Cricket Cove

by Haddix, T. L.

  “I’d love to go for a long ride today, but it’s just too cold, buddy. As soon as it warms up, though, you and I will go out for the day.”

  Once he was unsaddled and taken care of, she hurried into the house with the mail. “Nonny, it’s so cold out there I think Charlie needed a coat. Brrrr!” She handed her grandmother the stack of mail and started the process of unwrapping herself from the layers of clothing she’d worn to stay warm.

  “I don’t miss Georgia that much these days, except in the dead of winter,” Eliza admitted. “Days like this I’d be happy to be back down in Savannah. You have quite a few letters here, young lady. Looks like someone misses you.”

  Amelia accepted the envelopes. “Aww, look at this. A letter from Noah, one from Eli, and one from Archer. I’ll bet this one has a note from Sydney inside, if the thickness is any indication.” She held up the envelope and Eliza smiled. “Who’s this from, though?”

  The stationery was nice but not flashy, and the handwriting across the front was bold, slanted to the right a little. The missive was thick, whoever it was from. When she flipped the envelope over and saw the return address, she could hardly believe it.

  “Amelia? Is there a problem?”

  She shook her head. “No. It’s just… it’s a letter from Logan. I wasn’t expecting that.”

  Eliza stood beside her and looked at the envelope, then up at Amelia. Her gaze was filled with speculation. “What do you think he wants?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I didn’t think the two of you could be called anything close enough to friends to justify being pen pals,” Eliza commented as she went back to the stove to check on the casserole in the oven. “This is almost ready. Will you let Eli know?”

  “Of course. And we’re not friends, not exactly. It’s complicated. I’ll be right back.” She went down the hall to the study and let Eli know lunch was ready, then took the mail upstairs. The temptation to open Logan’s letter then and there was strong, but she resisted. As soon as she got a chance, though, she’d sit down and see just what he had to say.

  To her frustration, that chance didn’t come for some time. They’d just finished lunch when there was a knock at the back door and Caleb came in.

  “Well, would you look at this? You come to town and don’t even tell your old friend you’re here. I see how it is,” he teased as he hugged her. “What brings you here?”

  “That’s a little complicated. Let’s just say I came for a visit, and I’ll be here a while, and leave it at that for now.”

  He kept an eye on her as he kicked off his boots and set them in the corner. “That’s not mysterious at all.”

  Amelia shrugged. “A girl has to be mysterious from time to time.”

  Though she knew he’d pester her about it later, he let the answer ride for now. “Well, whatever the reason, it’s good to see you.”

  Eliza made him sit down and eat, as he’d just come off his shift at the veterinary clinic. From the way he devoured his food, Amelia gathered home-cooked meals weren’t something Caleb got very often. He noticed her amused smile and shrugged.

  “What? It’s good.”

  “I know. You need to get married, you know. Then you could get a nice, hot meal every evening.”

  Caleb grinned at her. “You offering?”

  She rolled her eyes, laughing at him. “No. But I think I’ll move you to the top of my matchmaking list.”

  That wiped the amusement from his face fast enough. His scowl could hold up against one of Logan’s. “I’m never getting married.”

  Amelia just raised an eyebrow and looked to Eliza. “Nonny, didn’t you say there was a sweet little girl who just started working at the clinic?”

  Eliza smiled into her coffee. “I did. Brooke is her name. She’s Judge Harrison’s daughter.”

  “Judge Harrison’s only daughter,” Caleb put in. “And don’t you get any ideas in your head, Nonny, Amelia. She’s strictly off-limits. She’s a permanent kind of girl. Too good for the likes of me. I like my women a little wicked.” Though he winked at them as he stood and took his plate to the sink to rinse, Amelia wondered. There was something wistful about the way he’d said that.

  Eliza nodded at Eli subtly, and Amelia watched as he winked back at her. She chuckled softly. “This should be fun.”

  Caleb turned. “What?”

  “Oh, nothing. Just thinking out loud. So what are you doing today?”

  “I brought some wormer out for the horses. Pop, do you want to give it to them today or wait until it’s warmer?”

  Eli got to his feet and stretched. “Today’s as good a day as any. The barn’s warm enough. Pip, you want to come along?”

  Amelia bit her lip. “Um, not this time, unless you need me. I got some letters from home, and I’d like to read them.”

  He waved a hand. “Then you go do that. Caleb and I are perfectly capable of handling it.”

  “Yeah, but I was hoping you’d come out and we could chat,” Caleb said, holding his hand to his chest as though injured. “I mean, who knows when we’ll get time to visit again?”

  “We’ll get plenty time to visit, silly. I’ll be here for a while.”

  He narrowed his eyes and looked down his nose. “How long is a while?”

  “A few weeks is the plan.”

  “Really? That’s a long visit.” The speculation in his gaze grew. “Are you okay?”

  “She’s fine. And she probably doesn’t want to be interrogated right this second.” Eli clapped him on the shoulder. “Come on. Let’s see to the horses.”

  Amelia sent him a grateful smile. “We’ll get together one night this week, Caleb. I promise. Okay?”

  “I’ll hold you to that.”

  “I’ll look forward to it.” As soon as they left, she stood. Eliza’s knowing smile made her shuffle her feet. “What?”

  “Nothing. Not a thing. But Logan’s awfully handsome, and that was a thick letter.”

  “Nonny!”

  Eliza smiled, and the hint of wickedness she saw reminded Amelia of Emma. “Am I wrong? I may be old, and he may be young enough to be my grandson, but I’m not dead, and I do have eyes in this old head.”

  Amelia huffed out a sigh. “No, you aren’t wrong. He’s very handsome. To be honest, I’d kidnap him and keep him naked in my trailer if I could. But then he’d open his mouth, and we’d get into an argument, and I’d kick him out the door.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “I don’t understand the man. He blows hot and cold. It’s very frustrating.”

  Eliza hugged her. “Maybe you need to figure out how to turn the cold off and leave the hot on.”

  With a helpless laugh, Amelia left the kitchen. “Nonny, you have no idea how tempting that sounds. Just holler if you need me.”

  Upstairs, she settled in on the window seat with the letters in her lap. She made herself open all the other correspondence first. The letters from Sydney and her nephews caused a pang of homesickness, but she pushed it down. She set them aside to answer later and stared down at the still-sealed envelope from Logan.

  “What do you want, I wonder?” She brought it up to her nose and when she caught a whiff of his cologne, she closed her eyes. Whatever scent he wore was warm, a little spicy, with a hint of pine. It reminded her of leaves in the fall and crisp mountain air, and she could happily wallow in it for hours. Preferably in a bed with him in it.

  “Why do you do this to yourself, Amelia?” she whispered. “There’s no point to it. You’re being ridiculous and pathetic, wanting a man so desperately who thinks so little of you.”

  She opened the letter, hoping whatever the contents were that they would help her build a thick wall against Logan’s attractiveness.

  Dear Amelia,

  I hope it’s oka
y that I’m writing you. I found the address on the Christmas card Eliza sent. Archer told me you’d gone to London for a while. I think that’s probably a good idea.

  I wanted to let you know that I didn’t sneak out as soon as you were asleep the other night. I didn’t leave until it was light out. I didn’t want to disturb you, so I slipped out. It didn’t occur to me until later that you might think I’d left in the middle of the night.

  I also wanted to apologize to you. I’ve not done that yet. I haven’t known how to. I know you said we needed to let what I said that day in the barn stay in the past, but it’s weighing on me heavily. I can’t ignore it.

  I don’t believe anything I said that day. I haven’t for a while. What I spouted off that day was more a… It was what I told myself to keep you at arm’s length. There’s no way to admit this without revealing more than I want to, but given how badly I hurt you, my own feelings are inconsequential.

  You’re a threat to my equilibrium. You’re too appealing. I don’t know how to handle that, and the confusion I feel around you scares me. I don’t want a relationship, and you’re not the kind of woman who does casual flings. I knew that from the start. So I struck out. I just never expected to find out that my strike had landed a blow. I never intended that.

  Amelia had to stop reading, and she drew in a shaky breath. She pressed the letter to her abdomen with a shaking hand and tried to slow her racing heart down enough to breathe.

  “Oh, my God. You son of a bitch, you can’t be serious.” He was attracted to her. He’d torn her apart because he was attracted to her and didn’t know how to handle it. If Logan had been standing in front of her just then, she would have slapped him. When her anger was under control, she continued reading.

  You were not what I was expecting to find when I came to Kentucky. I had a picture in my head of you, formed from seeing you through Archer’s eyes over the years in letters and in conversation. Suffice it to say, I do not see you the way my brother does. So I didn’t react well. I hurt you. And I’m sorry. More sorry than I can find the words to express.

  If I could go back and start over again with you, I would. I don’t expect us to ever be friends, really, not the way I treated you. But I hope that you won’t hate me for being an idiot, and I hope you can forgive me someday.

  As I said earlier, I think you going away for a while is the best option you have right now. I’ll be honest, part of the reason I’m glad you’re away from Hazard is pure self-preservation. But I’m relieved that you’re safe most of all.

  You’re probably feeling guilty about leaving Lori to her own devices. Don’t. You’ve done everything you can to help your friend. She’s made her choice, and she’s the one who has to take the next steps to get out of that situation.

  Archer and I are probably going to go out this weekend and keep an eye on Roger. Just to see what he does, nothing more. Though I won’t lie and say the temptation to beat the shit out of him isn’t there. Men should protect women, not abuse them. Even as far gone as our father was, that was a lesson he drilled into us. Real men just don’t do what he’s done. Someone needs to teach Roger that lesson.

  On to less stressful things that you probably have no interest in reading about, but I don’t know how to close this letter so I’ll keep writing.

  Work was interesting this week. I’m now prepared to meet my students for the first time, class schedules are laid out, ditto lesson plans. New software is installed for the most part. Shutting down due to the flu hurt us this week, but it was only odds and ends for the most part. Classes start next week.

  I don’t know what to think about being a teacher. I guess it’s not going to be all that different from training raw recruits, which was part of what I did in the Army. I just can’t yell at these kids the way I had to do sometimes there, or make them drop and give me fifty push-ups. So I’m not sure what I’ll come up with in the way of discipline. Flogging? Running around the building ten times?

  Amelia couldn’t help but laugh. “Oh, this is going to be fun to watch,” she murmured. She could imagine him running his hands through his hair, frustrated, trying to figure out how to react to insubordination. She wasn’t sure if he was serious or not, but just picturing Logan’s fierce scowl as a student did something out of turn, then leveling the punishment on the hapless kid, had her holding her stomach with the giggles. Once they died down, she finished the rest of the letter.

  I’ll close for now. You don’t have to write me back unless you want to. Please don’t feel obligated. Writing letters is something I got in the habit of doing in the military, and it’s something that I still do late at night when I can’t sleep. So let me know if you don’t want me to write you again, or I might get a wild hair and repeat this venture.

  Take care of yourself down there in London.

  With regards,

  Logan.

  Amelia folded the letter carefully. She wasn’t sure what to think, so she put the letter in the stack with the rest of the correspondence and tucked it all in a drawer. She’d let it sit for a while and come back to it later. For right now she was going to go downstairs and spend some time with her grandmother. She’d leave answering him or not up to how she felt later.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Logan swung by the post office Monday evening after work. When he saw the letter on the top of the pile of mail, his heart stuttered. He recognized the handwriting as Amelia’s. Sure enough, when he checked the return address, it showed London.

  “That was fast.” He estimated that she would have received his letter Saturday. She must have responded and written back that very day. Logan wasn’t sure if that was good or bad.

  He had to stop at the grocery store after work and he hurried through the aisles, eager to get home so he could read the letter. He picked up some ready-to-eat food from the deli, and as soon as he was finished with that, settled in on the couch to see what her response was. He was half-afraid to learn, but being meek had never gotten him anywhere, so he opened the letter.

  Logan,

  I was a bit surprised to receive your letter, I have to say. And I’m still torn as to how to respond. Part of me wants to tell you to take a long walk off a short pier, but part of me also realizes it couldn’t have been easy for you to put pen to paper and admit what you did, although I’m not sure which of you I believe—the man who was spouting off in the barn or the man who apologized so nicely. So for now I think our truce can continue. That’s as much as I can promise.

  As to me wondering if you’d left in the middle of the night, no. I was awake when you left. You’ve done that before, unless I miss my guess. You were too good at it. Tsk, tsk, tsk. I shall henceforth call you Casanova.

  Logan was surprised to find his face heating with embarrassment, and he shook his head, chagrined. No matter how he looked at it, slipping out as he had did not reflect well on him. Amelia’s teasing notwithstanding, he read between the lines and saw the lecture contained within. It was no less than he deserved.

  So, Cas. This apology of yours… I’m not going to comment beyond this. As I said, I’ve not made my mind up whether you’re sincere or not. I appreciate that you made it, and we’ll leave things there for now.

  Roger and Lori… what a mess. What a damned mess. I don’t feel as guilty about leaving town as I think I would have a few months ago, and of course, I feel guilty about that. I used the new number-block feature to keep the phone number off her caller ID and called her this afternoon. She thinks I’m in Georgia with one of Eli’s granddaughters. I asked her about the missed dates and she brushed me off by saying she’d been with her parents. Maybe she was. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just paranoid now, expecting everyone to lie about everything. I resent the hell out of that new view on the world, just in case you wondered. I don’t like being cynical. But there was a tone to her voice that made me wonder.

&nb
sp; On the other hand, the good news was that Roger has upped her weekly allowance. He’s giving her enough money now that she can buy the groceries she needs and wants. She was so damned excited about that, it just destroyed me. I’m relieved that I don’t have to worry about her going hungry or doing without now that I’m not there, but at the same time, I know he probably only did it to keep me away from her. Regardless, I’m glad.

  Beating the shit out of Roger… If I thought you all could get away with it and not have repercussions? I’m not a big enough person to say I would ask you to stop. But there would be a cost to you all and I’d hate to have that on my conscience, or for you to have it on yours.

  The other, less-stressful topics. Your poor students. I have to say that I’m imagining your classes, and I’m in tears laughing at what I’m coming up with. You do a stern face very well, and you’re quite intimidating physically. Though not as intimidating as Archer… I’ve seen him scare the pants off more than one person when he’s concentrating. He’s the biggest teddy bear in the world, but he can also come up with a good frown upon occasion, come to think of it. In any event, as long as I don’t hear about you on the news I will assume things are going well.

  I’ve not decided if I’m going to write you again or not. I’m no more eager to put myself out there where you’re concerned than you are with me. Getting burned hurts, and I’d just as soon not do it again.

  I suppose I’ll make my decision if you respond.