Deadly Adventure (Hardy Brothers Security Book 19)

by Lily Harper Hart

  “It didn’t feel good,” Mandy said dryly, reaching for a menu. “I’m pretty sure I’ll survive, though. I’ve been through worse.”

  “Isn’t that the truth,” James muttered. “Still, why didn’t you give him your purse? We talked about this before.”

  “Because he had a grip on it and I couldn’t pull it over my head,” Mandy replied, working hard to tamp down her irritation. “I was more than willing to let him take it. I couldn’t find a way to do it without opening myself up to him.”

  “Oh.” James pressed his lips together. “Well, given that information, I’m sorry for saying that.”

  Mandy rolled her eyes. “Whatever. You’re lame with apologies sometimes. You know that, right?”

  “I’m not going to apologize for worrying about you, baby,” James said. “I will apologize for jumping on you, though.”

  “That’s not what you said last night when you were playing Tarzan after all those beers.”

  James’ cheeks colored as he risked a glance in Jesse’s direction. “It’s not like it sounds.”

  “Hey, whatever you two do in the privacy of your own bedroom is completely your business,” Jesse said. “I’m just curious why this guy would go after Mandy on a narrow walkway like that when he knew people were around.”

  “She probably looked like an easy mark,” James said, slinging an arm over his wife’s diminutive shoulders. “She’s tiny but tough. People always underestimate her.”

  “Oh, that’s possibly the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me,” Mandy said.

  “I’ll say way sweeter things when we’re in the tub tonight,” James promised. “Make sure you eat a big lunch. You’re going to need the fuel.”

  “You guys are a trip,” Jesse said. “How did you know she would be attacked, though?”

  “I played the odds,” James said, resting his forehead against Mandy’s temple. “She’s been stalked, almost blown up, chased by drug lords, kidnapped, almost eaten by alligators, drugged and left for dead, shot at, and a few other things that overlap in my head.”

  Jesse’s mouth dropped open. “No way.”

  “I’m afraid so,” James said, pressing a soft kiss to Mandy’s cheek before straightening in his seat. “I wasn’t exaggerating or being a worrywart when I said she was a trouble magnet.”

  “I guess not,” Jesse said, shaking his head. “That’s just … unbelievable. Aren’t you worried every second of every day?”

  James shrugged. “It’s more like I’m worried every other second.”

  “Funny,” Mandy said, elbowing him in the ribs as she studied her menu. “They have that bangers and mash thing again. I think I want to try it.”

  “Yeah, the food here is not what I expected,” James said. “What is bangers and mash?”

  “It’s sausage and mashed potatoes.”

  James furrowed his brow. “Together? That’s just weird.”

  “You put eggs on top of your pancakes,” Mandy pointed out.

  “Eww, gross,” Jesse said, winking at Mandy.

  “That is a normal breakfast,” James argued.

  “That’s gross.”

  “You dip pickles in tomato juice,” James countered. “You don’t think that’s weird?”

  “Nope,” Mandy replied. “They go together well.”

  “Uh-huh.” James was unconvinced. “What about when you mix pickled beets with cottage cheese?”

  “That is also delicious,” Mandy sniffed.

  “Whatever,” James said. “I’m going with a simple hamburger. Are you sure you want to try the sausage and potatoes thing, baby?”

  “I might try the spotted dick,” Mandy replied, grinning as James shot her a look.

  “Oh, you’re making that up,” James said, frowning as Mandy showed him an entry on the menu. “You don’t even like pudding.”

  “I know, but at least I can say I tried it.”

  “Why not try the Stargazy Pie?” James suggested. “You just came from a magic place. That sounds like a magic dish.”

  Jesse shook his head in warning. “She doesn’t want that.”

  “Why not?”

  “Is she okay with fish heads staring back at her while she’s eating?”

  Mandy made a face. “Gross!”

  “That really is gross,” James said. “Wow. Okay, um, how about steak and kidney pie?”

  “Do you want me to throw up?” Mandy challenged. “I have a weak stomach. You know that.”

  “That’s why I suggested the hamburger,” James argued. “You can’t eat any of this. When we get back to London I’ll take you to that Indian restaurant you saw the other night. You were excited to see that place.”

  “Yes, because it was in an episode of America’s Next Top Model.”

  “We’ll still try it,” James said. “For now, after your big adventure, I would prefer it if you got something I know wouldn’t flip your stomach. We’re going to be in Jesse’s car for more than an hour going back.”

  “Yeah, I don’t want puke in my car,” Jesse said, his eyes twinkling.

  “Fine,” Mandy said. “I want French fries, though.”

  “I can live with that,” James said, knitting his eyebrows together when he saw Jesse laughing. “What?”

  “I want one of her,” Jesse said. “I want … this.”

  “Well, you can’t have her,” James said. “You can find this, though. All you have to do is find an opinionated woman who steals your heart and makes you crazy. It’s not easy, but it’s extremely worth it.”

  “Oh, so cute,” Mandy said, rubbing her nose against James’ cheek. “Now I really promise not to risk gross food.”

  “That’s all I ask, wife. That’s all I ask.”

  6

  Six

  “I can’t believe this is our last night here,” Mandy said Friday evening, slipping her hand into James’ as they approached the ticket window at the wax museum. “I’m a little sad.”

  “We’ll come back,” James said. “We’ll pick a time in the summer when we’re assured of better weather, though. Some days it was nice and other days it was … not.”

  Mandy smirked. “Next time we can make it a longer trip and go to Scotland and Ireland, too. We won’t be hampered by my schedule in a few months.”

  James squeezed Mandy’s hand before releasing it and reaching for his wallet. “How do you feel about that? Are you still going to quit in September?”

  It was a pointed question and the worry associated with it wasn’t lost on Mandy. “I’ve already mentally checked out of that place, James,” she said. “I don’t want to be there any longer. I will finish up my tenure, though. It’s only a few months. After that we’ll be free.”

  James wrinkled his nose as he lowered his mouth to Mandy’s and offered her a sweet kiss. “I love you, baby. I want you happy more than anything else. I can’t wait until you’re out of that courthouse, though.”

  “Oh, really? You could’ve fooled me. I’m dumbfounded that’s the case,” Mandy deadpanned.

  “You’re lucky you’re cute, wife,” James said, shaking his head as he headed for the door. “Okay … ground rules.”

  Mandy stilled, surprised as James cut off her access to the building. “Ground rules?”

  “Yes. I don’t suppose you remember the last time we were in a wax museum, do you?”

  Mandy knew exactly where her husband was going with this conversation and yet feigned innocence all the same. “Yes. It was in New Orleans. It was a very cool museum, even though you and Grady spent half your time there checking to see if the figures were anatomically correct.”

  “We did that for five minutes,” James countered. “You’re also leaving out the most important part of the story. Do you remember the guys who isolated you in that horror room? They turned out to be bad and I almost got in a fight.”

  “I remember. You were very sexy.”

  “Oh, you can’t con me with that look, wife,” James chided. “You can, however, con
me with it when we get back to the hotel room. For now, you are to remain at my side. You are not to wander off. In fact, I would prefer it if you held my hand the entire time.”

  “Perhaps I want to hold something else,” Mandy suggested.

  “Ugh. You’re killing me with the innuendo,” James muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Okay. I’m going to romance the crap out of you when we get back to the hotel. I need you to promise to stick close to me, though. I … just promise.”

  “I promise,” Mandy said, squeezing his hand. “I was just messing with you. I have no inclination to wander off without you. It’s more fun being with you that being away from you.”

  “Yes, now you just doubled your romance quotient for the evening,” James said, smacking a quick kiss on Mandy’s lips. “Do your thing. Enjoy yourself. Don’t cause me to have a heart attack, though. It’s never fun.”

  “It is when we’re sweaty and I’m the shark.”

  “Oh, woman. You really are the best thing that ever happened to me.”

  “THIS is neat,” Mandy said, excitedly running her hand over a horror tableau in the museum’s basement. “It’s like a feast of heads.”

  James knit his eyebrows together as he studied the rectangular table and gruesome display of decapitated heads. He would never understand Mandy’s fascination with horror movies. He didn’t hate them, although he would’ve preferred it if she at least pretended to be frightened and climbed onto his lap while watching them. Usually she rooted for the killer, which was beyond odd in his book.

  “You and Grady love this stuff,” James said. “I’m starting to wonder if you wish you’d married him instead. He gets these … things. I don’t.”

  “I could never live with Grady,” Mandy said, her eyes flashing as she faked being scandalized. “You’re much more handsome.”

  “That’s a good answer,” James said. “Make sure you tell it to Grady when we see him Sunday.”

  “We’re seeing them right away?” Mandy asked, surprised. “I thought we would have the day alone before going back to work and get together as a family the following weekend.”

  “Ally insisted,” James explained. “She’s demanding a barbecue because she missed us. Personally, I think she just wants all her loot. When I suggested that, though, I was accused of being a bad brother.”

  “You’re a good brother,” Mandy countered. “You’re just a little overprotective.”

  “Yes, well, the women in my life are masters at finding trouble,” James said, studying the heads in jars in the wall alcoves. “I can’t help myself from wanting to keep them safe. This is seriously sick.”

  “I like it,” Mandy said, moving to his side and tilting her head. “It reminds me of The Walking Dead and all those heads in the fish tanks.”

  “You’re sick, too,” James said. “I’m already in love with you, though, so that’s all that matters. I like your sick mind.”

  “That’s good, because I have an idea.”

  James briefly pressed his eyes shut. “Those words send chills through my body, baby. This won’t end well.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “I know that you are the prettiest and smartest woman in the world,” James said. “Your ideas often blow up in your beautiful face, though.”

  “I’m pretty sure that’s an exaggeration,” Mandy said. “Not the beautiful part, mind you. The other stuff.”

  James grinned. He loved it when she was in a playful mood. “What’s your idea?”

  “I think you should invite Jesse to come back with us – or at least put in two weeks notice here and then leave – and offer him a job with you.”

  James’ mouth dropped open as stunned disbelief washed over him. “That’s what you were thinking? You never cease to amaze me, wife.”

  “What did you think I was thinking?”

  James shrugged. “I thought you were going to suggest some weird bonding ritual … or double date … or even a new shark game for the hot tub. I was looking forward to the possibility of that last one.”

  “I do have a new idea about a shark game,” Mandy conceded. “I’ve been thinking about Jesse, though. He doesn’t seem happy here, James. In fact, well, he seems a little lost.”

  “Oh, see, I was wrong,” James teased. “This is about your incessant need to fix everyone’s lives. Continue.”

  “I don’t feel the need to fix everyone’s lives,” Mandy said. “I just … he seems sad. I don’t think he has a lot of friends over here. You could use more help at the office. You were just saying that two weeks ago. You already know Jesse and what he can do. It might be a good fit.”

  James rubbed his chin as he considered the suggestion. “No offense, Mandy, but I didn’t get the feeling you liked Jesse all that much.”

  “I didn’t like him the first night,” Mandy admitted. “I thought he was kind of rude, and it always bugs me when people think the only way I could’ve made you love me is by getting pregnant. I’m used to it, though.”

  “Baby, that was about me, not you,” James said, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. “I was … different … back then. Jesse wasn’t exaggerating when he said I had no intention of ever getting married. You changed my whole life.”

  “For the better, right?” Mandy adopted a teasing tone, but James knew she needed to hear a truthful answer.

  “I don’t think life could ever be better than it already is,” James said. “I didn’t know it was possible to love as purely … or as deeply … or as completely as I love you. Getting that love in return is the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever experienced.”

  “I didn’t need you to rip your heart out and give it to me,” Mandy said, instinctively reaching forward to hug him. “Thank you, though.”

  James ran his hands down her slight back, sighing as she melded herself to him. “Jesse is wowed by you,” he said. “He thinks you’re something special. Maybe you’re right about him wanting more.”

  “I think you’re exaggerating about the ‘something special’ thing, but I do think he’s unhappy here,” Mandy said. “He’s meeting us for dinner tonight. Why don’t you give it some thought while I’m enjoying the gross things. It might be a good thing for everyone.”

  “I’ll consider it,” James said, kissing her forehead. “Now … gross me out, wife.”

  “I thought you didn’t like the gross stuff.”

  “I don’t, but it turns you on,” James said. “It’s our last night here and I’m going to want to play a lot of games. This works out to my advantage.”

  “Be still my heart. Oh, look, there’s an actual heart on that plate.”

  “And let the grossness begin!”

  DINNER that night was a festive occasion, Mandy excitedly enjoying the offerings at a Chinese restaurant – both of the Hardys were tired of heavy food – and James and Jesse chatting as if it might be the last time they would ever see each other.

  “I need to go to the restroom,” Mandy said, poking James in the ribs to get him to move.

  “You’re not sick, are you?” James was momentarily worried.

  “No. I did drink a bunch of wine and water, though. You do other things besides throw up in the bathroom.”

  “I forgot,” James teased, kissing her nose. “I’ll go with you to make sure you’re safe.”

  Mandy rolled her eyes and made a disgusted sound in the back of her throat. “The bathroom is right there.” She pointed to a hallway directly behind their booth. “I’ll be fine. You don’t want to leave Jesse alone anyway. Those women at the bar have been eyeing him and they might undress him if we’re not careful. We have to save him from that horrible fate.”

  “Cute, wife,” James said, smirking as Jesse shifted his eyes to the bar and lowering his voice. “I know what you’re doing. Be careful.”

  “I’m always careful.”

  “Be more careful than that.”

  James let her out of the booth and watched until she entered the bathroom b
efore sitting again. Now that it was just the two of them he was unsure how to proceed.

  “So … um … Mandy had an idea.”

  Jesse jerked his eyes back to James. “What kind of idea? Is this some weird shark fetish thing? If so, the chick is odd.”

  “She’s definitely odd,” James agreed, nodding. “That’s one of the reasons I love her more than anything. She doesn’t fit into a mold. She’s a mold all on her own.”

  “You’re so lovesick it makes me want to puke,” Jesse said. “It also makes me a little jealous. I’ve never seen you so happy. I didn’t think it was possible to be as happy as you are.”

  “I didn’t either,” James admitted. “Mandy changed that. I think her suggestion might be able to change that for you, too.”

  “Okay, I’m listening,” Jesse said, flashing James a tepid smile. “What’s this suggestion?”

  “She thinks you should come back to the U.S. and work for me.”

  “I … what?” Jesse narrowed his eyes. “Are you serious?”

  “I am,” James confirmed. “I’ve been thinking about adding another body. This would give you a steady gig and a way to work on high profile jobs while you save money to start your own business. You don’t have to stay in Michigan after the fact, but you might find you like it.”

  “I … don’t know what to say,” Jesse said, rubbing the back of his neck. “I would be lying if I said the idea of going back home wasn’t appealing. I just don’t know, though.”

  “You have time to think about it,” James said. “You don’t have to make any decisions now.”

  “Can I ask why Mandy wants this so much?” Jesse asked. “I didn’t think she liked me.”

  “She’s not a fan of you suggesting she got pregnant to trick me into marrying her, but she likes you okay now that you’ve calmed down a bit,” James said. “She’s worried you’re unhappy. Because she’s a woman, she feels the need to fix that.”

  Jesse snorted. “I don’t know if I want to deal with that on a regular basis. Still, she’s kind of sweet.”

  “She’s extremely sweet,” James said. “Just … think about it. You don’t have to decide now. We’re leaving first thing in the morning, but you have my number. You might decide once we’re gone that this is the best plan for you.”