Lady J

by L. Divine

  “Who says they’ll be ungrateful?” I’m glad Netta’s here to fight my battles for me. I can’t see how my mom didn’t like her when she was growing up. I don’t know what I’d do without her and our Tuesdays at the shop. It’s like she says everything I want to say to Mama but can’t because she’s my elder. And I’ve learned not to question her too much if I want to keep all of my teeth. But Netta’s her homegirl and equal, making it an even playing field.

  “Experience, that’s who. And you know better than anyone how evil ungrateful people can be, especially when they don’t understand how we work.” Looking from me to Mama, Netta notices how quiet I am, calling Mama’s attention to it as well. I can’t hide anything from them for too long, but I’m not ready to tell them about this morning’s adventures at Misty’s.

  “Jayd, why are you so quiet? Everything okay?” Netta asks, walking Mama over to her station to blow-dry her hair. I think Mama’s going for cornrows today. She’s been complaining about her head itching in her French roll all week and, like me, braids are her alternate style.

  “Yes, everything’s fine. Just worried about Misty, that’s all,” I say without completely blowing my cover, or so I think. Mama’s eyes tell me she knows I’m up to something; even if she doesn’t know what it is yet.

  “That girl needs all the help she can get, especially now,” Netta says. I think she can feel me plotting too, and wants to come to my defense. Mama, on the other hand, isn’t so sympathetic. Netta drapes Mama with a pretty pink-and-yellow hair cape before sitting on her stool, ready to work Mama’s do. I love to watch Netta make magic on Mama’s head. I wonder if she wants an apprentice. I would love to work here.

  “Rule number one Jayd, you must have your clients’ permission before you can do any work on their behalf. To do otherwise is being dishonest and that’s not how we do it in our house,” she shouts over the loud blow-dryer Netta’s combing though her shoulder-length hair. “That’s why I asked the cats’ permission to use their sight. I respect individuals’ souls, girl, even animals’,” Mama says, lowering her chin to allow Netta to dry the back of her head.

  “How did you ask the cats, Mama?” I say from my seat in the adjacent station. I don’t understand why Netta has two stations when she’s the only stylist in the shop. She has the same steady clientele—no walk-ins allowed, unlike the other shops around here that’ll take anyone off the street. Doing hair up in here means more than the average press and curl. When a client leaves Netta’s shop, she leaves with a flyy hairstyle and blessings, too.

  “I knew Esmeralda wouldn’t give me the time of day, so I went to the next best resource, her pets. When I made them breakfast, Jayd, that was my way of giving them an offering to request the use of their vision. First I offered them the milk, which had my special honey blend to sweeten them up.” I wonder if it’s the same honey she gave to Misty? If so, I hope its effect never wears off. School would be much nicer if Misty wouldn’t trip as often.

  “Your Mama’s good with that honey, chile,” Netta says, shutting the dryer off and brushing through Mama’s hair, ready to style it. “Nobody can sweeten a tongue like Queen Jade, a.k.a. Lynn Mae Williams.”

  “Then I gave them the cupcakes with a little something extra in them to help facilitate the exchange. You see, Jayd, I didn’t deceive or manipulate anyone. And Esmeralda can be as mad as she wants but I didn’t break any rules in what I did. The interaction was between me and her fur balls, not her—and it was mutually beneficial.”

  “But what if your target doesn’t have any pets?” Which is the case with Rah. I didn’t know Misty had adopted a cat. As a matter of fact, I remember her being allergic to animal fur. But maybe that’s changed over the years or perhaps it was just a stray looking for a place to rest.

  “There are many ways to influence a situation without directly hitting your target. That’s what your studies are for, Jayd. Don’t put the cart before the horse,” she says, dropping her old-school wisdom on me as Netta parts her scalp for braids. “What you need is one of Netta’s head cleansings, girl. You know better than to let these people mess with your emotions. You’ve got better things to do anyway.”

  “Oh Jayd, you’ll love it, girl,” Netta says, leaving Mama’s head to escort me over to the wash basin Mama just left. “I’ll finish your braids in a minute, Lynn Mae,” she says, too excited to get her hands in my head. “I haven’t touched your crown since you were about nine days old. Look at all of this hair,” she says, releasing my hair from the tight ponytail and rubbing her fingers across my scalp. Damn, her touch feels good.

  “Yes, at your naming ceremony,” Mama says, smiling as she recalls the event. I can remember a little bit of it, but it all comes flooding back as Netta runs the cool water over my hair. “Your mom had a fit when she found out I let Netta touch your head.”

  “Yeah, Lynn Marie hasn’t liked me too much ever since I caught her making out in the backhouse when she was fifteen years old and I told your grandmother on her,” Netta says, but I’m too relaxed to keep up with the conversation. This feels so good. I wish I could let people in my head all the time, but Mama says it’s a serious taboo for me. Only when she’s around and only people she trusts can touch my head.

  “Jayd, after Netta does this, you’re going to need to wear white for the next twenty-four hours,” Mama says, going into Netta’s closet and grabbing two long white cloths to wrap my head up in. I already feel much better. But I don’t know about wearing all white to school.

  “I’m going to stick out like a sore thumb if I come to school in nothing but white clothes.” It’s bad enough I don’t fit in already. If I go to school looking like I was just baptized, they’ll really have something to say.

  “You already stick out, Jayd. Don’t worry about what others think of you. Be proud of your lineage, girl, even if it means you have to stand up for yourself at school. Know that what’s in you is much stronger than anything that’s in the world.” And I know she’s right. I just hope Misty and Rah feel the same way and trust that I would never do anything to hurt them. I know Rah will always give me the benefit of the doubt, but Misty is another story.

  I see Misty coming at me with a torch, shouting “Witch, witch!” My jade bracelets fall off my arm to the ground, shattering my powers along with their fragile forms.

  “You don’t have the sight, child,” the evil woman’s voice says. “And you never will!”

  “Yes I do!” I shout at the veiled voice as I look down through my tears at the shattered bracelets Mama entrusted to me. Misty and her followers are on a serious witch hunt and I’m the only one standing accused, which means I should be running for my life.

  “Just admit it. Those pretty brown eyes are no good without your bracelets,” the voice hisses. “The legacy ends right here, right now. Give it up, Jayd, before you get hurt.”

  “My eyes are just as good as my mother’s and my grandmother’s, not to mention my ancestors,” I shout. But the longer I stand here fighting with this unseen voice, the closer Misty and haters get to burning my ass alive. I’ve already been scorched in one dream and this isn’t about to be round two.

  “She’s learning the hard way, but she’s still learning,” Mama’s voice says. She, like the other woman, is nowhere to be seen. “Move out of the way when you see fire coming toward you, Jayd. Otherwise, you will get burned.” I touch the scar on my arm, remembering the painful incident, and decide it’s time to face my fears.

  “Witch, witch,” Misty shouts louder, egging on the crowd. “Get her!” As the crowd comes toward me at full speed, I recognize some of the faces as my own friends. Mickey and Nellie are on the front line right beside Misty, ready to light me like a Christmas tree.

  “I knew you were weird, Jayd, but damn. I didn’t know you were a witch,” Mickey says, sucking on her Blow Pop while lighting a torch of her own.

  “Yeah, Jayd. That’s really something you need to tell folks. I mean, what would the people at my church think of
me if they knew I was hanging out with a witch,” Nellie says, putting her torch to Mickey’s to light it, too. Before I can run off, I’m trapped in place and suddenly tied to a makeshift stake, like so many gifted conjure women before me.

  “Mama, help!” I yell. But all I can hear are the chants of the angry crowd surrounding me. Before they can get the roast started, Rah runs up to the crowd carrying a water hose and puts out everyone’s torches, saving my ass.

  “I’m a survivor.” My phone rings, waking me from my nightmare just in the nick of time. When I fold back the comforter, I realize I’m dripping in a pool of sweat. My sheets are cold and my white T-shirt is clinging to my body. If Mama saw me like this she’d have a fit. I learned at an early age never to be too revealing in a house full of men, even if they’re related to you. And Mama will never let me forget it either. What’s Rah doing calling me so early? Something must be wrong.

  “Hello,” I say, out of breath. I feel like I just ran ten miles and I don’t run unless a dog’s chasing me.

  “Jayd, are you okay?” he says, sounding short of breath too. “I just had the weirdest dream about you.” Oh hell no. Not him too.

  “Yes, I’m fine,” I say, sitting up in bed and reaching over to the nightstand for my alarm clock. It would have rung in five minutes anyway. No need for it now because I’m wide awake. “What was your dream about?” I whisper into the phone as I creep out of my bed and grab my daily necessities. I don’t want to wake Mama up. I’ll tell her about this one later, after I get Rah’s side of the story too.

  “It was about you running from the law or some shit. It could’ve been about me, but I felt like you were the one in trouble.” Rah has never called me about a dream like this before. “Are you sure you’re okay?” He sounds very concerned and I think it’s about more than his dream.

  “What else is going on?” I ask, dashing through the cold hall and into the dark bathroom, closing the door behind me. I quickly plug the electric heater into the wall and sit on the toilet seat directly in front of it, waiting for the orange glow to appear and warm my damp body.

  “I think you may have been right about Trish,” he says, giving me the full confession. “She told her brother that I got another girl, and he’s not feeling his sister being unhappy, know what I mean?”

  “Yeah, I know,” I say, propping the phone against my shoulder and hugging myself to get more warmth. I hate cold mornings. “Well, I’ll be honest too,” I say, stretching my hands out to nearly touch the small heater with my fingertips. “I’ve been working on something to help you get away from Trish.” Unlike with Misty, I’m going to be honest in my approach with him. Rah’s my real friend and deserves to know the truth about my efforts.

  “Something like what, Jayd?” he says. I can tell from his tone that he’s already not feeling me. But he seems willing to listen and that’s a good start.

  “Well, you know Mama makes charms to help influence people’s destinies, right?” I say, realizing that I’m not making this sound very good. Now I see why Mama said we must have a client’s permission or request to do work on his or her behalf. If you don’t, the conversation starts off like this one.

  “Right. What does that have to do with me? I didn’t ask her for anything,” he says.

  “I know, baby. But I did some work on your behalf, or I was planning on it, that is, if you don’t mind. Do you mind?” I ask, sounding like the twelve-year-old girl he fell in love with.

  “Hell yeah I mind, Jayd,” he says, yelling into the phone. I didn’t think he’d be this upset. But he is and it’s all my fault. “What were you thinking?”

  “I was thinking I would try to help your ass get out of this mess with Trish. Forgive me for caring,” I say. Even if he is right, his attitude puts me on the defense.

  “I don’t mind you wanting to help, Jayd. What I mind is you doing some shit behind my back. And who gave you permission to wear your grandmother’s apron?” he says, referring to Mama’s crown as queen of the kitchen—special recipes included. “Does she know you’re going around putting spells on people and shit?”

  “You’re taking this a little too far, don’t you think?” I say. “You have a right to be mad, but don’t get crazy with it.”

  “Jayd, this is serious. I don’t want to start having dreams and getting headaches and shit like you do. That scares the hell out of me, girl, on the real,” he says. And for the first time, I get it. Rah accepts my spiritual lineage just as much as any outsider of the religion can. But he’s as afraid of it as anyone else, too.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” I say, eyeing my things sitting on the overfilled clothes hamper. It always smells like feet and ass in here. “I can’t stand to see people hurting, Rah, you included. If I can do something within my powers to help, I will. But you’re right. I should’ve never done it without your permission,” I say. His silence worries me, but I’m not hanging up until I know we’re okay. As my dream predicted, Rah is my one true ally in our circle who will always be there for me, no matter what. And I can’t afford to lose him now, even if that means having to deal with Trish in his life for a little while longer.

  “What were you going to do?” he says, sounding more curious than angry.

  “I was making you a gris-gris similar to the one hanging on my backpack with the word ‘listen’ written on the side.”

  “Are you sure you don’t have some dolls with pins sticking out of them or some shit like that?” Rah says, making light of our heritage. But it’s okay. I think he’ll learn to be more comfortable with it in time.

  “No, not this time. Just a little herb sack, if you will.” I hear the door to my grandfather’s room open and know I’ve woken someone up. I better get off this phone and get ready for school before that someone knocks on the door.

  “There’s never anything wrong with an herb sack,” he says, easing up a bit. I’m glad he wasn’t unappeasable on the subject. He must really trust me to forgive me so quickly for invading his privacy. “For real though, Jayd. Baby, I know you’ve got skills that the rest of us don’t have. And everyone knows that Mama is nice with her talents too,” he says. I love that he has so much affection for Mama. “But you can’t pull nothing like this again. I need to have a choice in the matter, always, understand?”

  “I hear you, Rah I hear you.” Before we hang up, I turn on the shower to let it run for a while. Sometimes it can take up to five minutes for the hot water to work. “So, do I have your permission?” I say, not giving up on my mission. What kind of queen in training would I be if I retreated at the first sign of trouble?

  “It can’t be too frightening if it’s herb bags, I guess,” he says, bending to my will. I guess that sweetness lesson is finally kicking in, too. “But I want to see you make it,” he says.

  “No problem. You know you’re the only friend of mine Mama will let in her backhouse.” She’s very finicky about who she lets into the spirit room, clients included. “I won’t make a move without your consent, I promise. Talk to you later.”

  “All right then. And Jayd, thanks for telling me the truth,” he says, hanging up on the conversation. I’m glad we got that out, but it still doesn’t explain why he had a dream about me running while I was having a similar one. That’ll be first on my agenda when I talk to Mama this afternoon. I still have to get through school first and I better go if I want to get there on time.

  “Jayd, get out of the bathroom. I hear you in there talking on the phone. I gotta go, now girl. Come on,” Jay says, interrupting my flow.

  “You’ll have to wait until I’m out of the shower,” I say, stepping into the steaming water and officially starting my day. There’s nothing like a nice hot shower to make me feel good first thing in the morning.

  “Whatever. I’ll go outside,” he says, going out into the cold morning to handle his business and leaving me to mine. I’m glad Rah and I were able to resolve our issue instead of letting it fester until it was out of control.
I’m also grateful he gave me permission to help him, although I hope there are no repercussions from making Misty’s bag without her knowledge. Even if there are, it’ll be worth it as long as she gets her mojo back. The gris-gris Netta gave me is sitting on the shrine until Mama finishes her work. I will pay closer attention to Misty today to see if I can tell any difference in her spirit.

  It was an unusually quiet bus ride this morning. Now that Misty seems to be back in her routine with KJ, she’s no longer on the bus, invading what I consider to be my space, especially when she’s at my stop in the morning. It’s enough having to see her at school all day. I don’t need to see her first thing in the morning.

  Instead of speeding up the hill to campus like I normally do every morning, I decide to take it slow and enjoy the view of nicely manicured lawns and dream about having a luxury car like the various ones parked in the driveways of the mini mansions I stroll by. What’s the rush? I don’t want to catch up on the gossip nor do I want to run into any of my friends. After last night’s dream and Rah’s call this morning, I’m in need of some serious me time.

  “Hey Jayd. Can I holla at you for a minute?” Jeremy says, pulling up next to me and ruining my silent vibe. “Get in.”

  “I’m flying solo this morning, Jeremy, but thank you for the offer,” I say, not changing my steady pace. My legs are used to the walk now and it’s not as much of a challenge for me anymore. It actually feels good, and I see the muscles building in my thighs. If I could afford it, I’d get a new skirt or two and show them off.

  “Come on,” he says, cruising alongside me while the other cars angrily pass him. “You’re stopping traffic, Lady J.”

  “No, you’re stopping traffic. I’m walking to school,” I say, not giving in to his charming smile. “Shouldn’t you be surfing or something?”