Nearly Mended

by Devon Ashley

  I’d already rushed to the bathroom once to throw up. Then I hid in there until the tears ran dry and Nick refused to wait outside anymore. I loved that he just wanted to hold me through it all, I just didn’t want anyone else to see me break down like that.

  It hadn’t taken too long for the police to realize Friggs had bolted the moment he got to the hospital. Where he went from there, who knew. But I knew what he’d be doing once he healed and reestablished himself. Come looking for me.

  I tried to shut down my mind, to keep it all out, to keep from drowning me to death. But it wasn’t easy. I was slowly breaking apart inside because I was officially scared shitless.

  The new phone we were sharing rang in Nick’s pocket. He pulled it out and told me it was my father. I shook my head in response, so he answered it and stepped away, knowing I didn’t want to hear him update my parents on the nightmare that was my life. He slowly meandered down the hallway, making his way toward their break room, probably in search of something to eat or drink.

  I spotted O’Neill from afar. She’d just hung up the phone and looked to me dismally. No point in sparing me the emotions. She could hardly hurt me with news any more than I’d already been. She rose and approached until she was two feet away. “I thought you’d want to know. They’ve just finished with Zander. He’s free to leave now.”

  I gasped and jumped up. “Already?”

  “He did what we agreed to. He gave us Friggs’ location. You yourself confirmed he was there. His information was solid. We have to let him go.”

  I didn’t listen to anymore. I took off running, taking the stairs down the three flights of stairs. I was out of breath by the time I pushed my way outside the doors and fearfully scanned the parking lot. But I saw him. He’d exited out the door on the back side of the building. He shook his attorney’s hand and watched him drive away.

  “STOP!” I shouted, getting his attention turned my way. We was chuckling long before I got there. He was dressed in pants and a business shirt, so his damn attorney must’ve brought him clothes. As I finished the last of the distance, he turned his head and held up a finger to the town car running behind him. The man behind the wheel, who was dressed in a black uniform, nodded in confirmation.

  “Come to say goodbye?” he said alluringly. His face was almost completely healed and by the way he was standing, his groin was no longer hurting him either. It was like this nightmare never affected him.

  “Does Friggs’ know my real identity?” I blurted quickly. He looked to me curiously, but thinking it well over in his mind. “Please. I have to know. Is there any way he knows where I was originally taken from or my real name?”

  “I heard they screwed it up.” His eyes drifted to the side and he muttered, “Hand the guy over on a fucking platter…”

  His eyes turned back to scan me, focusing on my face more than anything. “Good luck with witness protection.”

  Fucking shocked, I shouted again. “Stop!” He paused but only his head looked back to acknowledge me. “You’ve won, alright. Do you need me to shout it? Fine. I admit it! You got away with it. All of it. You played me from the start in every possible way.”

  Amused, he turned and came to rest before me. He was close enough to take me if he dared. “Easy there, Natalie. If anyone were watching us right now, it would really seem like you were throwing yourself at me. It’s quite desperate actually. Might be enough to make the police believe our relationship was completely consensual.”

  Fuck, I was desperate. This fucker was free to go live his life like he never did one goddamn thing to me. Or to Nick or to Veronica. Or whoever else he had through the years.

  “Please,” I begged one last time, removing that last step between us. I looked him hard in the eyes. “You think I don’t know that deep down you began to care for me? Like really cared.” His weight shifted slightly. “You protected me. You tried to minimize my trauma by drugging me. You didn’t want Friggs to have me then and I know you don’t want him to have me now. So please.” Damn the tears that were welling behind my eyes. “Tell me if he knows who I am.” God it pained me to spit out the next few words… “Because I won’t have you there to protect me next time.”

  A solemn expression overtook his features as he reached out to capture my chin. And I let him. Because I needed him to connect with me in any way that would earn his…sympathy? Empathy? Pity? I’d take any one of them right now. I even let a few tears go.

  Softly, he replied, “I’ll admit a certain fondness for you began to develop. But what about you?” He asked carefully, gently. “Are you still going to deny what was happening on your end?”

  Real tears were streaming down my face, but neither one of us paid them any mind.

  “I’ll admit… I might’ve been becoming more tolerable of our relationship.” I suspected he still expected full honesty in my answer, so I also said, “But Nick is the one I love. He’s good and he’s honest. And he’d never hurt me or put me in a position to be hurt by others. He’s the type of man I want by my side.”

  His fingers fell away from my chin. My heart worked double time, afraid my honesty might’ve just screwed me out of what I needed. After several debilitating seconds, he replied, “He only knows you as Natalie, but he does know you’re from the northwest. Technically, he could search through the missing persons databases to find you, so you should order the police to have you wiped clean from any you were put on. Today. And pray he hasn’t already tried to look you up out of curiosity. Even better, have them fake your death and create a new identity. After all, they’ll probably want your testimony should they ever actually catch him.”

  “And Nick?” I dared to ask, knowing it risked his current generosity of information.

  “Friggs doesn’t even know his name, though you run the same risk if he was put in a public database, because he does know what he looks like.

  “You want the honest opinion of a man who’s been in this organization for more than fifteen years?” I nodded, because I was afraid my voice would shake, even to say a simple yes. “Kill yourselves in a car crash and disappear to the east coast. Friggs has never left the west coast. Hates the east for some reason.”

  “And you?” I forced out. God, when did my body start shaking? I wrapped my arms around myself. I didn’t care if it made me look weak at the moment. I needed the extra stability. “What happens to you now?”

  “I’ve denied witness protection, if that’s what you’re asking. I can hide myself better without their incompetence.”

  My jaw flexed tightly. Angrily, I muttered, “I cannot believe they offered you witness protection.” He was not a fucking victim!

  He chuckled because he knew exactly what I was screaming inside my head. “I’m filled with all sorts of information they’d love to get their hands on. Unfortunately for them, they have no more cards to play right now. Though I’m sure they’ll do their best to keep ties on me.”

  Dumbfounded, my head swayed in disbelief, my hands itching to press into my temples to steady it.

  “Tell me,” he said smoothly. “Do you still think of the night that began in the shower?” My face lost all its resolve, which instantly curled his lips. I turned my head and bit into my lower lip. Yeah, I remembered – kind of hard not to quite frankly. I gave way too much to him that night, both physically and emotionally. I pinched my eyes, trying to shake off the memories that came back to me more times than I’d ever like to admit. Suddenly, his voice was very close to my ear. “Does it get you wet? Make you touch yourself when you’re alone in the shower?”

  I shoved against his chest and took a step back, pleasing him with my reaction. “If it makes you feel any better, it still makes my dick throb. Especially when I play back the video.”

  He winked and my jaw just dropped. He did still have access to everything incriminating. I hung my head back and threw my hands to my hips. Always one fucking step ahead.

  “So what do you think?” he continued to blabber. “Think
witness protection will keep us apart indefinitely?”

  “Oh, please,” I muttered, ready to mouth off. “You’re not seriously going to threaten taking me a third time are you? I’ll admit you’re abduction schemes are effective, although a bit on the dramatic side, but you suck at long term imprisonment.”

  I don’t think I’d ever seen him laugh so hard.

  “Oh, Natalie. No, I’m not going to come for you again. In fact, I have a strong feeling you’ll be coming to me before long.”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “Until next time, Natalie.”

  Frustrated, I threw up my hands as he walked away. “That’s not my name,” I uselessly called out.

  Hardly even angling his head back in my direction, he replied, “I suspect Megan won’t be much longer either.”

  Zander climbed into the backseat of the town car then, the driver shutting the door behind him like he was a powerful man who deserved his automatic respect. Not as if he was a man who just conned his way out of prison and beat a slew of abduction and rape charges.

  Now, not only was Friggs out there seeking a new home base, but the man who kept me prisoner for his own amusement was driving away scot-free without even a slap on the wrist. I had no confidence the police would keep a steady eye on him. And I knew. That in as little as a few hours, he could slip away in the shadows of the night, never to be heard from again, beginning this life all over again with another scared teenage girl.

  Was this seriously the world I lived in?

  “Rachel!” I called out. “I’m home.”

  Since it was Monday, I didn’t have to work the night shift at the steak restaurant I worked at now. It was no Kettle Fusion, or any starred restaurant at that, but at least I got to work in a kitchen and not a sardine can doing a thankless job. Monday and Tuesday nights were the slowest there, so when I was actually scheduled to work those days, they put me on the lunch shift instead. Which was nice, because I actually got to spend some time at night with Rachel.

  I almost snorted. Rachel. It had been almost two months and sometimes I still accidentally called her Megan in private. Sometimes she called me Nick. Just the other day she got pissed at me for a second and called me Nickolas before she could stop herself. She hadn’t yelled at me using my full name in a long time. Which made me laugh, and which finally overpowered her frustration enough to laugh with me and let the argument we were having go. We kept mostly to ourselves like we were asked to by the people in charge of our witness relocation, so luckily, no one else had ever heard us say the wrong names.

  We weren’t entirely comfortable relying on a government program to help us disappear. Not when we’d already learned the hard way that our information was never safe in their hands. But they assured us witness protection was different. That there were precautions put in place and a very few number of people were entitled to access that kind of information.

  So here we were. Jason and Rachel Givens of Redding, California. A married couple who wasn’t really married. Or technically even engaged at this point.

  Not that her ring hadn’t been burning a hole in my pocket for the past month now. But as gorgeous as the scenery was around us, I was determined to wait until we were somewhere outside this house we mostly stayed hidden within. I wasn’t going to let our memory of that moment be tainted by our protection. I didn’t want it to be associated with the worry, and sometimes fear, that we felt living here. For once I’d like us to have a happy memory to look back on, because right now, there weren’t too many to refer to. Even fewer for her since she hardly remembered our time together when she was Claire.

  She came around the corner wearing a fitted tank and yoga pants, already smiling. She leaned in to kiss me on the lips, taking her sweet time before pulling away. My hand stroked down her right arm. Her burn was now a very pale pink, like she exposed it to the sun just a little too long. My thumb caressed one of the ridges that lined her forearm. Those too were significantly thinner than they used to be. They’d never flatten and disappear completely, but she’d finally come to terms that her appearance was what it was. She still preferred to cover up in public to avoid the lookey-loos who just couldn’t help themselves, but with close friends and family, it wasn’t even a thought anymore.

  “Good day?” she asked, taking the stack of mail and flipping through to weed out the crap.

  “Yep. You?”

  “Mmm-hmm,” she murmured. A blue envelope the size of a card caught her eye and she ripped into it. Whatever it was, the outside got her to smile. I grabbed the plastic bags filled with fresh vegetables and turned my back to put them in the refrigerator. When I came back to empty the rest of the grocery bag, her face had gone sour.

  “What?” I asked, already curious who sent her a card anyway, just because it wasn’t anywhere near her birthday. I had assumed it was from her mother, but nothing she’d write would deserve that kind of reaction. She looked up at me, her hand slightly trembling as she passed it over. The outside showed an illustration of a pastel drawing of the world and read: Though we’re worlds apart, I think of you every day. When I flipped it open, I understood her reaction. It was unsigned, but it was clear who wrote the message: If I can find you this easily, he’ll be right behind me.

  I immediately reached for the blue envelope, breathing a sigh of relief when I confirmed it was mailed and not just shoved into the mailbox with the others. Wherever 97006 was, he wasn’t here. But somewhat worrisome was the fact that it wasn’t forwarded by witness protection. It was delivered directly to us because he knew our physical address, which was information even our families weren’t privy to. I sighed and leaned over the island, laying the card out between us. Rachel took the seat on the opposite side, staring down at that destructive piece of paper.

  “Don’t freak out,” I tried to soothe. “Not just yet.”

  Her head shook, but her eyes couldn’t budge from that multi-shaded world. “I’m not. I went straight to numb.” She reached over and grabbed a second envelope. “There’s one for you too.”

  Inspecting it, I noted the same zip code. I rolled my eyes, and since Megan was deliberately jabbing me with the corner of it, opened it with reluctance. Damn shithead. The front showed a naked man on his back, curling forward, trying – and failing – to reach his own cock with his mouth. I tossed it down. I didn’t need to open the inside to know that he wrote something to the effect of missing the pleasures of my mouth.

  At least he reserved that type of shit for me and not Megan.

  “Look, he knows things about us that those other people don’t. It’s not good that he knows where we are, but what was easy for him isn’t necessarily easy for them. We’re in witness protection. Very few people have access to where we are right now. If we need to move every year and have them keep changing our identities, then that’s what we’ll do.”

  Her forehead fell into her hands as she grumbled.

  “Alright. Let me call O’Neill. I know she said she’d call if they ever lost tabs on Zander, but we’ll confirm that he’s still right where they think he is. Then we’ll talk.”

  She awkwardly nodded her head.

  I pulled my phone from my pocket. Rachel finally lifted her head, clamped her hands together in front of her and rested her chin on them while I dialed. Her foot continually tapped against the island, making it loud and clear how anxious Zander’s card had really made her.

  I hit the speed dial for number three, the switchboard for witness protection. We were still allowed to talk to our families and keep in contact with people like O’Neill if we needed to, but no one was allowed to call one another directly. They didn’t even have our new numbers. You called the switchboard and they connected our calls using secure lines. From what I understood, the system didn’t even show the operator phone numbers, simply names that were stored for easy connection. When the operator answered, I asked her to call the O’Neill that was on my list of approved names.

  It was
weird. The moment the phone began ringing on the other side of my call, Rachel’s began ringing behind her, lying on the counter as it charged. Her eyes bulged for a second, then she jumped down for it. She seemed nervous to pick it up. “Hello?” she asked wearily, possibly fearing Zander was calling to follow up on his little note. And just as O’Neill’s voice message began playing for me, Rachel sighed heavily and said, “Mom, this really isn’t a good time. I–”

  A few seconds later her mouth dropped low and her head swung sideways. Just as O’Neill’s voice mail beeped at me to begin leaving my message, Rachel’s hand slightly dropped the phone against her ear. “What?” I asked fearfully.

  Frightfully, she whispered, “Thea’s missing.”

  ***************************************************

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  Devon Ashley is a mom, a wife, a lover and a fighter, a coffee addict, a wicked knitster, a Microbiologist, a baker of fine yummy treats, and someone who will fight you to the death for that last Twinkie bag of M&Ms during the zombie-apocalypse. Seriously, her addiction is that important to her. Oh, and she says seriously way too much. Seriously…

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