friend, it’s hard to be here… watching him be so okay without her.” She admitted softly. “I feel like… If I don’t stay angry, I’m betraying Kim. She’d hate me if she knew I somehow ended up liking Riana.”
“You have free will Tabitha.” Matthew reminded gently. “You can like or dislike anyone you choose. You shouldn’t allow others to dictate that. Not even me.” He nudged her and smiled. “As much as I’d like for you to like Ri, or at least to see she’s not evil, I can’t control how you feel. But... neither should Kim.” Tabitha looked out at Spencer as she pondered his words.
Tabitha’s attention was drawn away from Spencer to sounds of laughter. Matthew and Tabitha couldn’t make out anything being said, but the looks of pure joy on everyone’s faces was obvious as they left the main house. Alex seemed to be picking on Ri. She put her hands up and shook her head but after some prompting from the others she seemed to relent. They stopped their advancement towards the guest house and Alex moved in front of Ri. She laughed as he bent down and she hopped on his back. Ri turned and pointed at Derek and Lexi as she continued to laugh. Lexi laughed and rolled her eyes but nodded, then Derek also bent down and Lexi hopped on his back. Some provocation took place between Alex and Derek as Sam moved ahead of them.
Matthew chuckled as he realized what was about to take place. Samantha held her hands out and yelled, “Ready! Set! GO!”
Derek and Alex took off in a run, Lexi and Riana squealed through their laughter. Matt glanced over and saw Tabitha smile, just a little, as she too watched the race. Matt couldn’t imagine Tabitha was unable to see the pure happiness on Alex’s face. She had to realize she was happier now.
Riana relentlessly teased and provoked Derek as Alex took the lead. Lexi urged Derek on, “Go D! Run!! You almost got him!” In the end it was Alex who took the win as they got to the front of the guest house.
“I told you!” Alex laughed as Riana slid down off his back. He slung his arm over her shoulders and grinned proudly.
“Yeah, whatever.” Derek laughed as he released Lexi to the ground.
“Riana!!” Spencer yelled. Riana happily laughed as she turned around towards Spencer, well aware of what was coming. He got in front of her and danced around excitedly. “Can we see the ponies?”
Riana looked over towards Matthew and Tabitha. Matt gave a small nod. “Yes, Spencer, we can go see the ponies now.” She smiled. Spencer turned, ran to the house, and clomped up the wooden steps of the porch.
“Mom! Dad! Come on! We can see ponies now!” He squealed as they stood up. He grabbed both of their hands, pulled them down the stairs and to where Riana, Alex, Sam, Lexi and Derek waited. As they approached, Spencer let go of their hands and ran up between Alex and Riana. He reached up, took both of their hands, and danced happily between them. Tabitha’s smile fell, her heart tightened as she watched Spencer quickly treat Riana the way he used to treat Kim.
Riana was both happy and nervous to have Spencer take such a liking to her so quickly. The way she spun her vertical labret told Alex her anxiety was a bit high. When she glanced over at Alex he gave her a soft smile. She finally released the barbell and smiled back. “How many do you have Ri?” Spencer implored.
“There are ten horses and two ponies.” Riana answered simply. They got to the barn door and Riana released Spencer’s hand as she pushed the heavy door to the side. They were quickly greeted with deep snorts and neighs. Riana stepped to the side to wait for everyone to get inside before she walked over to the first stall.
“I can’t see!” Spencer whined.
“Spencer.” Tabitha warned sternly. She never tolerated whining from him.
“Sorry mommy. Daddy can you pick me up?” Spencer requested as he stood in front of Matthew. Matt smiled and scooped him up, then walked closer to the stall.
“This is Adonis.” Riana smiled. Adonis had his head over her shoulder and gave her what looked to be a hug as she rubbed his neck. “He’s my favorite boy, but don’t tell the others.” She laughed and winked at Spencer. “You can pet him.” She urged. “He’s a big boy, but very sweet.” Spencer grinned as he touched Adonis’ velvet nose.
Riana moved to the stall next to Adonis and smiled at Alex. “This is Apollo. He’s Adonis’ best friend.” Spencer happily reached in to pet Adonis as well. Tabitha smiled and clicked pictures as she watched Spencer. Riana continued down the aisle and introduced Spencer and Tabitha to Aphrodite, Sebastian, MaTao, and Sonny. “Sonny is one of the sweetest horses I have. Your daddy rode Sonny the other day. What do you say, you want your dad to ride with you today?” Spencer quickly nodded. “Lexi, could you take Sonny and tack her up please?”
“Of course.” Lexi obliged as she opened up Sonny’s stall door. Derek quickly offered his assistance as he followed Lexi. Alex caught Matthew’s eye and grinned.
“I have a few more outside in the pasture, want to meet them too?” Spencer nodded as he twisted his small hands together excitedly. Matt, Tabitha, Spencer, Alex and Sam followed Riana as Lexi and Derek hooked Sonny up to the wall to be tacked. Riana stopped near them, grabbed a bucket and dumped treats into it.
As they got outside Samantha skipped ahead, hopped up on the fence and gave a high whistle. Lilo’s head lifted up and she began a quick trot to the fence. Chester, Ringo, Daisy and two ponies followed. “Thanks Sam.” Riana laughed. Riana pulled a treat from the bucket and offered it to Lilo. “This is Lilo, the brown one coming up with the blue halter is Chester…” She opened her hand with a treat in her palm to Chester.
“Daisy is a little shy, but she’s the shorter, dark brown one.” She explained as she pointed to just beyond Chester. “And Ringo is my goofy looking boy.” She laughed as she rubbed his large ear and gave him a treat.
“And the ponies!” Spencer chirped.
“Yes, Spence, here come the ponies.” Alex confirmed.
“This is Sugar and Spice.
” Riana introduced.
“The white one must be Sugar.” Spencer said proudly. Riana giggled.
“Actually, no.” Alex laughed and shook his head. Leave it to Riana to go against logic. “Spice is the white one. Sugar is the brown one.” She laughed some more. “Don’t ask me why.”
Spencer gave her a small scowl. “That’s silly.”
“Spencer, that’s not nice.” Matthew chided.
“No, it’s okay Matt, he’s absolutely right. It is silly.” Riana smiled. She grabbed a couple of treats from the bucket. “Spence, would you like to give Sugar and Spice a couple of treats?” Matthew placed Spencer on the ground and he jogged over to Riana’s side. She placed one treat in each small hand and directed him on how to open his hand flat to present the treat to the pony. As Sugar moved his lips over Spencer’s hand to gather the treat, Spencer giggled. Tabitha took more pictures and smiled happily at Spencer’s joy. “So which pony would you like to ride Spencer?” Riana asked as she easily climbed over the fence.
“Sugar!” Spencer called delightedly. Riana stepped off the fence, grabbed Sugar’s halter and led him to the gate.
“You got it mister.” She laughed.
Chapter Seventeen
Lips Of An Angel
As Riana had the rest of the group outside, Lexi and Derek remained behind to tack up Sonny. Lexi went to pull down Sonny’s saddle but huffed when she realized Dustin put it on the peg above where it usually hung. “Let me get that shorty.” Derek laughed. Lexi pushed him playfully in the shoulder. He lifted the saddle off the peg and made his way to Sonny. “You got a saddle pad?” Lexi hurriedly grabbed a pad. Heavy dust infiltrated the hot, still air of the barn as the blanket came to rest on Sonny's back. They continued to work on Sonny, occasionally Derek’s hand would brush Lexi’s or he’d bump into her as they worked around the horse. Lexi would laugh lightly and try to keep the blush off her face.
“You think Tabitha is going to really give Riana a chance?” Lexi asked quietly.
Derek skewed his lip. “It’s hard to say. Sometimes it looks like she’s making progress, other times I’m just waiting for the explosion, you know?” Lexi nodded in agreement. “Matt told me Tabs is pretty angry yet, but he’s working on her. Trying to help her see it’s not Ri’s fault.” Lexi stood on the other side of Sonny and watched Derek. “It’d be a damn shame if we can’t all work through this.”
“Oh yeah?” Lexi asked, her interest piqued. “Why’s that?”
Derek grinned at her quickly then turned his attention to Sonny as he rubbed his hand down her golden neck. “Well...I’m pretty sure we all have this plan... to keep you ladies around for a long time. And it would just suck... if it was going to be tense every time we got together.”
Lexi smiled. “You have a point.” she teased with a wink. “Let’s get Sonny out there.” She said as she walked around Sonny and gathered her reins.
As they headed towards the barn door Riana and Alex approached with Sugar. “We’ll be right there.” Riana assured with a smile. Derek nodded.
Lexi and Derek brought Sonny outside and over to Matthew. “Here’s your lady Matt.” Lexi offered.
“Thanks Lex.” He grabbed the reins from her hand and slung them over Sonny’s neck.
“Don’t hurt yourself.” Tabitha teased. Lexi tried to hold back the laughter but was unable. Matthew turned to his wife and childishly stuck out his tongue.
“His gracefulness really is astounding isn’t it?” Lexi laughed. Tabitha chuckled along with her.
“You’ve noticed, I take it?” She giggled but looked at Matthew with nothing but love. Her eyes softened with amusement and joy. Matt’s eyes held the same amount of adoration when he gazed at her. Fans had often doubted their relationship, but it was obvious to Lexi and Sam the doubts were unfounded and likely fueled by jealousy. Matthew and Tabitha were pretty much perfect together.
Riana and Alex exited the barn with Sugar in tow. Samantha beamed at how happy Riana looked as she walked along side Alex. “Spencer!” Alex called. “Come on cowboy, come get your pony!” Spencer ran towards Riana and Alex. When reached them and Riana took his hand and led him around Sugar. She explained all of the tack to him; his bridle, saddle, the stirrups, and the horn. She made sure Spencer knew why every part was important and how they all worked together to ride properly.
“You think you’re ready to take him for a ride?” She questioned with a smile. Spencer nodded and excitedly bit his lip. Riana grabbed Spencer by his little waist and hoisted him into Sugar’s saddle. Tabitha busily took pictures again with a proud smile. Riana adjusted Spencer’s feet in the stirrups and showed him how to hold the reins. Alex stood in front of Sugar and watched them. Riana blushed lightly under his gaze.
Riana led Spencer and Sugar through the gate to the corral where Matthew and Sonny waited. “Make sure you’re holding on!” Tabitha urged nervously.
“Riana will make sure he doesn’t fall.” Alex commented as he continued to gaze at Riana softly. Tabitha looked over at him with pursed lips and sighed.
Alex continued to watch Riana and contemplated what kind of mother she might make. He rationalized he wasn’t actually thinking of having children with her. He just loved how Riana smiled at Spencer, and how they laughed together. He admired her patience with Spence and how she consistently watched to make sure he was safe. Alex noticed Tabitha seemed torn between having fun and trying to stay angry at Riana. He scowled and wished she would just get over it.
Alex moved back and leaned against the fence next to where Sam was perched on the top rail. Samantha draped her arm around Alex’s neck. “How’s it going, dear?”
Alex took a deep breath. “It’s going.” He turned and looked up at her.
“Need to talk?” She pushed with a sweet smile. Alex pondered for a moment. There was a chance that if he talked about things it might make it worse, but he thought perhaps talking to someone who actually knew what was going on would at least help him feel less isolated in his emotions. He nodded silently. Sam hopped off the fence and Alex climbed up and over as well. “We’ll be back.” Sam assured Lexi and Derek.
Sam and Alex meandered back towards the barn. “I don’t even know where to start, Sam.” He began. “All my logic seems to be slipping away. I can’t keep my eyes off her, I can’t stop myself for savoring every moment she touches me.” Samantha nodded next to him. They entered the dusty, hot barn and sat down next to Adonis’ stall. “I feel like... Like I know she must know. It has to be pretty obvious huh?” He laughed a bit as he avoided Sam’s gaze.
“Well, there’s assumptions being made for sure.” Samantha confirmed with a wink. “Probably not by Riana though. In fact, I could almost guarantee she thinks you’d never look at her that way, or feel that way about her.”
“Wha--Why? How could she not know?” Alex was dumbfounded.
“Well, you know, she’s used to Ryan.” Alex fought to contain a growl. “She doesn’t know what it
looks like, to have a man truly care about her. He used to be good for her Alex, and she can’t let go of that. Even though it’s so obvious to the rest of us he’s just using her now… she still sees it as love.”
Alex sighed and stared at the cement floor; waves of dirt and bedding created smooth patterns before him. “She came to me last night.” He paused as he remembered the moment. “She had a bad dream and said she needed me.”
“She does need you, Alex. More than I think you know.” Samantha said softly as she wrapped her arm around him.
“I don’t know how much longer I can keep it a secret, Sam.” Alex confessed as he aimlessly picked at the bale of hay they sat on.
Sam pulled him into a side hug. “I know Alex, but it’s better for her this way.” Alex nodded. He knew Sam was right, he knew Riana couldn’t know how he really felt about her yet. If she couldn’t see it, he couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t force her to make a decision she wasn’t ready to make.
“You love her don’t you?” A
cold, even voice assumed from the entrance of the barn.
Alex narrowed his eyes as he turned his gaze to Tabitha. “That’s none of your business Tabitha.” He retorted in a low, threatening tone.
“I think it is Alexander.” Tabitha snapped sternly as she approached Alex and Samantha. “I want to know how you could claim to love Kim and then just callously toss her to the side once she came along.”
“Leave it alone Tabitha.” Alex warned. Samantha slowly got up and inched away.
Tabitha shook her head. “I won’t Alex. I can’t. Not after I stayed with Kim for days as she fell apart. I can’t stand to see you… and… and how you don’t even care!” Tabitha finally raised her voice as she stood over Alex. “I can’t… I just can’t understand!” Her eyes filled with a mixture of anger and pain.
“You don’t have to understand!” Alex yelled as he stood up and towered over Tabitha. Alex glared down at her, “I loved Kim. I still love her--”
“Then why aren’t you still with her?” Tabitha screamed. The horses paced nervously in their stalls.
Alex took a deep breath. “I was never in love with her.” He confessed simply.
“Bullshit!” She bellowed. “I can’t believe you.” She growled. “I can’t fucking believe you!” She shrieked again as she pushed Alex back. “So what then?” She spat. “Now you’re in love with someone you barely know?!”
“What the hell is going on in here?” Riana’s authoritative voice echoed off the walls as she stormed into the scene. The horses snorted and danced around in their stalls anxiously.
Tabitha turned to Ri. “Nothing.” She snapped, then turned her fiery gaze back to Alex.
Riana raised an eyebrow as she approached. Her boots scrapped along the floor, dust followed in her wake. Alex’s heart swelled as he watched her, the intensity of her confidence alluring. “Really?” Riana asked condescendingly. “Because it definitely looks like something.” Riana’s typically playful blue eyes were icy as she scrutinized Tabitha. Tabitha had a good four inches on Riana but it appeared that didn’t matter as Riana continued her approach.
Disillusioned Love Page 17