The Weirdest Noob

by Arthur Stone

  “A flask isn’t a pickaxe. The clan only provides tools and clothing, so you can get stuffed.”

  “But Pup said you could also pay off for a flask in ore.”

  “Why don’t you get your flask from Pup, then, if he’s so clever?”

  Ros spat the greedy bastard right in the face mentally, and headed toward the crater.

  * * *

  The next rat behaved just like the previous one—it ran off as soon as Ros got close. He decided against chasing it, assuming it would end just like his first acquaintance with the rodents. He threw a lump of ore at the beast instead. He missed, but the rat didn’t run away as fast as its paws could take it. Instead, it approached the rock that fell onto the ground and started to sniff it.

  Ros managed to hit its paw with his second throw. A system message told him that he dealt two points of damage to the rat. The rat shrieked, spun like a mad top, and rushed toward its foe. Ros had intended for something like this to happen, but he was hardly overjoyed by the fact that his plan worked. Even a single beast was cause enough for unease—he was extremely reluctant about experiencing pain again.

  He intercepted the rat with a crushing downward blow, so hard he had to go down on one knee. Alas, instead of hitting its neck the way he had intended, he struck the rodent further down its back, a little to the left. The beast sure was quick to dodge the menace.

  There was a spray of some dark liquid, some screeching, a flash of pain in the bitten ankle, and then another blow, followed by another. The jaws released their viselike grip on his leg. The rat fell down in its death throes with its paws convulsing.

  “You hit the Mine Rat for 8 damage. You kill the Mine Rat. XP received: 10. Points left until the next level: 83. Achievement earned: First Kill. Achievement bonus: 1 unassigned primary stat point. Achievement unlocked: Rat Scourge. Kill 1000 rats to complete the achievement. Reward: random.”

  Well, well, well—killing mobs was turning out to be highly beneficial. Even his first death had boosted his health from 28 hit points to 33, and now he would raise his Strength by a whole point. Incidentally, it had also grown from 9 to 9.01. Pup had been perfectly right: combat made stats increase faster.

  The pesky rat left him with 19 hit points remaining out of his 33, so his victory had come at the price of blood. Ros decided against the risks associated with hunting more rats before recovering his HP. Instead, he went to the nearest gallery so as to waste no time, found a promising ore vein, and started hacking away at the rock. But then he stopped nearly as soon as he’d started, and ran back, cursing as he went.

  The rat carcass was still there. Ros touched it with his finger, swallowing down his revulsion. What he saw was similar to the way the contents of his bag were displayed—a field divided into squares, with the first four on the top left filled with items of some sort. Rat Pelt. Rat Claws. Rat Tail. Rat Fangs. They didn’t look like treasure of high value, but Ros decided to collect everything just the same, and then went back to the monotony of a miner’s labor.

  He used up his Vigor before his health made a full recovery. But then, as he was resting, he realized that his hit points regenerated faster that way.

  Another thing he noticed was that the holes left on his pants by the teeth of the rodents had grown smaller, though their Durability fell by a single point—he had a good memory for numbers.

  He’d spend all his profits on clothes this way…

  He heard a rumble and turned around, seeing another rat. The beast dared not approach, and seemed to have been looking for something among the fungi growing in the cave. Ros observed the mob absent-mindedly, examining the game interface in hopes of finding something useful or at least learning to handle his character better.

  “Passive Skills”—now what would those be? Plus ten percent to magic and ranged weapon damage. Hardly very useful at this point. “Gift to the Race’s Last Scion.” His levels were frozen, so that was of no use. Nevertheless, his XP points kept accumulating for some reason: one for every piece of ore, and a whopping ten for the rat. What would happen once he got the remaining eighty-three? He had no idea.

  “Active Skills.” He had two of those: Soul Trap and Reviving the Trapped Soul of the Long Dead. The former required twenty magic energy points, and the latter—thirty. He only had twenty-one at his disposal, which ruled out exactly one half of his active skills.

  Now, what was he supposed to do with the one he could use—Soul Trap?

  Ros tried tapping it mentally, like the line with the auxiliary stats, which was still empty. No effect at all. He stared at the rat, which was still sniffing something out, and tried again. The crystal icon blinked, and the blue magic energy bar became almost empty. This was followed by an enraged shriek. The rodent that he kept staring at finally left the mushrooms alone and started running toward him with obviously hostile intentions.

  He didn’t manage to jump up in time, so he intercepted the foe with a sideways strike from a sitting position. This threw the mob off course, and it dashed just past Ros, slapping him with its scaly tail. He struck at it once more, this time from the back. “You hit the Mine Rat for 6 damage. Critical hit: broken paw.”

  The rat was much slower to maneuver now, clearly favoring the wounded paw. Ros jumped away, getting out of the range of the head that snapped its sharp fangs at him, and struck from afar, using the whole length of his arm and the weapon, and making the blow fast as well as strong. This might be a game, but one shouldn’t forget his real world skills, which seemed to come in handy even here.

  Another blow. The last one. A line drawn under his second battle.

  “You kill the Mine Rat. XP received: 10. Points left until the next level: 73. Achievement earned: Clear Kill. You have defeated your opponent without taking any damage. Achievement bonus: 1 Resilience point. Bonus effect: permanent. Achievement unlocked: Impervious. Kill 2000 monsters of your level or higher without taking any damage to complete the achievement. Bonus reward: random.”

  Even though Ros had no idea what Resilience was used for, it still seemed like good news. Apart from earning a bunch of bonuses, he discovered an excellent method of attracting the rats’ attention. He wouldn’t need to creep up and throw ore at them. He could just cast Soul Trap, and they would run toward him of their own accord, rage clouding their judgment.

  The downside was that the skill used up virtually all of his magic energy, and it took about as much time to restore as health.

  Strangely enough, the rat turned out to have no pelt, even though Ros could clearly see it. There was, however, something new among the claws and fangs: “Soul Crystal. Trapped Creature: Mine Rat.”

  Obviously enough, Ros collected everything, and then went back to mining while waiting for his magic energy to replenish. Once there were nineteen points on the blue bar, he set forth to hunt new quarry, hoping for the remaining ones to restore en route.

  His estimations were correct. He killed another rat, losing a third of his health in battle. This was followed by more hard mining work, some rest, and more labor. Then he resumed his hunt. Another rat at the intersection of the main tunnel with one of the galleries; he cast Soul Trap yet again, and the enraged beast rushed toward him—followed by four more quickly-moving rodents. He felt pain. Then it got dark. As before, this was followed by a bright light and Greedie’s most unpleasant grin.

  “The Mine Rat kills you. You are resurrected at your current respawn point: miner settlement next to the Ravenas mine, Rallia Province. The current owner is the Sword Power guild. Attention: this is a dangerous zone. There is high likelihood of aggressive actions from monsters and players. It is not recommended to place your bind points in dangerous zones.”

  “Haven’t seen you in a while—I almost started to miss you,” said the dwarf with contrived warmth.

  “Greedie, I have a few rat pelts, some claws and fangs, and a skull. Is there any way we could arrange something about the pickaxe and the flask?”

  “Do I look like a vendor to yo
u?”

  “No, but you were saying—”

  “I told you to work and not knock stinking entrails out of rats.”

  “I need a flask and a pickaxe. You’re my only chance of getting them, and you know it. So let’s come to some sort of an arrangement.”

  “You’re some noob! If you at least had one or two hundred of them, there’d be some sense in it for me. The way it is, there is none. The smaller stuff and other garbage is only interesting when there’s a lot of it. As for me, I don’t care for it at all.”

  “Who would be interested in rat remains, then?” asked Ros, wishing to take advantage of the dwarf’s suddenly talkative mood.

  “Anyone but me.”

  “But you’ll take them in larger amounts?”

  “Only if I’m in a good mood. This stuff is used for leveling up Alchemy at low levels. Leatherworkers can level up on pelts, too—the zeroes, that is. So, it’s possible to sell them in the city.”

  “What about Soul Crystals? Are you interested in those?”

  “Are you a necro or something?”

  “A what?”

  “A Necromancer. They have a skill like that—it raises the chance of Soul Crystal drops. But what are the chances of a worker like you being a necro? You must have gotten the crystal by accident. The chance is infinitesimal, but it does exist. Or do you have Necromancer skills? What race are you?”

  “A rare one.”

  “I sure can see that you’re a rare freak. So you must possess some skill like the Necromancers and the rest of them who deal with corpses. A level zero character will not be able to see such a crystal or take it. You can only receive one if you trade with a necro.”

  “So will you take it?”

  “One off a rat is next to useless. Now, did you come here to work or to chat? Get out of my sight already.”

  * * *

  Ros found himself at the respawn point once again a few hours later. This time he hadn’t touched anyone at all, but was standing there mining peacefully after another kill when suddenly three rats attacked him from behind. Could they have come to avenge their fallen kin?

  “You’re a hard-headed fool,” Greedie shook his head. “I’ve never seen noobs as stupid as you.”

  “Instead of making fun of me, you could give me a flask and a pickaxe.”

  “A hard-headed one indeed. Well, you know what… I will oblige. I’m in a good mood today. We’ll deduct the price of the pickaxe later, and you’ll owe me two hundred pelts for the flask.”

  “Twenty.”

  “Getting cheeky, are we? Not a good idea.”

  “Come on, it’s hardly worth a dozen.”

  “A fat lot you know about prices. Fifty pelts, or find yourself another shop.”

  “All right, agreed. Do you have any better clothes? Mine get worn through too quickly.”

  “You need armor instead of clothes, since you screw around instead of engaging in honest labor.”

  “Do you have any armor?”

  “Listen, noob, what we have here is a mine, and not a castle under siege. Once there’s nothing left of your clothes, we’ll give you some new ones, but that will be deducted, too. You have a piece-rate contract, so you’ll owe us if you don’t manage to get enough ore for food and so on. Which means you’ll stay in the mines until your debt is paid off. Got it?”

  “Sure, sure. So, about that pickaxe and that flask…”

  “What’s your Mining & Quarrying at?”

  “It hasn’t been unlocked yet.”

  “So it’s zero. A decent pickaxe won’t do you any good—the chance of getting a lump of ore will decrease, and you’ll get nothing every other time. I’ll give you a plain pickaxe. There’ll be a penalty due to zero-level Mining & Quarrying—not too big, but still. So I advise you to level it as soon as you can. It shouldn’t take you more than a couple of hours—in fact, you could have done it a long time ago if you weren’t such a doofus.”

  * * *

  The new tool made things happen faster during mining, as well as hunting. Having killed two more rats and harvested three lumps of ore, Ros received the message: “Congratulations! Auxiliary stat unlocked: Mining & Quarrying. Achievement earned: First Auxiliary Stat. Achievement bonus: 1 Intellect point. Bonus effect: permanent. Achievement Unlocked: Start to Know Thyself. Unlock 10 auxiliary stats to complete the achievement. Reward: random.”

  A pity it wasn’t his Strength that got a bonus point, but this was fine, too. Every point of Intellect gave his character an extra eleven points of magic energy. According to the stat description, higher Intellect would also let him regenerate magic energy faster. This meant he could use Soul Trap more often, which would make it easier to hunt—thus far he would still occasionally had to throw rocks or lumps of ore. Doing so was supposed to level up his Accuracy, but Ros didn’t see any urgent need for that just yet.

  Still, everything needed to be leveled up. He had overheard two orcs talking by the mining cart earlier. One was telling the other you should wash more often to level up Attractiveness. He had no idea what it might be useful for, but everything appeared to have some use or other. Also, Ros wasn’t hugely fond of being filthy.

  From the ore to the rats, back to the ore, and then back to the rats. The cycle was growing slightly shorter, and the water he drank once an hour helped a little with the constant shortage of Vigor. Ros barely got into his next mining session when a tap brought him two lumps of ore instead of one. A pleasant bonus.

  The next message he received as he put the ore away in his bag was rather unpleasant: “Attention! You are slightly overloaded! Your character’s Speed is reduced by one point. Your character’s Agility is reduced by one point. The negative effect will last until the carried load is reduced. If the carried load is increased, the negative effects will increase accordingly.”

  Bother! He couldn’t submit his ore, either, since he’d have to wait for the evening registration or whatever it was. Then again, evening should have come a long time ago—also, he was actually weary, and not the way the game made him tired. It would be great to lie down, steam a bit in the sauna, or at least to take a dip in the creek.

  There was a flash of red behind him, and darkness covered everything.

  “Mine Demon of Mischief hits you for 89 damage. The Mine Demon of Mischief kills you. You are resurrected at your current respawn point: miner settlement next to the Ravenas mine, Rallia Province. The current owner is the Sword Power guild. Attention: this is a dangerous zone. There is high likelihood of aggressive actions from monsters and players. It is not recommended to place your bind points in dangerous zones.”

  Would you look at that! Killed in a single hit! The damage sustained by Ros was nearly three times higher than his total health. Hey, at least the death was quick and painless.

  It was way past sunset, and the settlement was shrouded in darkness. The only light came from a fire next to the gate and the dim torch hanging above Greedie sitting in his favorite spot. Ros discovered a few dwarves next to him at the respawn point. They looked strange, staring into nothingness with glassy eyes.

  “You wouldn’t happen to be a masochist, would you?” asked Greedie.

  “No, I’m actually a sadist in disguise.”

  “Would you believe it? The noob cracks jokes, too…”

  “What happened to these guys?” Ros pointed at the dwarves.

  “They logged off and left their characters in the mine.”

  “What happens then?”

  “Our mine is pretty tricky. The first galleries are safe—there are no mobs there. But that’s only true during the day. After dusk all kinds of things crawl out of the depths. Some of the guests are so tough we can’t handle them if we rush them all together. So you can leave your body in the galleries, but don’t be surprised if you find yourself at the respawn point come morning. Then again, you should be used to it.”

  “Can I submit my ore harvest?”

  “Wait until the morning—all the carts ha
ve been rolled out and left standing.”

  “Is the sauna working?”

  “Where would it go? It’s long empty, though.”

  “What about some food?”

  “You should come up earlier, wise guy—it’s way past supper. Go check if there’s anything left in the pot.”

  * * *

  The gunk he found in the pot was most unappetizing and looked as though it had already been digested once. Alas, he was ravenous, and also seeing system messages that warned him of substantial stat penalties if his character’s hunger increased, followed by the loss of hit points.

  So, he had no choice but to stuff his face and try to keep it down.

  The water he found at the sauna was lukewarm, which Ros hardly found surprising. What did surprise him was that the miner huts stood empty. There were only a handful of people sleeping on the wooden bunks, even though each hut could accommodate up to around twenty. Most miners appeared to be leaving their characters underground, despite the risk.

  On the other hand, what real risk was there? It wasn’t like they could lose anything. They were just saving the time it took to get back.

  The supper, albeit rather revolting, coupled with the bracing wash, managed to lift some of his fatigue. Instead of falling on his bunk, Ros took a seat on the porch so as to reflect on the day’s progress in peace. Mining & Quarrying pleased him the most—having unlocked the stat after reaching one point, he got it to grow by an additional 1.25 percent. Aside from that, things looked a lot less inspiring. Despite his tireless hunting and mining, he’d only managed to have his Strength grow by 0.11. Leveling that stat up to compensate for his stat point distribution blunder would sure take a while, possibly even longer than he imagined. Agility hadn’t grown at all since the value was already quite high, so it would take a lot to increase it.

  Strangely enough, his Intellect had grown by 0.12, and his Mental Power by 0.01. Both stats were associated with magic skills, so their progress must have been the result of his frequent use of the Soul Trap skill.

  Incidentally, now that he had 33 magic energy points, he could use his other magic skill— Reviving the Trapped Soul of the Long Dead. But what would he use as his target?