Emotionless: (Prototype: Zero book 1)

by Shaina Anastasi

  Outside of the lounge room and down the hallway, there was a metal plate on one of the doors before the staircase that says library. Shaking the handle, I heard a click, except that it wasn’t the handle that made the noise. Firm cold steel pressed against my temple, so I let my eyes flicker towards them but only noticed the frame. Apparently female.

  “Keep the door closed or else I will blow your unconscious fucking brains out!” she hissed. I obliged and lifted the handle so that it went back into place. “Now, rem –” her voice was abruptly cut off as I grabbed the wrist that held the gun to my head, twisted it around to her back, slammed her into the wall beside the door and raised my free hand. Fingernails turned into sharpened claws, and I let them rest at the nape of her neck. She craned her head up to the ceiling with the motion. “You’re here to find Eileen, right?”

  “Obviously,” I answered. “Who are you?”

  “Who do you think,” she made a sour face and then said. “Elijah called me not long ago. He wanted me to delve deeper into her mind to find a face.”

  “Where’s Eileen?” I demanded.

  “Tsk. I don’t know what she sees in you,” muttering, she shrugged me off of her easily and turned towards the staircase. She looked different to the Valkyrie she is known for. She was dressed casually, and her hair that was always down, like a Valkyrie’s is supposed to be, was tied up into a high ponytail. “I have been following the open doors.”

  “Why are you following her? I don’t trust you. You’re known as a mage killer. Why are you collaborating with the stupid hare?”

  “I do not need to answer you. You have nothing to hold against me. You’re not my Master,” She growled. As she straightened up, her eyes stared at the gun that was now on the ground. “Do you know anything about, Eileen. Her past. Her emotions. I have walked this hallway a thousand times, and one thing I found the same was her lack of expression, inwards and outwards. Have you wondered why?”

  “I don’t really care for this conversation, and I don’t know why you care either if you’re only here because the hare is holding something against you to follow his orders,” I admitted as I followed behind her after she picked the gun up once more and started towards the stairs. “As long as I can bring Eileen back in one piece, I don’t care how she got to where she is now.”

  “Really?” Valeria the last turned and cocked an eyebrow from the top of the stairs. “You will be eating your words very soon, dragon. For that is precisely where Eileen is going.”

  “Where?”

  “To the principal reason why she has no emotions.”

  “You’re confusing as shit,” I growled. “You make her sound like . . .”

  “A droid?” she grinned. “Would you like her if all her emotions joined together?”

  “No, probably not,” I answered honestly. “I like how she is now. If she did have her emotions, she would be like Donte and Nixon, and I can’t help but hate them.”

  “What if she was exactly like them before the incident,” Valeria laughed bitterly.

  “I don’t care for this small talk. Have you found anything interesting?”

  “She was attacked in the middle of the night. They slipped a strong memory potion down her throat.”

  “What?” I snapped. My teeth were grinding along each other. “Who?” I took a step up. My anger was getting the best of me. “Who attacked her?”

  “How should I know?” Valeria snapped. “It was dark and Eileen’s fault for sneaking out trying to find me on her own. Someone jumped her and was whispering, ‘remember. Remember what you put me through’ and shoved memory potion down her throat and then carried her back into her room and onto her bed. She woke remembering nothing. I was surprised she woke at all, and that is what made her sick. The memories of her past that her parents erased came crawling back up and . . .” she trailed off and snapped her head down another hallway and narrowed her eyes. “She killed another one.”

  “Who? Killed what?” I asked. Leaning down the hallway, I noticed that there was a door that was open while the others were closed. “I’m going to follow.”

  “Will you be okay to go alone. You cannot use your veins in memories.”

  “I am adaptable,” I said as I curled my lip. “I am going to find Eileen. Just tell me where to go and leave her memories.”

  “Alright. Just follow the doors that are open, and you will catch up to her. I will clean up her mess before I leave.”

  “What mess?”

  “You haven’t noticed?” she asked, surprised. Furrowing brows, I found this conversation grating on the nervous system. I shook head slowly at her question. “Turn around.”

  Annoyed, I turned around towards downstairs and felt my eyes widen the slightest, as chills ran up my spine. As if my eyes removed the foggy haze I was under. There was a sprawl of dead bodies, Eileen of all ages going down the hallway and staircase.

  “She’s afraid. I know it isn’t any excuse for killing yourself repeatedly, but she is only finding out that all her life she has been lied to and with no escape, and having to endure these memories can take a toll even on the most tolerant of mages.”

  “Yes, and shooting yourself makes it much better,” I said dryly. “Is that why you have the gun. You took it from her?” she nodded firmly. “Where would she get it from?”

  “Another memory. One that isn’t particularly hers. Also, they are an escape. Close a door to one, and there can be silence before opening the door to another.” She went to turn around when she paused and then gave me a polished look. “It wasn’t your fault. What Eileen’s father said about if you keep it up, you will lose Eileen for good. You’re doing a pretty good job, considering you’re a hostile dragon with interesting boots.”

  Ugh, that is something she would say.

  I went to ask how she knows so much about Eileen, but as soon as I blinked, the last Valkyrie was gone. With a deep sigh, I went to the open the door to find my Eileen.

  So far, as I trail after the open doors to find Eileen, is that right now she is having a psychotic breakdown. She’s opening the doors that have been locked in her mind and is dealing with the lies and deceit her family has foreshadowed her in. However, this all seemed to have gotten chaotic because the fucking idiot of a droid decided to sneak out when I told her I would help her talk to Valeria. My helping may have consisted of avoiding the psychotic creature at all costs and tried getting Eileen back on track with finding her grandfather. Unfortunately, she would rather know why she is so emotionless. Can’t necessarily blame her, but fear for the fact that she is going god damn crazy because of it.

  Opening up another door, I stumbled out of the library and onto wooden chips of bark and the overpowering smell of pine. The warm breeze and bright sun shined from above me. I was standing in a park, and at a children’s playset that was separated into various sections.

  “Shhh, Eileen told us to be careful. We don’t wanna be lizards. Only big brother,” Donte or Nixon, one of them spoke.

  I can tell them apart when they’re older because one of them looks more of an idiot when he talks. Here, instead of Nixon that was looking like a fool, they both look like idiots that were being manipulated to do Eileen’s own bidding.

  This is the first memory that I have seen where there wasn’t a dead Eileen and actual mages, even knowing it had to be these dimwits. If they’re here, she must be here as well. Darting eyes around, they swept the perimeter and then froze at a mage I had never seen before that was standing with the hare. They were looking towards Isilies who was scavenging for rocks. Donte and Nixon were creeping from behind.

  Hare was talking to the man with greying brown hair adamantly. There was a twinkle in his eyes. Admiration. The man has the same silver eyes and brownish hair as the Frost children. If I am not mistaken, he must be Gospel Frost. Since there was no sign of Eileen, I decided to listen and observe the adults.

  “Donte and Nixon have a reptile potion,” the Hare said in a clear tone of voice. “
Should I stop them?”

  Gospel Frost nodded once.

  The hare moved towards the twins when they looked up and instantly freaked out. One of them demanded the other just to throw it at Isilies, and as the older brother turned around slowly, the one with the potion splashed the greenish-brown liquid towards both. I assume accidentally. A little went along the extended arm of the one pointing at Isilies while saying, ‘throw it.’ The rest went on Isilies, so he turned into a reptile faster. A tail was already flopping on the ground.

  The hare and Gospel Frost moved towards them while my eyes connected to a sectioned off area to the right. Ignoring the argumentative voices of annoying children, I went towards the sandpit. A hissing sigh escaped lips. In the sandpit was a little girl. Her hands were scooping up sand and patting it down into a pile. On the other side of her was Eileen. She was sitting with her legs tucked up and arms wrapped around them. She looked emotionally drained. Her eyes didn’t have the spark I am usually used to seeing behind the mask.

  “Your mind is pretty screwed up, droid,” I mused.

  “Ok.”

  “Ok, you agree with me, or just ok? Question.”

  “Ok.”

  “Eileen, if you’re lapsing back into silence, fine, but do it outside of your fucking head so I can sleep peacefully back in the classroom.”

  “I don’t want to go home, Lawliet,” she whispered. Eileen’s silver eyes moved up, and I couldn’t help but soften my expression at the wavering emotions of despair inside of hers. “I don’t want to stay here either. All they do is smile and are happy, and I can’t remember any of it. It started to make me angry, and whenever I thought something bad to happen to them, she would come and kill them.”

  “She?”

  “The girl with the gun.”

  “Valeria?”

  “So, it was her. Why is she still hiding from me?”

  Balling hands into fists, I ground teeth and furrowed brows. I narrowed them further into contortion with my own burst of anger. How can I be so fucking stupid? The stupid child Mika taught me to be suspicious of anyone, even if you see yourself.

  ‘The mind is an open place, Lawliet. Remember in the mage world, master mages can easily slip in your mind, and manipulate appearance and corrupt your sanity on the inside. So, if that ever happens, tormenting the shit out of them is fun.’ Mika’s words echoed, the annoyance of my ignorance was made clear, as I watched Eileen sitting with her child self and was drawing in the sand. Exhaustion weary on her face. However, this time I believed the lie of someone I don’t trust because I thought that Eileen’s mindset is too unstable to trust on a level-headed base.

  “Alright,” I reached for her arm. She stood and brushed sand from her nightgown.

  Rubbing eyes as a child would, she then reached her hand out to cling onto the bottom of my shirt to follow. Moving away from the girl, I flickered a glance to the hare and Gospel Frost through the break in the trees. They were pointing towards the direction that the child Eileen was seated at and was building a sandcastle. I then looked back to Eileen that was drowsily walking and dragging her feet through the blades of grass.

  Far enough away from the girl, I went into my pocket to grab the crystal . . .

  “Gears of time,” I said as I darted my eyes back and confirmed that Eileen has disappeared from behind me. I spun around to search. The hare was trying to break up the altercation with a half lizard Isilies, and Nixon and Donte. Gospel Frost was moving towards the empty sandpit. Why is the sandpit empty?

  Racing towards the sandpit, on the other side is a narrow path that leads towards the road. Eileen, who was beside me, was running down that path and was following someone. Running after her, I got to the sandpit when Gospel was standing by it, eyes wide and face pale, as he murmured a name, I believe it was Eileen. Jumping over the sandpit, I slammed down, reached into the back pocket and took out a silver crystal with a strand of brown hair wrapped around it.

  “Eileen Frost,” I spoke, then threw the crystal and it shattered on impact right in front of me.

  A twinkling blinding light in a shape of an oval portal came into focus. On the other side of it, there was an arm I instantly grabbed. She wasn’t overly surprised with my forcefulness because I doubt she realised I was there. Her eyes were glued to the black slim Mercedes door that was now in front of us both. Lifting the other crystal, I went to crush it, to get back to reality when it was gone. Eyes moving towards it, Eileen had the crystal between fingertips while the other hand had the door handle.

  It was a click of the door and blinding white light that seeped over us within a flash, as we warped into another memory.

  ‘You will find out soon, how frightening Eileen Frost really is, hatchling,’

  Chapter 37.

  Eileen – in memory of me.

  “Ouch,” I murmured, as the blinding white light disintegrated and I ended up falling forward into the overwhelming darkness.

  Forearms dragged along the ground and scraped against hard thick slabbed cement. Shuffling into the kneeling position, I blinked into black and at the dazed coloured spots in the corner of vision. I looked around and hoped to make out something. It smells of iron. Rusty metal scent that I am reminded of from my dream awhile back. I recall it, but the memory is too blurry to understand how that smell is familiar to me.

  A noise to the right of me alerted my senses, as Lawliet crouched beside me. His veins were the only light, as he glowered at me with profound hate. Raising hand mechanically, robotically, I dropped the crystal that was clutched in my hand into his open palm. Unfortunately, it was broken into two pieces and was not glowing with magic. It made him even angrier, as he turned the crystal into powder from clutching it tightly.

  Opening mouth, about to speak, there was a rattling of chains that made a cold shiver glide down my spine. Slowly turning head, the liquid blue light moved like ink into a rune on the ground. It shined so brightly that the whole - basement I assume - lit up with the glowing blue rune. It revealed a small girl that was chained to the ground with dirt and scratch marks along her ankles and fingertips. As the blue rune began activating in a dome shape around her, the shadow of a man stood not that far away. His face contorted but meshed with shadows, incapable of seeing whom it really is.

  How did I get into this memory? I ended up turning around as if I felt a presence watching me, which seemed impossible at the time. Considering every memory that I walked into, they didn’t acknowledge my presence. Whenever Valeria came and was raising the gun to the younger version of me, I felt guilty for not feeling pity or sadness, as she shot myself. It was inking out the laughter and joy with comfortable silence. The last time was an exception. A strange calling that was telling me to follow them. Honeycomb eyes shined brightly, a lure, as he walked with the younger version of me down the path to the entrance of the park street. I was curious. I wanted to know why the boy glanced at me, smiled, and then walked. I wanted to know why I smiled stupidly. A naïve girl I was. Friendly towards everyone down to the bone.

  Is this the reason I changed? How I turned emotionless.

  I had to know, so I ran. I forgot about the hostile dragon and how angry he would be as I ran. Grateful that he followed, because at this given moment, I am frightened at what I am about to witness, with my own eyes, through my memories.

  The dome rune snapped into place from above, the veins of magic were climbing up it and were forming multiple, no, hundreds of smaller versions of the one on the ground. The flicker of the D curved and swept around the entire rune with strange spiked brackets that were twisting horrifically around and through it. It was the symbol of death. How strange to know of that, as Eileen looked up, almost attracted to the shape. She was in complete awe and fear as her hand moved, a flicker of a second. Then everything turned twisted.

  Thin needle-like spikes moved from inside every small rune that was turning slowly. The mage outside, I recall, the churning of the stomach made me remember that smirk of satisfaction, as
he watched a Highborn witnessing the horror of death through small eyes.

  When they shot down, all hundreds of them in various direction moved. There was a sickening in my stomach, and there was thumping in my heart at the intake of a breathless exhaled laugh. She looked up, directly at the mage from outside and lifted her finger. With a single blink, a flash of blue erupted, spikes pierced down and collided together in the dome. The surface of it was clustered with them. Blue smoke cleared, thinned down into a simmer and in that rune, was a male figure. Smooth Crimson was coating the small spikes. He started to spasms, as the spikes honed on the mark.

  Through the darkness and the outer line of the blue rune, she stepped forward. She didn’t register fear or anything traumatic one would expect someone to have. She was calm, almost too calm. Giving a sidelong glance at Lawliet who stood beside me, his face was incredibly passive. He wasn’t hinting anything, which worried me more because he always has a flicker of some type of emotion.

  Raising her left hand delicately, as if she wanted the weak nearly dead mage to kiss it tenderly, she looked up, as expressionless as everyone else did. He was wheezing, as blood dribbled out of his mouth, down his jaw and was dripping with saliva along the trail of it that was running down the break of the circle rune and was touching Eileen’s bare feet. He was dying and was struggling to stay alive, as tears ran down. He was the one who was afraid. Afraid of this little seven-year-old mage who seems to understand the predicament she was in and how she got in it. This mage knew, and the look in the watery, bloodshot Lowborn mages eyes confirmed it as well. She was the bait, and like simple-minded fish, targeted in, not knowing that the bait was the lure, and she lured them into the most disturbing trap of all. Revenge.

  Why? Why did I look as if I hated Lowborn’s so much?

  I never have, that I can remember, hated Lowborn’s, even after knowing the betrayal. Yes, sometimes I dislike mages that act similar to what I knew the Lowborn acted at the betrayal as if we made them like that. This girl, however, is a mage I wouldn’t want to see again, and that is saying something, considering I am she.