The Wizards of Central Park West_Ultimate Urban Fantasy

by Arjay Lewis

  “By Zoroaster!” Drusilicus complained. “Do you know how long I’ve been waiting by this mirror? I’ve been in this bathroom for hours. The others are convinced I am unwell.”

  “Drusilicus,” Marlowe went on, “did any one of the others leave the townhouse this afternoon?”

  “How should I know? I’ve been in the bathroom!”

  “Dru,” Eddie pulled the mirror from Marlowe in a sudden impulse. “We got Doug back.”

  “That is good news!” Drusilicus smiled. “Did you thrash the demon?”

  “We are lucky to be alive,” Marlowe regained the mirror from Eddie. “Find the others, then wait for me. Together I shall bring you to Eddie’s house.”

  “So mote it be,” Drusilicus said as his image disappeared.

  Marlowe returned the mirror to his jacket pocket. “You and your son are home. For safety, I shall enter my townhouse in a state of invisibility.”

  “You’re going to sneak into your own house?”

  “It is as you said, the warlock is one step ahead of us. We can assume that Trefoil told of our plans, but it would be wise to act as if we are being watched. I fear the warlock must this night take another child for sacrifice.”

  “I get it! If you bring the others here, we can watch them to make sure they aren’t the one who is helping Abraxas.”

  Marlowe nodded his head gravely. “By Zoroaster, it is sad when I must look at my oldest associates with suspicion. I shall return as quickly as I can.”

  With that, the older man walked away and left Eddie alone in his back yard.

  Eddie pulled out his cell phone and called Luis.

  “Vasquez,” came the voice on the other end.

  “We got Doug,” Eddie said as way of introduction.

  “Eddie! That’s great, man!” Luis beamed. “I was getting worried.”

  “Well, I walked through catacombs under Central Park and visited an alternate version of Grand Central.”

  “Aw, Jeez, you’re givin’ me a headache.”

  “We found one of our bad guys.”

  “One? You mean there’s more?”

  “Get over here, I’ll do my best to bring you up to speed. Marlowe and the others will be here soon.”

  “Oh good, I get to hang wid de Wizard Posse.”

  “You’re my back up. Tomorrow is the final confrontation.”

  “Okay, I’ll bring a change of clothes, in case I have to stay over.”

  “Graçias, partner,” Eddie said.

  “De nada,” Luis ended the call.

  Eddie walked around his house and headed for the front yard. He was about to turn the corner, when something caught his eye and he backed up.

  A gray van with tinted glass pulled down the street. It had unusually dark glass, almost black. The side was painted with the logo of “Jersey Power & Lighting”.

  Eddie wasn’t a fully trained wizard, but as an experienced cop he could practically smell a stakeout. And in a van like that, it wasn’t NYPD.

  Eddie flattened himself against the side of his house and whispered, “FBI.”

  Cursing under his breath, Eddie returned to the back yard. What was the FBI doing here? Was Wilcox somehow in league with Abraxas, too? That made no sense. However, it would be easy enough for that warlock to manipulate him.

  One more distraction Eddie didn’t need.

  He shouldn’t be surprised. Wilcox wanted him to be guilty of something. However, even Wilcox couldn’t keep up with all his jumping from place to place.

  Eddie considered finding a fountain to wish Wilcox away. He decided that would be a quarter well spent.

  He walked in the back door of his house and right up the stairs to the bathroom. He locked the door and approached the mirror.

  “Marlowe,” Eddie said in a loud whisper. “Hey, Marlowe, you there? Yoo hoo, calling Marlowe.”

  The glass shimmered and Marlowe’s face appeared. “What is it, Eddie?”

  “Thought you should know my house is being watched by the FBI.”

  “Oh my! That cannot be good.”

  “Not for us anyway,” Eddie agreed. “Can you create one of those illusions on your way here? They’re in a gray van across the street.”

  Marlowe’s face creased in concentration for a moment, then his expression relaxed and a beatific smile appeared. “I think I have just the thing.”

  “Okay, well don’t turn them into newts or anything.”

  “Leave it to me, Eddie. You’ll know when we arrive.”

  “Try not to let the entire neighborhood know, okay?” Eddie wanted to tell him, but the old wizard was gone. He spoke to his own reflection.

  Eddie noticed he still carried the old broom handle. He walked downstairs to the kitchen, opened the closet that contained the vacuum cleaner, mops, and brooms, and placed it in.

  He closed the door and pondered what to do with a second staff. Could he choose who would received it? Could he award it to Luis?

  A fantasy passed through his mind of him and Luis, partners for a millennium. Their families might grow and forget them, but they would have each other to depend on, just like always.

  Or he could give it to Cerise! They would have a marriage that would last long beyond their own great-great-grandchildren. And both of them could carry staffs and travel the world without concern.

  Maybe finally go to Aruba.

  Eddie sat at the kitchen table, and realized both of those plans were foolish. He’d been summoned, and was barely able to master the basics of the awesome powers that came with that calling. Tomorrow, he had to fight the demon and warlock who bested Marlowe, killed Trefoil, and outsmarted experienced wizards every step of the way. To give a staff to Luis or Cerise might be emotionally satisfying, but it was a blunder, and the fast track to a quick defeat.

  What would that lead to?

  The end of the world.

  So much rode on the coming confrontation. He might not survive. And if he was dead, Cerise and Luis needed to be able to help each other through the bad times.

  “What’s the matter, dearie?” a voice said.

  Eddie jumped and turned to see his mother as she looked up at him. Her huge glasses were gone, and she appeared years younger.

  “Momma?” Eddie said. “Your hair…”

  “Oh, I know,” Eleanor said, her hand preened her now dark locks. “I went to the beauty salon, got my hair done and dyed. Even got a manicure!”

  She held out her polished nails for Eddie’s inspection. He smiled.

  “I just didn’t feel up to taking care of myself. I thought, what’s the point?” Eleanor sat at the table. “Now I’m just so much better!” She took Eddie’s hand. “And you found our Douglas.”

  “I had help, Momma,” Eddie was suddenly aware of just how tired he was, even though it was only six o’clock.

  “What’s wrong, Eddie?” Eleanor said. “You can tell your momma.”

  Eddie gave a wan smile. “It’s a long story. These people I’ve gotten to know…”

  “Those strange friends of yours.”

  “Yeah,” Eddie grinned. “They’ve kind of got me involved in a case. A big case. And, I might run into trouble.”

  “Big trouble?”

  “Yeah, Momma.”

  "An’ you’re feelin' scared, and a bit out of your league, right about now, dearie.”

  Eddie sighed. “You hit the nail on the head, Momma.”

  “Eddie, all your life you have been able to accomplish anything you set your mind to,” Eleanor held Eddie’s hand tightly. “You were always doing things that made your father and me ask, ‘Where did that come from?’ I think it’s the same thing now. You have to believe that you are the man for the job. Trust that and trust yourself.”

  “Thanks, Momma.” Eddie smiled, as he heard a car pull up out front.

  “Eddie,” Cerise came down the stairs. “I think it’s Luis.”

  “How’s Douglas?”

  “I took him a snack in his bedroom. He’s playin
g away on his Game Boy as if nothing happened,” she shrugged.

  Eddie rose from the table. “I have a feeling that by tomorrow the entire incident will be much less real than any monsters he kills on that machine.”

  “I’ll get dinner ready. Is Luis staying?”

  “Probably,” Eddie replied. “And we may have a few more guests as well.”

  “Now Eddie,” Eleanor chided, “it’s not right to surprise your wife with unexpected company. Can I help you, hon?”

  Cerise beamed at Eleanor. “Delighted, Momma. And Eddie, you are my hero. You invite the whole damn neighborhood if you want.”

  The doorbell rang, and Eddie made his way to the front door. He opened it to Luis’ smiling face as he held a large flowering plant.

  “Hey, amigo,” Luis greeted, and switched hands under the pot he held. He leaned close to Eddie’s head in a bear hug and whispered, “You see the van across the street?”

  “Yeah, I saw it pull up,” Eddie whispered back. His mammoth partner released him, all smiles, and Eddie led him into the house. Luis offered Eddie the plant, which had pointed green leaves and small yellow buds that were in little knots like large, deformed berries. “What is that?”

  “A present,” Luis said. “I didn’t get you anything last night. Maria said I should bring a plant.”

  Eddie took the yellow and green monstrosity from Luis and placed in on the hall table, where it looked large and sad. “What is it?”

  “I dunno,” Luis shrugged. “I went to the flower store and this spooky guy walked in an’ tol’ me that it would be a good gift.”

  Eddie eyed it up and down. “And you bought it, based on that?”

  “Yeah, it was like I couldn’t help myself,” Luis explained. “It is kinda ugly, ain’t it?”

  “Yes, it is. Come on into my office.” Eddie led Luis into a small room off the hall. “You’re gonna stay for dinner.”

  “Okay,” Luis went in and sat on the small couch, which he filled. Eddie crouched next to him and spoke in whispers. “I don’t know if they’ve got listening equipment or not.”

  Luis nodded. “FBI?”

  “That’s my guess. Might be the UCTF.”

  “Wilcox? Well, a car followed me on the drive over. I picked up the tail in two seconds.”

  “Marlowe and his guests are coming,” Eddie stressed.

  “Is that a good idea? With the Feds outside?”

  “What else can we do? Marlowe said he’d make a distraction.”

  “How about a plague of locusts?” Luis suggested.

  “I think they’re already in that van.”

  “Hey! That’s no way to talk. You’re insulting insects up and down the food chain!”

  Eddie smiled and they rose, slipped out of the office and headed to the kitchen.

  “Can I get you a beer?” Eddie offered.

  “Sure, I’m not on duty,” Luis shrugged.

  They walked into the kitchen, where Luis greeted the ladies as Eddie went to the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle. Cerise sent them both away so as not to interfere with the meal preparations.

  They walked into the dining room, where Luis opened his beer and took a long swallow.

  “That’s good.” Luis followed the statement with a loud belch. Then, he paused and listened. “What’s that?”

  “What?” Eddie said.

  “I hear music.”

  “Yeah, right,” Eddie snickered.

  “Eddie, I’m serious. I hear music, like a band.”

  Eddie listened intently and could hear something, though he wasn’t sure what. It was rather like a marching band, but the music possessed a dissonance, giving it an ethereal quality.

  Whatever it was, it grew louder.

  “C’mon,” Eddie motioned and headed for the front door.

  The two men parted the front drapes and peered out. Down the street was a group of people in bright red uniforms who played instruments that sparkled and shimmered in the setting sun’s light.

  Luis and Eddie looked at each other, then walked out of the house onto the lawn. They were not surprised to notice that many of Eddie’s neighbors did likewise.

  “Whaddaya know! It is a marching band,” Luis chortled.

  “That’s what it looks like to you?” Eddie asked.

  “Yeah. Why? What do you see?”

  Eddie stared at the group, then smacked the side of his head with his hand. The marching band, complete with baton-twirlers and drums, faded away and five rather ordinary people stood in their place.

  “Ow!” Luis grunted, puzzled by Eddie’s actions. “Why’d you do that?”

  “Clears my vision,” Eddie did it again. He peered into the distance and saw Marlowe’s beard, Drusilicus’s long hair, Ahbay’s silk vest, Eugenia’s dress, and Bankrock’s tweed jacket.

  Eddie looked at the van and shook his head. If they were videotaping everything that came and went, what would the camera see? Would it show only the illusion, or film the five people who approached?

  He didn’t know.

  The band grew louder as it drew nearer, and Cerise, Douglas, and Eleanor came out the front door.

  “Dang!” Douglas bubbled. “It’s a band!”

  “Hey, nice to see you, little guy,” Luis smiled to Doug.

  “I ain’t so little,” Doug squinted up at the big man.

  “I’m not so little,” Cerise corrected.

  “You are to me, Cerise,” Luis joked. “And kid, you are practically tiny.”

  Luis bent and picked up the giggling boy and put him on his shoulder.

  “Dang!” Doug announced. “I’m as tall as a tree! I can see everything!”

  Eddie closed his eyes, then opened them as he tried not to allow the illusion to affect him. But the band appeared as real as could be.

  The musicians began to pass their house, and several of the phantasms walked right up on the Berman’s lawn and played their instrument directly at Eddie and his family.

  Almost on instinct, Eddie stepped aside and opened the front door of the house to leave a clear pathway.

  “Why’d you do that?” Luis queried.

  “Just a hunch,” Eddie slapped the side of his head again.

  Sure enough, a drummer drew near the house, but Eddie saw Marlowe pass beyond the crowd and through the front door, invisible to all but him. The others only saw the musician who beat his drum, and returned to the rest of the band.

  The situation was repeated four more times, as Drusilicus, Ahbay, Eugenia, and Bankrock passed from the illusion of the marchers to the reality of the house, while Eddie watched the whole thing.

  This required him to slap himself silly, which drew strange looks from both Eleanor and Cerise.

  Their mission accomplished, the marching band continued its trek down the street to depart back to the oblivion from which it was called. The Teaneck residents, unaware that they watched nothing but empty air, gave a round of applause before they wandered back to their homes.

  As family and partner watched the band retreat, Eddie entered the house. He walked quickly up to Marlowe and whispered in his ear, “There are people who might be watching us.”

  “Don’t worry, Eddie,” Marlowe didn’t lower his voice. “I have taken the liberty of surrounding your house with a protective field. It will disrupt any device, physical or magickal.”

  “Yes, we avoid dealing with mortal law enforcement,” Bankrock approached, a bit miffed.

  “There might be bugs in the house,” Eddie fretted.

  “Your house has vermin?” Ahbay declared, appalled.

  “Listening devices, little radios,” Drusilicus explained.

  “Oh!” Ahbay responded. “These will not work, either.”

  “No need for concern,” Eugenia comforted, “the spell is quite effective.”

  Eddie exhaled in relief. “That’s good. But what if they videotaped the marching band?”

  Ahbay and Eugenia turned to Marlowe as if unsure what videotape was.


  “No matter,” Marlowe beamed. “They will find something is wrong with their equipment.”

  “If that is all decided,” Drusilicus complained, “can we get to the matter at hand?”

  “Yes.” Bankrock held out his leather binder and began to take notes. “The Staff of Water must be assigned. I want to make certain all regulations are followed to the letter.”

  “Bankrock, really,” Marlowe clucked peevishly. “As Coven Master, I have the power to select a new candidate—”

  “It’s bad enough that Mister Berman was summoned,” Bankrock retorted. “I must be here.”

  “It is up to us to select who will bear the Staff of Water,” Marlowe said with a nod to the others.

  “I hope by this time we all realize whom is the most qualified,” Drusilicus boasted.

  “Who,” Bankrock corrected.

  “What?”

  “You said ‘whom’, it’s ‘who’.” Bankrock repeated.

  “I don’t care if it is who, how, or why,” Drusilicus argued. “We must choose!”

  “Hold on a minute,” Eddie said, “I think—”

  Doug stepped into the house and called out. “Mom, there’s a bunch of weirdoes in our living room.”

  Cerise walked through the doorway, and her jaw fell open. She quickly shut her mouth. “Now, Douglas, it isn’t polite to refer to your father’s guests as weirdoes. You go upstairs, and I’ll tell you when dinner is ready.”

  “Hey,” Doug pointed at Marlowe. “I know you.”

  “That you do, young man,” Marlowe agreed with a glimmer in his eye.

  “My goodness,” Eleanor came in through the front door. “We have company.”

  “Yes, Momma,” Cerise sensed that Eddie was uncomfortable with his mother there. “Can you help me in the kitchen?”

  “But I thought I would—”

  “In the kitchen, Momma, please,” Cerise pleaded.

  Eleanor looked from face to face. “Oh, yes, I suppose you’ll all stay for dinner.” She then hurriedly followed Cerise out of the room.

  “Son,” Eddie instructed Doug, “you go upstairs like your momma told you.”

  “Do I haveta?”

  “Yes!” Eddie snapped.

  One look in his father’s eyes made Doug decide not to push his luck. “Dang!” he muttered as an exit line and bounded up the stairs.