by Brian James
“More like filthy sailing,” Inna grumbled.
Just then, we heard Captain Dagger Dan order all hands on deck.
We hurried onto the main deck. The whole crew was there. There were tall pirates and short pirates and ugly pirates and really ugly pirates. Each one of them was dirtier than the next. Plus, they all smelled a little stinky. But that wasn’t the strange part. The strange thing was that NONE of them were doing any chores!
“Arrr, this sure is one funny ship,” I whispered to Gary.
“Aye,” Gary whispered back.
Then Captain Dagger Dan ordered the crew to raise the sails. “We be setting a new course,” he said.
“Arrr! Where’re we headed, Cap’n?” Peg Leg Pedro asked.
Captain Dagger Dan closed one eye and tugged on his black beard. “ARRR! We be heading for treasure,” he said. The crew cheered.
I let out a loud cheer, too. That’s because hunting for treasure was my favorite pirate thing to do.
“There be a treasure not too far from here,” Captain Dagger Dan told us. “No ship has ever dared to claim it because it be lost in the depths of Shipwreck Pass. But that won’t stop us, will it, mates?”
The crew of the Bone Rattler cheered even louder than before. But I didn’t cheer at all this time.
“Great sails,” I said to my mates. “I don’t like the sound of that place.”
“Aye!” Gary said. “I read all about Shipwreck Pass in my book of pirate tales. It said no ship has ever made it back from there in one piece.”
Inna flashed Gary a mean look. Then she pulled his hat down over his ears and bopped him on the head. “What did I tell you about bringing up those scary stories?” she growled.
Gary fixed his glasses and rubbed the ouch off his head. “Arrr, you told me not to,” he said.
“That’s right! So take it back!” Inna shouted.
“Arrr! Don’t get your sails in a bunch,” Vicky said. “We’ll be safe as seashells! The cap’n knows what he’s doing.”
“Aye,” Aaron agreed. “This is going to be easy breezy!”
Sometimes Aaron could be a real know-it-all. This time, I hoped he really did know what he was talking about.
Chapter 5
Vacation at Sea
“Shiver me timbers,” I said. That’s because my timbers were shaking all over the place. The Bone Rattler was getting tossed around by even the smallest waves. It was like sailing through a storm even though the sea was calm.
“Arrr, we might sink before we even get to Shipwreck Pass!” Gary said. Inna crossed her arms and growled at him. Gary covered his head real quick before Inna had the chance to bop him again.
“Aye,” I said. “Gary’s right. This ship is in bad shape. We better start making repairs or we’ll never stay afloat.”
“Aye, aye!” Inna and Gary said.
“First, we should try to get some other pirates to help us,” I said.
“Aye,” Gary said. “How about Aaron and Vicky?”
“Arrr,” Inna growled. “Those two won’t be any help. They’re too busy running wild!”
I took a peek around the deck. I spied Aaron and Vicky. They were leaping over barrels and racing around the masts with Peg Leg Pedro and their parents.
“Aye, Inna’s right,” I said. Then I pointed to a group of pirates lazing around by the railing. They looked as strong as rocks, and each of them had their bandanas over their eyes for a nap. “Let’s ask them,” I said.
We got up next to them and had to cover our ears. They were snoring so loud, it sounded like thunder.
“Maybe we shouldn’t wake them up,” Gary said. “They don’t look very nice. They might toss us overboard if we ruin their nap.”
“Flaming fish guts!” Inna said. “They don’t look so scary. Besides, it’s their duty to get this ship in shape.”
“Aye,” I said. Then I tapped the biggest pirate on the shoulder. He moaned and groaned and opened one eye. Then I gulped because I saw he only had one eye! The other eye was made of black glass.
“Arrr?” he growled.
“He doesn’t look so jolly,” I whispered.
“I told you we should’ve let him get some shut-eye,” Gary whispered back.
“Arrr, but we need their help,” I said.
“Help with what?” the snoozy pirate roared.
We GULPED!
“Help—help fixing the ship,” Inna stuttered.
“Hogwash! This ship’s fine,” the pirate mumbled. Then he closed his eye again. We asked each of the other pirates to help, but they all said the same thing.
“I guess we’ll have to do it by ourselves,” I said.
“Aye,” Inna said. “I’ll stitch up all the tiny rips in the sail.”
“Good thinking,” I said. “And me and Gary will hammer all these boards until they’re solid.”
Inna started stitching, and I started hammering. Gary started hammering, too, only he had to stop right away. That’s because he hammered his pants to the deck by mistake and got stuck.
Aaron raced by and spied Gary trying to get loose. He held his belly and started laughing. “Yo-ho-ho!” he bellowed. “Gary blundered himself to the deck.”
“Aye?” Vicky shouted. She stopped playing, too, and took a peek at Gary. Then she put her hands over her mouth to cover a giggle.
“Arrr! Maybe if you two helped, Gary wouldn’t be blundering all over the place!” Inna shouted.
Vicky put her hands on her hips and huffed. “Why are you doing chores, anyway?” she asked. “No other pirate is!”
“Aye!” Aaron said. “And Rotten Tooth isn’t around to give us orders. You should play tag with us. Peg Leg is so slow, he’ll never catch us!”
“Or get some shut-eye like the rest of the crew,” Vicky added.
“Arrr! But it’s our duty to take care of the ship,” I said.
“Aye! Pete’s right!” Inna said. “This ship’s sure to end up at the bottom of sea if we don’t do something!”
“Stow yer worries!” Vicky said. “This bucket of bolts is fine.”
“AYE! MORE THAN FINE! IT’S THE BEST SHIP ON THE SEA!” a voice boomed behind me. I spun around real fast and saw Captain Dagger Dan standing there.
“Ahoy, Cap’n,” I said.
“Ahoy to you,” he said. “Ye mind telling me why yer mucking about with those hammers?”
“Just doing some fixing, Cap’n,” I said. I couldn’t tell him that we thought his ship was in sink shape. Captains didn’t like it when pirate kids told them how to run their ship.
Dagger Dan bent down to look at me eye to eye.
I GULPED again!
He sure was a scary-looking pirate. Even in the daytime, his eyes were as black as the depths of the deepest sea! But then I had to rub my own eyes because I didn’t believe what they were showing me. That scary pirate Captain Dagger Dan was smiling and patting me on the head!
“I didn’t invite ye aboard to be deckhands,” he said. “You lil’ scoundrels are here to run amuck and have some fun!”
“HIP HIP HOORAY!” Aaron and Vicky shouted.
I wasn’t so shouty, though. The ship was still in danger.
“But Cap’n,” I said. “The pirate code says—”
“Fish feathers!” Captain Dagger Dan said before I could finish. “Now put those tools away and run wild! That be an order!”
“Aye, aye,” I mumbled.
“See, I told you!” Aaron said once the captain left. “We don’t have to do any of that stinky school stuff on this ship.”
“I guess you’re right,” I said with a shrug.
“I’m always right!” Aaron said. And for once, he really was right.
“What are we going to do now, Pete?” Gary asked me.
“Sink me,” I said. “I guess we should play. After all, orders be orders.”
“Aye, that’s the spirit!” Vicky said.
“Aye, let’s play swashbuckling!” Aaron shouted. Then he picked up a mop and st
arted swinging it around. If we were still on the Sea Rat, he would’ve been in big trouble. But here, we were allowed to buckle all we wanted.
And even though I was worried about the ship, I had to admit playing was a lot more fun than making repairs!
Chapter 6
Danger, Dead Ahead!
“Arrr! Don’t look now, but Shipwreck Pass is dead ahead!” I shouted.
The ship was sailing toward a large island. There was a narrow passage that went right through the middle, and jagged rocks stuck out in every direction.
“Good eye, matey!” Peg Leg Pedro said with a big smile.
Inna covered her eyes. Then she spread her fingers apart to take a peek. “It looks spooky,” she whispered.
“Aye,” Gary agreed.
“There’s nothing to be spooked about,” Peg Leg told us. “This here’s the finest crew and cap’n on the seas. We’ll get in there and get out with the treasure.”
“AYE!” Aaron and Vicky agreed.
I wasn’t so sure.
I wrinkled my nose and looked around. I saw one group of pirates playing cards and another group taking turns spitting over the railing. I even saw two pirates having a food fight and slinging slop about. But I didn’t see a single pirate working.
“I’ll go tell the cap’n we’ve made it,” Peg Leg said.
“Blimey! It looks like a ship graveyard!” Gary said once we were near enough to see the wrecks of a whole bunch of ships floating on the waves.
Inna reached over and yanked his hat over his ears. Then she gave him an extra-big bop on the head! “STOP SAYING SPOOKY STUFF!” she hollered.
“Arrr! But it’s the truth,” I said. “There must be one thousand hundred ships!” I wasn’t sure exactly how many sunken ships were there because pirates aren’t very good at counting. But I was sure one thousand hundred was a pretty good guess.
I kept glancing over my shoulder to see if the crew was paying attention. But they were all still mucking around.
“Arrr, those rocks are getting really close!” Gary said as the ship entered the pass. The jagged rocks were sticking out like sharp swords.
“Aye,” Vicky said. “This doesn’t look like such a good idea.”
“Sink me! You’re turning into a scallywag, too?” Aaron said.
“I’m no scallywag!” Vicky yelled. “But I don’t want to turn into shark bait, either.”
“Great sails!” Aaron said. “The cap’n knows what he’s doing. You’ll see!”
But the only thing I saw was a lot of sharp rocks getting closer and closer.
SMASH!
Then . . . CRASH!
The ship slammed right into one of the big rocks!
The whole entire ship wibbled and wobbled! It felt like the ship was going under.
“Let’s go, mateys!” I said. “We’d better see if the crew needs our help!”
I thought the whole crew would be rushing about trying to keep us afloat. But when I turned around, they were all still too busy goofing off.
We hurried to find Aaron and Vicky’s parents. We were sure they’d listen to us.
“Arrr! There you are!” Aaron and Vicky’s mom said once she saw us. “We were just coming to fetch ye runts!”
“Aye?” Vicky asked. “So you are worried?”
“Aye! Worried as whales!” their dad said.
I wiped my forehead. “At least some pirates have come to their senses,” I said.
“Aye!” their mom said. “The whole crew is getting set to sing a sea shanty without any pirates singing the chorus! That’s where we need ye lot to lend yer pipes!”
I looked at my mates and made a funny face. They all made funny faces back at me. Those funny faces meant we were confused.
“Aye? The whole crew is going to sing?” Vicky asked.
“Aye! They’re ready to burst,” her dad said.
“Isn’t any pirate checking the ship for damage?” I asked.
“Aye,” Inna said. “We hit that rock pretty hard!”
“Gullyfluff !” their dad said. Then he crossed his arms and lifted his head high in the air. It was the same thing Aaron did whenever he thought someone was being silly.
“Aye!” their mom said. “First we sing, then we work.”
“Arrr, this whole ship is crazy. We should check, anyway,” I whispered to Vicky.
“Aye,” Vicky whispered back. Then she told her parents we were going belowdecks. “We want to get some snacks before we sing,” she said. She knew if she’d told them the truth, they’d order us to have fun instead.
“Aye, good thinking,” I said once we were alone.
“Aye!” Aaron said. “I’m starving!”
“We’re not really getting snacks, dodo brain!” Vicky said. “We’re going to check on the ship.”
“Arrr!” Aaron said.
Then we raced down the galley steps. Soon we were on the lowest deck of the ship. Only it wasn’t really a deck anymore. It was more like a swimming pool!
“Sink me!” I shouted. “The ship has sprung a leak!”
Chapter 7
In a Fix
“Arrr! I’m not sure this is working,” Gary said. He had his finger plugged in a hole, but water was still seeping into the ship.
“Aye!” I said. I was covering the one big hole with both hands and water was still spraying me in the face!
“Hold yer sea horses!” Aaron told us. “I’ll have this water out in two shakes of a shark’s tail!” He grabbed a bucket and started scooping the water up. Then he poured the water into a sink.
“ARRR! That’s not going to do anything!” Vicky hollered.
“Will too!” Aaron said. “All the water will go down the drain, then this deck will be dry as a desert.”
“Aye, but more water keeps spilling in!” Gary said. By now, he was plugging one hole with each hand and one with his foot. He tried to plug another one with his nose, but it only made him sneeze.
“Avast!” Inna shouted. “I fixed one of them!” She was able to plug one little hole with her hair ribbon.
“Aye, good work!” I said. “We can use our socks to plug up the tiny leaks.”
“Aye, aye!” my mates shouted.
We took off our boots and shoved our socks into the tiny leaks. Then there was only the big hole left. But none of our socks were that big. Not even Rotten Tooth’s socks would’ve been big enough to plug that hole!
“Soggy sails!” Vicky said. “Now what?”
“I know!” Aaron said. “We’ll make another really big hole in the floor, then all the water will drain out!”
“You blunder head! That won’t fix anything!” Vicky argued. “The water will keep raining in from the other hole!”
Aaron scratched his head. “Aye? I guess you’re right,” he admitted.
“I know! If it’s raining, why don’t we use an umbrella?” Gary said.
“Arrr, that’s even dafter than Aaron’s plan!” Vicky said.
I wiped the water off my forehead and thought about Gary’s plan. “Arrr, maybe it’s not so daft,” I said.
“Aye?” Gary asked.
“Aye,” I said.
“Pete, I think maybe you’ve gone a little daft,” Aaron said.
“Not a chance,” I said. “We can make a funny kind of umbrella and put it over the outside of that big hole. The water trying to get in will pull it tight to the ship and seal the leak. Then the ship will stay afloat.”
“Aye! Just like when I have to patch up my pants whenever I tear them!” Gary said, and I nodded.
“Aye! It’s an emergency trick that I learned about on my old ship,” I said.
“That’s good thinking, Pete!” Vicky said.
“Aye,” Inna said. “But where are we going to find anything like that?”
“Aye, and how are we going to get to the outside of the ship?” Gary asked.
“Arrr, I haven’t figured that part out,” I said.
“I bet the cap’n can help,” Vicky said.<
br />
“Aye,” I said.
Even if Captain Dagger Dan didn’t run a tight ship, he was still a real live pirate captain. And if there was one thing a pirate captain knew, it was how to save his ship! So we hurried back to the main deck as quickly as a flock of electric eels!
The deck was crowded with singing pirates. It was hard work pushing and shoving our way over to the ship’s wheel, where the cap’n was.
“Captain, we have something very important to report,” I said, but he didn’t hear me. He was singing and shouting too loud.
“CAPTAIN!” Vicky yelled at the top of her lungs. She shouted so loud, I had to cover my ears, but the captain still didn’t notice.
That’s when Inna went up to him and tugged on his coat. Then she gave him a nudge. And when that didn’t work, she gave him a swift poke in his belly!
“QUIET!” the captain roared, and the whole crew hushed. “NOBODY POKES THE CAP’N!”
All eyes turned to us! Finally we had the crew’s attention!
“But Cap’n . . . we have to tell you something,” I said.
He looked us up and down.
“Blimey! Where have ye soggy sea pups been?” the cap’n asked. “You’re dripping from head to tail!”
“Arrr! ’Tis not safe to swim without letting the cap’n know,” Peg Leg Pedro scolded us. “I thought they would’ve taught ye that at Pirate School!”
Vicky put her hands on her hips and made a huff. “ARRR! We didn’t go swimming! We went belowdecks!”
“Belowdecks!” Captain Dan shouted. “But that would mean we sprung a leak!”
“That’s what we’ve been trying to tell you,” I explained.
Before I could say anything else . . . WHAM!
The Bone Rattler was struck on both sides! It got stuck between two huge rocks and stopped sailing!
Suddenly every pirate’s timbers started shaking and shivering. It was clear that the ship was sinking!
“Great stormy seas!” Captain Dagger Dan roared. “ALL HANDS ABANDON SHIP!”
Chapter 8
Stuck in a Rut
The pirates on the ship raced in every direction. Some pirates even started climbing up the rigging like a bunch of monkeys. But not a single pirate went overboard.