Fallen Angel From Revenge to Redemption

by Deborah R. Brandon

  I closed my eyes really tight and decided to seduce him. I started to run my hands up and down his back. I could feel him starting to relax. I leaned down and a placed a soft kiss on his lips. He kissed me back and wasn’t afraid to show me the passion and hungry for me that he had. He ran his hands in light circles across my back and pressed me closer.

  “Baby, I don’t have it in me to stop tonight if we keep going,” he said breaking the kiss.

  I touched one finger to his face, so I could turn it towards mine and said, “Well don’t.”

  Darren let out a pent up breathe and asked me if I was sure. I nodded my head yes.

  The rest of the night was filled with passionate kisses and lingering touches. I don’t think there was an inch of my body that his mouth hadn’t been on. It was more than just sex. For the first time in my life someone had made love to me.

    ~Shanice~

  You are an overcomer…

  It has been a week since the tragic incident with Alyssa and Omar and their mother Isabelle. They had all been moved into regular rooms and their physical wounds were healing nicely but it would be a while before the mental and emotional scars would heal. Mrs. Sanchez had been there every day and only left to get a shower and change clothes.

  Isabelle’s husband Aiden’s body had been claimed by his biological family once the medical examiner had finished with it. They were trying their best to make things even more difficult for Isabelle. Even with the abuse, I knew she would have wanted to be part of the funeral arrangements and be able to attend the service. Even though they were legally married, due to the situation, his family was bulldozing her and she was allowing it.

  Isabelle had admitted that she hated who Aiden had become, but she remembered a time when she had loved him with all of her heart. She had come to terms with everything and she just wanted to get well and be able to take care of her kids. She only wished that she had left sooner and maybe none of this would have happened.

  The police officer had been released and was recovering nicely as well. I smiled to myself as I updated another patient’s charts. Today was my early day. I was going to leave here and have lunch with Darren before heading to the Help Center.

  ~Darren~

  If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere. -Frank A. Clark

  I enjoyed an earlier lunch with Shanice. Every time I was with her she had me on cloud nine and climbing.

  I have another counseling section with Mr. G. today. Mr. G. was cool but very perspective as well, you couldn’t get anything past him. He was helping me deal with some of the demons from my past as well as dealing with killing someone. I am not having any PTSD that I am aware of.

  My thoughts kept going back to Shanice. She wasn’t the kind of young lady that you played around with. She was wife material. She is beautiful inside and out. She had had a couple of nightmares after the incident with Omar and Alyssa. She was still beating herself up about it.

  I arrived at the police station and talked shop with the team for a little bit. Everyone took turns telling tells from the world’s dumbest criminals file. I laughed at their stories and let them know that I would be back on the beat with them if I could convince Mr. G. that I had all of my marbles. I also told them about my date and of course they ragged on me. I looked down at my watch and realized that it was five minutes before my meeting, so I excused myself promising to catch up with them later.

  I walked down the hall, and tapped on the door to Mr. G’s office.

  “Come in,” he advised.

  “Good afternoon, Mr. G., how are you?” I asked as I shook his hand and walked over to the sofa and took a seat.

  “Let’s jump straight into Darren; do you think that you are ready to go back to work?” Mr. G. asked.

  “Yes,” I answered without hesitation.

  Mr. G. shook his head to acknowledgement.

  “How are you sleeping?” he asked.

  “I am sleeping fine and without any medication. No reoccurring dreams, no guilt. It was a righteous kill. One officer was already down. His family had already been harmed by him, and time was of the essence. I had a clear shot and I took it,” I said sincerely feeling no regret.

  “Did your actions have anything to do with your past? Is that the reason you have no regret?” Mr. G. asked.

  I let out a deep sigh, so that I could keep my temper in check.

  “I don’t think information retrieved from my psych files should be used against me,” I said looking Mr. G. straight in the eye.

  “I agree, Mr. G. said. Yet, his family is filing a wrongful death suit against you. You better believe that they will pull out all the stops to paint you in a negative light. Not just you, all of us. During this day and age, with all the police killings going on, it won’t be hard for them to find a sympathetic ear as well as a jury that will convict you and use you to make an example out of. We have to get our ducks in a row.”

  “What in the world,” I said as I cradled my hands in front of my face in utter stock. In an instant, my life flashed before my eyes. I thought about my son and the case I was building to get custody, my career path tanked, no future and no hope. The wind had been taken out of my sails.

  The department is putting you on an administrative leave without pay pending the outcome of the case. The department’s legal counselor that has been assigned to your case is a Diana Wells. She has an impeccable record. She has already released a statement on our behalf, as well as yours to the press. The department is behind you one hundred percent.

  I stood up and looked at my badge and as well as my service pistol before handing them over. I gathered my things and walked out of Mr. G’s office in a daze. It was obvious that the news had gotten around the department. I didn’t stop to speak to anyone.

  I went by my mom’s place before going to my apartment and explained the situation to her. I told my brothers to watch over mom and our sisters because I was getting out of town for a little while. I was going up to the cabin in the mountains to clear my head.

  ~Sam~

  When it rains, it pours…

  I left the police station as soon as my shift was over. The air in there was thick. A dark cloud was hanging over everyone with the news of Darren being sued for a wrongful death. Situations like this make it hard to do your job without second guessing yourself.

  I threw my things into the bed of my truck and hopped in. I called Domonique and cancelled our plans for the evening. I explained the situation to her regarding Darren. She gave me her blessing to go out there and take care of my friend.

  I knew Darren like the back of my hand. He was the brother I never had. He always drove to his cabin in the mountains whenever life threw him lemons. He would build something, tear something up or drink a few beers. I went buy a little country store to get a few cold ones for us just in case, he was out.

  Damien and the others had offered to come with me but I preferred to handle this solo. Pretty soon I was on the highway and alone in my thoughts. The only thing that I could think of was how messed up this situation was.

  This situation was wrong on so many levels. Darren is a good cop, not just a good cop but a good person. Situations like this can break a person. Change them from people with a passion, from a person who wants to make a difference in the community to someone who is just on the beat waiting to retire.

  Understandably Aiden’s mother and father are grieving right now and this senseless lawsuit was their way of honoring their son I guess. Where were they when he was beating and abusing his family? Why didn’t they get him some help earlier? That’s what I wanted to know. People are a trip.

  I arrived at the log cabin after driving for two hours. Darren was sitting on the outside in the porch swing. He was staring off in space. He was sweaty and exhausted. I grabbed the beer from the cooler and started to walk up the steps.

  “I come bearing gifts,” I said as I handed him an ice cold beer.

  “Thanks man,
you didn’t have to drive all the way out here,” he said as he opened the can and took a long drink from the can.

  “Yeah, I did. Life has kicked you in the stomach and knocked the wind out of you. It is my job to help you catch your breath,” I responded sincerely.

  “Appreciate it,” he said.

  “You are intending to fight this aren’t you?” I asked as I opened a can of beer for myself.

  “I have no choice but just not today. Today we drink. Tomorrow we fight,” he said looking defeated.

  I took a seat beside my friend and raised my glass to his, to salute him before taking a drink.

  ~Darren~

  Friendship needs no words…

  Sam and I drank a few more beers. I put some charcoal on the grill. I grilled some chicken, smoked sausage, and a few pork chops. I wasn’t planning on going home until Sunday night. I would face the music then. As the meat cooked I walked into the kitchen and opened a can of baked beans and poured the contents into a long glass pan. I put a little bit of barbeque sauce in them and then placed strips of bacon across the top of it and placed it in the oven. I also boiled a couple ears of corn and made a seafood pasta salad.

  When that was done I checked on the bigger pieces of meat and handed the grilling over to Sam before I ran back inside to take a shower.

  Sam was a good friend. He wasn’t talking things to death. He was just letting me be. That was just what I needed. I felt bad because I haven’t spoken with Shanice seen I got the news. Right now in this moment, I was not myself and I didn’t want to show her that side of me.

  Sam and I ate the food I had prepared and put the leftovers up. We watched the movie Divergent and then called it a night. I had only been in the bed for a little while when I heard a car pull into the driveway.

  I closed my eyes tight fearing that reports had found out where I was hiding. No not hiding, just taking a break from the real world. I heard multiple voices. I climbed out of bed and pulled my shirt over my head. I walked to the door ready to go in on someone.

  When I yanked opened the door and turned on the porch light, I was shocked to find Shanice, Dominique, Vanessa, Lamar, Maribel, and my brother Mario.

  ~Shanice~

  Be strong because things will get better. It may be stormy now but it never rains forever.-Unknown

  “Do not be mad at them. I spoke with your mom and she told me were you were. I didn’t want to travel by myself and your mom made your brother come with me. While I was packing, the rest of them came over and the next thing I know Lamar was yelling road trip and we are here now. We saw everything on the news, as well as Sam told Domonique what was going on. I have been trying to call you and I am going straight to voicemail. I just had to know for myself that you were okay? If you don’t want us to stay, then we will leave,” I finished.

  Lamar said, “In the morning, I am not getting back on the road tonight. If you want us to leave then we will in the morning, so step aside and let us in.”

  Darren moved to the side and allowed everyone to enter. He took my things from my hands. I followed him to his room.

  Once we were in the room, I wrapped my hands around his thick athletic body. A wave of relief had washed over my body when I finally had laid eyes on him. When I saw him some of the anger had left me. He was beat down by life the last thing he needed was for his woman to be giving him hell as well.

  He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight, like he was borrowing my strength.

  “I was worried about you,” I said looking up and meeting his cognac colored eyes.

  “I am sorry that I worried you needlessly. I just needed to clear my head,” he responded, dropping his hands to his side.

  “I know. I hope that you know that you are not alone in this unless you want to be. I care about you, Darren.”

  “I care about you too. I can’t even get my head wrapped around this. My career is on hold. I do have some money set aside for rainy days, so I can pay my bills. All of my dirty laundry is being aired for everyone to see including my child’s mother. This situation has the ability to kill every dream that I have ever dreamed,” Darren said as he paced around the room like a caged animal.

  “Darren, you can’t change who your father was. In regards, to your career, yes, this could make you or break you. I still believe that what was designed to break you will make you stronger and better. In regards to your dirty laundry 8 Mile it.

  “What do you mean 8 Mile it?” Darren interrupted me.

  “Like Eminem in 8 Mile, if you step out there and talk about your dirty laundry yourself, then it takes away all their power when they try to use it against you. It becomes old news. When you win the case then even your child’s mother can’t say a word. The way you carry yourself during this situation might actually propel you forward into your true destiny,” I finished letting what I said sink in. Darren believed in God and he knew for himself that all God’s promises are yes and amen.

  ~Darren~

  When it rains look for rainbows, when it is dark look for stars.-Unknown

  “Baby, you are right,” I said feeling some relief for the first time.

  My girl was standing on the promises and she was encouraging me to do the same. There is nothing like a praying woman.

  “Another thing you could do is bring up his record. Tell his story. Who was Aiden? How many times had police been called to that address for criminal domestic violence situations? Was there a restraining order in place and was he violating it by being there? Had his family tried to get him help previously for anger management? You know what I mean?” she asked looking at me with those big huge brown eyes.

  “Yes, I know what you mean. You could have been a lawyer in a former life or a PR agent,” I said teasingly.

  She was worried about me and wanted to help me to get out of the situation. I just wanted her to relax and not worry so much. Yet, I couldn’t tell her everything was going to be okay because I wasn’t sure of that myself. She needed to take it down a notch before she made herself sick with worry.

  “Have you eaten?” I asked

  “No, I was just trying to get here to you. I just had to be here with you, for you,” she replied.

  “Thank you, baby. Go take a shower and I will warm you up a plate and have it ready for you when you come out,” I said trying to take care of her.

  The rest of the night we just talked and laughed. I fixed her a plate and she ate. To our surprise we fall asleep as soon as our heads hit the pillow.

  ***

  Everyone stayed put for the rest of the weekend. We went fishing, drank beer from the cooler, and watched movies. We cooked on the grill, turned the radio up loud, played volleyball, and basically talked a lot of junk. Most everyone respected the fact that I didn’t want to talk about the courthouse. Lamar brought it up one time and that was to say that I should fight fire with fire. I should sue them for deformation of my character, slander, loss wages, and pain and suffering. We all had a good laugh at Lamar’s expense. He was a good guy even though he was a little over the top. No one could say that he didn’t keep it real.

  Sam and Domonique were enjoying their relationship. They looked like teenagers in love. Lamar and Maribel were getting super close; he was playing with a little fire himself. Mario kept trying to flirt with Vanessa but she would not give him even a little bit of play.

  As for me, I know that I am in love with Shanice but she wasn’t ready to hear that. She cared for me and that was enough for now. The fact that she was here, offering support and throwing out good ideas to help spoke more than any words that she could have spoken aloud.

  I probably have loved Shanice since my eyes caught hers from across the dance floor. The lights changed the color of her highlights as she danced back and forth to the rhythm of the music. There was so much positive energy wrapped around her. Everything was so light and carefree. Now they were heavy. She was doing everything that I needed her to do by just being here.

  I am a man, I can h
andle my own. Yet, it is nice not to have to travel this road alone.

  ~Shanice~

  4 months later

  When everything feels like an uphill struggle just think of the view from the top. -Unknown

  I am sitting in a coffee house across from the county courthouse, waiting on Vanessa, Domonique and Lamar to arrive. It is a registered historical landmark. Yet, its beauty is lost on me. Our lives have been turned upside down on this witch hunt but we have stayed strong through the whole experience. Please don’t get me wrong, we have had our moments.

  Darren has done his part to try to make the best of a bad situation. He has worked odd jobs for people in the community. He volunteered more at The Help Center. He worked with a lot of boys from the Boys and Girls club. We had eaten dinner with both his family and mine.

  On the downside his child’s mother did use this situation as a means to keep him from his son. This almost broke Darren. It was hard sitting beside him and not having the means to help him or comfort him. I did the only thing that I knew to do, which was pray for God to right this wrongs. If it wasn’t for my belief in a Higher Power, I would have gone crazy.

  Darren decided to wait until all the court stuff was settled before going to court to get visitation and custody settled.

  I had met Manny a couple of times before this mess. He was a kind and sweet little guy. He loves his daddy. I didn’t know that I could love someone’s child as much as I love Manny, but I do. I thought that it would be hard seeing as I wouldn’t be able to have any of my own. Surprisingly, loving Manny came to me easy.

  My crew arrived and we quickly placed our order. The waitress left and we began to talk immediately.

  “How are you holding up?” Lamar asked showing his concern.

  “I am good,” I replied looking up to meet his eyes.

  “Lair,” he said as he leaned in and rubbed my back as a show of support and comfort.