by Amy Gamet
24
Jessa changed into the large T-shirt he left for her, grateful for the clean clothes after her shower, and made her way back to the guest room. The bed was big and tall and fluffy, covered in a white comforter and lots of pillows. She sighed, relieved she would finally get to spend the night by herself, and climbed under the covers.
Jax knocked once and opened the door. "All set for bed?"
"For the love of God, just lock me in here and leave me alone."
He clucked his tongue. "Sorry, sweetheart, there's no lock on the door. But I brought something for you.”
She eyed him warily. “What is that?"
He moved to the end of the bed and sat down, pulling the blankets out to expose her feet, and her stomach clenched.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
His voice was husky. "Just making sure you're here in the morning."
He picked up her foot and wrapped something soft around her ankle. She pushed down the puffy blanket so she could see what he had placed there—a black velvet cuff with red rope running from it.
A sex toy.
She gasped. “You can’t be serious…”
“Oh, I’m serious all right. You tried to take my child out of my life. I’ll do whatever I have to do to keep you here.” He raised one eyebrow. “I think you'll find they're pretty comfortable."
“Just a little something you happened to have lying around?”
He shrugged. “They’re made for holding someone against a bed. They seemed appropriate.”
He reached for her other foot and she snatched it away. “Would you rather sleep in my bed tonight?” he asked. His eyes were dark, and they held a silent threat that clearly told her the sex toy was the least dangerous option.
She pursed her lips. “How am I supposed to move?”
“I’ll leave enough play in the lines. As long as you can’t reach the other straps to unfasten them, that’s all I care about.”
She glared at him, then slowly put her leg back within his reach. He touched her and her leg jerked as he placed the band around her ankle and secured it tightly.
She couldn’t help but wonder what woman he’d tied to his bed before her. Was that how he liked it, with one partner immobile?
Or maybe the tie-downs are for him.
An image of Jax naked and spread eagle on the bed emerged unbidden in her mind. His glorious muscles. His cock erect and full.
Lord have mercy.
But who was the woman who would straddle him?
She watched as he tucked a length of red rope under the mattress, then moved to the side of the bed and pulled it back out. She licked her lips.
“Give me your hand,” he said.
She was beginning to feel way too vulnerable, and she was shaking. “This is ridiculous.”
“All right, then.” He pulled back the covers, exposing her body and bare legs. “I’ll sleep in here with you.”
“Whoa, wait, stop!” She grabbed the blankets and pulled them back up with a huff. “Fine. Tie me up, but you’re not sleeping here.” She glared at him as his too-warm fingers wrapped around her wrist and pulled it toward him, then fastened the velvet strap securely.
He walked to the opposite side of the bed, trailing the red rope up the underside of the mattress as he went. He sat down on the edge of the bed and held out his hand expectantly.
Her heart was racing. As soon as she gave him her hand, he would have all four of her limbs secured.
"Give me your hand, Jessa."
She took a deep breath in and out, imploring him with her eyes not to make her do this.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” he said, but there was a change in him, a dangerous fierceness to his voice that made her feel like she was a bunny looking for comfort from a fox.
She closed her eyes and held out her hand.
His fingers closed around her more tightly this time, his hand lightly caressing hers before he secured the velvet strap, but he didn’t release her.
Jessa held her breath.
It must be the pregnancy hormones, because she was overwhelmed with intense physical longing, the connection between them seeming to magnify every sensation as he stroked her fiery skin.
She opened her eyes, her lids heavy with desire, and saw an answering arousal on his face that frightened her to her core. This was the man she professed to hate, the father of her child, a man truly worthy of the horrible betrayal she’d bestowed upon him.
So why am I attracted to him?
He stared at her for what seemed a long time, the tension between them stretching out like the bands that held her to the bed. Then the pressure of his hands on her changed, pulling him toward her. "Damn you," he growled.
He leaned in and kissed her, his mouth demanding and rough. She pulled at her restraints, her arms reaching for him, though whether to hold on to him tightly or push him away, she wasn't sure. But she could do neither, she could only take his kisses as she lay beneath him, open and exposed.
Her mind might have been confused, but her body was not, its will made known by the twist of her hips against the mattress and the subtle moans of pleasure coming from deep in her throat.
Jax’s hand came up to her breast and squeezed, shocking her sensitive peak and making her arch her back as she gasped. He deepened the kiss, the hard bridge of his erection grinding into her hip, and she pushed back against him suggestively.
She was vaguely aware of the insanity in her movements and the hot flush of arousal covering her body. She hated him so much, yet that emotion did nothing to douse the flames of desire that flared up when he was near. On the contrary, it seemed to make him that much more irresistible.
He slid his hands under the T-shirt he’d given her, pushing the fabric up to reveal her to him. He exhaled a shaking breath and took one breast in each hand, forcing her nipples out of the holes made by his thumb and forefinger before lapping at each one with his tongue. She cried out in pleasure. She was wickedly aroused, her body screaming and desperate for him to make love to her again as he’d done that first night, knowing his touch held the magic she craved to be free of her past.
"Please, Jax," she begged.
Their eyes locked, her lids heavy with desire.
His hands fell away from her body, and cool air grazed her skin where he’d held her tightly. "This is crazy," he said.
It was as if the world suddenly stopped spinning, everything falling over as momentum turned into a destructive force. She curled her fingers into her palms and bit her lip, hard.
He looked around the room like he’d just awakened from sleepwalking. He stared at her half-naked body. “What the hell am I doing?”
He pulled her shirt down, the blanket up over her, and got up. He scrubbed his face with his palms before leaving the room, closing the door firmly behind him.
Jessa was alone — just as she’d wanted — a frantic sort of desperation her only companion for the night.
25
Jessa awoke to the sound of deep male voices in quiet conversation. When one of them barked with laughter, her eyes popped open.
Cowboy.
She smiled widely and moved to get up, surprised when she realized her hands were bound together with part of the sex bindings from last night and affixed with a tiny padlock.
At least she was no longer attached to the bed. She furrowed her brow, wondering when Jax had made the change.
Cowboy laughed again in the distance. It had been forever since she’d seen him, and forever was much too long to go without seeing a friend like she had in Leo Wilson. He was a ray of sunshine in a world full of raindrops, and she’d missed him terribly.
“Jax, how could you leave me like this?” She looked down at her body. At least she had a shirt on.
She stood and made her way to the top of the stairs. “Jax?” she called down. The men kept talking as if they didn’t hear. She sighed and moved down the steps, stopping short of the doorway to the kitchen. “Jax?” she c
alled again.
“That’s Jessa,” Jax said. “Why don’t you go and say hi?”
“Jessa McConnell?” Cowboy came into view at the bottom of the stairs, and Jessa grinned warily. She was barely covered up and wearing a pair of velvet handcuffs. What would he think of her?
She needn’t have worried. Cowboy gave a loud whoop and opened his arms to greet her, hopping up two stairs when she wasn’t quick enough to leap into his embrace.
“Damn, girl, it’s good to see you.” He pulled back, his eyes scanning from her head to her waist. “Looking sexy, too.” He picked up her hand and furrowed his brow. “What is this?”
“Uh…”
Jax appeared in the doorway, dressed to a T and clearly back in command of his emotions.
And everyone around him.
Her toes curled into the rug.
Jax looked from her to Cowboy and back again. “I see you remember Leo.”
He looked angry, and she felt like she’d done something wrong, though she wasn’t sure why. “Of course I do.”
Jax took a small key out of his pocket and unlocked her wrists.
Cowboy smiled widely. “If I’d known it was that kind of party, I’d have brought my whips and chains.”
Jessa was embarrassed, but Jax just laughed good-naturedly, making her wonder if she’d been right about his anger just a moment before.
“You two seeing each other?” Cowboy asked.
Jessa and Jax answered at the same time.
“No,” said Jessa.
“We’re having a baby,” said Jax.
Cowboy’s mouth pulled into a disbelieving half grin. “Together?”
Jax pointed at her with his chin. “Tell him, sweetie.”
At that very moment, her morning sickness reared its ugly head and she pressed a hand to her stomach.
“Are you okay?” asked Cowboy.
“She’s fine,” said Jax. “Just happy.”
She brought her hand to her mouth and ran for the bathroom, aware and horrified that her ass was hanging out of the back of her shirt. She heard Jax say, “She’s glowing. Don’t you think?” and she wished he were closer so she could throw up on his perfectly shined shoes.
When she was done being sick, she sat on the washroom floor and rested her head in her hands.
She thought back over the last six months. The increasing sense that life was passing her by, her determination to get out of the house where her marriage lived like a ghost that was haunting her present.
So, she’d packed up everything she owned and made a new plan—move to Savannah and start fresh. A new hospital, a new town, a new life.
Then Jax showed up at her door.
She cursed and wiped at her eyes.
She’d thought her days with HERO Force were over, that she’d never see any of those guys ever again. But there he was, standing on her doorstep in the bright sunshine, just waiting to take her newfound independence and throw her back in time.
In the blink of an eye, she was stuck again, the sad young widow who had lost her happiness. And she just about lost her mind.
Hell, maybe I did lose it.
She remembered getting ready to go to the bar and find Jax. She remembered her plan, which was now well executed. Seduce him. Get pregnant. Go on with her life a little better than she’d been before, the replacement of a baby in her womb like a pound of flesh that could make everything better.
Only it hadn’t made anything better at all.
She loved this baby with all her heart and soul, but she knew now it could never replace the one she’d lost. That was the baby she and Ralph had created out of love, and it died when he did.
She stood and started the water running, then stripped and stepped into the tub. A stirring like the tickling of butterfly wings in her lower belly made her gasp.
“Baby,” she whispered, a smile spreading over her face and a joyous giggle rising up in her throat. “Hi, sweetheart.” Then she was crying happy tears, so happy was she to feel her baby move. She didn’t know if she’d ever feel that again after her first baby died, and the sensation meant more to her than she could have imagined.
By the time she made it back downstairs, she was determined Jax was not going to ruin her newfound good mood.
“You’re sure it was him?” asked Jax.
Cowboy’s voice was deep and loud. “Ballistics confirmed the weapon was the same one used in a murder four years ago in Boston. Funny thing is, the defendant’s attorney works for Layton, Felder, Bach & Moore. The weapon went missing during the trial.”
She walked into the room. “What’s going on?”
Jax met her eyes. “It looks like Maria Elena may have been killed by someone from the law firm in Boston.”
“Or someone who worked on one of their cases,” said Cowboy. “The police. The legal staff. Opposing counsel.”
She leaned away from him. “How do you know?”
“Ballistics match from the bullet that killed Maria Elena to the one that was used on an old case handled by the law firm. The alleged shooter was acquitted of all charges.”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” she said. “The lawyers wouldn’t want the heir dead. They don’t benefit.”
“Unless the person connected to the law firm is also Harold’s nephew. I’ll have Logan look into it,” said Jax, opening his cell phone and placing the call.
Cowboy turned to her. “You’re a sight for sore eyes, baby cakes. What do you say I take you to lunch?”
Jessa turned to Jax, who didn’t seem to notice. “Sure,” she said to Cowboy. “I’d like that, if my captor doesn’t mind letting me out of my cage for a while.”
Jax glared at her and she knew he was listening.
“I already asked him,” said Cowboy. “Seems I’m to treat you as an unfriendly and never let you out of my sight.” He laughed.
“I wasn’t kidding, Cowboy,” said Jax.
“Oh, I know it.”
Jessa stuck out her bottom lip.
“Still want to go to lunch with me?” Cowboy asked.
She nodded. “Anything to get out of here.”
26
Jessa picked at her salad while Cowboy took a bite of a big, juicy cheeseburger dripping with fried onions. The smell was appalling. Not that she had any appetite lately, anyway.
“I called you a few times,” said Cowboy.
“I know.” She eyed him sheepishly. “I wasn’t ready to talk.”
“Jax told me about the baby you lost. I’m real sorry, Jessa.”
“Thanks.”
“I hate to think you were going through that all by yourself.”
Her stomach threatened to reject the minestrone soup she’d just consumed, and she put her spoon down with resolve. “What about you, Leo? There anyone special in your life?”
“Always.”
She laughed. “Just one woman?”
He scowled. “Of course not, Jess. Have we met before?” He held out his hand. “I’m Leo Wilson.”
“I see.”
He picked up his mammoth burger. “What about you? Are you really having a baby with Jax?”
“I’m really having a baby, and Jax is technically the father.”
“You couldn’t do any better for father material than Jax.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’s the greatest leader I’ve ever known, and I’ve known some. An honest man. I respect him, and I don’t respect a whole hell of a lot of people.”
He stared at her to the point of making her uncomfortable.
“If you don’t mind me asking,” he said, “how did you two end up together?”
“We’re not together. And just because he’s good at killing people and blowing things up doesn’t mean he’d be a good father. There’s an entirely different set of job requirements for those two positions.”
“Are you kidding me?” Cowboy asked. “Maybe you ain’t never seen him, but he’s great with kids. They run a crack right through that
tough-guy exterior to the gushy middle inside. He wanted kids bad when he was married to Linda.”
“No, he didn’t.”
Cowboy turned his head and eyed her from under his brow. “Yeah, he did. But Linda was on birth control and hiding it. You should ask him about it.”
Coming from Cowboy, Jessa knew it was true, and she felt a pang of sympathy for Jax and his relationship with Linda. First his wife lied to him about having children, then she’d tried to take one away.
Don’t feel bad for him now!
She conjured an image of Jax in her living room, telling her Steele was dead, and the memory had the desired effect. She remembered why she hated Jax Andersson.
“I don’t care what happened between Jax and his ex-wife,” she said.
“Seems to me, you ain’t caring about the people you need to be caring about right now.”
She raised her head. “Excuse me?”
“I’m sure you think you’re doing what’s best, but you’re just watching out for yourself. Being a good mom might be more important to you than anything, but you have to realize you might not be the only person this kid needs in his life.”
“Jax has fewer emotions than a robot. What kind of parent will he be?”
“Your kid couldn’t do better. And if you don’t see that, you ain’t looking at things straight on like you ought to.”
“He’s holding me against my will, Leo. He tied me to the bed so I couldn’t leave. That’s why he jokingly insisted you not let me out of your sight. It’s not a joke at all.”
“He doesn’t want you to disappear with his son or daughter. Can’t say I blame the man for that.”
“He told you that.”
Cowboy nodded. “He did. Can’t say as I believed him at first, but it’s true, ain’t it?”
She looked at the tablecloth.
“It’s hard for me to see two people I care about tear each other apart,” he said. “Worst part of it is, I think if the two of you got your heads screwed on straight, you’d realize you’re the best thing for each other.”