Locked Inside

by Annette Mori

  As they walked into the room, I greeted them with a small wave.

  “Oh, good, you’re here, Belinda. How about if we take you girls to lunch before we head back? Have you eaten yet?” Dr. Sullivan asked.

  I shook my head.

  “Perfect. I’m starving,” Carly’s dad added.

  “The walking stomach talks,” Carly teased.

  Your test is scheduled for ten am tomorrow. Your professor was fine with giving you a makeup exam. I held up my tablet.

  “Thanks, Belinda. I’m already prepared so maybe a pre-date tonight,” Carly whispered in my ear.

  I giggled and her parents turned their wide-eyed faces in my direction.

  “Belinda, you laughed? I assume this means your speech therapy is coming along,” Dr. Sullivan enthused.

  I nodded.

  “She can say no now,” Carly interjected.

  I assumed she left out telling them the other three words I managed to say for a specific reason. I suspected she wanted to grab her mom and have a mother daughter chat at a later time, explaining the new development in our relationship. I would have to do the same with my family. I knew Fran would be over the moon, but I wasn’t quite sure what my parents would think about this. I knew they loved Carly, so I assumed they would be happy.

  “That’s a great start, Belinda. Now can we talk about that at lunch? Still hungry here,” her dad whined.

  “God, Bill, I swear you can be so impatient when it comes to feeding your belly,” Carly’s mom chastised.

  It’s okay. I’m kind of hungry too, I wrote to save him from further rebuke.

  “See. Thank God Belinda here agrees with me,” he remarked.

  At lunch, I could tell that Carly’s head still hurt, because she was relatively quiet throughout the meal. I was glad when her parents decided to leave shortly after lunch and, for the first time, I tucked her in bed instead of the reverse. The three-hour nap she took did wonders for her health, because after she woke up, she was eager to go out for dinner and that night she let me know just how much she loved me.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  “I know I said we should have our first date after finals, but I don’t think I can wait that long. Will you have dinner with me tonight? I know you didn’t get much sleep last night, so after dinner, we can turn in early.” Carly had such a hopeful look on her face—how could I refuse.

  I nodded.

  We went to the local bistro and I’m sure it wasn’t hard to figure out that we were a couple as we spent the evening with our hands clasped together whenever we weren’t eating. Our moon eyed looks across the table were a dead giveaway. Neither of us was trying to tamp our feelings down anymore.

  “If I don’t get to kiss you soon, I swear I’m going to burst. Can I?” Carly blurted, the minute we were back in our room.

  I nodded.

  Carly lifted me out of my chair and laid me out on my bed. She stretched her body next to mine and pushed a lock of my hair to the side as her hand slowly made its way down my neck and across my shoulders. She casually left her hand on my hip as she leaned in to kiss me.

  She used her other hand to prop herself up and she began her slow agonizing exploration of my lips.

  I was moaning when I felt her first attempt to capture my lips. She brushed her tongue across my bottom lip and sucked gently. When she tentatively sought entrance, our tongues danced together with building passion. Her kiss sent shivers down my body and I felt my nipples protruding through my soft hemp shirt.

  She sighed and I felt moisture between my legs.

  When she pulled away to reposition herself, I immediately felt the loss of connection.

  I pulled her down to me again and this time, her body covered mine and I felt her thigh grind into my pelvis which sent me into an instant state of arousal and frenzy. I had been waiting forever for this moment to happen and I wasn’t going to let it pass me by.

  “Oh, Belinda, I want to make love with you so badly, it’s damn near killing me. I am so in love with you, it hurts. Please tell me you want this, too,” Carly pleaded.

  “Yuh, Ga, I lu ya tah.” I managed to mumble. Of course I meant to say yes, God, I love you too, but I was still very much a work in progress. It didn’t matter, because she understood me.

  She lifted me up and our nightly ritual evolved. She removed my clothes and her loving gaze affected me like nothing else I’d ever experienced. My arousal entered the stratosphere. As she sat on the bed next to me she pulled the covers over my exposed body. I pointed to her and she stood up to remove her clothes. She crossed her arms and blushed as she stood before me, completely uncovered.

  I smiled at her to reassure her that it was just me and after all the times she saw me so exposed, everything would be just fine. I put all of my love into the look I gave her.

  “Butif,” I murmured in an attempt to tell her how beautiful she looked to me.

  She picked up all our clothes and placed them on the dresser for sorting out the next day.

  We were both completely naked for the first time ever and she cautiously approached as she pulled the covers away and lay down next to me.

  I desperately wanted to have the same effect on her as she had on me, but I was very inexperienced in the art of making love. When you can’t ask questions without a bloody tablet in the middle of the experience, it’s a lot harder to communicate. I had to depend on non-verbal clues, physical reaction, and whatever vocalizations she gave to propel me in the right direction. I depended on my other finely tuned senses to lead me to the promised land, but it wasn’t pretty. We fumbled quite a bit with one another, but that didn’t make the experience any less glorious. I tried to feel, smell, and hear when I was on the right track.

  When my hand traveled across her chest and lingered on her breast, she moaned. I hesitated before I took a chance and brought my mouth to her nipple and gently sucked. It took some effort to move my body so that I could taste another part of her body for the first time. She rewarded me with another moan and the presence of a musky smell. I knew this was her body producing the scent of arousal. It drove me mad and I could feel a leaking sensation. Sure, I’d felt this before when I’d experimented with touching myself, but this was a whole new level of pleasure. The scent of my arousal mingled with hers to produce a uniquely pleasant aroma that I would later come to recognize as the coming together of two perfect bodies in an expression of love.

  She gently pushed my mouth away and laid me on my back as she placed feather light kisses on my neck. She stopped and I could feel her slight hesitation.

  I stroked her hair and cocked my head sending her a silent question.

  “I have a major confession to make,” she stuttered. “I, uh, well, I don’t really know what I’m doing. I have the general idea from all those books I’ve read, but this is my first time. I want to make you feel good, but I’m not terribly experienced. Will you help guide me?” she asked.

  I nodded.

  Her hand hovered close to my breast without actually touching it. A sort of giggle came out of my mouth and she arched her eyebrow.

  I found it amusing that she’d given me a bath, helped me change my clothes and had been a part of some of my most intimate personal care, yet she wasn’t sure if she should touch my breast.

  “Guh head. Okay,” I mumbled in my less than perfect speech.

  She gently stroked my breast with her hand and looked to me for affirmation.

  I smiled.

  Carly continued her tentative exploration of my body and when she reached my tuft of hair at the apex of my legs she paused. “Can you feel this?”

  Boy, could I ever. In about two seconds I was sure I was going to squirt juice on her. We’d never really talked about what I could and couldn’t feel below my waist.

  I nodded. I wanted to grab my tablet to explain everything I was feeling in great detail, but I knew that would be a definite mood killer.

  For someone who’d never done this before, she sure hit th
e jackpot on her first try. Beginner’s luck, maybe. When her timid fingers brushed across my clit, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. I moaned again and the leaky faucet increased. I bucked in an effort to get her to continue to stroke me on my most sensitive spot. I think she got the message because I didn’t have to cry out, please, don’t stop, because she didn’t. Every now and then, I would gently touch her hand to reposition her to just the right spot. It just felt right for me to direct her without speaking. She continued to touch me until I felt the groundswell of sensation culminating in a powerful orgasm that struck with force. The pulsating continued for several seconds as I felt the waves of pleasure completely take control of my body.

  “Was that…uh…okay? I mean did you just, uh…you know?” Carly asked.

  I nodded and smiled at her. I hoped that my smile conveyed all the love I had for her at that moment and how much her gentle touch reached to my innermost core.

  I’d learned how to masturbate, but this felt completely new. It was a magnificent feeling and I wanted to experience it again and again. I also wanted her to feel as glorious as I was feeling.

  When I caught my breath, I buried my hands in her hair and gently pulled her mouth against mine.

  She laid her body on top of mine, sending another wave of sensation and devoured my mouth in a searing kiss. It drove me wild again and I could feel my body start to respond, but I wanted her to feel what I’d just experienced.

  I managed to flip her onto her back. Although my legs were still useless, my upper body was strong after months of navigation in my wheelchair around the immense UW campus. I was unsure about what to do, but figured I could do the same thing to her as she did to me. I’d confess to her later that this was also my first time, but I depended on her ability to read me and know that I wanted her to do the same thing—talk to me or direct me to what would make her scream with pleasure. Since I’d gotten a positive reaction before when I sucked on her breasts, I spent a few moments worshipping them as I made my way down to my ultimate destination. I couldn’t wait to elicit the same response I’d had to her wonderful touch. Since Quinn and I had never quite progressed beyond a little touching here and there strictly topside—this was a completely new experience.

  Who needed legs when you have two perfectly working arms and a fully functioning tongue. I wanted to send her to heights never reached before. I wondered whether I should penetrate her, as I lovingly stroked what I hoped was the same sensitive spot she’s found on me.

  I didn’t have to wait long for her to cry out. “Please, stop teasing, and go inside.”

  As I continued to stroke her beautiful pink lips, I pushed my middle finger inside and curled it against her walls, hoping I’d find her g-spot. I’d read about it and figured how hard can it be to find. Turns out it’s harder than you think, but I kept fumbling until I thought I found the right place. I don’t know if I ever did or not, but what I was doing seemed to have a positive response.

  She writhed beneath me. “Oh, God, yes, you’ve hit the perfect spot. Please don’t stop now. I’m almost there.”

  That was music to my ears and I continued my ministrations to her wildly moving hips. I probably kept missing the right spot, because I really had no idea what I was doing, but it seems like when you have a bunch of pent up sexual energy, it doesn’t take much. She pushed up one more time as I felt the contractions pulse on my finger.

  Finally, her body settled against the mattress and her breathing returned to normal.

  “Wow, just wow. I knew it would be fabulous, but that was so unbelievable I don’t even have the words to describe it,” she exclaimed. “I suppose the fact that I’ve been dreaming about this for a very long time helped. I’m pretty sure that all the anticipation didn’t hurt one bit. I was so ready for you to touch me and anywhere would have probably sent me over the edge, but God, Belinda, I never thought it would feel that great.”

  We made love several more times throughout the night and our bodies remained connected until the morning. Each time we made love, we learned a little more about one another.

  I’m sure I had a look of pure bliss the next morning, but I wanted to write down my thoughts because my speech was still so limited.

  You probably figured out that this was my first time. I wish I’d been more experienced, but I hope you felt every ounce of love when I touched you. I love you and I loved making love with you. You made me feel so loved and I felt every one of your touches deep inside my heart. I only wish that I made you feel half as good as you made me feel.

  “Oh, Belinda, you did. I love you, too and I’m glad you were my first. Remember, I always said I wanted my first time to be with someone I was madly in love with. Well, you certainly fit that bill. I’m glad I waited.”

  Dit,” I managed to squeak out. Of course I meant ditto and somehow I just knew Carly understood.

  I’d fantasized about Carly’s mouth and tongue doing marvelous things to the most private parts of my body, but I was far too shy to come right out and ask her. When she tentatively broached the subject the next morning, I was overjoyed.

  “Belinda, do you think you would like it if I tasted you?” she hedged.

  All I could do was nod my head eagerly as I lay back down on the bed with my tablet still in my hand.

  Carly grabbed my tablet, set it on the desk, and ran her hand down my hip. She carefully parted my legs while she kissed every part of my body until she reached the moist curls.

  The anticipation was driving me crazy.

  She parted my hair and swiped her tongue across my clit in an exploratory gesture. When I groaned and a flood of new juices reached her lips, I guess she felt inspired to continue.

  I’d never felt anything so glorious in all my life. My arousal was building slowly and she kept me on the edge for what felt like hours but was probably seconds. When I finally climaxed, it almost felt like I was floating above the bed.

  She crawled back up to me and soundly kissed me. I could taste myself on her lips.

  “God, Belinda that was…I mean you tasted so sweet. I’m just warning you that I’m going to want to do that all the time now,” Carly gushed.

  I smiled and motioned for her to grab my tablet. I didn’t think I could maneuver myself well enough to do the same thing, but I desperately wanted to taste her and have her experience what I’d just felt.

  She handed me my device as I sat up in bed just enough to compose a short message.

  I hesitated before writing down my request.

  “Don’t be embarrassed, Belinda. You can tell me anything,” she said.

  I took a deep breath and started writing. I want to taste you too, but I don’t think I’m as nimble as you are. Would you—

  I stopped writing. I didn’t know how to ask her to basically sit on my face because that sounded so crass to me.

  She looked at what I wrote and grinned. She removed my tablet from my hands where I was clutching it like a life raft. “Don’t worry. I think I know what you’re asking.”

  After she’d moved the tablet out of the way again, she positioned me on the bed and hovered over me as I reached up to touch her.

  I parted her lips and gently sucked on her clit until it hardened. I could feel my own arousal swelling as she moaned and moved on top of me. I guessed that she was holding back and trying not to let her full weight smother me, but I couldn’t get enough and was urging her to relax.

  “I’m so close, Belinda. Oh, God, that feels so good,” she exclaimed.

  A few seconds later I could feel the pulsations on my tongue as she came in my mouth.

  She rolled off of me and collapsed by my side.

  “Belinda, you are amazing. I’ve never felt anything like that. Damn, I think we’ve created a monster. Is it crazy that I already want to taste you again?”

  I shook my head and smiled at her. The flood gates were open now and we would soon spend many hours finding new and creative ways to please one another despite my limitations.r />
  Even though the beds in the dorm were small, we never spent a night apart again when we were at the UW.

  We were young and in love and couldn’t get enough of one another throughout the rest of our college days. Summers and breaks were always a challenge for us, because we weren’t able to spend the same amount of alone time with one another. It just felt wrong to make love at the respective homes of our parents.

  I still had two major hurdles to my recovery before I could truly feel deserving of Carly’s plans for our future. It would be an insufferable amount of time before I regained the use of my legs and could speak more clearly.

  Chapter Thirty

  The summer of 2011, with the help of Taylor, my ability to speak advanced so rapidly that even Carly, my biggest supporter, was amazed.

  Carly would take me into Seattle twice a week for my therapy treatments because I refused to see any other therapist besides Taylor. Secretly, we relished those moments where we could spend the day together without having to hold back. Although we both told our families the score, it still felt awkward to engage in public displays of affection.

  By the end of the summer, I got rid of my tablet and forced myself to communicate through speech alone. Sometimes it was frustrating because my words often came out garbled and easily misunderstood. Carly was the only person who understood me one hundred percent of the time.

  On one of our trips into Seattle, we went to visit Abbie at the rehab center. She looked good and she had made a few friends that eventually became some of her greatest support through her recovery process. In a way, we probably both experienced similar challenges. I could relate to the difficulty she experienced and the setbacks that plagued us both. To my knowledge, she has never taken another drink and has several years of sobriety under her belt. She often gives back through volunteer work at the rehab center where she got clean and sober.

  In the beginning, it was hard for Carly and Abbie to ease into a comfortable friendship. Abbie had numerous demons to slay before that was possible and Carly needed to truly forgive her for the part she played in her injury.