The Love in his Heart

by Indiana Wake

  Holding the roll of notes tightly in his grip, Jimmy immediately set off in search of Drake Darcey.

  He found him in no time wandering about in the kitchen of the ranch house with a confused look on his face.

  “Come on in, Jimmy,” Drake said vaguely. “Just give me a minute will you, I’m just looking for something.”

  “It wouldn’t be this, would it?” Jimmy said, feeling a little nauseous as he held the tight roll of bank notes out in front of him.

  “It sure would.” Jake frowned. “But what are you doing with it?”

  “To be completely honest, I don’t know,” Jimmy said and felt strangely guilty, as if his boss of five years wouldn’t believe him. “But I swear to you now, Drake, that I didn’t take it from you.”

  “I would never have thought it of you,” Drake said, although he still looked a little confused.

  “Jerry Croston has just re-shooed my horse,” Jimmy began.

  “I know, he was just in here looking for his money. That’s when I realized a roll was missing.”

  “When he’d finished, I straightened up the saddle and stuffed my food into the saddlebag for the day.” Jimmy hoped it would sound believable, even though it was nothing but the truth. “And that’s when I found this. It was stuffed into the very bottom of the saddlebag, I had to tease it out.”

  “I wonder who put it there,” Drake said and finally reached out to take the roll of money that Jimmy held aloft.

  “Drake, it wasn’t me,” Jimmy said. “I know it was my saddlebag, my saddle, my horse, but I can’t do any better than the truth. It wasn’t me.”

  “For God’s sake man, take a breath. I know it wasn’t you; as if it could be.” Drake laughed.

  “Thank you.” Jimmy breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Now, why on earth would I ever think it was you? You’ve worked with me since you were a boy, Jimmy, and I’ve never had a minute’s trouble with you.” And with that, Drake ruffled Jimmy’s hair as if he was still a boy of fourteen. “Now come on, let’s have a think about this.”

  “I’m at a loss,” Jimmy said, and he truly was.

  “Well, think about it. Have you had a falling out with one of the other ranch hands?”

  “No, nobody. We’re all friends, we have been for years. There’s not a man who works on the ranch I’ve had any problem with,” Jimmy said, and then the penny dropped.

  But how on earth had one of the cowboys, most specifically Ray Burnett, made their way into the kitchen of the ranch house? He would have stood out like a sore thumb. The ranchers who worked closely with Drake sure were a regular sight, often sitting around the kitchen table in the winter as Drake’s wonderful wife ladled out hot soup for them.

  But one of the newcomers would have stood out, would have looked suspicious. They worked on the outer reaches and reported back to their boss at the end of the day. It was as simple as that. There was no closeness, no conversation, and no hot soup.

  “Maybe when you’ve calmed down about it all, Jimmy, something will come to you. And mind you come to me when it does, because I’m not having this sort of spite going on here on my ranch. I’m not having men setting each other up for a firing, and I’ll see the fool out of here just as soon as I know his identity.”

  “Well, I guess I’ll go out there and join the rest and have a good long think, Drake,” Jimmy said, wondering at his own reluctance to give up Burnett immediately. “And if anything comes to me, I’ll wander back down.”

  “You see that you do,” Drake said and smiled. “And thanks for bringing this back. Not everybody is as honest as you, son.”

  12

  “Jimmy?” Janet said as she walked through the garden to see none other than her old friend sitting on the porch seat waiting for her. “Now there’s a thing, I was just talking about you today.”

  “All good, I hope?” Jimmy chuckled.

  “Real good,” Janet said and felt suddenly emotional.

  She wanted to run through the garden and fling herself into his arms and sob, but she knew she couldn’t. She just slowed her pace a little and blinked hard until the tears which threatened to make their way free had been firmly put back in their place.

  “How are you?” he asked, rising to his feet when she finally reached the porch.

  “I’m well, thank you. I was just talking to Connie Langdon about you today in the diner. I said it had been a real long time since I last saw you and that I was kind of missing you.”

  “Well, I reckon I miss you too, Janet. I suppose I miss the constant chatter. It’s funny, you know, it’s real silent, like when the fiddlers suddenly stop playing in the town barn.” He grinned at her, his blue eyes almost closing as he did so.

  She’d forgotten just how large a man Jimmy was, and how masculine. For some reason, in the long weeks since she’d last seen him, every time Janet drew him to mind it was always to see him as the boy he had once been. All bright red hair and long legs, not the rich brown-red hue he now enjoyed and the well filled out limbs and torso.

  “Hardy-ha-ha, Jimmy Dalton,” Janet said, feeling her throat tighten as the old words she had always spoken with ease forced their way out. “You forget, you can do a fair streak of talking yourself.”

  “Only because I had such a good teacher.”

  They stood looking at one another for a moment, Jimmy seeming suddenly a little awkward. She realized that they both were a little emotional to see each other again and she knew that Jimmy very likely wanted to embrace her as much as she wanted to embrace him. But neither one of them made that move, they simply stood there looking at one another.

  “Well, are you coming in for something to drink? Or your dinner? I’m sure Ma Grace has plenty, she always does.” Janet wondered if this was the moment they would be able to get their old friendship back.

  Perhaps enough time had passed for them to pick up where they left off, for life to return to normal as far as they were concerned, notwithstanding the fact that she had no intention of giving up on Ray.

  “No, I wasn’t going to stay long. I just thought I’d come out and see you for a few minutes.”

  “All right, well, shall we sit?” Janet looked at the porch seat.

  “Yes, let’s sit.”

  Janet realized that, when they both sat down, each left a somewhat more sizeable gap between them than they had ever done before. It was another silent reminder that things were not as they had once been, and Janet felt sad again, unsettled, as if she didn’t quite fit right in her own body.

  But at least this was a start. They were talking, they were in each other’s company, just as she had spoken about that morning with Connie. If Jimmy was willing to put in the effort, Janet was absolutely determined to do the same.

  The last of the afternoon sunshine fell across the corner of the ranch house, the sun so low now in the sky. It just caught the top of Jimmy’s head, making the red stand out against the brown of his hair.

  “You were always more red-headed in the sun,” Janet said as she stared at him.

  “And you were always more hot-headed in the sun. Like that time you climbed the tree out back. I’ll never forget it, me standing at the bottom begging you not to go any higher and you grinning like a fool as you scampered up branch after branch.”

  “That seems like a long time ago now. Although, I don’t suppose it really is that long ago since we were out there climbing trees.”

  “I reckon you could still do it now.” Jimmy laughed.

  “Oh, I know I could,” Janet said and suddenly wanted to grab his hand and cart him around to the back of the house where that old tree still stood.

  “Oh, Janet,” Jimmy said suddenly looking down at the wooden flooring of the porch a little desolately.

  “What is it?” she asked, hoping that he wasn’t about to say something heart-breaking.

  “I guess I have something I want to talk to you about. Something I want to tell you.”

  “And what’s that?” Janet was feel
ing awkward and unsettled so suddenly that she felt sideswiped by the feeling.

  “Somebody at work tried to set me up today.”

  “Set you up? What do you mean?” Janet had a horrible feeling that Ray Burnett’s name was finally going to be mentioned.

  “Somebody took a roll of notes from Darcey’s kitchen and stuffed it in my saddlebag hoping that I would be found with it.”

  “That’s ridiculous, Drake would never believe you’d steal from him.” Janet tried to swallow down the strange sensation of her heart beating in her throat.

  “Luckily for me, you’re right. I took the money into Drake just as he had begun to search for it. I guess I was lucky I found it when I did, but I suppose Drake would never have really believed it.” He paused for a moment. “But that’s not really the point, is it?” Jimmy suddenly didn’t seem as jovial as he had done moments before.

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Come on, Janet. You’re just about the brightest person in this town and I know you know what I’m trying to tell you.”

  “But Ray works out on the plains. He’s not on the ranch. How would he ever get into Darcey’s kitchen? I’ve been there, I know how it all works. I think you want it to be him, and that’s the truth,” Janet said firmly, although the truth was she felt a little shaky.

  “I don’t know how he got in and out of the kitchen unseen, but I’m certain he did.”

  “But why? Why would he do that to you?” Janet asked, and her fear was making her angry. “He never goes on to the ranch. He works out on the plains, you know this.”

  “I’ve seen him on the ranch lands before, Janet.”

  “Yes, I suppose he has to speak to the boss now and again, doesn’t he?”

  “Look, I can see you starting to get angry with me, but I’m not going to be silenced by that. I’ve seen him sneaking across the ranch lands, Janet.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You know what, he’s a little bit more devious than you give him credit for. He was late or absent for some other reason a couple of weeks ago and I came face-to-face with him on the north fields of the ranch. He was coming across from the east, trying to keep cover so that nobody would see him coming in late.”

  “I know, he was late one morning. I’d seen him in the town and he said that John and Garrett just let him sleep and had gone on without him. I mean, I know he was late, Jimmy, but it’s hardly the worst crime in the world, is it?” Janet could hardly believe what she was hearing.

  Jimmy had taken one simple mistake and blown it up out of all proportion.

  “No, it’s not. But trying to set another man up for theft is. And Drake Darcey for one isn’t keen to let it go, I can tell you.”

  “Oh, my God, please tell me that you haven’t run off at the mouth with your boss and told him about your little suspicions?” Janet suddenly felt as if she’d been turned upside down.

  She was immediately thrown back into the often-practiced scenario, the one where Ray climbed up onto his horse and left town forever. If Darcey fired Ray, there would be nowhere else in town for him to work, especially not if word got out that he’d been thrown out for theft.

  “No, I haven’t said anything to Drake. Although I knew straight away, without a doubt.”

  “Jimmy, that’s not fair.”

  “You need to tell Burnett that I didn’t fall for it. And tell him that Darcey didn’t fall for it either. He might not have worked anywhere for more than two months at a time, but I’ve been at Darcey’s for five years. And if your man has any ideas about repeating this behavior ever again, I’ll go straight to Drake with it.”

  “Jimmy Dalton, if you tell Drake Darcey the nonsense you just told me, I’ll never forgive you.” Janet felt suddenly furious.

  She was utterly convinced that Jimmy was only there with a tale that would turn her against Ray. So, his calm acceptance was nothing more than an act after all. She loved Jimmy dearly, but she was beginning to fall in love with Ray and she felt the old irritation of not being able to move, of being trapped by other people’s expectations and wants.

  And now Jimmy was to join them.

  “And if Ray Burnett ever interferes in my world again, Janet, I will never forgive you.” Jimmy’s words were spoken firmly, and Janet knew she had never heard such a tone of voice from him before.

  He truly sounded like a man now, and a man whose patience had been tested at that.

  “Well, I reckon that’s not really the thing you wouldn’t forgive me for, is it? You’re only here now because you don’t forgive me for having my own life. That’s what this is all about, Jimmy Dalton, and don’t you think I can’t see it.” Not only did she feel angry, she felt humiliated, almost guilty, and it was only feeding her fury. “I don’t ever want to hear one of your stories again, and that’s the truth. I’ve made my choice, because I’ve every right to make my own choices. And if you don’t like it, well, that’s just darn tough. Just because you’re in love with me doesn’t mean I have to be in love with you. You don’t own me.”

  “Of course, I don’t own you,” Jimmy said, and his voice was suddenly calm again. “I never thought I owned you. Nobody owns you, whatever the sights and sounds of this town might lead a girl to believe over the years. Nobody owns you,” he said again. “And you’re right, you have made your choice. You’ve chosen your world and just who and what you want in it and that is, just as you said, your right. But whatever your world is now, it can’t encroach on mine, because everything I told you today is true. Right now, I’m past caring whether or not you believe me. It doesn’t matter, not anymore. But trust me when I tell you that Burnett gets this one chance. You might trust him, but I don’t, and I won’t have him interfering in my life, in my plan. So, enjoy your world, Janet, just keep it the hell away from mine.”

  Not once had Jimmy lost his temper, not once had he spoken to her roughly. But as he got up and walked down the porch steps and away through the garden, tears ran down Janet’s face. She was shocked by the whole episode and knew then that her old friendship with Jimmy was finally over.

  Maybe this was his way of trying to get back to their old lives, but the truth was that Janet knew Jimmy well enough to know that he wasn’t the sort of man to make up silly stories just to get his own way.

  But at the same time, she couldn’t begin to imagine that Ray would behave so badly. Either way, Janet knew she would have to get to the bottom of it or she would never settle.

  13

  “I sure have missed you, darlin’,” Ray said, meeting her at the door of the diner once again as she closed up for the night. “I haven’t seen you for days. I hope you haven’t gone off me now.” He chuckled, but it was clear that he was a little unsure.

  “No, not at all.” Janet smiled. “I’ve just had a strange couple of days is all. I’ve not been at my best.”

  Ray looked as heartbreakingly handsome as ever, his hair looking so sun-kissed without his broad-brimmed hat. He held out his arm and she took it.

  “You have time for a walk?”

  “Not really, I promised Ma I would help her with Katie’s dress tonight. She’ll be expecting me.” She saw his face drop. “But maybe you could walk me home?” She smiled up at him.

  “Well, that sure would be a treat.”

  They walked in silence for the first couple of minutes, the feeling of unrest as strong as it had been since she and Jimmy had argued.

  She felt as if she had been awake for days, and she had. Her sleepless nights were filled with guilt that she had not instantly believed her old friend. And then, of course, there was the guilt that she could even think for a moment that Ray would be capable of such a thing. It seemed as if there was far too much guilt to go around and she just wished she could either get to the bottom of it or forget about it altogether.

  “You really are down,” Ray said, taking hold of the hand which rested on his arm and stopping her walking altogether. “Come on, what is it? What’s eating you?”
<
br />   “It’s nothing, really.”

  “I can see it in your eyes, Janet. You know, if I’ve done something to upset you, you could just tell me. I would rather know, then I can put it right.” He pulled her closer to him, whispering in her ear. “I don’t want to lose you.”

  “I don’t want to lose you either,” Janet said, feeling the strange warmth of belonging once again. “I just had a row with Jimmy, that’s all.”

  “You’ve seen Jimmy?” Ray seemed to bristle for a moment and Janet had to remind herself that a girl having a man as a best friend was probably something her new beau had never encountered before.

  After all, it was kind of unusual when all was said and done.

  “He called around to see me. It was the first time I’ve seen him since you and I first went out together.”

  “Well, he is probably just a little bit jealous,” Ray said tartly. “But I reckon he will get over it in time. He’s a grown man, isn’t he?”

  “Yes, he is a grown man,” Janet said. “And I don’t think he’s jealous. I mean, it’s not as if he’s waiting on the porch every night when I go home, is it?” Janet remembered her harsh words to Jimmy, how she had almost mocked his love for her, and felt terrible.

  “So, what did he want then?”

  “Well, he’s my friend, so he doesn’t really need a reason to see me,” Janet said and wondered where the little flash of defiance had come from. “But he actually had a little bit of trouble at work and he wanted to talk it over with someone. With a friend.”

  “Oh, I see.” Ray seemed to think better of his own little outburst of jealousy. “Well, I am sorry to hear that. I thought things went along for him just fine at Darcey’s place.”

  “Somebody tried to get him fired,” Janet said, realizing that she had suddenly chosen to believe Jimmy.

  She realized then that if she hadn’t believed Jimmy all along, she probably wouldn’t have even mentioned it to Ray. She felt down, very, very down.