by Karen Woods
Harpur began to chuckle. “It’s about time she met Mr Right isn’t it, she's never had any luck with the men has she?”
Sheila let out a laboured breath. “I suppose it runs in the family that bad luck, we’re cursed. Look at me, I only attract nutters, not one of them have been normal.”
Harpur picked her coffee up and blew at it, hoping to cool it down. “You and me both then. I’ve had a share of them too.”
“Yeah, but look at what you have now. Some women would cut their right arm off to have a husband like Neil. You could have done a lot worse you know.”
Harpur shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes. What did her mother really know about the life she was living? All she could see was that Neil went to work and he wasn’t out every night on the piss like her men had been in the past. Marriage wasn’t just about that was it? A relationship needed to be kept alive, couples should never stop trying. Romance should never die when two people love each other, they should bend over backwards to make each other happy; it was about teamwork, helping, caring, two becoming one. Was this topic even worth wasting breath on? Sheila would never have a bad word said about her son-in-law, she was up his arse, a brown-noser.
The back door swung open and in walked Diane. She smiled over at them both and swept her hair back from her face. “It’s official, I’m head over heels in love.” Sheila screwed up her face and didn’t take her eyes off the television. Maybe she was jealous. It was just something in her eyes that seemed a little bit different. “I swear to you both, this guy is the love of my life, we just clicked. Sheila, he’s got a brother if you fancy a double date? Come on, let’s see if we can get rid of some of them cobwebs in your knickers girl.”
Sheila snapped and from out of the blue she started screaming her head off. Whoa, where was this coming from? “Are you all forgetting I’ve just buried my son? Do you think for one second that I would want a man all over me while I’m grieving? Have a bit of bleeding respect will you?”
Harpur shot a look over at her auntie. Sheila was bang out of order and she knew sooner or later Diane would give her a mouthful. She would never be spoken to like this. “Sheila, if you take your head out of your arse for a few seconds you would see we all know what you’re going through. What, do you expect nobody else to ever be happy again because Brady decided to take his own life? That was his choice love, not ours. I’m sorry he’s gone but you can’t expect us all to shut up shop and sit crying for the rest of our lives. Perhaps if you would have stood up to Brady a bit more he wouldn’t have walked all over you. Don’t think I don’t know what went on in this house because I do. People talk you know and I’ve been told all about the way he treated you too. He threatened to hit you, go on admit it.” Diane knew a lot more than she was letting on, she locked eyes with her sister. Harpur cringed, she would have never gone that deep into it. But it was all true. Every word Diane said was bang on.
Sheila gritted her teeth and she was ready for blowing. How dare she speak about her boy like that? She would scratch her eyes out if she carried on darkening his name. Diane wasn’t scared, she sat down and waited to hear what she had to say. If Sheila wanted a fight then she was ready for her, she was sick to death of hearing it day in, day out about how she was the only one who cared for her son. Well, not today, no more, she was getting told. Sheila was on the war path. “We all have our troubles behind closed doors as you know. And whoever has been gossiping about me and our Brady then go back to them and tell them to keep their bleeding nose out of my business before I start telling all I know about people around here. Oh yes, there would be a few divorces if I let the cat out of the bag I can tell you. Those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.” Sheila’s back was up alright but she never took it any further, she plonked back down in her chair and tightly folded her arms across her chest.
Diane looked over at Harpur and rolled her eyes. She knew Sheila wouldn’t give her any more grief. She’d tear her apart if she did. Diane carried on talking to Harpur and filled her in on the new man she’d found. Every now and then she looked over at her sister and smiled because she knew she was listening in. Stubborn cow she was. Harpur looked at the wall clock and stood to her feet. “Diane, are you staying for a while because I’ve got to go home. Neil’s cooking tea tonight and I don’t want to be late.”
Sheila piped into the conversation. “She doesn’t have to sit with me I’m not a bloody baby, I can look after myself. I like my own company as you both know.”
Diane growled over at her. “Oh and don’t we know it! Nobody said you need looking after did they, so wind your bleeding neck in. I’m staying for a bit anyway. Well, that’s if you shut that moaning arse up for a second.”
Harpur smirked and walked to her mother’s side to kiss her cheek. Sheila kept her eyes on the TV and never flinched, her cheek was cold, just like her heart really. Before she left she asked Diane, “keep me updated on your love life too. I do hope he’s the one. God knows you’ve waited long enough for him.”
Diane nodded. “I know love, go on, you get going before your tea gets cold. I’ll be here tomorrow so call and see me if you get a chance.”
“I will, right, I’m getting off. Come here and give me a kiss.” The two women hugged and Harpur kissed her auntie on the cheek before she left.
Harpur walked down the garden path and looked behind her to make sure nobody could see her. Quickly, she gripped the black bags from the corner of the garden. She headed out of the back gate and slung them in the boot of her car quickly. What on earth was in there? They were heavy. As soon as she got the chance she would go through all her brother’s stuff and see if there was anything of interest inside them. If he was hiding anything she would find it for sure. Harpur locked the boot of the car and walked to the driver’s side of the car. Lifting her eyes, she could see her brother’s bedroom window staring back at her. Was there someone there hidden behind the curtain? She wasn’t sure. Eyes squeezing tightly together, she examined every inch of the window. No, she must have been imagining it. There wasn’t a soul there. It was probably wishful thinking, hoping Brady would be waving at her from the window like he always used to.
Harpur walked into the kitchen to met by delicious smells of garlic, herbs and onions. Neil was stood at the stove and he smiled at her as she began to take her coat off. “Come on princess. You sit down there and let me wait on you. I’m your loyal servant tonight, my dear.”
Harpur shot her eyes around the kitchen. It was a bloody mess, he must have used every single plate and pan in the place. They were all stacked high in the sink. Looking further round she could see the stains dribbling down the front of the cupboards; there was sauces and oil all over the place. He was such a messy bleeder. This was going to take her hours to clean up. Neil wiped the edge of the plate before he gave it her. “Oh, you want romance I’ll give you romance.” He pecked her on the side of her cheek. “There you go my darling, get stuck into that.” He turned around and walked back to the kitchen side. He stood flicking his lighter and lit the vanilla scented candle near him. Harpur was trying to get a glimpse of what he was doing. As soon as she saw him holding her candle from the bedroom she could have dropped down dead. She’d had this candle forever and never once had she lit it. This was a present from Brady, a gift on her birthday. The rage was pumping inside her and she couldn’t hold it in.
“Neil, blow the candle out quick, for fuck’s sake. You’re a right daft bastard. That candle was from my brother. It’s just for show, it’s not to light.”
Neil looked at her as if she was mental. “What, we have candles in the house that we don’t light now. Are you for real or what?”
Harpur stood to her feet and moved quickly towards the yellow flame. Blowing hard, she made sure the candle was no longer burning. She gripped it in her hands and you could see by her expression that this meant so much more to her than he thought. Neil just looked at her and said nothing, he was speechless. This romantic night seemed to be o
ver before it had even started. He ragged his fingers through his hair and let out a laboured breath. She’d pissed him right off. “I just can’t do right for doing wrong me, can I?” He stomped about the kitchen, slamming doors, launching plates into the sink. He was on one, raging. Harpur stared over at him. Did he really want an answer to that question or what? The man was a clown, a brain-dead idiot who never thought anything through. She sat back down and stared at her food. And, to add insult to injury her husband had put mushrooms on her plate, he knew she hated them. What on earth was he playing at? Had he never taken one bit of notice regarding her likes and dislikes throughout their marriage? Her cheeks were on fire, she wanted to sling the meal up the wall, smash the plate over his big daft head. Her appetite was gone, there was no way she could pretend everything was alright here. It was a disaster zone.
A text alert from her phone sounded. Neil was still stood at the sink and he’d seen his arse. He was mumbling under his breath as Joanne walked into the kitchen. She’d heard the commotion from the other room and had come in to see what was going on. She loved a bit of drama, she loved that something exciting was happening in her life. Sitting down at the table, she clocked the food on the plate and looked over at Harpur. “Oh, that looks lovely. Have you made this Neil?” She didn’t have to wait long for an answer.
“Yes, I did. But you get no thanks in this house. Ungrateful she is. All because I lit a daft bleeding candle. Apparently, we only have candles for show. Who in their right mind doesn’t light fucking candles?” Joanne smirked and covered her mouth with her hand slightly. Neil came to the table and pushed Harpur’s plate over to her. “You can have it if you want Joanne. No point in it going to waste is there?”
“Yes, you eat it because I won’t be touching it. How sad is it when your own husband doesn’t know you don't like mushrooms? So much for romance. I think we are way past that don’t you Neil? It’s more like divorce proceedings we’re heading to.”
Neil spun his head back around and his eyes were bulging, she’d hit a nerve alright. His true colours were coming out now. “Like I give a flying fuck anymore. If you want a divorce then let’s crack on. What’s the point anymore. I’m sick of trying with you. Go and try to find someone who will love you like I do. Good luck with it, you’ll need it. Hard work you are, draining.”
Joanne picked a fork up and started to eat the meal slowly. This girl had no shame, the greedy cow. There was a deadly silence. Come on Harpur, she thought, it’s not like you to let him speak to you like that, retaliate, tell him he’s an arsehole, say something, put him in his place. She swallowed hard and stood to her feet. Here it was, she was ready to let rip. Placing a single hand on her hips, she moistened her lips. Their eyes locked and he knew she was at breaking point. “You think you’re so special don’t you. Everyone thinks you're perfect and have no faults. Well, they want to try living with you. You’re lazy, selfish, and a tight-arsed penny-pinching bastard. Do you know what, I might just find someone who loves me too because it's obvious all you care about is the bleeding football and the gym. So it works both ways. You go and find somebody who looks after you like I do because as far as I’m concerned, this marriage is dead and has been for a long time. Shove this marriage up your arsehole.”
Joanne’s eyes were wide open, her jaw dropped. Well, fuck a duck, she never expected this. She always thought these two were strong together. Just wait until Sam rang her, she would fill him in on the family traumas. Neil ragged his hands through his hair and his nostrils flared. He was sorry now, wanted to make amends. He walked over to her and placed his two arms around her neck, looking her straight in the eye. She was wriggling about, trying to move him from her. “I’m sorry love. I just worked so hard all day trying to get everything right for you. I’m sorry about the candle too, I should have asked before I lit it.” This man was so manipulating, he had a knack of always making her out to be the bad one. No matter what went on, he always turned the situation around so he looked innocent. He was a twat, end of. Joanne sat watching them, she’d nearly eaten everything that was on her plate, the greedy bitch shovelled it in.
“Take your hands off me Neil. I just need time on my own. I’m sick to death of us and how we are together. We’re not in love anymore. Come on, admit it, we just make each other miserable.”
Neil was in a panic, this wasn't what he wanted to hear. “Harpur, it’s just a silly argument. Come on now, stop overreacting. Why do you just blow everything up so much? Just let it go and let’s make friends.” She gripped his hands and prised his fingers open one by one. She was serious now and ready to snap. He’d pushed her buttons and there was no way she was backing down.
“I said, I want to be left alone, fuck off away from me. Go on, piss off and go and watch some football. Just leave me alone before I say something I might regret.”
Oh, this was real alright, how could he ever come back from this? Okay he’d let his marriage slip for a while and by his own admission, he could have done more to keep his wife happy, but he just got comfortable and took her for granted. He was up shit street for sure. Harpur stormed out of the kitchen. Neil punched the door behind him and plonked down at the table. Joanne reached over and patted his shoulder softly. “She’ll calm down, just give her time. You sit here and I’ll put your food on a plate. You’ve worked hard preparing this and there is no point in it going to waste is there?”
Neil smiled over at her. She was so caring and always knew what to say to cheer him up. “Thanks love. You see now what I have to put up with. Fucking crazy she is, a nutter.”
Harpur slammed the bedroom door. She flung her shoes off and slammed her body onto the bed. Punching her clenched fist into the pillow, she was having a meltdown. Why was her life so hard at the moment, why was everything falling apart around her? Looking at her phone, she read another message from Dessie.
“Can we Skype, need a chat with you. I’m here when you’re free”
Harpur dried her eyes and read the text over and over again. What did he need to talk with her about, she’d already spoken to him earlier in the day? Was he alright, had something happened? She replied to his message rapidly.
“Hi Dessie, yes course we can. Are you alright? Give me about ten minutes though.”
The message was sent and she sat staring out of the window. Her head was in bits, was her marriage really over or was this just a bad patch they were going through? Anyway, what was the point in worrying about it, what would be would be, wouldn't it? Checking her make-up in the mirror, she quickly touched it up and straightened her hair. Dessie would cheer her up for sure, nothing else seemed to matter anymore but him. He was just the remedy that she needed. Harpur quickly put her shoes back on and gathered her belongings. Heading down the stairs, Neil was waiting at the bottom for her. Her eyes were wide open, she needed to leave now, go and see Dessie. What on earth was she going to tell him, she needed to think fast, sort it out. “Neil, I’m just nipping to Bridget’s, she’s got man troubles and needs a chat. Please, don’t start on me. My head’s banging and I just need to calm down.”
Her husband was desperate. “Can we talk when you come back later? I need to sort this out. You said we should get a divorce, what’s all that about? Tell me you were just angry and said it in the heat of the moment, go on tell me. Don’t make me suffer like this.”
Harpur held her breath, she needed to leave and there was no way he would let her go until she told him what he wanted to hear. He would peck her head for hours if she didn’t tell him what he wanted to hear. “Neil, just let me go. You make me angry sometimes and I probably overreact.”
Neil let out a relieved sigh. That was enough to put his mind at ease. If his marriage was over he would have fallen apart, he would be crippled inside. Harpur and Maddie were his life. At that moment Neil seemed to understand all the things she’d said to him. He rested his hand on her waist. “I’m sorry love. I’ll make thing better I promise you. From now on I’ll make sure I put you first.”
He leaned in for a kiss and she cringed as his lips touched hers. She just wanted to go now, put her troubles behind her. Escape her life.
Harpur positioned her mobile phone on the dashboard. She’d parked up in a quiet lay-by and she was nearly ready to make the call. Just a few last tweaks to her lip gloss and she was ready to go. The sound of the phone ringing filled the car and her heart beat rapidly. What on earth did Dessie want to talk to her about? What if he said he didn't want to talk to her anymore, how would she take it? Perhaps that might have been a good thing anyway. Maybe then she would have tried to patch her marriage up and smooth over the cracks.
The call connected and it took a few seconds before she could see his image on the phone. She smiled as he appeared. She took in every inch of him, his surroundings, his hair, his teeth, his clothing. “Hi, there, how are you?”
Dessie raised a smile back but it was obvious something was bothering him. She remained quiet and gave him the chance to talk. “I’ve got a few decisions to make that’s all. But I’m over in England next week and I was thinking if you’re not busy we can meet up. Maybe a weekend away together?”
Harpur was shocked, speechless. Her and Dessie spending a full weekend together? She didn’t mind meeting up for a few drinks but this guy was asking for so much more. Would that mean sleeping together, spending the night in the same bed, sex? No, there was no way she was up for this, it was too much, too soon. She laughed it off. “Who, me, you and our partners?”
Dessie chuckled loudly. “Derr, me and you, nobody else. I just think it would be nice for us to spend some quality time together that’s all. We get on right?”
“Yes, but we’re mates Dessie. You can’t just say let’s go away together. Where is your head at, we’re both married are you forgetting that?”
Dessie stretched his arms above his head and smirked at her. “I see you’re still the same old Harpur. Where has your sense of adventure gone?” This guy was using every trick in the book now and she was unsure of her answer.