The Bastard’s Pearl

by Connie Bailey

  Sheyn’s eyes opened wide as a thought occurred to him. Taking Aeriq’s arm gently in his hands, he focused his will. “How does it feel now?” he asked.

  “It doesn’t hurt at all,” Aeriq said in tones of wonder. He touched the point of the break. “It’s… it feels as though it isn’t injured at all. How?” he asked as he unwrapped the strip of linen.

  “It’s something I learned to do while I was here. I’ll tell you about it later, but now I want to hear your story.”

  “Very well. When I realized you were gone, I searched for you with every resource I could muster. I had to stop and rebuild my fortune, but then I began searching again. And after all that effort and money, the clue came to me by chance.

  “I was attending an auction of precious metals, and a jeweler of Moon Trine house approached me. He was surprised that the ring he’d made for me was up for sale as he remembered it being a very special present for someone I held dear. I knew instantly what ring he meant, and I think I frightened him with my loud demand that he show me where it was. After that, it was simply a matter of backtracking each time the ring had changed hands.”

  “But surely that trail went cold at the Greiwoll.”

  “As your parents always suspected, I have friends in the smuggling trade. It’s true that the trail seemed to end with the caravan, but I held out hope you hadn’t been killed and tossed in a river. Being a merchant at heart, my next thought was that you’d been sold as well as your belongings. I appealed to my more disreputable friends and eventually I was given the name of a man known to traffic in slaves who was said to do business on the other side of the Greiwoll. I didn’t believe it, of course, but I was wrong. This merchant actually bragged to me about selling you to some savage king.”

  “And you followed that clue to Kandaar. You’re braver than I ever gave you credit for.”

  “I was obsessed.” Aeriq smiled. “Tell me your tale.”

  Sheyn offered more khai, and Aeriq finished two cups before Sheyn finished speaking.

  “I’m astounded,” Aeriq said. “When I reached Kandaar, I began to hear tales of Pearl, an ice warrior who rid Kandaar of demons, but though the stories described a beautiful youth with hair like moonlight, I never dreamed it was you.”

  “I’m not the Sheyn you knew in Dey Larone. What I loved most was taken from me and it changed me forever.” Sheyn sighed. “I’d like to sleep now. You should too. Morning comes early for us Hawks.”

  Still marveling at the changes in Sheyn, Aeriq accepted a blanket and lay down on the ground with the troopers. At first light, they rose and rode to Taar Muergan.

  LUKS LOOKED away from the sleeping man in Sheyn’s bed. “He came all the way from the Farthest West to find you,” he said.

  Sheyn nodded. “Poor man. I was never kind to him, and he loved me nonetheless.”

  “What will you do with him?”

  “Let him recover and send him home, if that’s what he wants.” Sheyn glanced at Luks. “What’s in the pretty head of yours?”

  “He’s very handsome.” Luks brushed a finger over Aeriq’s freshly shaven cheek.

  “Yes, he is. He’s handsome and brave and loyal. What of it?”

  “Nothing. I just wish you weren’t so alone.”

  “I’m not alone. I have you and Kholya and the Hawks.”

  “Don’t you want someone to—?”

  “If you know a way to bring Kashyan back, please tell me. If not, please don’t speak of such things to me.”

  Luks folded his lips and let the subject drop for the time being. However, it had been a year since Taankh was repelled and banished, and it broke Luks’s heart to see Sheyn still grieving. If there was no man of Kandaar who would do for Pearl, perhaps this foreigner could coax him into a happier mood.

  “I’m sorry,” Sheyn said softly. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

  Luks took Sheyn’s hand. “I know you didn’t. There’s so much pain in you that sometimes it leaks out and spills onto those close to you.”

  “I’ll try to be more careful.”

  “Good, and try to be happier as well.” Luks squeezed Sheyn’s hand and let it go. “And get some rest. We can wait until tomorrow to feast with your friend.”

  Sheyn embraced Luks and went to lie down on the divan. He slept for a few hours and woke to find Aeriq looking down at him.

  “I didn’t mean to startle you,” Aeriq said. “I was watching you sleep. You’re as beautiful as you ever were.” He reached out to touch one of Sheyn’s daaksi scars but drew his hand back. “It’s difficult to credit your talk of magic and Gods, but there is something otherworldly about you.”

  At the sound of a knock, Sheyn called out permission to enter. A palace servant came in with a tray and set it on a table. Sheyn thanked the man, dismissed him, and hurried to the food. Aeriq followed a bit more slowly, smiling at the amount Sheyn piled on his plate.

  “Sit and eat,” Sheyn said. “It’s quite good.”

  “Thank you.” Aeriq helped himself to a plate and a cup of ale. “Now that I’ve recovered from the treatment those lunatics gave me, I’d like to talk about why I’m here.”

  “You said you came to find me.”

  “I came here to find you and take you home.”

  “Kandaar is my home now.”

  “Surely not. I can see you’ve made a place for yourself, but you’re not happy here.”

  “Happy?” Sheyn set down an unbitten sun apple. “No, I’m not, but I’m tied to this land now, and there’s a possibility that I won’t be this miserable forever. My closest friend assures me that the worst grief fades in time.”

  “Did you love him that much? Whoever the man was who left you.”

  Sheyn heard the raw pain in Aeriq’s voice, but he had no balm for him. “I love him more than my life. If my death would bring him back, I’d kill myself.”

  “But you still wouldn’t be together.”

  “I know.”

  “Could you love me?” Aeriq asked. “Is there even the possibility that one day you might?”

  “How can I answer that?”

  “You just did.” Aeriq studied Sheyn’s face for several moments. “You’re definitely not the boy who left Dey Larone almost three years ago.”

  “Only three?” Sheyn thought briefly of all that had happened to him, and it didn’t seem possible that so little time had passed.

  “It seems like a decade at least, doesn’t it?”

  “At least.” Sheyn met Aeriq’s eyes. “And the honest answer is no. I’ll never love you the way you want me to.” He paused. “I guess you’ve had a long trip for nothing.”

  “No, not for nothing. I know you’re alive. Not knowing your fate would have haunted me to my grave. And I can tell your parents that you survived.”

  “My parents.” Sheyn fell silent.

  “They’re well,” Aeriq said. “Heartbroken but healthy. Your mother is chief councilor now.”

  “Yes, her work would be a distraction for her. And for my father. It’s what they love.”

  Aeriq sighed. “Do you truly intend to stay here?”

  “Since that rogue priest changed me, I don’t think I can leave. My destiny is bound up with Kandaar’s and it will not release me.” Sheyn looked down at his hands. “Perhaps you’d carry a message to Mother and Father.”

  “I will do whatever you ask.”

  Sheyn put his hand over Aeriq’s. “You’re a good man. I’m sorry I was so horrid to you.”

  “I didn’t mind. I loved everything about you.”

  “I understand that now. When you love someone, the things that annoy you become endearing.”

  “Just so.” Aeriq smiled. “It’s odd. For years I’ve pursued this vision of you, and now that I’ve found you, you aren’t you.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “So am I, but I also feel like a great weight has lifted. I no longer have a purpose, but I’m free.”

  Sheyn gazed on Aeriq’s face for sever
al moments. “I know how that feels,” he said at last. “So much has happened. I’m twenty-one, but I feel as though I’m one hundred.” He smiled at Aeriq. “Would you mind terribly if I went back to sleep?”

  “Would you mind if I watched you?”

  Sheyn’s smile was a shade brighter this time. “Always the flatterer,” he said fondly and rose to go to the divan.

  “Take your bed back,” Aeriq said. “I’ll be quite comfortable here in the sitting room.”

  Sheyn changed directions and went to lie down on the soft mattress Luks had chosen for him. “Call me if anyone knocks,” he said before he closed his eyes. He heard Aeriq respond, but the sound was faint as though it came from a great distance. The sea of dreams had already pulled him in and swept him away.

  In his dreams, Sheyn drifted from one life to the next in an unfolding of Kandaar’s history from the dawn of time. In each era, he was a daaksi, close to a great king, as companion, lover, guide. He wielded enormous power in the service of his lord, destroying enemies, providing healing, bringing comfort and victory in equal measure. In each life, his power diminished and the gold-edged dreams became tarnished. Deeper and deeper he sank until he came to a place where the light couldn’t penetrate.

  For an age, Sheyn fell through the freezing, lightless void, paralyzed and helpless to slow his descent. Incapable of resisting, he hurtled downward faster and faster until he lost all sense of motion. He and the dark were moving at the same speed. And he remembered where and when he’d last experienced this sense of being enveloped by darkness.

  “Kasha,” Sheyn gasped, and Kashyan was there in front of him.

  The Bastard’s great muscles bulged and gleamed with sweat as he grappled with Taankh on the Threshold. It was as though Kashyan and the God of Death were frozen in the moment Taankh had been pushed back through the Gate. Sheyn’s heart broke at the thought of Kashyan locked forever in this inimical embrace. And then Kashyan looked back over his shoulder and met Sheyn’s eyes.

  Help me, he said.

  Sheyn tried to go to Kashyan, but something held him back.

  Wake up!

  Sheyn struck out at the tentacles that bound his arms.

  “Sheyn, wake up! You’re having a nightmare!”

  Sheyn opened his eyes and saw Aeriq bending over him.

  “You were screaming,” Aeriq said. “Are you all right?”

  Sheyn took a deep breath and willed his galloping heart to slow down. “No,” he said breathlessly. “I’m not all right.”

  “It was just a nightmare. You’re safe.”

  “No, it wasn’t.” Sheyn sat up. “There’s something I need to do.”

  Aeriq stood aside so Sheyn could get out of bed. “I’m not sure I like how you look. Is there a physician I could call for?”

  “I’m not sick.” Sheyn swiftly shed the clothes he’d fallen asleep in, oblivious to Aeriq’s astonished stare. He pulled on the royal blue court robe Luks had sent over and pushed his feet into a pair of low boots.

  “Where are you going?” Aeriq asked as Sheyn strode to the door.

  Sheyn paused in the doorway. “All this time I assumed Kasha was dead. But what if he isn’t? What if he’s doomed to bar Taankh’s way for eternity? What if I can bring him back?”

  Chapter 29

  “ARE YOU certain this is a good idea?” Aeriq asked when he and Sheyn reached the great square where the Red Temple had once stood.

  “You don’t have to be here, but if you’re going to stay, please stay quiet.”

  Aeriq moved out of Sheyn’s line of sight. Sheyn blocked out all extraneous sounds and smells and concentrated. In moments, he found the spot where the altar of the Gate had been located. There was nothing now to mark where so many had suffered at the hands of madmen bent on domination. All traces of the Red Temple had been scoured away, and new paving stones had been put down. However, Sheyn could sense the maw of the Threshold when he stood beneath it.

  Gathering himself, Sheyn loosed the flood of his memories of Kashyan. The first time he’d seen the warrior prince, the sheer height and breadth of him, the shaggy black hair, bronzed skin, and pale green eyes, the bloody sword. He remembered his exasperation with the ignorant, overbearing savage, and he remembered the moment he’d seen him as a person with fears of his own. The memory of their first joining swept through him like a warm wave, and he clenched his hands into fists as though he could hold on to it. He let the memories fill him like points of light, and then he let them shine forth in a beacon of pure love.

  Child, what are you doing?

  The Goddess’s voice rang in Sheyn’s skull, and his teeth and bones vibrated with its timbre. He tried to ignore it, but it was impossible. “I’m going to bring Kashyan back,” he said.

  Aeriq looked around to see who Sheyn might be talking to and saw no one but himself. “Are you speaking to me?” he asked.

  You must not do this.

  “I must!”

  You risk allowing the God of Death to return.

  “I can’t leave Kashyan there. He suffers horribly.”

  He suffers willingly to keep you safe.

  “I don’t want to buy my safety with that coin. The price is too steep.”

  And what of the rest of your world? Would they count the price too steep?

  “I don’t care.”

  You don’t mean that.

  Sheyn calmed himself. “If someone must block the Threshold, let it be me.”

  No, my most beloved child. You will serve better in this world.

  “It’s my life to trade.”

  You are right.

  Sheyn almost went to his knees as the weight of Anaali’s sorrow fell on him. “Will you help me?” he asked.

  I cannot refuse you now. The bond of service runs both directions.

  “Sheyn?” Aeriq touched Sheyn’s forearm. “Who are you talking to?”

  Sheyn didn’t answer, but the warmth of Aeriq’s touch penetrated his trance. Taking heart again, he asked the Goddess a question. “Why must someone guard the Threshold? Why can’t we close it?”

  If the Threshold is closed, there can be no crossing from one realm to another. The demons but also the Gods and Goddesses would be barred.

  “Maybe it’s time we learned to live without them.”

  As you will, my own.

  Sheyn felt the phantom caress of cool fingers on his cheek, and his hair lifted in the breeze that blew only on him.

  Well done. You are worthy to take your place as my incarnation in this realm. Now prepare for the hardest battle of your life.

  “I’m ready.”

  “Sheyn?” Aeriq stared as Sheyn rose a few inches off the paving stones. After a few moments, he realized he could see the other side of the square through Sheyn’s translucent form. When he grabbed for Sheyn’s hand, his fingers passed through with no resistance.

  Be strong.

  “I am strong,” Sheyn answered.

  There is a crack in the heart of the universe.

  “I feel it.”

  It will require an enormous amount of energy to fill it, maybe more than you possess. Do you still wish to do this?

  “I do.” Sheyn felt Anaali’s approval and pride like the sun shining on his bare skin. He absorbed the heat and light and let it radiate outward from his core. He was the moon. He was a sword made of light. And he shone so very brightly.

  “Sheyn?” Aeriq whispered as Sheyn rose to shoulder height.

  Though it was a moonless midnight, the square was lit as though it were noon. People gathered in ones and twos until a large crowd formed a ring around Pearl’s floating, glowing figure. There were a few reverent murmurs, but for the most part, the people were silent with awe. Aeriq jumped when someone touched his elbow.

  “What’s happening here?” Kholya asked.

  “I swear by Leynys, I don’t know,” Aeriq said.

  “How long has Pearl been like this?” Luks asked.

  Aeriq glanced up. “Not too long, I
think. A quarter hour, perhaps.” He fixed his eyes on Sheyn again. “He keeps talking to someone.”

  Luks left Kholya’s side and went to Sheyn. Bowing his head, he cleared his mind and let his life force flow out like the breath from his lungs. He felt the Goddess’s presence, and he felt it when his energy was drawn to Sheyn, strengthening his friend. As he grew weak, he stretched out a hand to Kholya, and Kholya took it between both of his. More strength flowed into Sheyn, and the light in the square grew brighter.

  Child.

  “Yes, Lady?”

  Our wills are not enough. We need more energy.

  Sheyn gritted his teeth and extended the sphere of his influence until he was drawing on the crowd in the square. His every cell screamed in pain as he pushed his way into the Unseen Realm. The cold was so intense he felt as though he was being burned alive, and a terrible pressure squeezed him like a giant fist. He was afraid a breath would freeze his lungs, and he kept his eyes closed for fear they’d turn to ice. And then he sensed Kashyan’s presence.

  Sheyn opened his eyes on darkness and saw Kashyan braced against Taankh’s bulk, both outlined in cold, blue light. “Bastard! Let go!” he called.

  Kashyan wavered.

  “It’s all right,” Sheyn told him. “You can come home now.” The cold sank deeper, and he knew in a few more moments, he wouldn’t be able to speak or do anything else. He would be a frozen cinder sucked dry. “Take my hand.”

  Taankh focused his malevolent will on Sheyn, and the crushing pressure increased. Tasty one. The Demon God’s words grated on the inside of Sheyn’s skull. Come closer that I may swallow you and the spark of the Bitch that shines in you.

  “Go back,” Kashyan said in a strained voice.

  Sheyn moved closer, forcing his way through the numbing nothingness of the Threshold to the only warm spot in creation. Fending off the enormous pressure of Taankh’s will, he reached Kashyan and put a hand on his shoulder. Kashyan’s love for Sheyn and determination to protect him filled Sheyn like spring water poured into a crystal goblet. Sheyn called for power, and it came to his hand. “I love you,” he managed to say before he ripped Kashyan from Taankh’s hold and flung him away. As Kashyan hurtled through the Gate to the Waking World, Sheyn took his place blocking Taankh. Instantly, knives of ice pierced every particle of his being, and he screamed at the searing agony. He didn’t see how he could withstand this for long, but he knew that he had to.