Breaking Elle

by Antoinette Candela

  “Fuck you. Let’s fucking play. I’m gonna wipe your ass on this court.” Tyler chuckles as he bounces the ball to Cane who then fakes him out to the basket and goes untouched for a layup.

  There’s a lot of pushing and shoving through the whole game, but it really escalates when Cane mans-up on me.

  “Hey, cowboy,” he says sarcastically, his hands on his hips as he catches his breath. “Didn’t take you long, did it?” I wipe the sweat off my forehead and focus on him, ignoring his comment for the moment. He fucked up and he has no right to come pushing up on me like this. Heaving the ball into his chest harder than necessary, he bounces it back to me once. I dribble towards the basket, and he pushes me hard, elbowing me in the ribs and slapping the ball from my hands as I go up to make the shot.

  “Long for what?” I huff. I know what’s up. Shit, I’d be one pissed motherfucker if my friend made a move on my girl, but that’s not the way it went down. He made his bed; he needs to lie in it. No man in his right mind would not want to be with her. He just needs to deal with his mistake.

  “Don’t play dumb.” He takes a step to me. Looks like the game is over as Tyler and Jace are in position if anything gets out of hand. This is obviously between him and me now.

  “You wanted her from that first day, the night you took her to that damn park. You had your eye on her all along, man. Didn’t you?”

  What do I do? Tell him. Does it matter? It’s all out in the open now. Jace has probably told him everything. If I wanted her then or any other moment, we would still end up here at some point. He just gave me the opening I needed.

  “Don’t blame anyone but yourself for fucking up with her.” I explain. All I am doing is stating the obvious but he isn’t having it. It happens so fast, I don’t expect this coming from him. His fist flies around and connects with my jaw. The blow has me staggering backwards. I taste the blood on my lip, and I wipe it away with the back of my hand. Recovering rapidly, I glare at him as the sweat is pouring off my skin and stinging my eyes. I lunge at him, tackle him to the court, and land a punch to his face. He grunts, rolls over, and gets to his feet. I pop back up. Panting in fervor, he comes after me a second time. Jace holds him back, Cane’s veins popping out of his neck and his face twitching with rage.

  “Cane, man, come on.” Cane pushes Jace’s hands away and turns to me.

  “Fuck, man.” He cringes, rubbing his chin, blood trickling from his nose. Tyler stands off to the side half-smiling at the whole thing, probably wishing he could have gotten one in himself. Tyler calmly walks over to me, scanning my face, and then looks over at Cane. He’s chuckling under his breath and enjoying the situation too much.

  “You all right, man?” He asks.

  “Yeah, fine.” I reply. I flick my eyes back up at Cane who’s staring at me. I grab my t-shirt, wiping the blood off my face.

  “Bullshit!” he says in frustration. “Fuck!” He jams his hands through his hair and paces back and forth. “Sorry, man. I don’t know what got into me.”

  I know what got into him. He lost a great girl, but I can’t and won’t let this change anything that may be happening with Elle and me. His loss. “Listen,” I say, “Elle, doesn’t need to know about what just happened here. You agree?” I ask. “I don’t think she’d want us fighting like this.”

  “Yeah,” he replies, nodding his head in agreement. “She wouldn’t.”

  “Cool,” I answer, knowing that things between Cane and me just changed in a big way,

  “I guess the game’s over.” Tyler laughs.

  “Just don’t hurt her like I did,” he explains, rubbing his forehead in disappointment. “Biggest mistake of my life,” he whispers as he grabs the ball. Jace raises his eyes to me and frowns, looking at me likes he’s trying to figure me out, but I turn away, grab my bag, and head off the court. I knew that he would be a problem from the jump. I need to keep my interactions with him to a minimum, but he’s persistent.

  “No hard feelings, man,” I say, looking over my shoulder, thinking to myself that I may have made my first enemy in Beantown and that I needed to put some distance between Elle’s brother and me.

  My phone blows up all week with texts from Jace telling me how he doesn’t trust Reed, that there’s something about him that makes him nervous. I don’t respond to any of his texts. I am working and spending time with Reed, and I’m not in the mood for whatever agenda my brother has. I don’t know what he’s trying to do or if this has anything with him trying to get Cane and me back together. I’m really sick and tired of it.

  Damn phone again.

  Tyler: U home?

  Elle: Yep and Why?

  Tyler: Need to talk to you about your man.

  Elle: Don’t start with me. I’m in a mood.

  Tyler: Relax. ;) B there in 5.

  Geez, can’t a girl get a break? I like him. Isn’t that enough? Apparently not when it comes to Jace and Tyler. Sure enough, I don’t even have time to change and Tyler’s here.

  “Hey, are you up there?” Tyler yells from the bottom of the stairs

  “Yeah, give me a minute. I’ll be right down,” I yell, throwing on a pair of old shorts and a tank top. I pull my hair back in a ponytail and grab my cell. I just got off work, and I want to relax before Reed picks me up to go to his place. I run down the stairs and find Tyler in the kitchen rummaging through the fridge.

  “Well, why don’t you make yourself at home?” I joke, resting my elbows on the kitchen counter and admiring his broad shoulders and the muscles flexing in his arms with each of his movements. He must be hitting the gym religiously. Holy crap, what am I doing? It’s Tyler, my best friend, for God sakes. I shake my head. No one said that your best friend couldn’t be hot.

  “Thanks,” he replies sarcastically as he continues to peruse. “Hey, why the heck you got a bottle of whiskey in here?” He whips around with bottled water in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. “You trying to make my infamous Long Island Ice Tea?” He laughs, lifting his brow.

  I don’t know what to say. All I notice is that the whiskey bottle is half-full. I snatch the bottle from his hand and pour what’s left down the kitchen sink. My mom’s losing it. She would never do something like that unless she was so drunk she didn’t know what the hell she was doing.

  “Your drink needed five shots, right?” I reply, throwing the bottle in the trash. I turn to face him. “So, the experiment wouldn’t work.” I wince, angry, and scared at the same time.

  “What did you do that for?” He asks incredulously. “You could have asked me if I wanted it.”

  “Empty calories.” I can’t get the image of my mom out of my head.

  “So anyway, Pops said you stopped by the other day.”

  “Yes. I’m glad I did.”

  “Yeah, I knew something was up that day when I heard him whistling in the kitchen. Pops misses you being around.” He chuckles, taking a gulp of water from the bottle.

  “Really?” I laugh softly, leaning my elbows on the counter. “I miss him, too. I told him I would be stopping by more often.”

  “Yeah, you obviously don’t know the effect you have on some people.” Tyler smiles wistfully.

  “I can drive people crazy sometimes.” I stand up and clear my throat, fully aware of what he means. “So, what did you want talk to me about?”

  “Your new man,” He says, dropping his eyes to his feet.

  “What about him?” I frown, folding my arms across my chest.

  “What do you know about him?” he asks, flicking his eyes back up at me.

  He’s an awesome kisser, and he’s gorgeous as hell.

  “What’s this about?” I respond, impatiently raising my eyebrow, inwardly cringing.

  He frowns up at the ceiling. I know when he wants to talk about something that may piss me off. It starts with that frown and then he kind of scratches his head, like now, without looking at me and he does this sighing thing, a couple times and then speaks.

  “I ju
st overheard him at work today talking about some friends from back home that he got in touch with on Facebook. Sounded kind of weird.” He shrugs. “I don’t know. Just wondering how much you know about this guy.” He leans against the counter, running his hand through his hair.

  “What the hell?” I’m irate, feeling the anger just bubbling inside of me. “It’s been less than a month. He doesn’t know much about me, either.”

  “Yeah, but it’s different. Nobody here knows him. It’s like he appeared out of the blue.”

  “What? You think he’s some kind of criminal? Should I be watching America’s Most Wanted to make sure? Have you forgotten that people all over the country go to college here? He’s going to grad school for shit’s sake.” I take a deep breath, trying to keep my composure. “Listen, I know you’re just looking out for me, but it’s all right. I can take care of myself.”

  “I didn’t come here to piss you off or anything,” he says, scratching his head anxiously.

  “I know that. I’m getting shit from Jace, too,” I reply, dropping my shoulders, tired of talking about how no one seems to trust Reed.

  “I don’t blame him.” He shrugs and sits at the bar. “Another thing. The whole blackjack thing the other night...” He lowers his head and stares at his hands.

  “What about it? You got another theory about that one, too?” I retort, reaching for a strand of hair to attack.

  “Come on. Just hear me out, all right” He huffs. “Something was weird about the whole thing. The other guys, something was off. I don’t know. I’m not sure if he isn’t in some kind of trouble.”

  “What are you talking about?” I reply, shaking my head in frustration.

  “It came out when we were playing cards the other night, something about owing someone money, then he asked me to go to Mohegan Sun for a weekend.”

  “Big deal. You owe me money.” I laugh. “That doesn’t mean anything and everyone goes to the casino.”

  “Listen; just be careful, all right. You don’t know anything about this guy. He’s cool and all, but everyone has a past,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck.

  I stare at him, my jaw slack not knowing what to say. God, now I wish I didn’t pour that whiskey down the drain. I hear the familiar sound of my phone and angrily snatch it from the counter anticipating another message from my brother, but it’s a text from Reed.

  Reed: Can’t wait 2 c u.

  Elle: Me 2.

  I smile, thinking about him my body tingles with anticipation. “Thanks for the warning.”

  “Was that him?” He flicks his neck at me eyeing my phone that I’m gripping too tightly.

  “Yes.” I retort, tilting my head.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way.” Rising from the stool, he steps closer to me. He places his strong hands on my shoulders, looking at me with those eyes as he leans into me, his breath warm and sweet. For a moment, I think he’s going to kiss me, and for whatever reason, I don’t back away. My heart’s jumping wildly in my chest. I close my eyes, sensing his warm body next to mine, finally feeling his soft lips on my forehead where they linger longer than anticipated. He reluctantly backs away. “Just be careful,” he whispers. For a moment, I expected more, wanted more but Tyler knows better. He always knows what I want, but not this time. Thank God he didn’t.

  This is crazy. My conversation with Tyler was a little upsetting to say the least and then the almost kiss. What the hell was I expecting? I just got sucked up in the moment, pissed off that everyone is coming down on Reed, and loving the way Tyler looks out for me. Everyone’s so quick to judge him now that I’m dating him, but before all of this, no one could get enough of him. He was this great guy, now he’s become everyone’s worst enemy.

  What exactly did Reed say today that made Tyler uneasy? I boot up my laptop and login to my Facebook account, and type in his name. Several profiles come up with the same name but nothing for him. I type in several combinations that he could use, but I still come back with nothing. Maybe he is using a fake account. Oh my god, Elle, now you’re doing it. You’re getting sucked in. Grabbing my cell phone I text him. I need to see him.

  Elle: I’m ready, babe.

  Reed: That’s what I like 2 hear. doll. ;)

  Elle: I’m the impatient type, get here ASAP.

  Reed: Patience is a virtue, but in this case it doesn’t matter. On my way!;)

  Smiling, I dial my mom’s cell phone. After finding the bottle of whiskey in the fridge, I know that things with my mom are not getting better. Her phone rings a couple times before she picks up and I can hear conversations in the background.

  “Hello, Mom?”

  “Elle, honey?” Her voice is soft and restrained, and I can hear the clinking of glasses.

  “Where are you?”

  “Work function.” She replies with an unsteady voice.

  “Another one?” I don’t believe her. “Have you been drinking?”

  “Elle.” She sighs heavily.

  ‘Mom, I found a bottle of whiskey in the fridge!” I grimace, so pissed at her.

  She’s silent. It’s obvious that she doesn’t remember and that she can’t tell me she’s not drinking anymore. “Mom, this is not healthy. I’m worried about you.” I pause. “Did he move out?” More silence, which I take as a yes. “Are you coming home?”

  “Yes, of course, I’ll be home in a couple of hours.”

  “Can you call me if you need a ride?”

  “Stop, Elle, with all these questions. I’m not a child.” She snaps. “I’ll talk to you soon. Bye, love.” She hangs up.

  I stare at the phone like its keeping secrets from me. I’m not sure what to make of my mother anymore. I feel like I’m losing her. I run up the stairs and thrust open her bedroom door. Her bedroom is a mess, clothes splayed across the bed, spilling out of dresser drawers, magazines and papers strewn all over the floor. I start searching through her room, checking under the bed for any bottles that she may be hiding.

  Tears start to blur my vision as I stumble into the bathroom, slamming drawers and pulling towels out of the linen closet where I hit the jackpot. Lined up in a neat row are bottles of vodka, whiskey, and all kinds of hard liquor. I grab each ugly bottle, slamming them on the bathroom sink, wondering if I should leave them all out so she knows that I know or pour every drop down the drain.

  “Elle! What the hell are you doing?” His voice startles me.

  I whip around and find Jace standing inside the doorway, staring from across the room as I go crazy tearing through her shit. He shakes his head dismissively, quietly surveying the chaos as he tiptoes over all the stuff on the floor. He fills the doorway of the bathroom, gazing down at me with concern, as I stand clutching one of the liquor bottles.

  “Did you come here to tell me more bullshit about my boyfriend?” I yell. “Because I don’t give a shit what you have to say about it! Look!” I point to all the bottles. “Our mom is an alcoholic!” I twist the cap off a bottle and start pouring it down the drain. He grabs my wrist, twisting me to face him. I see tears in his eyes as he hugs me close.

  “I’m sorry, Elle, for being such a hard ass with you, but you and mom are all the family I have. I worry about you.” I pull away from him and look into his face.

  “Give me space, please,” I say as I push his chest with both hands. “I get it. It’s just too much right now. If Dad hadn’t abandoned us for his new life, we wouldn’t have to deal with all the crap.”

  “Listen, he may live a few miles away, but as far as I’m concerned, he’s gone. I have nothing to say to him after all the bullshit we had to go through. Mom wouldn’t be dealing with this shit with Corey if he’d stuck around.”

  “Well, what do we do now?” I grab another bottle and start twisting the cap off. He places his hand over mine. I hesitate and look up at him.

  “Stop,” he whispers, taking the bottle from my hand. “Doing this won’t solve anything.”

  “So, what should we do? Let her keep on drink
ing?” I drop my hands to my side, feeling lost and powerless. I hear my phone ringing in the other room, I know it’s Reed, but I’m not ready to talk. I’m still trying to digest what I just discovered.

  “Go answer your phone. I’ll take care of this.” I watch Jace take all of the bottles from the sink and walk out of the room. I get that overwhelming feeling again, as I stand in the middle of the room among all of the chaos, of when I was a little girl and I used to bury my head under my pillow to silence all of the yelling and noise. Now all I get is silence, and I need to run from it. I grab my cell and check my missed text and push my problem aside when I see that it’s from Reed.

  Reed: I’m here, doll.

  Elle: That makes me happy. I’ll be right out. XO

  Reed: Ditto, doll.

  I can’t get out of the room fast enough, from all the lies and empty words that my mom has been speaking to me over the last couple weeks. I return to my room and slam the door, crumbling to the floor, feeling the urge to cry, but I fight them back. Seems as though I’m doing a lot of fighting and plenty of crying lately. I don’t know what’s happening anymore. I’m not sure if I’m strong enough to handle this.

  Doesn’t she understand what she’s doing, how it affects Jace and me? The thought of her drinking right now turns my stomach. How can she be so insensitive? I’m dealing with my own issues. I don’t need the added stress from worrying about her. It makes me angry.

  I close my eyes, take several deep breaths, imagine that what I just saw was a bad nightmare, and pull myself up off the floor. I lean against the door, staring at my face in the mirror, looking into the eyes of some girl that I feel I’ve met, but never really got acquainted with. I won’t let this destroy me. I slip into a white sundress and a pair of sandals. Checking my reflection in the mirror, I touch up my makeup and brush my hair. I don’t want Reed to know that I was crying and think that anything’s wrong.