The Choir Director

by Carl Weber

  I thought about calling Simone, then changed my mind. She probably wouldn’t tell me the truth anyway. But there was one person who just might. I stepped out of my car to head inside but didn’t get far before I heard the bishop calling my name.

  “Mackie?”

  I looked up, and suddenly all thoughts of Simone disappeared from my mind. I had much bigger things to worry about when I saw the man who was now standing with the bishop.

  What the fuck is he doing here? I slowed my pace as I walked toward them. Deacon Frye, fortunately, had gone back into the church. The “he” I was referring to was a short, sloppy, greaseball-looking white man by the name of Andrew Gotti. To say I hated this guy was an understatement.

  “Mackie, this gentleman is looking for you,” Bishop stated as the man approached me.

  I nodded. “Thanks, Bishop. I got it from here. I’ll catch up to you in the church.” I turned to my unexpected visitor. “Let’s talk over here.”

  Bishop Wilson was standing there as if he expected a formal introduction to this pain in the ass. Well, no disrespect to him, but he wasn’t getting one. I placed my hand behind Gotti’s back and guided him away from the bishop.

  “What the fuck are you doing coming around here?” I demanded in a low tone so I wouldn’t be overheard.

  He smirked at me. “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be some kind of man of God? Why the hell are you cursing, and on church grounds, no less?”

  He was trying to bait me, but I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. “What do you want, Gotti?”

  “I’m just checking on you. I heard someone offed themselves around here. I wanted to make sure it wasn’t you.”

  “Well, I’m fine.”

  “That’s good. You’re gonna have everything we asked for by Friday, of course?”

  “Yeah, when have I not? There’s no need for you to come here.”

  He got up in my face. “You don’t get it, do you, Mackie? I’ll go wherever I damn well please when it comes to you. As far as I’m concerned, I’m your cock. Where you go, I go. So unless you want problems with us, you might want to remember that.”

  I didn’t say anything. I just stared at him.

  “I’ll see you Friday. And make sure you have everything we asked for.”

  “I told you I’ll have your stuff.”

  “Good. I’ll see you soon,” he said.

  “Not if I can help it,” I said under my breath as I walked toward the church.

  “Hey, Mackie!” I turned to see what else he wanted. “Me and my wife have been looking for a new church. You never know. Maybe I’ll see you on Sunday too.” He laughed, and I walked into the church wanting to flip him the finger so bad I could taste it.

  Tia

  26

  It was a slow night on my rape hotline, but that didn’t necessarily mean that it was a good thing. Somewhere out there was a woman in need. Maybe she’d been raped tonight, maybe she’d been raped a month ago, but she was hurting inside from the trauma some bastard had given her. I just wished she would call so I could help.

  I glanced over at Aaron, who was sitting next to my desk at a table, waiting to take his first call. I was pleased that he volunteered to help out, but still, I worried that having a man answer a rape hotline might do more damage than good. That’s why I had taken both of the calls that had come in tonight. I explained to him that it would be best if he just observed for a while, to get a feel for the types of conversations he might be engaged in.

  “Thank you for helping me out with the hotline this evening.” I gave him a smile and a thank-you nod. His moral support was truly appreciated.

  “Like I said, watching you in action the other day, man, made me feel like what I’m doing here at the church is little kid’s stuff. You should really be proud of yourself, Tia.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Really, was he kidding me? This man was a musical genius. He had to know that. Or perhaps he was just fishing for a compliment. Either way, he deserved all the compliments he could get. “Aaron, please. What you’ve done for this church? The way you let God use you in song, and then spill that anointing over into us? You have to realize how many souls must get saved because of you.”

  Aaron gave a modest shrug. “I just do what comes natural. Making a woman feel good about herself after she’s been raped, that’s a godsend, a true gift and blessing from the Almighty Himself.”

  If he knew what I’d been through, he’d understand why I was so good at putting myself in these women’s shoes.

  The incoming call line lit up on the phone.

  “Hold on, let me take this call.” I reached for the phone, but Aaron stopped me.

  “Wait, let me take this one.”

  I shifted my eyes in his direction. “You sure?” I asked with uncertainty.

  “Yeah, I think so.”

  I hoped so, because if not, it was too late, as Aaron had already picked up the phone.

  “First Jamaica Ministries rape counseling. How can I help you?”

  Well, he’d gotten that part down anyway.

  Aaron paused and listened intensely. Whatever the caller was saying must have been serious. Aaron’s eyes darted back and forth from the phone to me.

  “Hit the speaker button,” I whispered. Just in case I had to take over the call, I wanted to be knowledgeable of what was being said.

  “And I swear to God, I know it’s all my fault.” I could hear the fragile and shaken voice of a woman on the line. “That’s why I’m going to kill myself.”

  Dear Lord, what was in the water in this city? What was with folks killing themselves?

  Obviously, Aaron must have been thinking something similar. He said to the woman, “Trust me, you don’t want to do that. Someone who belongs to First Jamaica Ministries just killed himself, and you should see the devastation and destruction it left behind. Yeah, he may not be hurting anymore, but now every one of his loved ones is hurting.” Aaron paused for a minute. “You love your family and friends, right?”

  “Yes.” The woman sniffled.

  “Then you wouldn’t want them hurting like you are hurting now … would you?”

  “No,” she answered meekly. “But how can I go on? He raped me and it’s all my fault. I had no business leaving the club with a complete stranger. I asked for it. I deserved it. I have no one to blame but myself.”

  “You have that jerk who raped you to blame,” Aaron shot back. “You’re probably not the first girl he’s done this to. And unless you report the rape to the police, and this guy gets caught and you testify against him, there’s no telling how many other women he may do this to. But if you’re dead, who’s going to be in that courtroom to stand up and speak for all those other women?”

  Aaron continued as if he’d been doing this all his life. I sat back, listening, and took mental notes. He was saying some things that I’d never even thought to say before.

  “Look, the guy who did this to you already feels as though he’s won. He doesn’t even think what he did is wrong. Sometimes people don’t realize what they’re doing is wrong and that they’re hurting somebody unless they’re told. You have to tell him. You have to tell him by reporting him to the police. And then you have to show him that he didn’t win, that you are the winner, by moving on with your life.”

  We both waited with bated breath. I said a quick prayer that his words had touched this woman and saved her life. There was a brief pause, where it sounded like she was drying her tears and regaining her composure, and then my prayer was answered.

  “You’re right. I can’t even believe I was so stupid to think that killing myself would be the answer. That would only make things worse. I’m going to get off the phone and go talk to my mom now.”

  “Yes, that’s a great idea. You’re a very brave and smart girl.”

  “Thank you. Thank you so much.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  “Hey, what’s your name?” she asked.

  “Uh …” Aaron looked
to me to see if it was okay for him to give out his name. I nodded. “It’s Aaron.”

  “Well, thanks, Aaron. You may not realize it, but you just saved my life.”

  When the call ended, both Aaron and I exhaled—loudly.

  “Oh my God. That was crazy,” Aaron said, slumping back in his chair like he’d just run a marathon.

  I just sat there shaking my head.

  “What, did I do something wrong?” He looked worried.

  “For heaven’s sake, no. You were wonderful, Aaron.”

  And he was wonderful—not only a wonderful choir director, but also an altogether wonderful human being. He’d just displayed that in the call. I felt so indebted to him.

  “Thanks. I can’t describe how good it feels to help someone like that. But, man, am I exhausted now!”

  I looked over at the clock. “Well, it’s about time we get going anyway. As a matter of fact, we should have been out of here a half hour ago.” I stood up to get ready to leave. “Hey, have you had dinner yet?”

  “Of course not. I’ve been here with you.” Aaron chuckled.

  “Okay, then how about I treat you to a meal at Carmichael’s Diner? You know, a small token of my appreciation for helping me out.”

  “I don’t have any plans. That sounds great.”

  “You sure? I mean, what about Simone?” I wished I could take back the words as soon as I said them. It wasn’t like me to pry into someone’s personal business, and besides, it wasn’t like I was asking Aaron out on a date.

  “What about Simone?”

  “I don’t know. You tell me.” Shoot! Why was I so interested in this man’s private life, and why couldn’t I control my dang mouth?

  “Well, I would if there was anything to tell. Now, do you want to go eat, or do you want to sit here and starve while we talk about Simone?”

  “Okay, okay, point taken.” I put my hands up in defeat. We locked up and then headed out to the church parking lot.

  “Since it’s your treat, the least I can do is drive,” Aaron suggested.

  “Oh, no, it’s fine. I don’t mind driving.”

  “No, I insist. Besides, there’s this new song I’m thinking about us doing for the national competition that I want you to listen to.”

  I gave in. “Sure.”

  I climbed into Aaron’s SUV and was scared half to death by a loud rapping on the passenger’s side window.

  “What the hell?” A familiar tattooed face was pressed up against the window.

  “What the—” Aaron’s head swiveled around. “Who is that?”

  “Oh my goodness, what is he doing here?” I was so embarrassed I felt like dying.

  The young man continued banging on the window. “What the hell you doing in this nigga’s car?” he demanded. “Get your ass out here. You think I’m gonna put up with this shit?”

  I watched Aaron reach for something on the side of his seat. “Don’t worry. I got this.”

  “No, Aaron, relax. I know him,” I said, blowing air through my teeth. “Look, please take a rain check on dinner tonight.” I reached for the door handle.

  “I can’t let you go with him.”

  “It’s okay. I promise.”

  “Who is that, Tia? Is that your boyfriend or something?”

  I could hear the doubt in Aaron’s voice. He didn’t think this guy would be my type, since I was such a loyal church member in good standing, and I really didn’t have time to explain.

  “It’s complicated, very complicated,” I said, exiting the truck and closing the door.

  I was pulled away from Aaron’s car and dragged toward another one.

  Now I was irate. “Kareem, how could you embarrass me like this?”

  Aaron

  27

  After discovering that the Range Rover parked in Simone’s driveway had belonged to Deacon Smith, I threw myself into my work and avoided her for several days. I wasn’t sure how I felt about the whole thing. I mean, we had a great time together—es-pecially in the bedroom—and I really liked her, so maybe I was afraid to know the truth. If it turned out that he really had been her lover, I didn’t know what I would do with that information.

  When I did finally confront her with what I knew, she offered me only a brief explanation.

  “Look, Aaron, I know it looks bad, but I swear he was only at my house for church business. I just panicked because I didn’t want him to see me with you and get the wrong idea. I have a reputation to uphold as a trustee, and I couldn’t be seen bringing the new choir director home to my house at that time of night, could I? I mean you’ve only been at the church a short time. What would that make me look like?”

  I wanted to comment that the same could be said about a married deacon being parked in her driveway at that hour to discuss “church business,” but she didn’t let me get that far.

  “That’s all I’m going to say about this matter. The man is dead. We should let him rest in peace, don’t you think?”

  And that’s when I knew that Simone and I would never be more than casual sex partners. Obviously there was more to the story than she was admitting. She probably was having an affair with the guy, but I decided that the true details weren’t all that important to me. As long as I understood the level of truth I could expect out of her, then I knew where I stood. I wouldn’t trust her enough to let her be someone special in my life, but hell, I wouldn’t kick her fine ass out of my bed either.

  So, I spent a little time with her, enjoying repeat performances of that first night in her shower, but I was always careful not to let things get too serious. Like always, I was up front about not wanting a commitment. She just laughed it off and told me that sooner or later I’d change my mind. If nothing else, she was confident.

  Just to remind myself to stick to my guns and not get too serious with Simone, I was still seeing Porsche Moore from time to time. Oh, her ghetto ass couldn’t hold a candle to Simone, but she was always available, and the girl gave a helluva blow job.

  In the meantime, I was busy with my choir at the church, which was growing larger by the day. We were now forty members strong, thanks to the great performances we’d been putting on every Sunday. Because everyone wanted to be a gospel star, the new choir members were eager to join. They were also excited about going to the New England gospel sing-off in Connecticut, where the top prize was a hundred thousand dollars. More importantly, attendance at the church had increased exponentially. Things were looking up for me, the choir, and First Jamaica Ministries, and that was a good thing.

  This evening’s rehearsal had ended after we wrapped up a run-through of Kirk Franklin’s song “The Fight of My Life.”

  “Choir members, I thank most of you for being on time, and not on CP time.” I heard a few titters, the culprits knowing who they were. I placed my baton on the pulpit. “Practice is over. You’re dismissed.”

  Most people grabbed their song sheets and started for the door. A few members stood around chitchatting.

  Tia walked up to me and gave me the fist bump Michelle Obama made famous after President Obama’s winning of the primary. I hadn’t seen her since her boyfriend ripped her out of the car the other night. It was kind of an awkward moment, as I really didn’t know whether we should speak about the situation.

  “Aaron, you the bomb,” Tia said with a smile.

  “Thanks, Tia. Uh, listen, I hope I’m not overstepping my boundaries, but, uh …” I leaned in so that no one could hear our business. “Is everything all right? I really didn’t like the way things went down the other night with your boyfriend. That wasn’t cool how dude was manhandling you. If you want me to talk to him, I will. I mean, we’re just friends, and you should be able to have friends without him tripping on you like that.”

  “Yeah, I know, but it wasn’t what it looked like. He’s not my boyfriend. I’d explain it to you now, but I have to go meet a woman for counseling.”

  “This late?” I asked. It was already after eight o’clock in the
evening.

  “Yeah, well, she works late, and on top of that, she has to catch the bus to get here.” Tia looked up at the clock on the wall. “And I’m already late.”

  “Well, perhaps if you could have a talk with some of your fellow choir members who insist on being tardy, I could start on time and get out of here on time.”

  “I know, right? But anyway, I owe you a rain check on that dinner. How about we try it again Sunday after church? Dinner at my place? I’ll explain everything then. That way I can kill two birds with one stone.”

  I was a little hesitant at first. I wasn’t feeling her boyfriend’s behavior. The last thing I needed was to put myself in a position where I’d have another gun pointed at my head.

  Tia could sense my hesitation. “Come on. Don’t be scurred,” she joked. “I promise I’ll protect you.” She smiled and winked.

  Everything about Tia was just so pleasant and carefree. How could I pass up dinner with her? Besides, her filling me in on her boyfriend, I’m sure, was going to make good dinner conversation. “It’s a date. I mean, you know what I mean,” I said with a smile.

  “Yeah, I do.” Tia waved good-bye as she rushed off to her meeting.

  I watched her leave, thinking about how much I’d been enjoying her company lately. Unlike the complicated drama that came along with someone like Simone or Porsche, Tia was sweet and simple. I liked that about her.

  “Man, things are really coming together.” The bishop’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “I knew you were going to do big things, Mackie. Congratulations. Job well done.”

  I was surprised to see him. I guess he was doing an impromptu visit to see how the choir was progressing.

  “Thank you, Bishop. I really appreciate that. But my job is far from over. I still have to bring home the top prize at the nationals.”

  “Stop being so modest, son. With the way the choir ministered the past few Sundays, I’ve already had Tia clear off a space to put the trophy.”