Sweat started to form on his forehead and on the palms of his hands as she got closer to the altar. He was anxious to have her close to him, and yet nervous tension filled his body. Maybe his mom was right; he needed to live his life. I could still be a caring and doting son without avoiding my own responsibilities. Without giving up the things that make me happy. He’d been worrying so much about his mom, he’d forgotten what truly made him happy. Alison. She was all he ever wanted.
Maybe it was a blessing that his mom and sister had turned down the invite. Maybe Mom had done it on purpose. She was a wise woman, after all. If Mom and Kassie were in attendance, he’d be focused on them. But since they weren’t, all of his attention was free to give to Ali. Where it should’ve been all along.
Finally reaching the altar, Alison walked up the few steps until she was face-to-face with Dom. She patted him on the arm and a smile slid across her lips.
Then her eyes moved to Kaden and her smile became bashful and his heart skipped another beat.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Alison
Getting into the church without seeing Kaden was the easy part. Standing at the altar with him would be challenging.
Alison stared at Hailee twirling in front of the mirror in her wedding gown, but her mind was on Kaden. Slowly, she ran her hand along her stomach. Her bump was barely noticeable, but still this movement had become more of a habit now. She wanted nothing more than Kaden in her life. Being on her own so far had left her craving a partner, someone to share this experience with.
It wasn’t that she thought Kaden was intentionally shutting her out, but he certainly wasn’t putting her first. Or second. Or even third. And in her mind, that was just as bad.
Her head told her that she was strong enough to do this on her own, because being with Kaden would never work. But her heart had a different opinion. She could see what was right in front of her. She still loved him. And she still needed and wanted him.
“So, do you think there’s a wedding gown in your future, maybe?” Hailee did one last twirl with an excited shriek. “You wouldn’t think I’d be in love with this girly and completely traditional white wedding dress, but I totally am.” Hailee, with her violet hair and many, many tattoos, was not the most “girly” of fashionistas.
“You look gorgeous, Hailee.” Tears started to form in Alison’s eyes. I told myself I wasn’t going to cry.
“Thank you. And Ali, please get those pregnancy hormones in check.” She joked. Stepping closer, she wrapped her arms around Alison. “I refuse to cry this early in the day and mess up my makeup. There will be plenty of time for that later.” Hailee was a bit heavy on the eyeliner, and tears might certainly make a mess.
In an effort to push back the hormonal tears, Alison didn’t speak, only shook her head. She had made a big decision, and that decision was that she loved Kaden. Today was going to be full of romance and emotions. What better day to put her feelings out there? Just because her dad wasn’t a real man didn’t mean Kaden wasn’t one. And she was willing to give him the chance to prove it.
“Take it from me; you need to talk to him.” Hailee knew all too well that running didn’t solve anything. “Things are rarely what they seem, or in your case, what your mind can conjure up.”
“I know.” They were having a baby. She didn’t want to do it alone. Every text message he sent her made her miss him more. Regardless of what her head kept telling her, she missed him and she was going to listen to her heart.
“Ali, I know you better than you know yourself.” Hailee picked up her veil and fiddled around with it, doing her best to adjust it on her violet hair.
“Give me that.” Alison took the veil that was in no way straight the way Hailee was doing it, and fixed it herself.
“You love him, don’t you?” Hailee was never one to mince words. Just one of the things she loved so much about her. Usually.
She wanted things to be the way they were before. Every moment had been so easy with him. Can’t things still be easy? She nodded with an unintentional pout. “I’ve never told him.” But in her defense, he’d never said that word to her, either. Why would she put herself out there like that without knowing damn sure he wasn’t going to break her heart?
“I’m going to guess that he hasn’t said it either.” Hailee admired herself in the full-length mirror.
“No.” Today was a day full of love and romance, and she wasn’t immune to that. Her stomach flopped and her heart beat triple time in her chest. She didn’t want to be just a responsibility to him, but her desire for him was still so strong.
“Ali, I have a good feeling about today. And not just because it’s my wedding day. Give him a chance. You know he’s a good guy. Go into today with an open mind or heart, and today just might turn out to be a blessing.” Hailee cracked the door to the vestibule. “Listen, they’re playing my song. You ready?”
Alison wanted to give Kaden a chance, more than Hailee knew. The only thing holding her back until now was fear. She didn’t want to be scared anymore. She just wanted the man she loved. Grabbing her bouquet, she led the way out to the church lobby.
At the large open doors to the church, she looked back at her friend before beginning her walk down the aisle. Hailee was a beautiful bride.
She gave Hailee one last hug. “Love you, Hail. I’m so happy for you guys.”
“Love you back, Ali. Remember, no tears. Not yet. See you down there.” Hailee looked completely calm, while Alison was the one who felt like a nervous wreck.
Gripping her flowers tightly, Alison slowly made her way towards the altar. Focusing on the guests around her, she tried not to look up ahead, not yet.
Everything around her screamed romance. The flowers, the music, the vibe of the room, everything planned perfectly down to the last little detail. The organist played, filling the giant church with music. The guests all stood, looking at her but awaiting the star of the day, Hailee.
Lowering her eyes, Ali concentrated on the floor ahead of her until she finally reached the altar. Taking a deep breath, she looked up at Dom, gently gripped his arm and offered him a warm smile. Dom made a handsome groom, just like she knew he would. He and Hailee truly had a storybook romance and were perfect for one another.
Then her eyes met Kaden’s. He was absolutely dashing in his tux. His expression was genuine, and his grin soft as he nodded to her. Her breathing faltered as she grinned back at him and looked into his sparkling eyes.
His gaze was heavy on her as she took her place and waited for the bride. Alison couldn’t help but sneak looks at Kaden. Not until this moment did she realize how much she actually missed him over the last couple weeks.
The entire church turned to watch as Hailee’s dad walked her down the aisle. Tears flooded Alison’s eyes as she watched Hailee. There’d never been a more beautiful bride. Careful to always rest her bouquet on her forming baby bump, out of the corner of her eye, Ali snuck glances at Kaden. Every time she did, her look met his. Maybe it was the romantic environment, maybe it was her hormones. Whatever it was, she just wanted to be at his side.
Mr. Valentine moved Hailee’s veil and kissed her cheek before placing her hand in Dominic’s. She beamed as she took her place beside her groom, while the priest welcomed everyone.
During prayer and a reading, Alison did her best to concentrate on the Father and what he was saying, but her mind, as well as her eyes, drifted to Kaden. She didn’t know the words to the hymns, not like Dom and Hailee seemed to. She did her best, but most times just stayed silent.
Kaden was in her line of sight while she watched Dom and Hailee. When the time came for Hailee and Dom to say their vows, it was as if no one else existed. Looking longingly into each other’s eyes, they declared their love for one another. Their words beautiful and touching, they briefly touched on their time apart and how they always knew they were meant for one another.
Those words rang true for Alison. She laid her hand on her stomach. She was sure that
Kaden was the only one for her.
Kaden seemed to fumble as he handed over the rings. Alison was just glad she didn’t have that job. Her fingers were a bit swollen, and she could see herself dropping the little rings. She held on to the bouquet tightly as it was, fearful she’d drop it.
The words they spoke were romantic, and she watched, starry-eyed. Someday she wanted all this. Warm tears fought their way to the surface, and Alison tried hard not to let them fall, while Hailee openly wept as Dom slid the ring onto her finger.
Alison and the rest of the guests knelt while the priest offered communion to those who wanted it. She was supposed to be praying, or at least reflecting, during this time, but all she could do was watch Kaden out of the corner of her eye.
Maybe she could consider it reflecting as she thought about him. They had been together since Dom had come back into Hailee’s life. The words might not have been spoken, but they’d been committed, and they were good together.
Doubting his loyalty to her was only her insecurity talking. She needed to give him a chance. She touched her belly. This may not have been planned, but she very much wanted them to do this together.
The organ music echoed in her ears and the priest’s voice was muffled. Her focus was on Kaden. She stood and kneeled at the official’s gestures, but she was just going through the motions at this point.
Once mass was over, the priest blessed everyone and the new couple. He spoke to the guests and held up his arms. “Ladies and gentleman, please welcome Mr. and Mrs. Dominic Zanetti.”
The guests clapped and some loud whistles and cheers came from the direction of where the team was sitting.
Alison ran her hand over her bump as a flutter moved through her belly. The little one must be moving, maybe from all the excitement.
Dom leaned in and planted a heavy kiss on his new bride. Alison swore she saw the priest blush. When Dom pulled away, Hailee beamed as he took her hand in his and raised their intertwined hands into the air.
“Yeah!” Dom yelled loudly.
Alison’s eyes met Kaden’s again. Just as she’d been watching him during the ceremony, he watched her. The fluttering crossed her stomach again until she lowered her glance to the floor. The church bells rang, and the organist played traditional joyful exit music, which was the bride and groom’s cue to head down the aisle.
Before the happy couple left the altar, Dom leaned over towards her, grinning, and whispered, “You two kids play nice.”
“I always do,” Alison jokingly said. Maybe it was the ceremony, maybe it was the love so heavy in the air that you could feel it, but her heart was finally taking the lead.
Dom and Hailee walked down the aisle of the church as people applauded. Alison took a deep breath, knowing what came next. Running her hand over her tiny bump, she met Kaden at the altar.
Her stomach fluttered again; this time she had butterflies as well. Being close to him again was like old times. She was anxious to get closer. But as soon as they were alone, the elephant in the room would be revealed.
“Hi.” His smile was small and sweet, somewhat apprehensive. He glanced at her hand on her stomach, then held out his arm for her to loop hers in. She took hold of his arm, and without another word they followed the bride and groom to the back of the church.
“Are you okay?” Kaden whispered, as they walked up the aisle.
She caught him eyeing the bouquet resting on her belly. “Yeah. Fine.” Standing with him, her arm locked with his made her heart soar.
“I’m happy to see you, Ali. I’ve missed you.” Kaden was still grinning with a bashful charm.
“Me too.” Something inside her couldn’t stop her from loving him. Her insides turned to mush when she looked at him, like a teenager with a crush. As the vestibule of the church got closer, her heart sped up. The walk needed to be longer.
The serenity of the church made her troubles go away. But as soon as they were out in the real world, things needed to be discussed. What would his part be in their lives?
But at this moment, he securely held her as they walked arm in arm, no questions, no worries. It was just the two of them, and it felt right.
Back in the church she’d felt safe, almost shielded from the world of real problems and responsibility. But now outside in the big, wide world, those same responsibilities and questions closed in on her.
Kaden’s voice startled her from behind. “Ali, do you need a ride to the reception?”
Actually, now that the limo was for the bride and groom, she did. “Well… Yes.” Being alone in a car with Kaden—the thought of it tickled her insides and terrified her heart all at the same time. Looking away from her, he checked his phone.
The same burning, irritating feeling that had niggled away at her the times he’d blown her off, came rushing back. Her attitude turned snippy and her words short. “But I’m sure you’re busy. So I’ll find my own way there.” The anger came out of nowhere, surprising even her.
Trying to make a quick escape, Alison turned away so fast that her head spun, too. The dizziness caused her to wobble on her heels, and she braced for the harsh feel of the pavement. Instead, two strong arms caught her and grasped her tenderly.
“Ali! Are you okay?” Kaden’s breath was hot against her neck. “Ali?”
Stunned by her near fall, and even more dumbfounded at being wrapped up in his arms again, she just nodded. Shaking the confusion away, she tried standing up on her own power. Kaden, not letting go, helped her straighten up, and doted over her for a few more moments.
“Are you sure you’re okay? You didn’t hurt anything?” He looked her over and rubbed her arms, then his attention went to her belly.
She missed the feeling of comfort that his arms provided. “We’re fine.” Turning away, more carefully this time, she tried to move towards the crowd, maybe to find Mia and catch a ride to the reception, scared by the overwhelming feelings she was having. But a strong hand tugged at her wrist, stopping her.
“Ali. Please. Please let me drive you to the reception. We need to talk about a few things.” His eyes were wide, as if he was pleading with her, and she swore she saw pain in them. He held his hand out to her and waited.
The hurt that showed in his face made her heart sink. Taking his hand, she could only do one thing: agree. “Okay.”
His face lit up at her answer. As the crowd dispersed to their cars, he walked her to his Corvette, holding her as securely as possible, as if fearing another fall. “You’re sure you are okay?”
“Kaden, I’m fine. I was just a bit off balance.” Her brain screamed with defiance, while her body wanted nothing more than to feel his hand slip into hers.
“Why did you try to run in the first place?” He tightened his grasp, possibly worried she’d run again.
Taking a calming breath, she tried to not sound like a bitch. “You were obviously busy. I am more than capable of taking care of myself.”
“Busy? With what?” His scrunched up face made her believe he had no idea what she was talking about.
“Whoever texted you. You were checking your phone. I don’t need to be a third wheel, if you and your date—”
“Woah, there… I was checking my phone to see if my sister messaged me at all during the ceremony. I had my phone turned off so as not to interrupt the wedding. C’mon, get in. We really need to talk.” He opened the door of the sports car and helped her sit down, being mindful of her dress.
Once seated in the driver’s seat, Kaden took a deep breath while staring out the front window. Finally, after a few moments, he started the car, but left it in park. He didn’t look like his cocky, fun-loving self as he nervously ran his hands through his hair and fidgeted with the steering wheel cover, picking at any visible string or brushing off dust that was only visible to him.
“Kaden?” Maybe what he has to tell me is really bad. Like he is seeing someone. Oh my god, why would I even jump to that conclusion? Bracing for the worst, she took long breaths and tried to ke
ep her emotions in check by counting to one hundred until he decided to speak.
“I need to apologize for being so absent lately. That wasn’t very fair to you. It sounds really lame, but I didn’t even know where to start.”
She changed her mind about wanting to hear any of this. Why ruin the nice day I was having?
“Kaden, can we not talk about it right now?” Her stomach went queasy and she didn’t want to jump right into this. Actually, I think I might be sick. “Look, if you’ve found someone else, can we save this talk for later? More than likely, the hormones won’t play nice, and my makeup will be a terrible mess. I’d rather not look like a sappy, crying mess at my best friend’s wedding. Okay? So can we just put a pin in this for later?” Oh my god. Why do I keep going there? These hormones are making me say the weirdest things.
His brow wrinkled in confusion before he continued. “Ali, there’s no one else.”
Holding her breath for the news that she didn’t want to hear, she instantly relaxed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”
“It’s my mom. She’s sick.” With his eyes trained on the front window, and his hands gripping the steering wheel, it appeared as if he didn’t want to stop the momentum of his rehearsed explanation, so she didn’t interrupt. “I didn’t want to worry you with any of this. You didn’t need the stress, and you haven’t even met Mom yet. But since my Dad passed, I’ve felt responsible for her and my sister. It’s my job to take care of her now. When she told me she was sick, I made an appointment with one of the doctors here in Pittsburgh. Not that the doctors in Toronto couldn’t have been helpful, but I wanted her here. I couldn’t be so far away from her during all of this.”
Resting her hand on her stomach, Alison did her best to understand all he had just said. “Um, okay. Is your mom better now?”
“Back home the doctors diagnosed her with thyroid cancer. I wanted a second opinion.”
SHOOTOUT SAVE (The Renegades Series Book 6) Page 17