by Iris Morland
“No, it was lost.” So to speak…
“Why did you tell me this?” To Heath’s surprise, anger flared in her expression. “Why tell me something like this when you’ve made it more than clear you don’t want me that way?”
He’d clearly miscalculated. He raked his fingers through his hair. “I never said I didn’t want you. I said that there are things that prevent us from being an us in the first place.”
“What, are you engaged to some Russian princess? You’re actually El Chapo? What kind of secrets does a fifth-grade teacher have, Heath?”
He stifled a bitter laugh. If only you knew. “I’m actually engaged to a Hungarian princess, if you must know.”
“I’ll never understand you. You freak out when you find out I’m dating other men. You pop up and cockblock every guy who gets near me. You kiss me, and then you tell me you kept a lock of my hair.” She shook her head. “Am I crazy, or are you?”
He didn’t have an answer for that, because she was right. He said one thing and did another. It would drive anyone crazy, and Jubilee deserved better than a man who couldn’t give her everything.
“Then I’ll leave you alone,” he said quietly. “The lessons, everything. Clean break, no more of this back-and-forth.”
Jubilee sighed. “You know what’s really crazy? I don’t want to say yes to that. I don’t want this—whatever this is—to end.”
They gazed at each other, a seemingly impenetrable wall between them. Heath considered telling her about his past, about Johnny and Rich, Troy and Gregory, but it was like the words were stuck in his throat. Fear always found a way to be more powerful than logic and honesty. Fear that she would no longer want him at all once she knew the truth.
“I think you should go.” Jubilee moved so she was no longer under the blanket. “I need to think about everything.”
“That’s probably for the best.”
Heath wanted to protest. He wanted to kiss her until they both forgot every objection against them being together. He wanted to remind himself of what was good and lovely in this world, instead of just darkness and lies. Because to him, Jubilee was all that was good.
“Wait.” Jubilee hurried to the door before Heath opened it. “I just—”
Then she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him.
If there was ever an emotional manifestation of tectonic plates shifting, this kiss was it. Jubilee kissed him with an intensity that shocked him and sent desire flaring inside him, but before he could kiss her back, she ended it.
She licked her lips, her breathing only slightly increased. “That’s what I needed to know.”
8
When Rose opened the door, she gave Heath a single long look before stating, “You need a drink. Pronto.”
Heath wouldn’t disagree with that assessment. With a short laugh, he nodded and gratefully took the beer Rose handed him. Callie, Rose’s German shepherd, padded after them both before curling up on her dog bed.
“Heath,” Seth said as he stood up from the living room couch. Seth and Rose had moved into a bigger apartment together recently, although Heath had given Rose a bit of a talking-to about living with a man before marrying him. Rose had countered that this wasn’t the nineteenth century and that she and Seth would get married—eventually.
“Seth. Nice to see you.” Heath and Seth had graduated to an amicable relationship when it had once been more heated. Heath had been protective of Rose after everything she’d gone through, while Seth had been falling in love with Rose and struggling to accept that he’d given his entire heart to her.
Seeing Rose now, Heath had to acknowledge that Seth Thornton was good for her. Rose smiled and laughed, the strain in her features gone, and Seth would often look down at her with a smile just for her.
It was strange, seeing Seth and recognizing some of Jubilee’s features in his. They had the same coloring, which all of the Thornton siblings had, but otherwise, they didn’t really look much alike. But sometimes Heath saw it in the way Seth smiled: he could see Jubilee with that same smile, too.
“Long day at work?” Rose asked Heath. “Did those students of yours finally break you?”
“Not yet. It was a good day at school, actually. Nobody set anything on fire or got into a fight. And everyone seemed to have studied for the history test, which is pretty much a miracle.”
Seth grunted a laugh. “Please, let’s not talk about tests. You’re giving me flashbacks.”
Rose patted his arm. “Don’t worry, we won’t make you write an essay.” A timer dinged from the kitchen right then. “You two go set the table and I’ll get the lasagna.”
Seth and Heath obediently shuffled to the small dining room, setting the table for the three of them as Rose finished cooking.
“You let her cook?” Heath whispered. “And nothing burned down?”
“This time. She’s gotten better, so I’m taking it in stride. You’ll eat every bite and like it, got it?”
“I won’t say a word.”
The lasagna was, admittedly, somewhat underdone, the middle pieces of pasta a bit crunchy, and Heath thought the sauce desperately needed salt. But it was edible, and Rose looked pleased, so everyone ate without complaint.
The food and the conversation weren’t enough to distract Heath from his thoughts, however. After school, he’d gotten a call from the DA’s office about his upcoming testimony against Johnny Porter. Heath had asked about potential retaliation if he did testify, although he couldn’t get into specifics. The DA would contact the police, which would result in Rich more than likely fulfilling his threat against Heath and, even worse, against Rose.
“Baby, what is this?” Seth skewered something on his fork and held it up. “Is this a vegetable?”
Rose peered more closely at the lump covered in red sauce. “Oh, that’s garlic. I didn’t have time to cut it up, so I just put in whole cloves.”
“Huh.” Seth considered the garlic, looked up at Rose’s expectant face, and took a bite, only slightly grimacing. “It’s good,” he lied.
Rose bit her lip and then burst out laughing. “Oh God, it’s terrible, isn’t it? No, don’t keep eating it. Eat the salad instead. It’s from a bag, so I couldn’t ruin it.”
Heath snorted with laughter, and then all three of them were laughing until their eyes watered. Heath went into the kitchen and snagged another bottle of wine as they ate salad and the more edible parts of the lasagna.
“I don’t know why I’m so bad at cooking,” Rose bemoaned. “I’m good at other things. But cooking? I always mess up.”
“Seth could always cook.” Heath smiled at Seth’s dark look.
“I don’t cook because I don’t want to poison anyone.” Seth gave Rose a quick kiss. “I’ll get the dessert. You bought that already baked, didn’t you?”
Rose stuck out her tongue as Seth chuckled. When silence settled on Rose and Heath, she set her chin in her hand and asked, “So, are you going to tell me or just sit there brooding?”
“I never brood.”
“You and Seth brood like nobody I’ve ever met. You should start a club for brooding men. You could get together every Wednesday to sit in the dark and think about your life and your choices.”
Heath smiled, but it felt false. He needed to tell Rose what was going on, if just for her own safety.
“After we finish eating, there is something I need to talk to you and Seth about.”
Rose’s eyebrows winged upward. “That sounds serious. Are you okay?”
No. Yes. Maybe. “I will be.”
Seth came in with a cake that read Happy Birthday Steve on it in red icing.
“Who’s Steve?” Heath asked.
Rose shrugged. “It was on sale. I guess Steve didn’t want to celebrate his birthday, so they put it out for anyone to buy.”
“Too bad for Steve, then.” Seth started cutting pieces and handing them out. “Who doesn’t pick up a birthday cake they ordered?”
“Maybe he was abducted by aliens,” Ros
e offered.
Seth and Rose bantered, each giving more absurd reasons why Steve hadn’t wanted his birthday cake. Heath picked at the cake, the frosting so sweet it made his teeth ache.
Sensing Heath’s mood, Seth and Rose went quiet as they began to clean up dinner. Rose motioned for Heath to follow her into the living room, where Seth joined them some minutes later.
“I wanted to talk to you guys about something,” Heath began. “It’s about Johnny.”
Seth tensed, while Rose paled. With a growl, Seth asked, “What about him?”
“Well, it’s not about him, exactly. It’s Rich.” Heath blew out a breath. “He’s been threatening me if I testify against Johnny.”
Seth and Rose stared at him. Heath could see a vein pulsing in Seth’s forehead, and Heath had a feeling the only reason Seth didn’t explode into a rage was because he needed to stay calm for Rose.
“When did this start?” Seth asked, his voice hard.
Heath told them everything—even about his involvement in Troy’s drug dealing and Gregory’s death.
“I never told you this, Rose, because I thought it was over. And it was my mistake to deal with.”
“Oh, Heath.” Rose took his hands. “You should’ve told me. I’m always here for you, just like you’ve always been there for me.”
Heath pulled his hands away. “That’s the thing: I wasn’t there for you when you needed me. We both know it. If Rich wants to destroy my life, fine. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe from any further threat.”
“You need to go to the police. Talk to my brother Caleb. We can’t let Johnny and his bullshit keep fucking with us,” said Seth.
“I want to. I do. But Rich has threatened to reveal what Rose did. The deal she made with Johnny.” Heath sighed as Rose’s shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to tell you, but I thought you had a right to know.”
Rose wiped her eyes. “No, I’m glad you did. You shouldn’t be going through this alone.” Standing up, she motioned for Seth to stay. “I just need a second, okay?”
Seth watched her go, his expression etched with concern. Water ran in the bathroom, and Heath hoped he’d done the right thing in telling Rose about Rich.
“I’ll keep her safe,” Seth vowed. “I’ll never let those assholes get close to her. Not after what happened this summer.”
Stuck between a rock and a hard place, Rose had met with Johnny, only to have him kidnap her. Heath had been the one to warn Seth of Rose’s disappearance, and Seth had saved Rose in the nick of time.
“I know you will. And I don’t care about my own reputation. But I won’t let Rose get dragged through the mud.”
“I still think you should talk to Caleb. It doesn’t even have to be an official investigation.” Seth blew out a breath. “I don’t want Rose hurt again, either, but if she testifies against Johnny, too, her story will be put out there regardless.”
Heath paled. “I thought she wasn’t going to talk about what Johnny did to her, except for the kidnapping.”
“It’s recommended that she tell everything, although that doesn’t mean the judge will allow the evidence in court.” Seth rubbed his forehead. “What a fucking nightmare.”
Heath’s heart pounded. His mouth dry, he said, “I’ll give Caleb a call. But I’m afraid that smashing one will only cause three more to show up. That’s how Johnny and his crew are: they’re like roaches.”
“Don’t I fucking know it.”
Rose returned then, her eyes red but dry. She sat down next to Seth, and he wrapped an arm around her.
“Heath, whatever you need to do, I support you.” She smiled sadly. “We’ll stop Johnny once and for all.”
Heath’s heart twisted at his sister’s bravery. Taking her hand, he squeezed it, hoping he was doing the right thing for once.
* * *
Jubilee watched as her family chatted and laughed as they waited for dinner to be ready. After much persuasion and nagging, Lisa had gotten all of her children—and their various significant others—to agree to come for family dinner. Jubilee wasn’t sure how they’d all fit, but she shouldn’t have doubted her mother. One of Lisa’s talents was throwing a party.
All of Jubilee’s five siblings were either married or attached. As the youngest, Jubilee knew she shouldn’t feel like the odd one out, but she did. Her brothers and sister were moving on with their lives: marriage, babies, new jobs, new experiences. And what was Jubilee doing?
Working at a bakery. Kissing a man who didn’t want her.
“Oh, the baby kicked.” Sara smiled as she rubbed her very pregnant belly. “He gets active this time of night.”
James, Sara’s eight-year-old son from her first marriage, said, “He’s probably hungry. I’m starving. When are we going to eat?”
“Soon, buddy.” Harrison ruffled James’s hair. “Didn’t you have a sandwich earlier?”
“That was two hours ago.” James rolled his eyes at his stepfather’s obviously stupid question, the adults laughing at his response.
Megan and Caleb were having a baby, too, due in June. Mark, Jubilee’s third-oldest brother, was happily married to Abby. Lizzie and Trent had their daughter, Bea, who was currently on the carpet playing with blocks and laughing at her father’s weird faces. Even Seth, with everything he’d gone through, had found Rose.
Jubilee sighed inwardly. I might not have a boyfriend, but I have my own news. Tonight she’d tell her family about her acceptance to Avila College and her intention to move to Seattle. She knew they would most likely react with surprise and concern.
For so long, Jubilee had been the sick little sister. Sick from chemo, pale and bald and thin. Sick from tests and medications and hospital stays. She’d had two bone marrow transplants—both from Lisa, although Lisa never talked about it—and although she’d been healthy for a decade now, it was like that memory of her being sick had yet to disappear from her family’s collective memory.
Rose whispered something into Seth’s ear before getting up to sit beside Jubilee. Jubilee forced herself to smile, even though it was difficult to look at Heath’s sister without seeing Heath.
“The first time Seth brought me here, I almost peed my pants,” Rose confided. “Your parents are terrifying.”
Jubilee laughed. “You don’t have to tell me that. All of my siblings give our mom a wide berth. Our dad isn’t as bad, though.”
“The first time we met, she asked me about my entire life and choices. ‘Where did you go to school? What are your political beliefs? What are your thoughts on public schooling versus private?’” Rose’s eyes widened comically. “I think I said something about private schools being totally fine for rich people. Oops.”
Lisa was chatting with Lizzie right then, probably asking Lizzie everything about Bea. Lisa meant well—usually. To Jubilee, she’d been an attentive, protective parent who’d been at her side through every treatment and hospital stay. To her siblings, Lisa was overbearing and meddling. It wasn’t until Jubilee was older that she’d realized her brothers and sister had a very different idea of the woman who’d raised them all.
“Did you know my mom was my bone marrow donor?” Jubilee didn’t know why she was saying this now, of all times, but sometimes she felt the need to defend Lisa. To show another side of her that wasn’t the one that tried to keep Harrison and Sara apart for seemingly shallow reasons.
“No, I didn’t. Seth told me you had leukemia as a kid.”
“I did. Twice. When I was five, then at thirteen.” Jubilee smiled wryly. “It sucked.”
“To say the least.”
“But you know what sucked the most?”
“What?”
“The fact that my family wrapped me up in a cocoon and hasn’t let me out since.” Jubilee tried to mask the bitterness in her voice, but it crept through. “Now I’m twenty-five and I’ve done nothing with my life.”
Rose bumped her shoulder against Jubilee’s. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’
ll get there.” In a lower voice, she added, “And for what it’s worth, I’ve told my brother he’s an idiot.”
Jubilee felt a blush creeping up her cheeks. Had Heath talked to his sister about her? How embarrassing. The last thing Jubilee needed was her entire family knowing what was going on with Heath.
At dinner, Jubilee ate in silence, trying to find the right moment to announce her news. Her palms sweaty and her heart pounding, she waited until there was a brief beat of silence before clearing her throat.
“I have some news,” she said.
Her family turned toward her, almost like they were surprised she’d spoken at all.
“What is it?” Lisa asked.
Megan gave Jubilee an encouraging smile, since she already knew Jubilee’s news. You can do this. It’ll be fine.
“I got into Avila College. I’m going to move to Seattle after New Year’s.”
No one said a word at first. Harrison frowned at Jubilee across the table, while Lisa looked like she’d just found a rotten fish sitting on her dining room table. Dave Thornton, for his part, finally broke the silence. “Where will you live?” he asked.
Jubilee hadn’t gotten that far yet. “I’ll probably find someone who needs a roommate, or sublet. I’m working on that.”
“Seattle, though? Jubi, you’ve never lived in a big city. How will you get around? What happens if you get lost?” Lisa asked.
“She has a car, Mom,” Caleb interjected. He patted Jubilee on her shoulder. “Great job, kiddo. What are you going to study?”
“I’m focusing on general education for now, but I think I’d like to apply for veterinary school.”
At that announcement, the entire table erupted with questions, some more supportive than others. Jubilee couldn’t help but notice that Lisa had fallen silent, except for the occasional shake of her head as she finished her meal.
When the family returned to the sitting room after dinner, Harrison pulled Jubilee aside. “Are you sure about this? You’ve never been on your own.”
“I’ll be fine. It’s Seattle, not Mars.”
“That being said, what about doing online classes? You haven’t been in school for a while. Managing classes and living on your own is a huge step.”