Straight from the Heart

by Layce Gardner

  “Anyone else want to start with coffee and pie?” Molly said. “And no dessert-shaming from the doctor,” she added, pointing her pen at Susan.

  “No objections here. I’ll have the cherry pie and make it a la mode,” Susan said. “That should take care of my fruit and dairy for the day.”

  Steph looked around the room. She didn’t see any of her firefighting buddies. “I’ll have apple pie. A big slice. You know what they say: an apple a day keeps the doctor away.” She looked at Susan. “No offence.”

  “None taken,” Susan said. She handed her menu to Molly.

  “What about your diet?” Rosa quietly asked Steph.

  “I’m cheating,” Steph whispered. “And I’m depending on your discretion.”

  “Diet?” Susan said. “You don’t need to lose any weight. Your BMI is outstanding.”

  “Sal is twenty pounds overweight,” Steph said. “So we all have to diet with him.”

  “Ah, it’s a solidarity thing,” Susan said.

  “Yes,” Steph said. “His wife is pregnant and he says that he’s sympathy eating. Is that a real thing?” The frost that had been straining their friendship seemed to be thawing.

  “I don’t think it’s been scientifically proven.”

  Molly took the rest of their order. “I’ll be back in a flash.”

  “So, you’ve heard the news?” Millie asked, pointing at Amy’s hand as she unwrapped her silverware from the paper napkin.

  “I did. I was pissed at Parker for not telling me, then I remembered who I was pissed at. Parker does things in her own way,” Steph said. “Congratulations, Amy.”

  “Thanks. I’m kind of scared, though,” Amy said.

  “Why? You two make a great couple,” Susan said.

  “Not about that. It’s the whole wedding thing. I never thought I’d get married,” Amy said.

  “We can thank Obama for that,” Rosa said.

  “For me being scared?” Amy said.

  Rosa swatted her arm. “Not that.”

  Amy smiled.

  “You’re sure in a good mood,” Susan said to Rosa. “You must be feeling better.”

  “I am. My lovely wife brought me breakfast in bed and now I’m having pie for lunch. Can it get any better?” Rosa said.

  There was an uneasy silence because they were all thinking yes, it could be better—if you weren’t wheelchair bound.

  Molly returned with the pie plates stacked up and down her arms and a tray of coffee cups. She set down the tray in the middle of the table and then dealt out the pie plates like a Las Vegas blackjack dealer.

  Steph didn’t waste any time getting the pie from the plate to her mouth. “My god, this pie is good,” she said with her mouth full.

  “It’s because you’ve haven’t had any sugar recently,” Rosa said. “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

  Millie said, “I always thought people were saying ‘absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.’”

  They all laughed.

  “All I know is that this pie is pure heaven,” Steph said with an exaggerated moan.

  Rosa smiled to herself as she took a bite of her chocolate cream pie. She thought about tonight and the dessert she had in store for Steph.

  ***

  While Steph ran to the store to get groceries, Rosa prepared for their romantic evening. She’d been thinking about how mean she’d been toward Steph. She chastised herself for taking her anger and frustration out on the one person who loved her most in world. Why do we always take it out on our loved ones? Because around our loved ones we are allowed to be our truer selves—the one we hide from the world because we don’t want people to see our snotty, rude, mean selves, Rosa thought.

  She wheeled herself into the laundry room. She remembered she had stored candles there after their housewarming party years ago. Steph feared and hated candles, stating that burning them was just asking for a house fire. The cupboard containing the candles was above the washer. Rosa couldn’t reach the cupboard unless she stood up. Steph would know she’d done it and not be happy, but hopefully, a few kisses would make her forget it.

  She maneuvered her wheelchair as close to the cupboard as possible, set the brakes, and firmly grabbed the arm rests. Taking a deep breath, she slowly lifted herself out of the chair, leaned against the washer for support, and reached up to the top shelf.

  Figures. Steph would put the candles on the highest shelf.

  She retrieved two scented candles. She eased back into the chair, breathing heavily. Anne was right on the money about the deep breathing. Shallow breathing made her dizzy when exerting herself.

  She backed out of the laundry room. She took the candles to the bedroom and hid them in the nightstand on her side of the bed. Next thing was locating her slinky lingerie. Where had that gotten off to? Boy, that sure said a thing or two about her love life. How long had it been since they’d had a night of romance even before the accident? She couldn’t remember. That needed to be remedied.

  Rosa began searching in her underwear drawer. That was another task that required her lifting herself out of the chair. At this rate, she’d be too physically exhausted to have sex. Sure enough, her negligee was stuffed way in the back of the drawer. When she sat down and shut the drawer, it knocked one of Steph’s prized snow globes off the top of the dresser. It was a souvenir from their first vacation to Niagara Falls.

  I hope that’s not an omen.

  She bent as far as she could while seated in the chair. Her fingertips fell about ten inches too short. She stretched even further, urging her fingers forward. Still, nine inches short. There was no way she could get the snow globe. Not while still in the chair.

  Could she slip out of the chair? Get the snow globe and then pull herself back into the chair? She didn’t think so.

  Was there a long stick or something she could use to pick up the snow globe? She needed one of those long, claw poles that were advertised on TV for senior citizens.

  Face it. There’s no way I’ll be able to pick that up.

  She felt like crying. What use was she? She couldn’t pick up something from the floor, she couldn’t take a shower on her own, she couldn’t work anymore, she could barely wipe her own butt.

  Great. Steph’s been gone for all of ten minutes and I decide to throw myself a pity party.

  Staring down at the snow globe, Rosa’s brain scrambled to figure out a way to explain it. She didn’t want to lie to Steph. When they’d first gotten together, Rosa told Steph about her previous girlfriend who lied sometimes just for the sake of lying. It didn’t even have to be a lie about anything important. She just liked to lie and see if she could get away with it. When Rosa called her on it, her ex would deny it—thereby compounding the lie. And this was long before “alternate facts” became the norm.

  Rosa heard the front door open.

  Crap. What am I going to do?

  She had to think fast. She didn’t want to ruin the surprise. She turned her chair abruptly and accidentally knocked another snow globe off the top of the dresser. This one was from their trip to Colorado.

  My god! I’m such a klutz!

  She wheeled over to her side of the bed and shoved the negligee under her pillow.

  “Babe?” Steph called from the kitchen.

  “I’m in here,” Rosa said, surveying the mess she’d made. She swore she wouldn’t cry, but it was so incredibly frustrating trying to maneuver the damn chair in their small house. She angrily wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. She couldn’t even pull off a romantic evening. She slapped the arm rest in frustration.

  Steph came in the bedroom. She looked down at the fallen snow globes. “What happened?”

  Rosa avoided Steph’s gaze. “I bumped into the dresser with my chair.”

  Steph picked up the two snow globes and sat on the bed near Rosa. “It’s all right. No big deal.”

  Rosa almost snapped at her, but stopped herself. It wasn’t Steph’s fault that her clumsiness had knock
ed the snow globes off the dresser.

  “Remember when we went to Niagara Falls?” Steph said. “I knew you loved me when you agreed to go. You thought it was such a cliché—all that silly romance stuff. But you went anyway.”

  Rosa couldn’t help but smile. Only Steph could turn her frustration into a fond memory. “It wasn’t silly. It was beautiful.” She chuckled. “Except for the getting soaked part.”

  Steph laughed. She held up the snow globe and they both gazed into it like it was a crystal ball replaying the memory of their vacation.

  They had stood at the railing watching the magnificent falls. The forceful spray of water had soaked them head to toe, and it was freezing, but still they didn’t move. The rushing water was so loud it was like they were standing beside a locomotive, and they couldn’t hear each other speak. Still, they didn’t move. There was something so mesmerizing, so awe-inspiring, about being in the presence of such a powerful force of nature.

  Freezing, soaked to the bone, and deaf, Steph leaned down and kissed Rosa. Suddenly, Rosa was warm. She couldn’t imagine a more perfect place to be than in Steph’s embrace. And that was the moment that Rosa realized Steph was The One. Steph was her destiny. Steph was the person she wanted to spend her life with.

  Steph stood up and placed the snow globes back on the dresser. “You ready for dinner? I got deli meats and cheese to go with the loaf of bread we got at Molly’s.”

  “Sounds great. I’m famished,” Rosa said.

  “I’ll make you a Dagwood sandwich,” Steph said. She paused in the doorway and turned back to Rosa. “You know, we’re going to have more snow globes to add to our collection someday. You’ll see.”

  Rosa saw the hope shining in Steph’s eyes and knew that she would do everything possible to make that hope become a reality.

  “I know,” Rosa said.

  ***

  Steph had filled the bathtub with hot water and added a fizzy bath ball. “I admit, I stopped by Bath and Bubbles, that new shop on Main and picked up some fancy bath stuff. I got you some new lotion, too.”

  “You’re too good to me,” Rosa said. She eased into the tub with Steph’s help. “I wish I could see the scar on my back. Is it hideous?” She had thought about asking Steph for a mirror to examine the scar, but a part of her didn’t want to see it.

  Steph sat on the side of the tub, quartered toward Rosa. “Scars are a history of our lives. Nothing to be ashamed of.”

  “Says the scarless one.”

  “Phish. What about my big toe? It’s missing half its nail and it doesn’t gross you out.”

  “This is different.”

  “My toenail begs to differ.”

  “Phish yourself,” Rosa said. She flicked water in Steph’s direction.

  Steph dipped the loofah in the warm water then lathered it with a bar of homemade tea tree oil soap. “I noticed the candles,” she said.

  Rosa waited for her to be peeved and give her a lecture, but she didn’t. “Mmmhmmm.”

  “Does that mean…?”

  “Maybe,” Rosa said with a small smile. “Why don’t you climb in here with me?”

  “I don’t know. Will I fit?”

  “In case you’ve forgotten, we used to both get in this tub quite often.”

  Steph smiled. “I was smaller then. And more limber.”

  Rosa tugged at Steph’s pant leg. “Get those clothes off and get in here.”

  “You’re sure?”

  “Very sure.”

  Steph stepped out of her clothes and into the tub. Rosa at one end, Steph at the other. It was a tight fit, but they didn’t mind.

  “Mmmm, this is nice,” Steph said.

  “If you turn around I can wash your back,” Rosa offered.

  Steph did as she was told. Rosa took the loofah and dunked it in the soft, silky water. She scrubbed Steph’s back. Rosa leaned in and kissed the back of Steph’s neck. Steph shivered deliciously.

  Rosa slipped a soapy hand under Steph’s arm and lathered her breast. “Feel good?”

  Steph leaned into her with a sigh. “Wonderful.”

  Rosa wrapped both arms around Steph. She stroked Steph’s nipples. They hardened under the attention. Rosa gently pinched them. “Oh, babe,” Steph said. She groaned with pleasure.

  “You’ve lost some weight,” Rosa said, running her hands down Steph’s tummy.

  “It’s that damn low carb/no sugar diet,” Steph said. “I needed to lose a few pounds anyway. There were these suspicious love handles showing up.”

  “No, you didn’t. You’ve always had an amazing body. Have I told you that lately?” Rosa asked.

  “Yeah, you told me just the other day,” Steph said.

  “Liar,” Rosa breathed.

  “Well, you didn’t exactly say it out loud, but I could tell you were thinking it. I caught you checking out my ass.”

  “I was not.”

  “Now who’s lying?”

  “Okay, maybe just a little,” Rosa said. Her hands slipped down lower, caressing the inside of Steph’s firm thighs.

  “Oh my,” Steph said. “Don’t start something you can’t finish.”

  “I have plans on finishing it.” Rosa whispered in Steph’s ear, “Take me to bed.”

  Rosa delighted in the ripple of pleasure her warm breath caused. Steph rose out of the bath, bubbles sliding down her body. Rosa thought she looked like Aphrodite rising from the froth of the sea. She hadn’t been this excited to make love since their first night together.

  Could it really be eleven years since the first time they made love? They had both been so nervous. They hadn’t done it until their fourth date. Almost unheard of in lesbian culture. They had gone to a special midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Steph had dressed as Frank-N-Furter and Rosa had been Magenta. They threw toast, sang along, flicked Bics, shouted at the actors on the screen, and had a great time.

  Steph had been raised on Rocky Horror. Her mom had been a Transylvanian from way back. Steph had grown up listening to the album and watching the movie on DVD with her mother every Halloween. There were photos of Steph in the family album, five years old, wearing only her white cotton panties, fish net stockings with garters, singing Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me.

  Rosa had been a Rocky Horror virgin. She had been amazed by the crowd of people in the movie theatre. Boys dressed as girls, girls as boys, and everything in between. There was a permissive air of exploring one’s sexuality that had excited Rosa. She was used to hiding in the dark with her budding lesbianism. Furtive hands, shadowed movements, quiet moans, and muted pleasure were the only love she had known.

  After the movie, Steph took Rosa back to the apartment she shared with a nurse who worked the night shift. Rosa sat on the edge of the bed while Steph had put on a Nina Simone CD. While Nina crooned “I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl,” Steph knelt on the floor in front of Rosa. She undid Rosa’s garters and took her sweet time unrolling her fish nets. Steph kissed the top of her knees, then sprinkled the kisses up Rosa’s legs. Without even knowing what she was doing, Rosa wrapped her hand around the back of Steph’s neck, urging her closer, begging her for more…

  Now they had come full circle.

  Rosa was sitting on the edge of the bed and, once again, Steph was kneeling between her legs. Steph kissed the top of Rosa’s legs.

  Rosa put her fingertips under Steph’s chin and forced her to look up. “I have to tell you something,” Rosa said.

  Fear clouded Steph’s eyes. “Did I do something wrong?”

  “No, nothing wrong. In fact, I think you’re going to like this,” Rosa answered.

  “What?”

  “Reach under the bed.”

  Steph looked at her quizzically.

  “Go ahead,” Rosa urged. “Under the bed. Pull it out.”

  Steph looked under the bed and pulled out the wedge-shaped pillow. It was black and velvety, smooth to the touch. She turned it over in her hands, studying it from every angle. “Pillow?”
she asked.

  Rosa nodded. “It’s a wedge pillow. I’m supposed to lay on it. To support my back, you know, so it doesn’t hurt or anything.”

  “Okay…”

  “And it also raises my, you know, pelvis. So that…” she blushed. “It’s called The Liberator.”

  “Oh…” Steph grinned. “I like the sound of that.”

  Steph placed the pillow under Rosa’s back and buttocks. As promised, the pillow raised her hips from the bed, giving Steph easier access to pleasure Rosa.

  Steph returned to kissing Rosa’s thighs. Her warm breath and soft lips stirred a part of Rosa that hadn’t felt alive in a long time.

  “God, that feels so good,” Rosa murmured.

  Steph spread Rosa’s thighs even more. She draped each of Rosa’s legs over her shoulders, kissing and nibbling her way up. She parted Rosa’s folds with her fingers allowing her tongue to find Rosa’s sweet spot. She stroked with her tongue, slow, long, luxurious licks.

  Rosa inhaled sharply.

  Steph’s head bobbed up. “Are you okay?”

  Rosa put her hand on the top of Steph’s head and pushed her face back down, saying, “Don’t stop. Don’t you dare stop.”

  And Steph didn’t stop. Her tongue teased, toyed, taunted, and brought Rosa to a climax that she didn’t even know she was capable of. Multiple aftershocks rocked her body for minutes afterward.

  Steph crawled up on the bed beside Rosa, holding her in her arms until her breathing returned to normal.

  “Your turn,” Rosa said. She scooted off the pillow and pushed it toward Steph.

  “You want me on this?”

  “It’s not just for injuries, you know.”

  “You’re sure?” Steph asked. “You can…?”

  “Do you remember the first time we made love?”

  Steph chuckled. “Rocky Horror. You were the hottest, sexiest Magenta I’d ever seen.”

  “Remember how we made love all night long?”

  “The best night of my life.”

  “Well, this is now going to be the best night of your life,” Rosa teased.

  “That’s a tall order to fill…” Steph muttered.

  But Rosa had been right. It was the Best. Night. Ever.