Flashback

by Dawn Carter

  What does that make me then? It was strange how much she and Spencer had in common. It had not been until they had relaxed enough to let their guards down and talk that she had felt a kinship with her. It was as if they were old friends who’d lost touch, then picked things right back up. Yet, she would never kiss an old friend the way she had kissed her. Not to say she had not lost a friend or two over the years for crossing the line. Mistakes she refused to repeat. When she’d first kissed Spencer, she could feel the spark between them—it had shot deep into her and found a home in her heart.

  “If this goes badly, I’m glad I got to know you.” Claire could see the swell of tears in Spencer’s eyes, and she smiled.

  “If this goes badly, would you care to join me in the afterlife?” she joked, but at the same time, it was an honest and heartfelt question.

  “I’d be honored.”

  They both smiled as they made their way through the temple and out of the main doors. Shamod sat atop the city wall and watched as the two women made their way across the town toward the desert. By his side, Hemed loomed over the last scroll.

  “Do you think they’ll return?”

  “They will, I’m sure of it. They might bring a guest with them.”

  “Yes, then it will not be they who return.”

  Shamod waved his hand. “Those stars above us. They return each night, but they are different as well. Something has touched them, changed them in such a way, that they no longer shine like they once had. In the same way, Claire and Spencer cannot help but be changed by this.”

  They both looked up. The moon appeared to be under siege by the stars. The never-ending blackness consumed everything except the stars, which stood out like pebbles in front of a storm. It was a perfect night for travel. The sand would be bathed in light, the North Star directing their journey.

  Shamod sighed. “May the gods guide them in their travels and keep them safe from what’s about to come.”

  ●●●

  By the time they reached the dig site, the sun had begun to rise in the east, and the searing yellow heat of the desert had begun to burn. From the back of the camel, Claire pointed in the direction of the old ruins. She witnessed the look of excitement upon Spencer’s face, and couldn’t wait to see, firsthand, the look in her eyes when she saw the place where Anai and Yiara were buried. It felt awkward referring to the women she had grown up knowing better than anyone else in her life, in third person. No matter what, Yiara and Anai would always be a part of her.

  Spencer followed close behind, and once inside, she dusted her feet off at the base of the imposing structure. “Wow,” she said softly, but her voice echoed, making it sound as if she yelled.

  “Be careful,” Claire said, gently taking Spencer’s hand in her own as she guided her down the shaft. Once they reached the bottom, she secured her backpack over her shoulder and held the flashlight in front of her.

  The walk through the ruins took up the remainder of the day, Claire making it a point to show Spencer everything she’d discovered. She hoped Spencer would be as thrilled by her discovery as she was, and she was not disappointed. Spencer was left speechless on more than one account, and when they entered the tomb, Spencer’s eyes became wide. There was a heartbeat of silence as she fell to her knees, and streams of tears flowed down her face.

  “Are you okay?”

  Spencer arched her head back and looked into the familiar eyes. “I can feel us both in there.”

  Claire felt as if someone had punched her in the chest; she struggled to breathe as she knelt down next to Spencer. “How did you know?”

  “I don’t know how, but I know. Does that make sense?”

  It was crazy, but Claire did understand; it was the same feeling she’d had when she first found the sarcophagus. “From what I’ve read,” she said, pointing to the etchings in the stone, “my former self had your body placed with mine upon my death.”

  A smile stretched Spencer’s lips. “That’s so romantic.”

  “It’s true love.”

  “Yes it is. Have you done a lot of research on their lives and what happened?”

  The question did not surprise her. Yiara would not have had any knowledge of what happened to Anai after she killed herself, so she would not have shared that with Spencer. “When you, I mean, Yiara, took her life, there was no longer an heir to the throne. Your father, I mean, Yiara’s father, ordered for my return and took me as his bride. He forced himself upon Anai, but he did not succeed in leaving her with child.” Talking about it was hard. She was Anai, Anai was her, and talking about her in first and third person was confusing. “From what I know, he died soon after, and Anai took over the throne.

  “That’s all I know from my dreams, but the rest of the story is told upon the sarcophagus. It reads, ‘I was saddened, heartbroken and alone. I missed my one and only true love. The kingdom had lost its luster, and my existence had vanished within the walls of the chamber I once shared with her. It is my twenty ninth year and my willingness to go on has gone. This here, is our eternal chamber, may the gods forgive us.’”

  “Oh my God, that’s so sad. So she killed herself?”

  “Yes, unfortunately, and it was not until last week that she shared with me how she died.”

  Startled by the statement, Spencer fixed her gaze upon Claire’s profile. “You are talking about the dreams, right?”

  There was no verbal confirmation, just the up and down motion of her head. “I drank something, and I could feel the sinking feeling until everything went black.”

  “That must have been horrible.”

  She turned her head away and cringed. “No, I felt at peace then, the worst part for me was when HE put his hands upon me. I would wake each time smelling him.”

  “I can understand that. The thing that got me the most was when YOU were being taken away from me. I felt helpless.”

  “That was right after your father ordered you to talk to him. I remember that. As soon as the door closed behind you, I walked to the balcony and looked over the land. I fell to my knees and prayed the gods would stop him, but then the guards rushed through the doors and forced me to leave.” It felt good to stop referring to what she experienced in third person. It might have happened in her former life, but she was the one who relived it every night.

  Looking down at her trembling hands, Spencer said softly, “When they took you away, Ahmose, the man my father gave me to, came into my room and forced me to leave with him. I couldn’t imagine my life without you, and there was no way I would allow him to stain my skin with his.”

  “From what I read, it wasn’t clear what happened. Did you take your life, or did someone else?”

  “I took the blade from his boot and plunged it into my torso. I’m not sure if I died right away, or if I lingered, but I do remember cursing him and the land for taking you from me.”

  The love Claire witnessed in Spencer’s eyes in that moment took her breath away. “I’ve loved you all my life.” She leaned in. With one hand, she brushed the hair away from Spencer’s neck, and with the other, she pulled her in close. Minty breath mingled only a few seconds before Claire bruised Spencer’s lips with her own. She had made love to her so many times in her dreams, but to hold her now, to feel her body pressed against her own was like nothing she had ever experienced. She wanted to take Spencer right there, to make love with her, and taste her forbidden fruit, but it was not the right time. They had so much to do and to set up before their counterparts would join them. She shuddered at the thought, and considered what they had discussed. What if they didn’t survive it? Would she be passing on a little piece of heaven?

  “I want you!” she mumbled.

  Spencer pulled back, her heart pounding loud in her ears. “I want you too, but I don’t want you like this. I would rather wait and make sure it is not them that have us feeling this way. I want to know once this is all over that you want me for me.”

  “Okay, we’ll wait, but nothing will cha
nge the way I feel for you.”

  ●●●

  By nightfall, they were both exhausted. Neither had slept much the night before, and whatever energy they had was diminishing by the minute. The climb back up to the surface was long, so Claire gave Spencer the option to either set up their sleeping bags inside the structure, or make the long journey back to the top to rest in her tent. The latter did not appeal to either, and within minutes, they were stretched out on the floor, Spencer with her head nestled in the crick of Claire’s neck.

  In her ear, Claire whispered, “Sweet dreams, Yiara.”

  Spencer closed her eyes and sighed deeply before meeting Claire’s gaze. She hesitated; “Sweet dreams, Anai.” How strange it was to call her that. Concern filled her belly. She was most afraid that they would get lost in the history that had brought them together, and that their current selves would get lost. Spencer knew then she’d made the right decision not to make love to Claire that night.

  Chapter 18

  As Claire looked down upon the sleeping figure, her heart felt full. From the first moment she had laid eyes upon Spencer, she had felt like she was home. “Time to wake up.”

  “Mm, what time is it?” Flat on her back, Spencer stretched her long legs and opened her eyes. Claire was sitting over her. “Hey you, how did you sleep?”

  For a second, Claire thought about the question. She had fallen fast asleep, and for the first time in years, she did not wake up through the night, or dream. “It was the best sleep I’ve had in forever.”

  Several yawns later, Claire pulled herself up off the hard surface. She was sure she was going to be sore, but surprisingly, she was not. It did not take long for them to gather their stuff and put it all back in the bags. They had twelve hours before the planets would be aligned, and neither knew what to expect. If these were to be their last hours together, she wanted to make sure they were memorable. It would only take an hour to set everything up, but they still had to get the sarcophagus opened and disturb the corpses.

  All for what, she thought. They were risking an awful lot for two people who had already had their chance. They could simply walk away from it and entertain a relationship with one another, guilt free and happy. Yet, she couldn’t, as much as she wanted to; she could not walk away and leave Yiara and Anai to suffer, no matter the cost.

  While watching Claire fumble through a few items in her backpack, Spencer rubbed her grumbling belly. “How about breakfast?” Claire rolled her eyes up. “Okay, and then I’ll need your help to move the top of the sarcophagus and to break the seal on their casket.”

  “Oh, yeah, gross.”

  Claire laughed. Spencer looked adorable the way she shriveled up her nose and puckered her lips. When the light from the lantern danced along her profile just right, Claire thought she looked almost angelic.

  ●●●

  “Just close your eyes.” As soon as Spencer closed her eyes tightly, Claire jabbed the tip of the knife into her finger.

  “Ouch, I thought you said it wouldn’t hurt?”

  “No, I said it wouldn’t hurt for long.”

  “Tit for tat, lady,” she said as she eyed the droplets filling the amulet. Then she rolled her eyes up to Claire’s. “Time to stick your hand. It’s my turn.”

  “I got it.”

  “Oh no, I got it.” Before Claire could object, she stabbed the knife into Claire’s finger with a little extra force. Of course, she would not admit that to Claire.

  “Hey now, that hurt.”

  “I’ll kiss it better when you’re done.”

  Claire raised her brow; Spencer immediately knew what she was thinking.

  ●●●

  As the time grew near, they waited, standing with the little lights flickering around them.

  “Our blood is your blood is our blood.” Claire chanted the words she’d transcribed from the scroll. At first, she thought nothing was going to happen, then the lights flickered.

  They watched as two orbs floated overhead, growing until they started to take shape. Before them, two translucent figures, exact replicas of themselves, floated just above the ground only feet from them.

  Taken aback, Spencer’s mouth fell open. They had no physical bodies, having died long ago, but they were starting to appear solid. Breaking out of the hold her mind had on her, Spencer ran a hand through her hair, looking almost haggard. She blinked once, twice, and again.

  “What now?”

  Their former selves, who had died in honor, stood now, looking upon them. Claire shook her head, signaling she also was unsure what to do.

  “I don’t know.”

  Anai looked upon them, then turned her gazed to Yiara. “My love, it is you. I’ve waited hundreds of lifetimes to see you again.”

  “Anai, it is you.” Yiara rushed as fast as she could, but when she attempted to embrace her lost love, their translucent forms could not touch. She looked upon her love, and sadness filled her eyes. After several seconds, she turned her attention to the exact duplicate of herself. “You have freed us.” She bowed her head. “We are forever in your debt.”

  Neither Spencer nor Claire spoke, they both stood transfixed upon the ghostly figures standing before them.

  Yiara’s eyes filled with grief after reaching out her hand to touch Anai once more. “I have waited so long to hold you in my arms, my love, and yet I cannot. Death is not kind, it plays a cruel joke; it will have to be enough to spend eternity with you.”

  It was obvious that they were indeed spirits, and being so, they were able to occupy the same space. Spencer had gleaned a little knowledge from reading so many books over the years, and wondered just how true a few of the things were. She cleared her throat and stepped forward. She felt bad for the two lovers. It was hard watching them desperately fail when needing to find comfort in one another’s arms. Yet, the concern she felt for her and Claire’s safety and future was also in the forefront of her mind.

  “Even though I’m looking at you, it’s hard to believe the two of you are here and real. I have so many questions. Yiara, I’ve dreamt of you all my life,” Spencer’s voice cracked. “I’ve seen what you’ve seen, felt what you felt. Now what is going to happen to us since we brought you two back together?”

  Yiara waved her hand in a pacifying manner. “You have fulfilled the prophecy. It’s time to let you pass on into the afterlife, there will be no need to come back.”

  Spencer had not even realized she had taken another step forward, her body tensed. “I don’t understand? Are you saying our life on this Earth is coming to an end?”

  Yiara didn’t respond, instead she turned her gaze away.

  “We had little choice in life, and we have less in death. You have fulfilled your roles in ending our curse.” Anai’s voice broke the silence. “It’s time for you to find peace.”

  Claire flushed prettily with anger. “All our lives, we’ve lived your nightmare, and now you’re saying that’s it? Don’t we have a choice?”

  Yiara raised an eyebrow and smiled. “Destiny is not a choice. If you have found true love through one another, and it’s not forming from our union, the gods will smile upon you. Your forms on this Earth are safe—we wish you no harm.”

  It broke Spencer’s heart to witness the yearning in Yiara’s eyes as she looked at Anai. In her dreams, they had made love, held one another hundreds of times, and now, reunited, they couldn’t even kiss. After meeting Claire, she couldn’t imagine never kissing her lips again. All her life she wished to belong, to be with someone who captured her heart. If she could, if it were possible, she would offer to let Yiara take over her body and have one last moment with Anai. The thought made her smile.

  “Claire, I got a question for you.”

  Claire said nothing as she followed Spencer to the other side of the tomb.

  “I’m not sure if they’ll be able to, but what would you think, if we let them use us so they can be together in physical form one last time?”

  Her eyes smiled. �
��Great minds think alike.” Holding her hand up, Claire stepped back into the spot in front of them. “We would like you to use us, if you’re able to.”

  “Use you. What kind of trickery are you talking?”

  Spencer stepped beside Claire and held her hand out to Yiara. “You can take over my body, have one last moment with Anai before you have to go.”

  “I’m a little nervous.” Claire whispered.

  “Me too.”

  ●●●

  The two lovers took a moment to discuss the offer. There would be consequences from taking possession of another’s body. In this case, it could have a negative impact on their doppelgangers decision to be together. Yiara was sure that if they were destined to become one, nothing would change that. It had been so long, and her need to once again become one with her lover took precedence. Yiara reached for the extended hand, Spencer retracted it and her eyes grew sad.

  “Is this not what you want, Spencer?”

  Spencer lowered her gaze. “I’m sorry, it startled me. It felt like the warmth was being sucked from me.” She took a deep breath. “Okay, I’m ready.”

  Without delay, Anai and Yiara both stepped into their doppelgangers’ bodies. At first, Anai was not sure it had taken hold, but when she opened her eyes and lifted her hand, she felt the soft skin of her lover.

  “Yiara,” her voice low and loving. “My love.” Without delay, Anai took Yiara in her arms and devoured the mouth beneath her own.

  “Oh, Anai, how I have missed your touch.” This was their last chance to be together, and Yiara was not going to allow a minute of it to go to waste.

  In the dark, in the cold tomb, they held one another only feet from where their wrapped corpses lay in death. Life flowed through their hosts’ veins, pumping hard in their chests. Yiara welcomed Anai’s touch, closing her eyes as gentle, delicate fingers brushed over her curves. She was lost in passion, and had forgotten that the bodies they were possessing would have total recall of what they were about to do.