A Place of Peace

by Amy Clipston

  Miriam squeezed his hand and smiled. “Danki. I appreciate your faith.”

  “It’s the truth.”

  She released his hand and took another sip. “You have the most astounding faith. I always admired that quality in you.”

  “You did?” He raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “I thought you once said I was moodier than the weather.”

  She laughed, and it was sweet music to his ears, like his favorite hymn. “Ya, you are the moodiest person I know, but you also are the most faithful. The faith outshines the moods.”

  He grinned. “That’s good to know.” He felt a surge of confidence in her feelings for him. “What else do you admire about me?”

  Her cheeks flushed again. “Oh, there are many things —your sense of humor, your laugh, your carpentry skills, your heart.” Her eyes were intense and locked on his. “What about you? What do you admire about me?”

  “Everything,” he said.

  They stared at each other in silence for a moment, much like they had when they spoke last week at the wedding. Again, he wished he could read her thoughts.

  A young boy skipped into the room and stood in front of the candy machine, studying the selections before choosing a chocolate bar. When he left, the intense moment between Timothy and Miriam had evaporated. Her eyes were casual again while she sipped her drink.

  “How do you think Hannah and Aaron are doing?” he asked, hoping to keep the conversation going.

  Miriam shook her head and frowned. “It’s difficult to say. We went down to the cafeteria earlier and ate. We talked quite a bit. When we came back up to the waiting room, they seemed to need to be alone. I walked over to the window to give them some privacy. Hannah said she wanted me here to give her strength, and I hope I’m giving her all the support she needs.”

  “I think just being here gives her strength. You really don’t need to do or say anything in particular.”

  “I’ll do my best, but it’s not easy.” Tears filled her eyes. “I can’t imagine how we’d make it if something bad happened to Lena Joy. It would be a nightmare.”

  He squeezed her hand. “Don’t think about that. God will see her through this. I just know it.” It warmed his heart seeing how much she loved her niece. She would be a wonderful mother.

  “Danki.” Her lips formed a sweet, genuine smile, and his pulse raced. “I’m glad you’re here.”

  “Me too,” he said. He took a deep breath. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  “Oh?” she asked, her eyes full of curiosity.

  “Naomi broke up with me today.”

  “She what?” Miriam looked confused. “What do you mean? You’re engaged.”

  “We were engaged. Today she saw how concerned I was about you when I found out about the transplant, and she said she had to let me go. She said it was obvious I wanted to be here with you, and it wasn’t God’s will for her to marry me.”

  Miriam studied his expression. “She did?”

  “Ya, she did.” He contemplated her eyes in return, again wishing he could read her thoughts. “What about you and Zach?”

  “What about us?” Miriam gave him a confused expression.

  “Aren’t you courting him?”

  “No, I’ve never courted him. We’ve always been good friends. He’s courting my sister, but they’re trying to keep it a secret.”

  He let out a sigh of relief. “Really? I was certain you were courting him.”

  “No.” She waved him off. “We’ve never been more than friends—ever. In fact, Lilly has always been in love with him, which is why she was jealous of me and determined to break up you and me. It made her crazy that he was close friends with me and never showed any interest in her.”

  He ran his fingers over the cool bottle of Coke. “Lilly apologized to me about a month ago. I went to see you after she told me the story, but your aenti told me you were out with Zach. She said I needed to be with Naomi because you were with Zach.”

  “No!” Miriam cupped her hand to her mouth. “Aenti Edna told you that?”

  He nodded. “I asked her not to tell you I’d visited you because I didn’t want to interfere with you and Zach.”

  Frowning, Miriam shook her head. “She had it all wrong. I was never seeing Zach. In fact, the last time I had supper with him, I encouraged him to see Lilly. I told him I only wanted to be his friend.”

  Timothy shook his head in disbelief. How could he have had it all so very wrong? He stared into Miriam’s eyes until she glanced at the clock on the wall.

  “We better head back and check on them,” she said, standing.

  28

  Miriam longed to take Timothy’s hand in hers while they walked back to the waiting room. Her mind whirled with questions and a storm of emotions.

  Timothy and Naomi had broken up.

  Naomi encouraged Timothy to come and be with Miriam.

  What did it all mean? Did Timothy want to be with Miriam?

  The questions echoed in her mind when they approached Hannah and Aaron. She pushed the confusing questions aside and focused on her sister and brother-in-law. She needed to concentrate on being their support and not on her jumbled feelings for Timothy.

  As Hannah had predicted, she’d fallen asleep, leaning against her husband.

  Miriam mouthed the words, “Do you need anything?”

  Smiling, Aaron shook his head.

  Timothy took Miriam’s arm and nodded toward a sofa on the other side of the waiting room near a television displaying the nightly news. He led her to it, and they sat together on the small sofa.

  He looped his arm around her shoulder, and she sucked in a breath at the feeling of his body heat mixing with hers. She wondered if he enjoyed being close to her as much as she did. She squelched the urge to lean into his side and enjoy the feel of his muscular torso.

  Instead, she kept a fraction of an inch between their bodies and stared at the television. Although television was forbidden by the bishop, she knew the circumstance would allow it.

  Miriam stared at the screen, but the news anchor’s words didn’t reach her ears. She was deep in thought, wondering what Timothy was feeling as he watched the newscast. Was he thinking of her or was he interested in the latest developments in the surrounding geographical area?

  An hour wore on, and she found herself leaning into Timothy’s chest while he rubbed her arm with the hand looped over her shoulder. Being close to him felt so natural and so right. Did he feel the same way?

  Her thoughts were interrupted by Aaron standing in front of the television set. “I just talked to the nurse. Lena Joy is doing well. They’ve removed her liver and are beginning to transplant the new one.”

  “Praise God!” Miriam hopped up. “How’s Hannah?”

  “Doing fine.” Aaron smiled. “She’s on the phone with Lilly. I’m going to call my parents after she’s done. We’ve got to update everyone.”

  Timothy stood and patted Aaron’s arm. “I’m so glad it’s going well. Do you need anything? A snack or a drink?”

  “I think we may make a trip down to the cafeteria when we’re done with the phone calls. Danki.” Aaron crossed the waiting room to Hannah.

  Miriam squeezed Timothy’s arm. “I think she’s going to do fine. I just feel it in my soul.”

  “Ya, me too. Do you want to go for a walk?” He pushed a lock of hair back from her face, and the warmth of his touch tingled in the pit of her belly.

  She nodded. “That would be nice instead of watching television.”

  He took her hand, and her heart leapt in her chest. They walked around the hospital for nearly an hour, and he talked about work, telling her about the projects he’d been creating and how busy the shop had been so far this fall.

  When they returned to the waiting room, they sat with Hannah and Aaron and made idle conversation about people they knew.

  After a while, Hannah and Aaron headed to the cafeteria to get a snack, and Miriam and Timothy sat by the television, wai
ting for news on Lena Joy.

  When Aaron and Hannah returned, Miriam and Timothy went down to the cafeteria and ate a snack. They returned to the waiting room and found Hannah on the cell phone.

  Miriam rushed over to Aaron. “Did you get news?”

  He nodded, tears filling his dark eyes. “The transplant is almost complete. They’re almost finished hooking up the new liver.”

  Miriam cupped her hand to her mouth.

  “Praise God!” Timothy said. “Everything is going well?”

  Aaron wiped a tear from his eye. “It looks gut.”

  Hannah snapped the phone shut and rushed over to Miriam, hugging her. “It’s almost complete, Miriam! My baby is going to have a new liver.”

  “I’m so froh.” Miriam held her sister as she cried. “God is gut.”

  “Ya, He is,” Hannah said. “I can’t wait to see her. These last couple of hours are going to be torture.”

  “We’ll get through it.” Aaron pulled Hannah into a hug. “We’ll see her soon.”

  Miriam glanced up at Timothy and smiled. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

  “Me too.” He touched her cheek, and she thought she might melt at the tenderness of the gesture.

  Why is he truly here?

  Does he still love me?

  Could there be a chance that we get together again—maybe forever this time?

  The questions continued to tease her while they sat in front of the television for the next couple of hours. Tedious situational comedies droned on from the flat screen, but Miriam hardly noticed.

  She was deep in thought, alternating between prayers for Lena Joy and thoughts of Timothy. She was determined to crack the riddle of Timothy Kauffman, who sat beside her, holding her hand and rubbing her arm. He seemed to be more than a friend, but she was perplexed by his behavior. Were they starting over as a couple or did he just want to be friends?

  As the hour wore on, Miriam found herself yawning.

  “You can take a nap,” Timothy whispered in her ear, the tickle of his voice in her ear sending chills down her spine. “Just use me as a pillow, like Aaron said to Hannah earlier.”

  She tilted her head, enjoying his deep blue eyes. “You certain?”

  He ran his fingertip down her cheekbone, and she closed her eyes, enjoying the touch. “I don’t mind at all,” he said. “Close your eyes, so you’re refreshed when it’s time to visit the patient with her new liver.”

  She smiled. “Okay.” Leaning into him, she inhaled his musky scent, losing herself in sweet memories of their past. She longed to relive the taste of his kisses.

  The reality of the situation roused her from her fantasies. Timothy Kauffman was no longer her boyfriend. Years had passed since the treasured days of their courtship. But she couldn’t help but wonder where she stood in his heart now. Being with him felt so natural.

  But did he feel it too?

  She closed her eyes and soon relaxed.

  Miriam awoke with a start to Timothy’s voice in her ear.

  “Wake up, sleepyhead,” he whispered. “The surgery is over.”

  Miriam sat up and rubbed her eyes. “It’s over? How long have I been asleep?”

  “Almost three hours.” He pushed her loose strands of hair back under her kapp. “You must’ve been exhausted.”

  She cupped her hand to her mouth to cover a yawn. “I guess so.” She scanned the waiting room for Hannah. “Where’s my sister?”

  “She and Aaron were called back by a nurse. I guess they’re going to see Lena Joy.” He stretched and then grinned, causing her heart to thump due to his handsome face. “My arm’s asleep. You were leaning on it.”

  “I’m sorry.” Her cheeks heated.

  “I didn’t mind at all.” His expression changed to a frown as he glanced across the waiting room. “There they are. They don’t look froh.”

  Miriam stood and gasped when she spotted Hannah, sobbing while Aaron held her. Her blood ran cold. “Oh no,” she said. “It can’t be. She has to be okay.”

  “Don’t jump to conclusions.” Timothy pulled her to him. “Let’s wait and see what they say. Remember, keep your faith.”

  “'Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see,'” she whispered.

  “That’s exactly right,” Timothy said.

  Aaron caught Miriam’s eye, and he gestured for them to join them on the other side of the waiting room.

  “Be strong,” Timothy whispered as he put his arm around her shoulder and led her to them.

  Miriam took a deep breath, but her confidence broke when Hannah met her gaze. When Miriam saw the despair in her eyes, she began to cry.

  Hannah opened her arms, and Miriam fell into her hug.

  “They can’t wake her up,” Hannah said between sobs. “My baby went to sleep, and she won’t wake up.”

  “Oh, Hannah,” Miriam held onto her and sobbed. “Oh no.”

  Miriam held her until Hannah pulled back and wiped her eyes.

  “I can’t believe it. The doctor said the surgery went well.” Hannah swiped more tears, despite the continuous flow from her eyes. “The doctor said it’s rare that this happens, but she had some reaction to the anesthesia. My worst fears came true. How could this happen? How?”

  “She’ll pull through,” Aaron said, rubbing her arm. “Our dochder is strong. You have to believe that. You must trust God.” He wiped his own tears.

  Miriam bit her lip to hold back more sobs. “He’s right. Remember what I said earlier about faith. God is going to see Lena Joy through this. You have to believe it. He gave her the perfect liver. He won’t let it go to waste.”

  Hannah held onto her husband and sobbed.

  Miriam covered her mouth to swallow her own tears, and Timothy pulled her to him. They stood in silence until a nurse appeared and called Hannah and Aaron back into the recovery room.

  “Do you want to go for a walk?” Timothy asked after Hannah and Aaron disappeared through the doors.

  Miriam shook her head. “I have to stay here in case Hannah comes back with more news. I need to know that Lena Joy is okay.”

  He took her hand and led her to a sofa near the doors. “Let’s sit here then. There’s no need to stand.”

  Miriam sank down beside him, and he held her in his arms. They sat in a comfortable silence, and Miriam was thankful to not have to make idle conversation while they waited for more news of her niece.

  She silently prayed, begging God to bring Lena Joy back, healthy with her new liver. She believed Aaron’s words that God wouldn’t have given her the perfect liver and then not let her survive the surgery. It just wouldn’t have made sense for her to receive the liver and then …

  She couldn’t think the word. No, she refused to. She silently continued repeating the verse that had haunted her thoughts all day long.

  Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

  When Aaron approached them an hour later, his eyes held hope, which she hadn’t seen earlier. Miriam and Timothy stood, and Miriam held her breath, praying for good news.

  “She’s awake,” he said. When he smiled, Miriam squealed and hugged him.

  “She’s okay?” Miriam asked.

  “Ya.” Aaron held onto her. “She’s fine. In fact, she was joking with us, saying that the liver felt too big.”

  “Oh, praise Jesus!” Miriam laughed as tears spilled down her hot cheeks. “I knew she’d pull through. I just knew it.”

  Miriam stepped back, and Timothy squeezed Aaron’s arm.

  “I’m so glad,” Timothy said.

  “When can we see her?” Miriam asked.

  “It will be a little while. You can go get something to drink if you’d like,” Aaron said. “Only Hannah and I can be back there since we’re her parents. Other relatives have to wait until she’s more stable.” He touched Miriam’s arm. “But she’s doing well. The liver is working. The doctor said it will take a while, but in a day or so, her ski
n will be pink. She looks great.”

  Miriam held Timothy’s hand. “It’s a miracle.”

  Aaron held up the cell phone. “I’m going to make some calls and spread the news, and then I’m going to go back in and see her.”

  “Come out in a bit and give us an update,” Timothy said.

  “I will.” Aaron headed over to a quiet corner. “Danki for being here.”

  Miriam looked up at Timothy. “It’s a miracle! A miracle!”

  His stare was intense, and her heart thumped in her chest. He leaned down and when she felt his breath on her lips, she froze.

  His lips brushed hers, sending her heart into hyper-speed. He pulled her close, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. His lips continued to explore hers, and she closed her eyes, delighting in the feel of his warm mouth.

  He pulled back, and his smile was wide. “I love you,” he said.

  She reached up and touched his cheek. “I love you too,” she whispered. “I always have.”

  His eyes brightened. “You have?”

  “Ya, I never stopped.” She smiled.

  “Does that mean we still have a chance, you and me?” His eyes were full of hope.

  “Ya, I think we do.” A new confidence surged through her. “I think God is giving us a second chance, just like he’s giving Lena Joy a second chance with the new liver.”

  He nodded. “Ya, I think you’re right.”

  “When Jeremy died, I felt like I’d lost everything,” she said, taking his hands in hers. “I was sure you were seeing someone else behind my back and then my family turned against me. I moved to Indiana because I thought I belonged in the English world. I also thought God had forgotten about me. But now that I’m back, I’ve found that God doesn’t forget about any of us. I saw Colleen Henderson a few months ago, and she has a new baby.”

  Timothy’s face lit up with a smile. “She does?”

  “Ya, her baby girl, Deanna Nicole, is a little over eighteen months old now, and she’s perfect in every way. The Hendersons lost Jeremy, but they have new life in their new baby.” She squeezed his hands. “Just like Jesus rose from the dead to give us new life, He brings new life to us in different ways, like Lena Joy’s organ transplant.”