Riptide (Rock Stars, Surf and Second Chances Book 2)

by Michelle Mankin

  I tiptoed down the stairs. Ramon didn’t even notice me when I sat down on one of the steps. He had taken his shirt off. Clad only in his charcoal board shorts, I swooned inwardly. A shirtless guy with a guitar was sexy. Ramon holding his favorite one was an instant turn on. His head down, curls over his eyes, his fingers flowed over the ebony fretboard, coaxing music from it, a beautiful melody that I had never heard. Yet, it felt familiar. He created a mood with a chime effect on his foot petal and a picking pattern with a simple chord progression that was breathtaking in its execution. When he started singing, I came completely undone.

  I lost track of how many times he played the tune, making subtle adjustments to the lyrics or chords, scribbling on a steno pad he kept nearby. But eventually, my head grew heavy. I leaned it against the railing, rested my eyes and dreamed we were dancing together to that perfect melody.

  I woke some time later in his arms as he carried me up the stairs. I draped my arms around his neck, snuggled into his chest, closer to his warm body and his delicious scent. “I dreamed about you,” I confessed to him sleepily.

  “Oh yeah?” He raised that imperial brow.

  I had trouble focusing on it as sleep beckoned once more. “Uh-huh.” I yawned and closed my eyes. “But don’t worry. I’m not falling in love with you again.”

  Chapter Fifty-Three

  Karen

  No kisses in the night. No making love in the shower. No sexual demands of any sort. Subdued and thoughtful, Ramon let me sleep until the last minute.

  “Wake up, Karen.” He stroked my cheek with the softest brush of his fingers, calloused from years of playing.

  “Mmm.” I covered his hand with my own and pressed his palm into my skin. “Five more minutes, please.”

  “Babe, I’d let you, but you won’t have any time to surf if you don’t get up now.”

  I popped open my eyes to see his handsome face inches from mine, his half-clothed body bent over me. I wanted to touch more than just his face, but I had promised myself before watching him play all night that I wouldn’t fall for him. Deep down I knew it was already too late. The passion Franklin had spoken of described my feelings for Ramon. The heat of those emotions burned me from the inside out. Too bad for me the fire didn’t burn in him.

  Reluctantly, I released his hand, ducking my head under the pillow. “I don’t feel like going out today.”

  Silence followed. A long span of it. I thought he had left, but the bed suddenly dipped beside me. He pulled the pillow away. I blinked at him with strands of hair tangled in front of my eyes.

  “I gave you some space last night because I thought you needed it. But you can’t keep running away from your problems. You’re upset about your dad. I get that.” I glanced away. He captured my chin in his warm but gentle grip. “Don’t hide your feelings from me. Share them. Let me help if I can. We’re friends, aren’t we?”

  “Yes.” I nodded, dislodging his grip. “Friends.” We were always that, though it wasn’t enough for me anymore. I couldn’t go back after having him as a lover. I dreaded the slow death of watching him move on to Vanessa, and the next, and then another. His touch warmed me better than the ocean’s current on my skin. His kisses lifted me like the crest of a powerful wave. His arms felt like the inside of the perfect tube, just the two of us together with the rest of the world on the other side of the curtain. I sighed and resisted touching his earnest face and the tempting coating of morning stubble. There was nothing to be done, with my dad or the looming heartbreak with Ramon. I had as little control over what was happening between us as I did with my dad’s illness. It seemed like all I could do was seize and savor every good moment I had left with both of them.

  * * *

  The shop bell jingled my arrival.

  “You’re late.” Simone looked up, her brow furrowed as I entered the surf shop. On the counter beside her rested a small stack of receipts.

  “Sorry,” I mumbled. The crease between her brows deepened. She cocked her head to the side.

  “Your hair’s not wet? You didn’t go surfing this morning?”

  I shook my head.

  “But the forecast is divine. Everyone’s out that can get out today.”

  I shrugged.

  She stepped out from behind the counter, grasping my shoulders when she got close enough to do so. “What’s going on?” she asked gently, studying my face. “You know I’m not really mad about you being late. It’s not like we’re overrun with customers. I wanted to talk with you about that today. About you taking ownership back again.”

  “But the shop’s yours,” I told her.

  “In name only, Karen. You gave it to me for twenty bucks. That doesn’t constitute a legitimate sale. It was only successful when you ran it. You have the vision, like with the surf lessons. The uptick in sales we’ve had this month is largely due to that.” She moved my braid to my back. “But let’s table that talk for another day. Did something happen with your dad? Or is this because of Ramon?”

  “Both.” I looked her in the eyes, mine filling. Hers glassed in response.

  “Oh, honey.” She hugged me tight, and the tears spilled down my cheeks when she pulled back to look at me again. “Tell me everything.”

  I started with the news of my dad’s downturn. Her expression grew soft, her eyes knowing. She had dealt with a long decline with her mom, though it had been cancer instead of dementia that had taken her life. “I’m so sorry. I’m here to help however I can, but I think you know that. And the other thing that’s troubling you, I’ve already guessed. You’re in love with Ramon.”

  “Yes, but he’s not in love with me.”

  “Are you kidding?” She looked taken aback. “He can’t take his eyes off you.”

  I shook my head.

  Lust, maybe. But even that seemed to have waned. He hadn’t tried anything last night or this morning.

  “We had an agreement. I asked him to get me pregnant.” I shouldn’t have done it. So afraid of another rejection, I had wanted him badly enough to throw decorum to the wind. “I am very much in love with him, but it’s not reciprocal.” I told her about Vanessa. Her eyes flaring in response, I squeezed her arms. “I love you. Love that you’re upset for me. But don’t blame Ramon. It’s not his fault if he doesn’t feel the same way. And don’t tell Linc, please. Or Ash.”

  “I won’t honey.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I love you, Karen.”

  “I know. I’m lucky to have you.”

  “Me, too.”

  I nodded, my vision of my friend wavy through a new flood of tears, this time bittersweet grateful ones.

  * * *

  “How’d work go today?” Ramon asked, leaning an elbow on the surf shop counter.

  “Better.” I glanced up from the daily receipts I was totaling to answer. “A couple more good days like today will go a long way toward making this place profitable.” I gnawed on my bottom lip trying not to pathetically stare at him. He looked delectable, his curls windblown, his handsome face freshly shaved, the bronzed planes and angles of it masculine perfection. His irresistible lips curved up slightly noting my interest. His favorite Aerosmith tee crisp and pressed, hugged his sculpted torso. I had used the extra time before he brought me into work to do laundry. My own cutoffs and halter top were rumpled in contrast, my hair wild. Wisps of it had escaped my braid, a byproduct of my restless fingers and nervous energy. Though he had woken me early enough to surf and eat the breakfast he had cooked, I hadn’t felt like doing either. “How about you?” I chirped. “How did your day go?” My gaze slid to the side. “Did you work some more on that song? It is wonderful by the way.”

  “Thanks. I’m glad you like it.” He sounded detached, and it hadn’t escaped my notice that he hadn’t answered my question about what he had done during the eight hours I had been working.

  Shop key in a tight grip, backpack retrieved from under the counter, I held it like a shield in front of me as I lifted my gaze. “Wer
e you in the studio all day?”

  “Yeah, mostly but I had a noon meeting with my accountant. I would have rather eaten lunch with you.”

  “Oh.” Hope fluttered inside my chest. “Simone and I had to skip lunch. We were too busy. Linc picked her up to take her to an early dinner.”

  “Skipping surfing. Skipping lunch. That’s not like you. I’m worried about you, surfer girl.” He pried my backpack from my grasp and pulled me into him. “I’m here whenever you decide to talk about it. Until then I’m just going to hold onto you.” His arms wrapped me in a secure embrace. My own wound tightly around him. I held back a sigh. No other place in the world, not even my ocean, felt so right.

  After he released me—as if I had been capable of that kind of initiative—I closed and locked up the shop. Then he took me to dinner. Nothing fancy. To go burgers from Hodad’s. We ate them side by side sitting on one of the benches on the pier listening to the waves and watching the surfers.

  For once I didn’t think about the past. I didn’t worry about my ghosts. I didn’t look for anyone else in the distance. For the present, the one I wanted sat right beside me.

  Chapter Fifty-Four

  Karen

  “Let me take that for you, mi cielo,” Ramon insisted, unclipping his guitar strap when he saw me with the bag of trash.

  “No. Keep playing. I’m fine.” But I wasn’t. And I think he knew it. His eyes narrowed as he searched my face. “I’ll be right back.” I stepped outside cinching the sack tighter before tossing it into the bin.

  I recalled each day of the past week. Waking with his warm body pressed against mine. His strong arms around me. The brine in the air, the seagulls crying, the surf crashing. The steady beat of Ramon’s heart beneath my ear. His oak moss and sandalwood scent filling my lungs. Perfection.

  We had settled into a comfortable routine. I would shower first while he whipped up something for breakfast. Then he would drive me to work and pick me up when my shift was over. We would return to the house just the two of us. He would cook dinner while I sat at the bar and kept him company. We would eat on the deck. Then I would clean the kitchen like I had done tonight while he went downstairs and played his guitar. Not a life altering agenda and yet it seemed that way to me.

  Ramon’s beautiful melody drifted out to me, rising about the sound of the surf, curling around my body and luring me back. As I padded across the drive on my bare feet, my eyes snagged on the two surfboards, his and mine. They leaned against each other beside our wetsuits hanging on pegs on the wall.

  They looked right together, the way I had felt with Ramon this past week, except when something reminded me of Vanessa’s phone call. Then my contentment would fade, and I would worry that maybe we were only passing time and not building toward the more permanent togetherness that I desired and that I believed we both deserved.

  Pausing briefly to gather myself, I opened the door and stepped back inside. My eyes found and melded to his. A feeling more warm and meaningful than seeing our surf gear together rolled over me. His gaze seemed to say that he wanted me. That I was the only woman on his mind. That he wanted me to stay forever.

  He sang, his fingers strumming his guitar. The familiar tune he had been crafting the night he had carried me up the stairs burrowed deep inside and settled me.

  “Ramon,” I swallowed, trying to work up the courage to start the conversation I knew we needed to have, but chickening out at the last moment. “Would you teach me how to play the guitar?”

  “Sure.” His eyes brightened. “I never knew you were interested in learning.”

  “I am. I’m interested in everything that’s important to you. If you have the time?”

  “For you I have all the time in the world, surfer girl. Come sit with me.” He dropped down on the plush carpet, leaned back against the leather couch, held the guitar to the side and spread his knees wide. I moved between them. His arms draped around me, he settled the acoustic guitar in my lap. He wasn’t wearing a shirt. The warmth of his skin seeped through my clothing. I had been looking for an excuse to spend more time with him. Learning to play would take lots and lots of it. But like so many things with him I got more than I bargained for. As his fingers covered mine and we stroked the first chord together, I knew the words for how I felt about him. My feelings hadn’t changed over the years. They never would. But could I risk sharing them?

  * * *

  Ramon

  “Thanks for coming over,” I told Ash, taking a long pull on my lager before leaning back over the rail. I had spent a lot of time on the deck and downstairs in the music room over the past week. Karen was still around, but she had been a wistful apparition since that day with her dad. We had only made love once, and I had initiated it, waking her in the night unable to resist her allure a single moment longer. I had tasted her, caressed her, and brought her to climax once with my mouth, and then a second time with my cock. But the next morning she seemed more distant than ever.

  “Wish I could have made it over sooner.” He gave me a long serious look. “You have an albums’ worth of prime material. Real solid. I wondered if you’d at least consider letting Linc and me put the Outside label on it. We don’t have the reach Black Cat does, but…”

  “I’m not interested in their offer.” Vanessa had been driving me nuts with texts all week. I’d had to block her number. “Honestly, I had hoped you would want to represent me all along.”

  He nodded thoughtfully. “I’ll tell you the truth. Anything I offer you upfront as an advance is going to be an insult. We’re just starting out. But that one song, ‘Left Behind’, that has definite top one hundred potential. All it needs is a solid bass line.”

  “I hope you’re right.” The message in the lyrics seemed to resonate with Karen. I hoped it might encourage others who had sacrificed so much like she and her mom. “I already sent the file to Diesel. Karen’s heard me messing around with it,” I explained in response to his questioning look. “She had some ideas about a countermelody.”

  “She has a good ear.”

  I nodded. She had that, and about a million other good things about her that I stood to lose. But I saw the inevitability. She didn’t want to hurt my feelings, but it was only a matter of when not if she left. She had said as much when she had been half asleep and I had carried her up the stairs. She wasn’t falling in love with me again the way I had hoped she would. I had tried every way possible to convince her we were good for each other. But it seemed the harder I tried, the more she pulled away.

  “She was meant to be a rock chick. It smothered her being a soldier’s wife.”

  I gave him a sharp look in response to his astute observation.

  “You two have been holed up at your place for a while now. You get down on one knee like Linc yet?”

  “It’s not like that.” I shook my head, staring out at the waves. I had to let her go. It was killing her to stay. She wasn’t even surfing anymore.

  “How’s it different? You love her, don’t you?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “She’s crazy about you.”

  “At one time, maybe. Not anymore.”

  “She tell you that?”

  “No. But I can feel it. She’s here in my house, but every day she’s more like a ghost. I’m just trying to man up and let her go.”

  “Are you nuts?”

  I turned to focus on him. He wore an incredulous look.

  “I’m nuts about her,” I allowed. “But sometimes that’s not enough.”

  “Yeah, I get that truth totally.” He cocked his head to the side, studying me for a long moment. “I don’t have a lot of experience giving out advice in situations like these, so take it for what it’s probably worth, which isn’t a lot, except that it’s offered with good intentions, and out of love for both you and Karen.”

  I waited patiently, his brow creased. I could tell he was framing his thoughts. “I loved someone once the way you are describing with Karen. I never spoke about my f
eelings. I buried them. In the end when I finally admitted them, they weren’t reciprocated the way I had always wanted.” I knew he was talking about Linc, though it was never discussed. You couldn’t be on the road in a tour bus and with each other twenty-four seven as long as we’d been together as a group and not know all of each other’s secrets. “But I don’t regret being honest about my feelings. It’s allowed us to grow closer without that unspoken truth hanging in the air between us.” His eyes narrowed. “Have you told her how you feel?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t want her to feel an obligation to return those feelings. You know how she is.”

  “No, I don’t know. Not really. But I think you do. I think you know her better than anyone. Better than Simone. Maybe even better than Dominic did.”

  Chapter Fifty-Five

  Karen

  Where was he?

  He should have been here by now. My stomach twisted into knots. I had almost gnawed my bottom lip ragged waiting for him to pick me up at the shop. Simone had long since gone.

  Was he already with someone else?

  Several someones else?

  He had only made love to me one time this week.

  Was he already bored with me?

  I couldn’t accept that when it was hardly the case with me. Being with him. In his house. In his arms. It was so close to everything I wanted. Everything I believed we both needed. I withdrew the key from my pocket, facing the sobering choice that I should have been brave enough to confront days ago—either to slink back to my parent’s place and live without him or stand and fight for him. For us. After all, wasn’t what we had already built together after years of friendship a treasure worth preserving? Wasn’t the potential of what more we could be to each other worth the risk?