by Dori Lavelle
“I admit it hit me hard to hear about you and Heat. But I respect your choices. What matters is that you’re happy.” He paused and kissed the tip of her nose. “I came to say goodbye.”
Melisa’s heart clenched. “You’re leaving? I thought… You said you were staying for a month.” She had never expected him to walk back into her life. Now that he had, she wasn’t sure she wanted him to leave again. Especially now that she knew the cancer would take him so soon.
“There’s nothing I’d love more than to stay. But I can’t. It wasn’t fair of me to show up and turn your world upside down. I have to leave before I hurt you more than I already have. I already got what I came for. I saw you again, even for a short time. I’ll die happy.”
“You can’t go.” A hot lump blocked her throat as she shook her head. “Don’t go.” She grasped at straws. She was certain his departure now would hurt as much as it had the first time.
Scott embraced her and she clung on as if she could keep him with her that way.
Feeling his heart beat, Melisa wished she could do something to make it beat for longer than only a few more months. “Stay here. We can tell Heat. You can trust him. He loved you. He’ll understand…eventually. We can take care of you together.”
“No. I’ve done enough harm. I can’t continue to stand in your way. I love you too much.”
Chapter Twenty
Although Melisa had still had a tiny flame burning in her heart for Heat, the day she married Scott had been the happiest day of her life. With him, she had found a home.
They had a big wedding after graduation. The ceremony had taken place in a romantic chapel in Serendipity and the reception on a luxury boat.
They were just starting a life together and couldn’t really afford such a lavish wedding. But they didn’t pay a dime for it. Some months after Scott had popped the question, Melisa had stumbled upon a contest in a bridal magazine. Without holding out any hope, as she had never won anything in her life, she’d half-heartedly entered. Three weeks later, she got a call. They had won an all-expenses-paid dream wedding and honeymoon. Melisa saw it as a sign that they were meant to be together.
As they said their vows, Melisa said goodbye to Heat and the future they would never have. Sure, she had felt a tiny twinge at having to let go of the past, but the happiness and contentment she’d felt at the prospect of her future with a wonderful, committed man like Scott overrode that pain.
“From the moment I met you, I knew you were my future,” Scott said, grinning. He took her breath away, looking handsome in his black, designer suit. “I knew I’d found my home in your heart. You give me a reason to take the next breath. Melisa, I promise to live each day striving to make your life the best it can be. I will love you and protect you and put you before myself. Thank you for agreeing to be my wife.”
Melisa’s heart wrapped itself around his words, allowed them to seep into its depths, to revive, to restore, to mend every broken piece of her. When it came her turn to say her vows, she crumpled up the piece of paper she had written them on and grasped his hands. She would speak straight from the heart. “The promise I make to you today, I will never make to another man. From this moment until forever and a day, I will belong to you alone. I will wake up each morning ready to love you more than the day before. You came into my life and taught me how to love.” When they started dating, she had told him about the man who had broken her heart, but not that that same man was his best friend, and best man. “You’re everything I’ve been waiting for, my love. I promise you my heart and all of me.”
After the reception, the guests left the boat, and Melisa and Scott stayed. They would be spending the first night of their marriage there before leaving in the morning for their honeymoon in Tahiti.
Melisa gasped when they stepped into their cabin. It was decorated all in white, except for bouquets of yellow roses everywhere she looked and fresh rose petals scattered over the double bed. She was in heaven and Scott was the perfect man to experience it with.
“Ready for our wedding night?” Scott asked as they sank onto the soft bed and he scattered kisses all over her face.
“More than anything. I can’t believe we’re married.” She giggled, feeling a bottomless sense of peace and happiness.
“I can. I knew we were meant for each other, even before we met. My heart has always been beating to the rhythm of yours, my love.”
Melisa laughed. “Is that a line from a song?”
“No.” He removed her tiara and loosened her hair, allowing the shiny curls to cascade down her shoulders and back. “Those words are straight from my heart.” He tugged at the ribbons that held her wedding gown corset in place and Melisa felt instant relief…and her body starting to respond to her new husband.
After undressing Melisa, Scott took his time exploring her curves, kissing, licking, and breathing love into every corner of her, reminding her that she was the only woman for him. With every touch of his fingers on her tingling skin, he left the mark of his love. Scott didn’t stop until he’d pushed her beyond the point of no return. When she finally welcomed him into her body and they merged, they moved together in exquisite harmony, and ecstasy flowed through Melisa’s body like warm honey. Then the passion they created exploded. Yet she had never felt more whole, more intact. He had put her back together, piece by piece.
Chapter Twenty-One
Melisa stepped slowly into Mel’s Delights. Honestly, she wasn’t ready to get back to work or to her normal life. All she felt like doing was locking herself inside a dark room, and pretending her world wasn’t crashing down. But baking was a part of her, and it had helped her heal before. Maybe it would do the same this time.
Josie received her with a warm hug. They had been friends since high school, and she had always been there for Melisa when she had needed her most. Also an experienced baker, she had been the person Melisa had sold her bakery to when she’d needed the money to pay off her gambling debts. But when Melisa had been ready to start over, Heat had bought back the bakery for her. Even though Josie owned a wedding planning business with her four sisters, Mel’s Delights was close to Josie’s heart, and she always volunteered to step in whenever Melisa was away and needed someone to keep it running.
Melisa hugged her friend and waved at one of her employees, who stood behind the glass display waiting for customers.
She and Josie disappeared into Melisa’s office. The cramped but immaculate room looked exactly how Melisa had left it. Her cookbooks as well as labeled recipe folders were stacked next to each other in alphabetical order. From where she stood, Melisa didn’t detect one speck of dust on the mahogany table. Josie had kept everything neat and tidy, the way Melisa liked it.
Melisa didn’t sit down at her desk, but in the only other chair in the room. She didn’t want to look as if she was returning to work. She wasn’t sure when she would. As she crossed her legs, she couldn’t believe she had come here. She had left the hotel with the intention of going for her usual walk at the lake, but for some reason, she’d changed her mind and turned around.
“I know it will take time for you to heal emotionally, but how are you feeling physically?” Josie perched on the edge of the desk and crossed her slender legs. Her long blond hair was wrapped into a ballerina bun at the nape of her neck.
“I’m okay. I feel tender sometimes, but my body has recovered well.” Since Scott’s return, the emotional torture had been so great that the aches that had followed the surgery had taken the back burner. It had been over eight weeks now, though—more than enough time for her physical wounds to heal.
“I’m so happy to hear that.” Josie’s smiled. “Are you ready to come back…to work, I mean?”
“I’m not sure yet. Can you run the place a bit longer? Two weeks more, maybe? I’m here only to thank you again for stepping in for me.”
Josie leaned forward and squeezed Melisa’s shoulder, her blue gaze filled with sympathy. “You know I’m here for you. And it’
s not as if I’m working for free.” Her rosebud mouth curled in a smile again. “Take as much time as you need to heal. Losing a baby isn’t a small thing.”
“No.” Melisa swallowed hard. “It isn’t.” It was even harder when there was nothing to help her forget. Last night she’d had a vivid dream in which she was singing a lullaby while holding her baby on the porch swing. The emotions had been so real that when she woke up in the morning, she cried for an hour. And she’d craved whiskey so badly she thought she’d go nuts, while at the same time practically gagging at the thought of drinking.
When Carlene called her during breakfast, she urged Melisa to stay strong, and reminded her of the many scars her addictions had left behind. She had also suggested that Melisa consider going to AA meetings again. Melisa had thought about that on several occasions, but she also hadn’t wanted to be reminded of what a stronghold a few drops of a liquid could have on her. But this morning she was literally shaking from the deep-rooted desire for a drink. Before she left the hotel, she called the AA group she used to attend and informed them she would be joining them once a week for a while.
“I appreciate your help, Josie. I might drop in from time to time to bake a cake or two.”
“That’s a fantastic idea.” Josie lowered herself off the desk. “Why don’t you start today? Someone ordered a Mickey Mouse birthday cake. That should cheer you up.”
Melisa hesitated, but she agreed. One cake, and then she would return to her hiding place.
It didn’t end with one cake. Melisa was covered in flour for most of the day as she baked not one, but three cakes, and a couple of cupcakes with the extra batter. Doing what she loved calmed her nerves, and she found herself smiling and humming at odd times, the problems in her life momentarily forgotten. She spent most of the time in the kitchen anyway and didn’t have to risk bumping into her regulars, who might be tempted to ask whether the baby had arrived. After the third cake, she slipped out through the back and went back to the hotel, where she enjoyed a long shower. She had made a decision. Once a week, she’d go to her AA meetings and then to Mel’s Delights to bake. She didn’t have to jump right back into her old life. She’d concentrate on taking one step at a time.
After her shower, Melisa called Scott to confirm their dinner at the inn. Since she had managed to convince him to stay for a few more days, she was determined to make sure he ate right. She could only ensure that when she actually saw him. But to her surprise, Scott cancelled, saying he didn’t feel well.
“I can still come over to take care of you.” She felt sick to her stomach with worry. The good feelings she had collected at Mel’s Delights disappeared, replaced with fear.
“No.” Scott’s voice was firm. “I don’t want you to see me this way.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Heat pulled into the station and hopped off the fire truck. He and his partner, Joe, checked that all the necessary equipment inside the vehicle was put back in place, and that all supplies were restocked. It didn’t take them long; not much was used this time since the dispatched call had turned out to be a false alarm.
“See you later, Joe,” he said as he turned to walk into the station. It had office quarters, sleeping quarters, a bathroom, a kitchen, and even a TV room and gym. If Heat wanted to, he didn’t have to go anywhere. The station was his second home.
Inside the building, Heat removed his gear and splashed water on his face, letting it air dry and cool his skin. On his way to the kitchen, he passed the bulletin board and stopped to check out the schedule for the next day. It was 8:00 p.m. now and his shift would be over at 6:00 a.m. tomorrow, but he didn’t plan on going home. He needed to stay busy. He’d convinced Darius, the station officer, to give him additional tasks. But as he studied the sheet, he didn’t see his name listed on the schedule for the next four days. Frowning, he stepped away from the board.
Inside the kitchen, he went straight to the fridge. He removed a bottle of water and turned to face his colleagues. There were four of them sitting around the table. Most were finishing up their dinner, and Joe, with a steaming bowl in front of him, was just getting started. From the meaty smell that lingered in the air, it had to be some kind of stew. Heat might have to miss another meal. His appetite was completely in the dumps lately.
As he pulled out an empty chair, it hit him that the room had gone silent as soon as he’d walked in. Damn, looked like he was the topic of the day again. It was public knowledge around town that he and Melisa were separated. Some even went as far as saying they were getting divorced. Since he never confirmed nor denied their suspicions, they all believed it to be true.
Heat knew most of his colleagues were concerned, since they spent so much time together and were practically family. But he didn’t have answers himself. Only Melisa did.
“You okay, Dane?” Joe asked and dipped a chunk of bread into his bowl of stew. He normally never said much, preferring to work out in the gym instead, building even more muscle than he already had. Though his body and boy-next-door looks turned girls’ heads, he was completely committed to his fiancée Lory, who lived in Madison and visited every weekend.
Heat unscrewed the cap of his water bottle and looked around the table. Everyone was watching him. Maybe it was time to say something. But he wouldn’t make it easy for them. “Why do you ask? Do I look sick or something?” he joked.
Jackpot leaned forward, his bushy eyebrows meeting in the middle of his face. “We heard you’re having trouble with the wife.” Jackpot had earned his nickname because of his habit of playing the lottery every other day, always believing he was one scratch card away from becoming a millionaire. The most he’d won in the ten years Heat had known him was ten bucks, but he still didn’t give up.
Heat narrowed his eyes. “Is that so? What kind of trouble?”
As all eyes turned to Jackpot, Jackpot tipped his bowl and swiped the rest of the stew into his mouth with a piece of bread. He chewed, his gaze glued on Heat’s face, and swallowed. “Word is out that Melisa lost the baby and left you. Whatever you’re going through, we want you to know we’re here. We’re a family. You can tell us anything.”
Yes, Heat knew that, and he also knew he could trust them. But he didn’t trust their wives and girlfriends. He was positive most women in town were talking about Melisa already, happy she was the one suffering instead of them. When he walked down the street, he caught glimpses of them through café windows, sipping their fancy cocktails, and pretending to be better than everyone else. Whenever they caught his eye, they huddled together conspiratorially, their mouths running.
“I know that, and I definitely appreciate your concern.” Heat leaned back and drank his water. “My wife and I are going through a rough phase, but we will be fine.” He gazed at the door. “Anyone see Darius?”
As soon as he spoke, the bell shrilled, signaling a possible fire emergency.
Darius stormed in. He was bald at the top of his head and wore a ponytail at the back. Even though he was stocky, he had the energy of a horse. At fifty, he was only seven years older than Heat, but was like a father to him. He’d been supportive when Scott died and Heat had almost given up his job. In the end, Darius had convinced him not to let the fire win. For one life lost, there were many more that needed saving.
In his dry voice, Darius called out names, and told everyone where they should be. He always did that, even if everything was already written on the schedule.
Everyone leaped to their feet, ready to take on their tasks, including Heat.
“Dane, stay put. Jackpot is filling in for you.”
Everyone except for Heat and Darius left the kitchen.
Heat ran a hand through his hair. “What’s this about? First, you take me off the schedule for the next four days. Now you won’t let me go on a fire run?”
Darius sat in the chair Joe had occupied and aimed his small, round eyes at Heat. “Dane, you’re one of my strongest men. You work damn hard. But I need you to take time off. Tak
e care of yourself. I know what you’re trying to do.”
Heat listened to the sound of boots stomping outside the kitchen as members of his crew hurried out of the station to do his job. He sat back down. “What I’m trying to do? What are you talking about?”
Darius shifted his chair closer to the table. “Dane, I know you don’t want to talk about it, but everyone knows what’s going on. The whole town is talking.” He tapped the butt of his pen on the table. “Now, I don’t know the facts and if you don’t want to talk about it, it’s none of my business. It’s no one’s business. But I know one thing. You’re trying to run away from the pain by working like a dog.” He stood up and pushed the pen into his pocket. “I’m sorry; I can’t give you any more extra shifts. Go home and get some rest.”
Heat slammed the table with his fist, the numbing pain slicing through his hand. “Rest won’t solve the fuckin’ problem,” he said through clenched teeth, then immediately realized he was pouncing at the wrong person. He sighed. He was not usually a short-tempered guy. “I’m sorry, Darius. It’s not your fault. You’re trying to help.” He stood. “I’ll go home.” If too much work was giving him a temper, maybe he should do something about it.
Darius patted him on the back. “You’re doing the right thing. Take as much time as you need.”
“Four days is enough. No more than that.” What would he do with himself for four whole days?
Darius laughed and left the kitchen. “As much time as you need, Dane,” he threw over his shoulder.
Ten minutes later, Heat got into the car and drove away from the station. He would have loved to drive straight to the Lux to see Melisa, but he had promised to give her the time she needed. He didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize the chances of her coming back to him. But there was one thing he could do to keep busy.
When he pulled up in front of Deeno’s Home Supplies, he was confident that renovating the house would distract him from going completely mad.