Deck of Cards

by Johnson, ID

  As Katey entered the room, she saw Caleb standing in front of a massive window. He was peering out at the back garden, apparently deep in thought. The room was full of bookshelves, at least three stories high, and Katey looked at them longingly, wishing she could spend all day in here. But, as long as she was Rose, the servant girl, that would not happen. As she crossed the room, he gestured for her to take a seat on the settee and he sat down next to her, leaving a polite amount of space between them.

  It took him a moment to collect his thoughts. She was lovely as always and he was distracted by her beauty and by the importance of the message he was trying to convey. He took a deep breath before he finally said, “Rose, I want to thank you for agreeing to meet with me this morning. I know I wasn’t particularly polite yesterday, and for that, I sincerely apologize.”

  She would not look at him but she nodded her head slowly. He wasn’t sure if she was agreeing that he was rude or accepting his apology. Either way, he decided to continue.

  “My men have been searching the area around Blackthorn these past few days and they have not been able to find a trace of Matthew. This concerns me because I know that Leopold has sent his cavalry out to search for him as well. If they find him, well, we are back to the same position we were in six months ago.” She looked up for a moment, indicating that she had an understanding of what he was referring to.

  Katey shuttered at the thought of Matthew becoming a prisoner again and, as horrific as being Philip’s prisoner was, she could only imagine that being a prisoner in Leopold’s castle must be far worse. She had heard stories of nobles in oubliettes, crying out in agony as their flesh rotted from their bodies, Leopold gazing down at them through a hole in the floor, spitting in their wretched, dying faces. His voice brought her back to the conversation though she still held visions of horror in her mind’s eye.

  “Are you aware of the events of these past few years, the ones leading up to Matthew’s imprisonment and our quest to free him from Philip’s clutches?” Considering her station, he wasn’t sure she knew the details of what had brought Matthew to that prison cell and he felt that, if she truly cared about his brother, knowing all that he had gone through might inspire her to be more helpful.

  Katey knew everything, of course. In fact, she probably knew more detail than Caleb did, at least from Matthew’s perspective. She nodded her head, indicating that she was aware of all that had happened.

  “You know that Matthew was kidnapped just a few months after his marriage to Queen Maggie of Zurconia? That she was nearly killed in the attack by one of her most trusted servants, that her mother was poisoned, and that Matthew served six months in that tower simply because Philip sought vengeance on behalf of a dead uncle?”

  Again, Katey nodded vehemently. Yes, she knew all of that. She also knew exactly how Maggie had writhed on Matthew’s lap, how he had thought she was dead, how he had stabbed Berkley in the name of his wife, the queen. She knew how he had gone days with no water and very little food. She knew that he dreamt of his friends and family back in Arteria and wanted nothing more than to be reunited with them. She knew all of those things and more. But she did not know anything that could possibly be of value to Caleb in locating his brother and she had no way of making him see that.

  He was growing more frustrated. He had been hopeful that he could shed a knew light on the situation for her and that it would somehow make her see the importance of talking about the conversations she had had with Matthew. Perhaps there was some detail in his brother’s words that might convey some hidden meeting to him. He leaned back, pausing to collect his thoughts, to maintain his composure.

  Finally, he decided to take a different route. “Have you always been mute?” he asked as gently as he could, though it was not a gentle question.

  Though she had been asked that question more times than she cared to count, she was still shocked each time she heard it. To her, it was sort of like asking, “Have you always been a girl?” or “Have you always been able to breathe?” Even though she had spoken earlier in her life, for the most part, yes, she had always been mute. So, generally speaking, whenever she was asked that question, she always said yes.

  But today, for some reason, she didn’t. Perhaps it was because she thought Caleb could identify with her. He knew the type of tragedy she had gone through. He knew what it was like to have someone you love ripped away from you and to feel at least partially responsible. Before she answered, she glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. Those piercing blue eyes were looking straight through her, into her very soul and, even if she had wanted to choose the easy answer and just say yes, she felt he would see the truth. She looked away, biting her bottom lip. Taking a deep breath she slowly shook her head, “No.” No she had not always been mute. But she wished she had always been.

  He sat forward, astonished. That was not the answer he was expecting. “You used to speak?” he asked, clarifying his understanding. She confirmed that he had understood. There was a time when she spoke, just like everyone else.

  He was not looking at her as he continued. It was almost as if he was speaking aloud to himself, though his phrasing indicated he was in fact talking to Katey. “Perhaps, it’s possible then, that you might be able to do it again. Have you tried? Recently? Have you tried to speak? Maybe, if you really wanted to, maybe you could.”

  Katey sighed. What he didn’t understand was that, even if she could speak, she had nothing to tell him. No, she had not tried to speak. She had never tried, not once, not since she was four years old. But she had made a sound yesterday when she saw Maggie. And she had also gasped aloud when she saw Caleb for the first time.

  She could tell by his tone that he was desperate. And she so wanted to be able to help him. But she knew she couldn’t speak. Even if she wanted to say something, she was quite certain that she didn’t remember how. Rather than sit there on the settee, making strange gasping and wincing noises, she tried something else. She turned to him, careful to avoid his eyes, and gestured for a pen and paper.

  “You want to write?” he asked. She nodded and he stood, hurrying across the room to a large desk, hoping to find and ink well and some parchment there. He didn’t know why this hadn’t occurred to him before. Perhaps he just wasn’t use to commoners being able to write. But he knew she could because she had written on the map. When he reached the desk, he frantically searched all of the drawers, coming up empty-handed. “I’ll be right back,” he said and left the room off in search of the necessary tools.

  While he was gone, Katey did something she hadn’t dared do for over fifteen years. She cared so deeply for Matthew and, despite the fact that Caleb made her extremely nervous, she was also developing feelings for him as well. She knew that every thing he did was out of love for his brother, even those acts that threatened or terrified her. So, while he was away, she began to stretch her vocal chords, attempting to make a sound, any sound. She was not trying to speak, not yet. She just wanted to see if she was capable of making a noise on demand.

  She tried several times in the few minutes that he was gone. But nothing happened. She wasn’t able to make even the tiniest squeak. Perhaps, in time, if she continued to practice, it might be possible for her to regain her voice. But, as for right now, there was no way that she could possibly answer Caleb’s questions.

  When he returned with the ink well, paper and quill, he found her visibly upset. Placing the items on a small table next to the settee, he sat down beside her, placing his hand on her arm gently, “It’s alright,” he said. “I didn’t mean to upset you. We’ll find a way to communicate.”

  She wiped away a few stray tears, glad to see this more sensitive side of him, but also wondering if, perhaps, he was only being so sweet because he thought she had something of importance to say. If she wrote what she had planned to write, she was afraid that he would become angry and frustrated again and she began to contemplate the possibility of lying to him, just to make him happy.

&nbs
p; Finding her in tears just now had touched him for some reason, even though he was aware that he had made her cry much harder yesterday. He became very cognoscente of his hand was on her arm almost as soon as he had placed it there and he wished he hadn’t done so. He did not need the distraction of a beautiful woman right now, especially if the rumors about this one were true. As she began to regain her composure, he withdrew his hand and waited patiently to see what she might write.

  Katey leaned forward toward the small table in front of where they sat. It was further away than she had anticipated and Caleb slid it towards her. She nodded in appreciation. It had been a while since she wrote anything with a quill but she thought she would be able to do it with little problem. She knew she had to tell him the truth, no matter how angry it might make him that she knew nothing of where Matthew might be. She chose her words carefully, hoping to avoid adding to his already frustrated and distraught state.

  After a few minutes, she handed him the paper, placing the quill back in the ink and sliding as far away from him across the sofa as was possible. As he read, she followed his eyes, trying to read his expression and praying that he would understand.

  Your Majesty,

  I have been mute for almost 15 years. In this time I have never found any reason whatsoever to force myself to speak. That being said, I care deeply for the welfare of your brother and would do anything to help you find him. While you were away, I attempted to make a noise. However, I was not able to do so. If you insist, I will demonstrate for you. Nevertheless, I am sad to report that I have no information to give you regarding King Matthew’s whereabouts. I visited him in his cell. I brought him food and water. I listened to him tell wonderful stories about his life, about his bride, and about you. I did what I could to help him escape, including drawing the map. But, alas, I do not know where he might be. I am so very sorry that I cannot be of better assistance.

  She had not signed it. She could not sign it as Rose and she did not know

  what the consequences might be if she revealed her true identity under these circumstances.

  When he finished reading the letter, he folded it and sat it back on the table. He didn’t speak for a few moments and she was afraid to look at him again, not only because she was frightened to see his response but also because she longed to reach out to him, to comfort him.

  Caleb was disappointed by the contents of the letter. But, at least, he felt that he knew for sure now that she could be of no further assistance. He felt a little foolish for being so insistent but he just could not leave any stones unturned. Finally, he spoke, though he did not turn to look at her. “Very well then,” he said, “thank you for your cooperation and your attempts. Your loyalty is appreciated.”

  It was a canned response, something he might say to someone who brought flowers to a coronation or helped pass out alms to the poor. She understood. She had disappointed him and there was nothing she could do to make it better. Not only could she do nothing to find Matthew, she had given the king false hope of locating his brother.

  Once again, she felt as if she might start to weep.

  After a few moments of sitting next to each other in complete silence, he stood. He didn’t dare turn to look at her, sensing that she was about to cry. He was afraid of how he might react at seeing her tears right now. He opened his mouth as if he were going to bid her farewell but then closed it again, shaking his head and leaving the room.

  Katey didn’t bother to stand or curtsey as he left either. She was nothing but a harlot turned kitchen wench to him now and she would be surprised if he ever spoke another word to her. If only there was something she could do to help—anything at all. But she could think of nothing. Reluctantly, she stood and walked towards the door. She would go change into her kitchen dress and see about helping Cook. At least she could be useful in that regard.

  Though Caleb knew Noel was fully capable of seeing to the task at hand, he had spent enough time at home while Matthew wondered around in a forest somewhere. He determined to leave as soon as possible to ride back to Blackthorn and begin searching himself. He went off to search for Dale to let him know he was leaving him in charge of the forces protecting the castle. He would also have to stop by the kitchen and say good-bye to Cook.

  He was thoroughly disappointed in the result of his conversation with Rose. Perhaps it was that endearing quality he had noted earlier that made him think that she would be able to come to his aide. When she smiled, it seemed like the whole world would find a way to right itself. But he knew that it was just an illusion, she was just another pretty girl, a loose one at that, and despite the way she made him feel when he was in her presence, she could not help him find his brother. At least she had attempted to make a sound while he was gone. That was something. He had considered asking her to try in front of him, just to be sure she could not do it, but he had determined to take her at her word. As long as she was doing everything within her power, how could he be angry with that?

  When he met up with Dale, he was informed that Noel has sent word of another day of minimal progress. He couldn’t believe how difficult it was proving to move a pile of rubble away from a doorway! Leopold’s cavalry was pushing farther south but every time his men attempted to engage them, they would disappear into the distance. By the time he was finally on his way to bid ado to Cook, his blood was boiling. He considered skipping it and going on without telling her he was leaving, but he thought better of it, knowing he would pay for it later. And then he heard a sound that sent him far past his breaking point.

  ***

  When Katey arrived in the kitchen, Cook was busy doing what she did best—cooking. The older woman could tell from Katey’s expression that the conversation with Caleb had not gone well, though she didn’t look like she’d been crying quite as hard this time. She stopped her mincing long enough to embrace the girl, saying, “Now, there, there child. It will be alright. He’s a good man, you’ll see. He really is.” Katey had nodded. She thought he was, too, she had just met him in a period of his life when he felt out-of-control and overwhelmed by the responsibility of being in power. Katey could relate and she was hopeful that, someday soon, Matthew would be back where he belonged and she could reveal her true identity to Caleb and start their relationship all over again.

  Today, however, was not that day.

  It was an accident. It happened in the blink of an eye and it was no one’s fault. Cook crossed back over to the counter by the stew pot where she had been mincing meat. As she proceeded she said nonchalantly over her shoulder, “Rose, dear, could you hand me that pot.” Just as the words left her mouth, she realized her mistake and began to add, “It’s very hot.”

  But it was too late. Katey had touched the pot with her bear hand. Pulling her hand back, she began to scream in agony. She looked down at her fingers to see blisters forming and the skin beginning to sloth off. She squeezed them in reeling in pain, tears pouring from her eyes. She was actually gulping for air, wheezing and leaning back against the counter trying to steady herself.

  Cook’s immediate reaction was to get her salve. She kept it in the cupboard near the fireplace. Katey was vaguely aware that Cook was praying or cussing or both as she hurried to render aid. But she was not the first person to reach Katey. Despite her throbbing fingers, Katey heard Caleb enter the room before she saw him. Even through the veil of tears that impaired her vision, she could see that he was infuriated.

  He grabbed her by the shoulders and forced her to look up at him, “So, you can’t make a single, solitary sound then?” he demanded. She struggled against him, trying to free herself from his grip and get to Cook, not just because she felt she would be protected there but because she was in desperate need of that salve. “How dare you lie to me!” he continued, holding her in place and pressing her up against the counter. She was shaking her head, no, trying to make him understand that she wasn’t lying, that she had no idea how she had done it, but he was not willing to listen to anyone at th
at moment, including Cook.

  Cook was trying to wedge her way between them, pleading with Caleb to release the poor girl, he was acting like a tyrant. But when he turned and looked at her with those icy eyes, even Cook flinched. “Stay out of this!” he commanded. He still had Katey by the arm and now he began to drag her out of the room and down the hallway. He could hear Cook behind him yelling his name but he had completely lost all self-control. He absolutely did not trust this woman now, she who had told him that she could not speak, that she knew nothing of Matthew’s whereabouts and then, just a few minutes later, let out the most bone-chilling scream he had ever heard.

  Katey was silently gasping for air. The pain from her finger and her arms, particularly where Caleb had ahold of her, was almost unbearable. He also had a large amount of her hair in his fist, which pulled her head back at a sharp angle and made it even more difficult to breath. She was terrified of where they might be going and equally as panicked over what he might do to her once they reached their destination.

  Caleb’s anger had not lessoned by the time he reached the stairs leading to the dungeon. She was fighting him trying to free herself from his grip. His patience had run out long ago and, so to ensure she could not get away, he looped his arm around her waste and dragged her down the stone stairwell. She continued to struggle, kicking and flailing, but he was much too strong for her, especially in her injured state and he was easily able to get her down the stairwell.

  “Open the gate!” he yelled at the snarly little guard who stepped out from the shadows as he approached. He followed orders immediately, shocked at the sight. Caleb sat her back down and dragged her the rest of the way into the cell. He pushed her up against the wall with one hand as he reached for the shackles with the other. By now, Katey had stopped resisting. She was out of breath, out of strength, panic-stricken.