Pony Dreams

by K. C. Sprayberry

  “You rolled tumbleweeds up to the back of the house.” Uncle Andy's voice rang out clear in the silence.

  “Albert and Daniel did it to each side,” Bart announced.

  “Your pa stacked them on the porch,” Paul said. “Everyone in these parts knows Westons don't lie.”

  “You don't lie, do you?” Gabriel smirked. “What about the big one you told Abby for ten years? I bet she hates you for that.”

  “They did it to protect me,” I screamed.

  “Best you hush your mouth, boy,” Sheriff Cove suggested. “A couple of other men spoke to me while Bart and I rode out here. Bill Adams and Zeke Stallings saw what you did.”

  Someone other than my family knew he had destroyed our house and murdered Ma, Pa, and Peter. Now Sheriff Cove could do something about it.

  “Liars!” he shouted. “No one saw us. They're just tryin' to keep us from takin' the Pony contract.” Gabriel glared at me. “You'll pay, gal. Ain't no woman gonna best a Johnson.”

  Before I discovered what he meant, shots rang out. Rocks exploded and pebbly bits showered us. Adam gathered rifles from the horses tethered to the fence, in spite of how they fought him.

  “Bart, Charles, here!” Adam tossed the weapons to them.

  Mark crawled toward me while I stared in amazement at the glints coming from behind the barn.

  “Abby, drop to the ground,” Bart howled.

  Bemused, I took a step toward the barn when the cows mooed.

  Those cows sure are raising a ruckus. Guess it's up to me to take care of them.

  “Mark, get her,” Adam yelled.

  It wasn't all that far. I could find safety inside the barn. Sheriff Cove dropped to one knee and pulled a six-shooter from his holster. Fire spat from the barrel. Someone behind the barn yelped.

  That's Albert! Those good-for-nothing Johnsons are shooting at my family!

  Hot, fiery anger replaced my confusion. I grabbed another handful of rocks. The first one flew over Mr. Johnson's head, but the next found Daniel. He clapped a hand over his cheek. Blood flowed through his fingers.

  “Mow down that wildcat,” he hollered. “No woman hurts me.”

  I pelted rocks at the Johnsons while the sheriff and my brothers shot at them. My missiles hit more of our lazy neighbors than bullets did.

  “Holy heck, you thought you could mess with a Weston,” I shrieked. “Take that. You think you can hide from me. Well, you can't, Albert.”

  Darting forward, I threw more stones. Finally, the Johnsons emerged from hiding with their hands over their heads. Everyone but Adam and Uncle Andy ran over to tie them up.

  The sudden silence scared me. While I fought the Johnsons, I didn't have to think about losing more of my family. I pulled out the locket Ma gave me the night before I left for the station. The cover had a real pretty curlicue on it.

  “Ma,” I whispered. “You can't leave me alone. We just figured out stuff about each other.”

  I dared not think about it, but now I wanted to go back, to feel her tight hug again. To see one of her rarer than gold smiles was worth more than smacking the Johnsons with rocks. How I yearned for another happy afternoon in the kitchen, making an upside down cake. We could have taken the crazy idea further and done it with a pie. The recipe danced through my head while I wished for the impossible.

  “Abby, did they hit you?” Uncle Andy asked. “Are you all right?”

  Was he blind? The Johnsons hit me hard by taking away my ma just as we discovered we really liked each other. I would never be all right again. Pa had promised that he and Ma would take me around after my birthday tomorrow. They wanted me to get to know our neighbors and maybe find a husband in one of their friends' sons. Who would do that now? Where would we live? How could I take care of so many men? Who would help me?

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Icy cold spread throughout my body despite sweat sticking hair against my head.

  “Where did you get the locket, Abby?” Uncle Andy asked. “That's Louisa's. Did she give it to you?”

  His gentle tone penetrated some of my mind numbing fear. I looked at him.

  “Ma gave it to me the night before I left.” My teeth chattered. “She said it was because I'm a woman now.” A lonely tear slid alongside my nose. “But I don't feel like a woman. I want Ma.”

  In spite of Mark's shirt wrapped around his arm, Uncle Andy checked me carefully.

  “It's cold,” I said. “When can we go inside so we don't freeze?”

  “Paul, get a blanket off the horse.” Adam shouted.

  Paul trotted past. His concerned expression scared me even more. What was wrong with me? Why was I falling apart?

  “Where's Ma?” I whimpered.

  “Hang on, baby.” Adam pulled me into a hug. “Paul, where's that blanket?”

  The harshness in his voice made me shake harder. Uncle Andy reached for me, but I clung to Adam. He wouldn't let anything else happen to me.

  “She needs a warm place and something to eat,” Uncle Andy said. “We need to take care of this. It's shock.”

  Shaking his head, Adam lifted me and stomped over to Paul. He had finally managed to pull a blanket away from the back of Mark's saddle and unrolled it. Adam put me on the ground and wrapped the blanket around me.

  “I know that, Uncle Andy. Where do you propose I build a fire to make some food?” he asked. “What will we eat? We don't have pots, dishes, or food, and Abby's not fit to cook.”

  “Don't get angry at me because I lived,” Uncle Andy said. “I'd rather have traded places with them than see this happen.”

  Sheriff Cove stared into the distance. What sounded like thousands of hooves pounded across the desert. Instead of running for cover, my brothers followed the sheriff's gaze. Men wearing blue uniforms with wide brimmed hats rode onto our ranch. Captain Smith led them.

  “Sorry, Sheriff,” he said. “We got sidetracked. Did you have a problem?”

  Adam rubbed his hands up and down my arms.

  “It'll be all right now, Abby,” he murmured. “The Army's here. They'll deal with this. Come on, baby, you gotta fight what you're feeling.”

  I had no idea what he was talking about. Why would the Army take care of things? How could they?

  “Captain Smith, we need a doctor for Abby,” Sheriff Cove said. “Shock.”

  “I'm a doctor,” Uncle Andy said. “I'll take care of my niece.”

  “Looks like you need some help too,” Captain Smith said and raised his voice. “Doc, got a couple of folks that need your help.” He pointed at a wagon near the rear. “Cookie, set up a stove. These folks need a warm meal. We'll figure out a way to shelter them until they get their house rebuilt.”

  “Be right back.” Adam walked over to Captain Smith. “I know this is way out of line, sir.” Adam glanced at me. “It's Abby's sixteenth birthday tomorrow.”

  “Say no more.” Captain Smith shook his head. “We may not have fancy fixings, but I'll speak to Cookie. It's not often he has the chance to bake a cake for a young lady's birthday.”

  The sheriff joked with him about how a slip of a gal tossed rocks at the Johnsons until they gave up. It didn't matter how brave they thought I was. Nothing mattered at all. When a man with a bag like Uncle Andy's ran up, I shied away from him.

  “I won't hurt you, little missy,” he said. “I'll have our cook bring you some tea if you let me check you out.”

  “Uncle Andy's hurt worse,” I said. “Shouldn't you help him first?”

  “Bless you, Abby, but I think the doctor should look you over first,” Uncle Andy said. “You've had a hard time since you got home. Might do you some good to rest for a while.”

  Would that bring back my parents and Peter? Would that change what the Johnsons did? Nothing could. Our good-for-nothing neighbors had robbed me of just about everything I loved. Because of them, I would have to give up training horses. What was left of my family needed me to take Ma's place.

  “Will you tell Pony Bob why I c
an't come anymore, Adam?” I asked. “Make sure he takes care of Blaze for me, so he keeps working for The Pony Express.”

  “Sure will, short stuff.”

  Tears flowed down his face, and he walked away with his head bent down. I tried to go after him, but the doctor carried me to the barn where Mark and Paul made pallets out of hay. After settling me on one, the doctor examined me much like Ma used to.

  “Does anything hurt?” he asked.

  “No, sir, it's all numb. Kind of feels better that way. Hurting isn't fun.”

  “We'll fix that.” The doctor sent Mark for a cup of tea and uncorked a medicine bottle. “I need you to take this.”

  The doctor poured some awful smelling medicine into a spoon. I wrinkled my nose.

  “Open up.”

  Ma and Pa had taught me to obey adults, even if they weren't family. After the doctor tipped the medicine down my throat, I wished I had told him no. It tasted worse than lye soap.

  “Keep making faces like that, and your face will freeze.” He smiled. “I know laudanum tastes awful, but it'll let you sleep until you can handle this.”

  “Nothing will help me handle this,” I mumbled. “It's my fault.”

  “What makes you say that?” He turned around as Mark returned.

  “Adam said you're to drink every drop.” Mark pressed a mug of milky tea into my shaking hands.

  Oh, I would, and then I would give every man on the ranch a piece of my mind. The tea was so sweet it tasted like syrup. That medicine had made me feel so fuzzy and disconnected. My eyes drooped closed as soon as I finished the drink.

  “Paul, tell Adam she'll be all right.” Mark lowered me onto the sweet smelling hay. “Doctor, our uncle has a pretty bad burn on his arm. I'll stay with Abby if you'll look after him.”

  Dreams crashed around me, taking away the pain of losing more of my family. In them, everyone was still alive, every single one of them. David played pranks. Grace and I sang songs. Ma and Aunt Mattie made the most wonderful desserts. Pa and Peter helped in the corral. I hadn't lost anyone. I smiled and fell deeper and deeper into the dream.

  The most wonderful smell woke me. I stretched and sat up, looking around. Adam sat against a hay bale.

  “How do you feel?” he asked.

  Reality hit me hard when I saw the sorrow on his face. The dreams had lied, just like my family had for ten years.

  “I'm fine.” I tried picking hay out of my braids. “This is awful. I'll never get the hay out of my hair.”

  “Let me.” He pulled a comb out of his pocket and undid my braids. “Do you remember me doing this when you were little?”

  “Sort of.” My sadness had returned.

  He gently combed out my hair and braided it in one long tail down my back.

  “We have a surprise for you.” He held out a hand.

  Not sure what to expect, I took his hand and walked outside with him. The rest of my brothers, Uncle Andy, the sheriff, and the army troop stood around a wagon where several cakes sat on the rear gate.

  “Happy Birthday,” everyone shouted.

  It wasn't what I wanted, but they all looked so eager, like they thought they could make me stop hurting if they gave me a party. I sighed and decided to let them think they had done it.

  Adam hugged me from behind. “We wanted to make you feel special today, so you didn't think we'd forgotten.”

  “Thank you,” I said.

  I smiled until my face hurt and ate cake. All the while, I hoped I would feel happier next year.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Sheriff Cove rode out with the Army troop three days later. The Johnsons sat in the back of the cook wagon, their arms tied behind the backs, and a soldier guarding them. Their leaving meant my brothers and I had to comb through the ruins of our home.

  “We need to take care of that.” Adam jerked his head at the charred remains. “We've been lucky these last few nights, but if we don't clear it out varmints will get in there.”

  Silence cloaked the area as we approached the debris. Burned wood and another odor enveloped us. I turned away, but the sickening stench was everywhere.

  “Why don't you stay in the barn until we finish, Abby?” Uncle Andy suggested. “It won't be easy to see.”

  “Let her alone,” Bart said. “She's got as much right as the rest of us.”

  “Maybe she should take Uncle Andy's advice,” Adam said. “You don't want to get the shivers again, Abby.”

  There they go treating me like a baby again.

  So what if I needed the doctor to help me stop shaking? It was not as if any of them hadn't had problems sleeping. Adam woke all of us eight times last night with his shouting and hollering.

  “She can help me out here if she wants to stay,” Uncle Andy said. “We'll need a place to lay them when you find them.”

  What did he mean? Get ready to lay them where? I faced him, and he dropped a hand on my shoulder.

  “I'll need you to hunt up some horse blankets in the barn,” he said. “Can you do that?”

  “Sure, but why?” I asked.

  He blinked hard. It looked like tears glittered on his lashes, but that couldn't be true. Uncle Andy hadn't cried, although I almost caught him at the outhouse yesterday evening. I wrapped my arms around his waist.

  “It's all right if you want to cry a little,” I said. “It might help you feel better.”

  Uncle Andy nodded at someone behind me. I glanced over my shoulder. My brothers walked into the burned out building, pushing away beams and piles of ash. I understood what he didn't want me to see.

  “I'll find those blankets,” I said quietly.

  It only took a few minutes to locate what he wanted, but I spent time playing with the barn cats to avoid the powerful stink. They rolled around and let me scratch their bellies. A black and white mottled kitten purred so loudly that I laughed. The strange sound startled me. It seemed wrong to have so much fun.

  Holy heck! Why does everything have to be so sad?

  When I could no longer put it off, I gathered the blankets and, with the cats trailing me to the door, walked back to the house. Three black lumps lay near the new well. I dropped the blankets beside the bodies.

  It was hard to tell which one was which. The smell nearly made me empty my stomach. I gulped and walked away.

  “When will we bury them?” I asked.

  “You don't have to,” Adam said.

  “I do,” I said. “Let's get on with it.”

  At first, it looked like I would have to argue. Adam groaned and flicked his eyes at Mark and Paul. Without a word, they went into the barn and returned with a handcart. After loading the blanket wrapped bodies, Bart and Charles pushed the cart to a fenced area behind the corral. Three wooden markers stood in a row. I didn't have to look at the names to know who they belonged to.

  We dug one grave and lowered the bodies into it. After we piled the dirt back on top, Adam took off his hat and stared at the sky.

  “Lord, please watch out for them. Don't let Peter climb any haylofts up there. He's a bit unsettled when he gets excited. Ma, Pa, we'll take care of Abby, you don't have to worry about her.” Lowering his head, he kicked at the dirt around the grave. “Anyone else got something to add?”

  I stared silently at the rocks on top of the dirt.

  Ma, I'll take care of them. You'll see. I won't let anything happen to my brothers.

  As I made the promise, it almost felt like her arms circled around me in a hug. The ice inside me melted but not much. I still didn't feel much of anything. Maybe that would change someday, but until then I had a family to raise. Life sure was hard for the only girl in a family.

  I faced my brothers and forced my tears to stop flowing. A grown woman didn't cry over things she couldn't control, but the sight of their devastated faces sure made it hard to act like the adult I had become because of the Johnsons.

  “Don't any of you ever think of babying me again,” I said. “I'm an adult now.”

&n
bsp; The next morning, I leaned against the barn and stared at the wreckage of our house. We had to rebuild, but wood was scarce in the desert.

  “I guess we can live in the barn for a while.”

  Wagon wheels creaked close by. Several horses pranced and whinnied. I leaned into the barn.

  “Someone's coming.”

  My brothers and uncle tumbled from their blankets fully dressed. Seconds later, they stood in front of me. I pushed between Adam and Mark as Sheriff Cove jumped from a wagon filled with planks.

  “Bill Adams and Zeke Stallings caught up with me yesterday,” he said. “They had their boys ride hard to Carson City. The folks up there sent you a gift, to help you get back on your feet.”

  Eleven other wagons parked around the ruined house. Neighbors I hadn't seen in a year walked over to us, but there were no women in the bunch.

  “Howdy, Adam,” Mr. Stallings said. “My missus sent over a mess of fried chicken for lunch.” He waved at the others. “Their wives prepared other stuff so Abby didn't have to worry about cooking for the lot of us.”

  “I ... uh.” Adam shook his head in disbelief. “Thank you.”

  “Where did you plan to rebuild?” Mr. Adams asked.

  “Over there.” Charles pointed at a spot close to the chicken coop. “We figured we'd put up the new house before we cleaned up the old one.”

  “No need for that,” Jeb Hadley said. “There's enough of us to take care of both at the same time. We raided our barns and found enough furnishings and clothes to tide you over.”

  I sidled over to Adam.

  “Do you need my help?” I asked.

  He crouched in front of me. “There's not much you can do until we get the roof and walls up, but you can keep an eye on things and tell us when we're about to make a mistake.”

  The idea of sitting around and thinking scared me. I wanted to work, to stay busy, so I didn't think about the people I no longer had in my life.

  Chapter Twenty-Six