If Only (Captured)

by Louise J

  She pauses, briefly. “It’s a weird, weird.” She shakes her head, her expression thoughtful. “Just … weird. But not a bad weird … you’re, like, my boyfriend. That’s weird, Joe.”

  I laugh, but not for long before she pulls me into a kiss. I know what she means, even if she couldn’t explain it. Shit, I can’t even explain it, but I get it.

  “I really love you, Joe Andrew Williams.”

  “I really fucking love you, Callie Ann Rogers.”

  She giggles at my returned declaration, and a thought occurs to me. Looking in her eyes, I say something absolutely unplanned, absolutely unexpected, but absolutely true. “I don’t want to be your boyfriend.” Her brows pull tight with uncertainty, so I quickly rectify my impromptu words. “It’s not enough. Marry me?” Her jaw drops and she stares at me, eyebrows raised. “I don’t want to scare you, but I have to be honest.”

  After a few more seconds, her expression softens. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

  I can’t work out what her thoughts are, but I’m happy that she knows I mean it. I won’t let her off this island until she says yes. I nod. “Yes, I am.” My stare continues to burn into hers. I don’t doubt that I’m as shocked by my proposal as she is, but I’m certain it’s what I want.

  After what felt like an eternity, she finally says, “I want to.”

  Now I’m the one frowning. “Is that a yes?”

  “Yes,” she almost laughs out. “Shit, Joe.”

  “Yeah … I know.” What a turn of events?

  “You know we’re insane, Joe. You do know that, don’t you?”

  “It’s our kind of insane, right?”

  “It totally is.”

  Thirty Nine: Callie

  The others are still sleeping, and Joe and I have eaten. Taking advantage of the warm, sunny day, we’re out by the pool. I’m still in a state of shock, but unsure whether it’s from Joe asking me to marry him or me saying yes with such ease. It’s probably both, although, I don’t know why, he’s all I ever wanted and I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life. I can’t think of anything better than spending the rest of my existence with my soul mate. His proposal may not have been candle-lit dinner for two, but, honestly, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I loved the spontaneity of it.

  We squeeze onto the same lounge chair, lying face-to-face, our legs entwined. Joe sneaks his hand into my top and starts circling my nipple with his thumb, bringing it to a hard peak. It isn’t long before he moves his mouth to my breast, and I slip my hand down into his cargo shorts. I stroke his shaft, down and up, with a twist at the head. He groans and –

  “Get a room, kids. Damn!” Gerard shouts, pulling us from our moment. I laugh, surprised and slightly embarrassed, abruptly pulling my hand from Joe’s shorts, the point at which he corrects my clothing.

  Gerard drops his ass on the chair beside us, acting as though what he just saw was a typical occurrence. I lie on my back and look across at him. “Did we have a good night, kids?” he asks, his brows slowly rising.

  Joe’s paying him no attention; he’s kissing me down my neck on the side that’s exposed to him. He’s in his own world, like we’re still the only two people here. “Did you have a good night?” I ask, switching the topic from us. I know these guys have gotten up to all kinds within the presence of each other, but not me.

  “Oh, yeah, fo’sho. I take it you didn’t see the pretty little thang that just left. She was hella hot.” There’s an air of gloating in his tone. This guy loves to chase and conquer and he enjoys nothing more than telling all.

  “I’m not even going to respond to that, Gerard.” Just as I’m about to turn my head, Su comes out onto the patio and immediately after her is Dane. Su and I smile at each other, and she says good morning to Joe as she passes us to get to the other chair. After she reclines it, she lies down and slides on her sunglasses. Shades are a key accessory for Su and me after a night of heavy drinking. In her case, that’s the only indication, because she’s never anything but cheerful. She’s the most awesome friend a girl could ask for.

  Joe stops his kisses. “Morning, Su.” She snickers at his minimal response. It isn’t even morning anymore, but everyone seems to think it is. Joe turns my head to his and presses his lips to mine. I know at this point we’re one of those annoying couples who make out like crazy, paying no attention to the people around them. Annoying, yes, but saying “No” to Joe’s lips – no way. Moving his mouth to my ear, he whispers, “I want you to sit on my face.”

  “Hah!” I guffaw and all three gazes shoot to me. With my hand, I muffle the sound as best as I can. I did not expect to hear that right now, especially given that I spent quite some time before breakfast doing exactly that. Still caught up in my suppressed chuckle, I’m vaguely aware of someone’s text alert on their cell phone.

  “Shit, those two from last night are on their way,” Dane says, loud enough to make Su, Joe and me pause at the same time. We look over at him, sitting beside Gerard.

  “No-fuckin’-way,” Gerard says, and they both chortle in their typical we-are-so-going-to-bang-those-chicks way. With no further words, they rush off. I assume to go and get ready.

  “Unbelievable,” Su says, shaking her head with humored disapproval.

  “Those damn boys,” I say, not that we’re surprised. This is characteristic of them, the man-whores.

  “What are we going to do today?” Su asks, resting her head back down. Joe’s gazing at me, and I know what he’s thinking, but I can’t just drop Su like that. Zack will be here later, but until then, I’m not disappearing. We all agree on a barbecue.

  Early afternoon Gerard and Dane arrived back with two women they met at Blaze, not the ones they brought here last night. Now we’re all by the pool and the barbecue is lit, filling the air with the smell of smoke and grilled chicken. I’m sitting with the girls, including our guests, at the table under the shade, keeping a watch over the food. Joe, Adam, Dane and Gerard are playing water volleyball. There’s low music sounding in the background and it’s turning out to be a wonderful Saturday in every way.

  Su’s talking with the visitors, and Saffron and I are having our own chat.

  “What do you think your parents will say about you getting married?” Saffron asks.

  I shrug, uncertain. “It’s so out of the blue, I might tell my sister first and get her to break the news.”

  She chuckles. “I like your thinking, good plan.” She pauses on a sigh. “I get why you didn’t say something about your feelings for Joe, but I wish you had. It would’ve saved you years of delaying the inevitable. It’s obvious you two were meant to be together. I always thought you were a good match.”

  “Really?” I look over at Joe and admire him, wet and exposed from the waist up. He finger combs back his sodden hair – snap, capture. That’s another one for my secret collection. Maybe I’ll tell him about it when I’m eighty. Definitely not before, though.

  “Yeah, I did. Adam told me in confidence that Joe wanted you, and I wished you’d been available when we all first met. You two got along so well, such great chemistry. If you’d even just hinted it to me, I’d have told you. I couldn’t otherwise, because it was a secret Adam shared with me. There were a couple times I was tempted, especially when I watched you and Joe dancing together at my wedding. I wanted to cry, you looked so right for each other and I knew how he felt. If only I knew what you felt.”

  I remember that day, I wanted to cry. Joe was best man and he was devastatingly handsome in his suit. We slow danced together and I allowed myself to hold him tight. He felt firm, strong and incredible; my heart ached. He even carried me up to my hotel room that night. I didn’t want him to go and for a crazy moment I almost asked him to stay with me. I’ve cherished the memory of that day, for a number of reasons, and it’s one of my many favorites with Joe, even if it did hurt at certain points.

  I wish I’d said something to Saffron, shared my secret with her. It all seems like such a was
te – years of Joe and I being apart, when we didn’t have to be. I hate hindsight.

  The water volleyball ends, and Joe and Adam go off to get some more alcohol. My sleep deprivation is taking hold and everyone seems entertained enough, so I sneak off upstairs.

  I wake to soft lips skimming my right cheek. Keeping my eyes closed, I smile knowing who it is. The teasing continues until I raise my lids. Joe’s kneeling on the floor beside the bed, his forearms resting atop the comforter. I glance at the clock on the nightstand. “Shit, I came up here to take ten minutes.” Shifting onto my back, I languorously stretch myself out, lengthening my muscles and limbs. As I release the stretch, I gaze at Joe. “What’ve you been up to?” I ask. A smirk tugs at his lips. That’s all the response I get. “What’ve you been up to, Joe?”

  “I just got back.”

  “Just?” He nods, and I realize he looks proud. “Joe Williams, what’ve you been up to?” Turning onto my side, facing him, I prop myself up on my elbow.

  “Well, first I called your dad and asked him if I could have your hand in marriage.” My eyes widen and my jaw drops, only silence leaves my mouth. “As you can imagine – a little like you are right now – he was surprised, because, of course, he didn’t even know we’re together.” He snickers like he’s recalling the memory. “And he’s only met me a few times. I explained everything and even though he thought it was strange and kind of quick – and after he realized it wasn’t a joke – he said that you never would’ve said yes if it wasn’t what you really wanted and we have his blessing. I think it might’ve helped that your sister was there.”

  My throat is tight and the buildup of tears is stinging my eyes, but I’m holding them back. I sit up and cross my legs in front of me. “Mom and dad know?”

  He remains kneeling, but uprights his posture with his hands braced on the comforter. He nods. “You’re under orders to call him ASAP.”

  “That’s why you’ve been gone the whole time I was asleep?”

  He shakes his head, smile widening. Reaching into the rear pocket of his jeans, he pulls out a black velvet box.

  “Joe,” I whisper, unable to look anywhere other than at what he’s holding.

  Seriously, how much can a girl take?

  He opens the small case and there sits the most extraordinary thing I’ve ever seen. My reaction is pretty much traditional, my hands fly over my mouth with a, “Oh, my God.” I watch as he eases out the ring. He takes my left hand, which is still stuck to my face, and slowly slides the band on.

  A perfect fit.

  Amazed, stunned, overwhelmed, I admire it, still speechless. It’s non-traditional and coils around my finger like a snake made out of platinum, embedded throughout with bright, white, round diamonds, the largest of which sits at the top, in the center of my finger. Twisting my hand from side to side, the stunning stones wink. “Joe, this is amazing.”

  “I adore the way you look when you see or talk about things you love,” he says, staring into my eyes. Even after all these years his slow, smooth voice gets me.

  “I don’t love anything more than you, Joe.”

  “I can’t believe you just said that.” Utterly taken aback by my words, he buries his face in my lap, his arms going around my hips. I lay my hands on his head and stroke his satin-soft hair. We remain just so.

  After some time, I have to ask, “How did you get the fit so right?”

  He gets up and sits beside me. “Just before the game, I snuck up and looked in your jewelry bag. I knew you had a ring that you sometimes wear on the same finger of your right hand, so I took it with me. There’s a jewelry store I’ve always liked not far from here. I was certain they’d have something for you. I didn’t expect they’d actually have your size there today, I thought we’d have to wait.”

  “I couldn’t have picked better myself.” Still taken aback, I can’t take my eyes off it. “Thank you for asking my dad, that means so much to me.” I hug him, squeezing him as tight as I can. I don’t let go.

  “I knew it would. And it’s only right, he is your dad.” He laughs. “It was funny, he was so surprised.”

  “I can imagine. One minute his daughter is single and the next she’s getting married. That’s just weird. What would you have done if he said no?”

  “Kept on asking until he said yes.” Though I heard the smile in his voice, I know he meant it. I smile, too. I like that. “So what do you think about getting married on Friday?”

  I pull out of our hug to look at him. “A Friday?”

  “No, Callie, on Friday.” My mouth feels paralyzed. Joe chuckles at me.

  “Are you trying to make me die of shock or something? I may only be twenty-five, but I could so easily have a heart attack, right this minute. It’d probably kill me.”

  “Say yes to Friday and I’ll shock you no more.” He’s dead serious. (I love his serious face, by the way)

  “Say yes to marrying you in six days?” I giggle, hysterically, as the words sink in. “I’m quite sure we need longer to plan a wedding. We actually need a marriage license and everything.”

  “Baby cake, I’ve done all my research. What do you honestly think I’ve been doing for the past three hours? We can go to Vegas, it’s easy and we can get a license in no time. The people who count the most can be there, and if you want, we can have a big party when we get back home. We don’t have to do it yet, not if it feels too quick, but if we know we want it, why wait? Also, I know you don’t like all that wedding fuss. I’m not so keen on it myself.”

  Staggered into silence, yet again, part of me wants to laugh, but the muscles needed won’t enable it. This is the biggest surprise of all. Am I really having this conversation, or am I asleep and dreaming? I turn my attention away from him, briefly, taking it in.

  Married to Joe.

  In Vegas.

  In six days.

  I look at him and this time I can’t stop the fat grin that forms. “I love the idea. Let’s do it, but it has to be the drive-thru, on your Harley.” Of all his bikes, that’s my favorite.

  This is definitely insane, but I’m not taking any of it lightly. I know this is right.

  Forty: Joe

  Giving Callie time with Su and saffron, and a chance to talk to her parents, I sit with the guys at the dining table. It goes without saying that everyone is surprised. I’m shocked myself. I never intended on things moving so fast, but, I don’t really feel like settling for anything less.

  “Hold up!” Gerard says, smiling with the suggestion of scheming in his eyes. With the look on his face, I probably won’t like where this is going. “You know what this means, right? I get to organize your bachelor party.” Nope, I don’t like it – I know this motherfucker too damn well.

  Dane and Adam cackle. It’s probably at my expression, which is no doubt one of dread. “I don’t even wanna know, just remember how easy it would be for me to kick your ass,” I say, meeting his untrustworthy stare.

  He places his hand on my shoulder. “Brother, you’ll be fine, just leave it to me.” I shake my head. If necessary, I will kick his ass. “You’re having two. One at home and one in Vegas, baby.”

  Fuck him. Subject change. “Where are those chicks you had here?”

  “Gone to get ready,” Dane answers. “Tonight’s all about celebration, we’re headed back to Blaze. Johnny’s hooking us up with free celebratory champagne. There’s a hella alcohol on the agenda tonight.”

  “Damn, you’re just as bad as he is,” I tell him, pointing at Gerard.

  “We’re losing you,” Gerard says. “It’s devastating, there’s got to be a pay-off somewhere. I’m gonna miss you once that ball and chain is on.” I probably shouldn’t tell him that I like the sound of that.

  Shit, I feel totally lame. I’m running on two nights of very little sleep. All I want to do is get lost in my woman and then sleep. I probably shouldn’t tell these guys that, either.

  ****

  When we got back home on Sunday night, Callie decided
she had enough to do that we wouldn’t see each other until Wednesday. With the time we had before leaving for Vegas, we agreed that she’ll move in with me after we return.

  Gerard’s picked tonight for the first bachelor party. I don’t know anyone who does this thing on a Tuesday, but we are. In two days, we’re doing it all again in Vegas. Neither is going to be what I want, I know exactly what kind of shit he’ll come up with. Callie thought it was funny and encouraged it, and so did Adam and Dane. Before we’d even left Hillsborough I started plotting my way out, at least, from tonight.

  I know, for his benefit, the occasion will include scantily clad ladies and lots of them. Naked women and fuckloads of alcohol would once have been my kind of action, too, but there’s only one female I want to see unclothed and I can’t get enough of her. I’m not willing to wait until tomorrow to see her, either.

  Gerard’s plans involve the penthouse his father owns, so based around that, I’ve schemed against him. He’s too predictable for me to fail. I’m going ready to play along, even dressed for the occasion in a gray dress shirt and black dress slacks.

  When I arrive, Gerard is at the bar doing his best, but a lousy impersonation of Tom Cruise in Cocktail. Almost every guy I know is here and the atmosphere is set. I probably would’ve loved this if it was for someone else.

  “Whatcha drinking, buddy?” Gerard asks, flipping over a bottle of vodka in his right hand.

  I chuckle at the seriousness he’s putting into it. “Jack and coke.” I’ll keep it light by diluting the whisky. He’s so caught up in his juggling exhibition he didn’t even catch on to that. That’s the first part of my plan in place; stay sober. I glance at the glass next to me on the bar. “What in the hell is in this purple stuff?” I’m sure he’s forgotten, he seems more interested in the number of different liquors he can get into the shaker he’s holding, rather than what they actually are.

  “Vodka, tequila, white rum, a touch of cognac, a dash of vanilla essence I found in the kitchen, and some purple food coloring. The final ingredient is lemonade. No harm in a little experimentation, right? That right there is the first of its kind. Go ahead, give it a shot.”