“Fuck you,” I mutter without any real feeling behind it. He’s right.
“Nah, you’re not my type,” he responds. “Thanks for the heads-up, man. I’m gonna catch a few more hours’ sleep before I have to get Brynna and the girls.”
“Okay. Thanks. I’ll see you later.”
I hang up and turn down the windy road that leads to the training compound that I now work out of.
The only good thing about getting out of the Navy is now being self-employed. I choose my hours with Redwire, the independent civilian contractor that works with the military in war zones. I’ve been training their newbies in weaponry and marksmanship for a few months. They know that I’m one of the best in the field, which is why I make way more money now than I ever did as a SEAL.
Men and women in the military are pitifully underpaid.
Another bonus of this particular job is working with men who were either on my SEAL team, or were experts in other branches of the military.
Only the best of the best work here.
The training compound is twenty minutes south of Seattle in a remote area, away from businesses and neighborhoods. I park my car and walk into the main building to get my mail and check in with the owner.
“What’s up, Montgomery?” Jim Peterson nods from his office. He and I were on SEAL Team 5 together ten years ago. He’s a scary man when he wants to be and knows his shit.
“Hey, man,” I respond and shake his hand. “Sorry to leave you shorthanded.”
He shrugs. “It’s fine. Markinson is taking the classes on the days you’re out. He’s not as good as you, but we’re muddling through.”
“Thanks.”
He nods once and points to the chair in front of his desk. “Have a seat.”
“Why do I feel like I’m being called to the principal’s office?” I smirk as I sit and cross one ankle over the opposite knee.
“How are things?” he asks, his face serious.
“Fine.”
“Bullshit,” he counters.
I sigh deeply and scrub my hands over my face. “Do I look that bad?”
“Worse,” he responds with a laugh. “I haven’t seen you look this shitty since Colombia.” His smile fades as we stare at each other, remembering the particularly dangerous mission in Colombia almost a decade ago, when we were supposed to rescue three American women who were being held hostage by a Colombian drug cartel.
The mission was FUBAR before we ever set boots on Colombian soil.
“Nightmares.” I sigh and shrug, and Peterson nods in understanding.
“There are people to talk to about that, you know.”
I shrug and exhale. “I’m okay. I’ve been doing better. Last night was just rough.”
He stares at me for a long moment. “Okay. Have you talked to Kramer lately?” he asks, mercifully changing the subject. Kramer is another former teammate who also lives in the area and trains military working dogs for SEALs now.
“Not in a while. What’s up?” I ask.
“He has to leave town for about a month for an assignment. He needs to find a place for Bix while he’s gone.”
“How is Bix?” I ask and grin as I think of the dog. Loyal, fearless and one of the best sailors I’ve had the pleasure of working with.
“He’s good. He’s not deployable.” Peterson grimaces and shakes his head. “But he’s good. Do you think you could take him for a few weeks?”
“I’ll see what I can do. I’d better get out to the guys.” I stand and shake his hand. “Thanks, sir.”
“You’re welcome, Chief.”
***
~Brynna~
“Show me,” Matt commands from behind the steering wheel as I settle in the passenger seat.
“Show you what?” I ask.
He cocks an eyebrow and watches me with those amazing Montgomery blue eyes, hands laced and resting in his lap.
“I won’t ask again,” he murmurs calmly and never breaks eye contact with me.
It’s unnerving.
I cast my eyes down and pull my red turtleneck away from my throat, showing him the bruises and then quickly replace it and pull my seat belt on.
“How did you know?” I ask, not meeting his gaze.
He starts the car, throws it into gear, and zooms out of the parking lot with more force than I expect, given his calm demeanor.
“Caleb called me,” he responds quietly and glances over at me. “Talk to me.”
“I’m fine.”
“Talk to me.”
His voice is firm, not to be reckoned with. I sigh in defeat and sag in the seat, dropping my face in my hands.
“It was horrible,” I whisper. “Scared me.”
He rests his hand on my thigh and squeezes reassuringly. “Has he had nightmares with you before?”
“Never,” I reply immediately, shaking my head adamantly. “He sleeps hard. Soundly.”
“Really?” Matt asks, looking at me in surprise. “He hasn’t slept well in a long time.”
“He hasn’t had an issue with me,” I reply. “Until last night. But it was…different.”
“Different how?” he asks.
“He had fallen asleep on the couch, watching war shows on the History channel. When I woke up, I heard gunfire and cannons and Caleb was in the middle of the nightmare.”
“So it didn’t come on while he was in bed with you.” He downshifts the Jeep as we turn onto the street where the girls go to school.
“No, he was on the couch.”
“Interesting.”
I turn and watch Matt silently. He’s in a white button-down and jeans, his pistol resting in a holster on his hip. His light brown hair is in need of a trim, and he didn’t shave today, leaving a light stubble on his chin.
His left elbow is resting on the door, and he’s rubbing his fingers over his lips.
“How did you wake him up?” he asks.
“I kneed him in the thigh,” I respond.
He winces and chuckles ruefully. “That’ll do it.” He grins at me and then sobers. “How do you feel today?” he asks softly.
“My voice was a bit hoarse this morning, but other than that, I feel fine.”
“Don’t be obtuse, Bryn. How do you feel?”
He’s just not going to cut me a break.
“Exhausted. Relieved.” I swallow and stare down at my knees. “So in love with him I can’t see straight,” I whisper.
“Look at me.”
My eyes find his as he offers me a gentle smile. “I think you’ll be really good for each other. Give it time.”
I nod just as the girls come running to the car.
“Hi, Mom!” Josie calls and scoots in to buckle her seat belt.
“Hi, Matt.” Maddie grins as she joins her sister.
“Hi, guys.” I smile back at them as Matt pulls away from the school and heads toward home.
“How was your day?” Matt asks.
“Caleb hurt Mommy last night,” Josie responds.
I gasp and stare back at her with my jaw dropped.
“He did?” Matt asks and shakes his head slightly at me, telling me to not respond and let him handle it.
Just kill me now.
“Yeah, he wouldn’t let her up off the floor,” Josie says.
“He didn’t mean to!” Maddie jumps in to defend Caleb. “It was a bad dream.”
Josie shakes her head stubbornly. “He hurt her.”
“Do you think he did it on purpose?” Matt asks her calmly.
Josie shrugs and folds her arms over her chest stubbornly.
“Answer my question, please.” Matt’s voice is authoritative and strong. Typical cop.
“I don’t know,” she replies with a frown. “It was scary.”
“I’m sure it was, sweetheart,” Matt murmurs. “Do you know what nightmares are, Josie?”
“Bad dreams?”
“Yes, they’re really bad dreams,” he affirms.
“Remember not very long ago when yo
u came crying into my room because you had a dream that you couldn’t find me, sweetie?” I ask her and watch her big brown eyes fill with tears.
“Yeah, I was really sad.” She sniffs.
“Caleb was having a really bad dream like that, honey, except he thought he was in danger. He thought someone was trying to hurt him.” Matt watches Josie in the rearview mirror closely.
“Who was trying to hurt him?”
“Bad people,” Matt replies. “He used to have to go to places that had bad people in them who wanted to hurt him and his friends, so he could help people who needed him.”
“So, that’s what he was dreaming about?” Josie asks with wide, tear-filled eyes.
“Yes, honey,” I reply and rub her leg with my palm.
“Oh,” she whispers and looks down. “But I was scared that he was hurting you.”
“Me, too,” Maddie admits. “But he was scared, too.”
“Damn,” Matt whispers under his breath and shakes his head. “I’m so sorry you all had to see that.”
“You wouldn’t hug him today,” Maddie accuses Josie.
“Hey, it’s okay,” I interrupt before a fight blows out of hand. “You can give him a hug tonight if you want.”
Josie just nods and looks down at her hands as Matt pulls into our driveway.
“Looks like I don’t need to stay long,” he murmurs, eyes trained on Caleb just about to climb out of his own car. “He’s home early.”
“Yeah, he is. I wasn’t expecting him home for another hour, at least.”
Matt parks behind him, and the girls climb out of the car with their backpacks. Caleb looks at us hesitantly and then opens the back door of his car and whistles.
A big, beautiful dog bounds out, much to the delight of my daughters, who begin jumping up and down and clapping their hands, wide smiles across their faces.
“And, that’s my cue to leave.” Matt smiles at me, nods at Caleb, and leaves us all standing in the driveway.
“Sit,” Caleb commands softly, and the dog immediately sits at Caleb’s side, not moving, looking up at him for his next command.
“Who is this?” I ask with one eyebrow raised.
“This is Captain Bix.” Bix’s tail wags once at the sound of his name. “He’s a retired Navy SEAL, and he needs a home for a few weeks while his handler is out on assignment.”
“Can we pet him?” Maddie asks, her body vibrating in anticipation as much as Josie’s.
Bix glances longingly at my little girls and then back up at Caleb, waiting to be told what to do.
“Please?” Josie asks.
“Sure.” Caleb smiles. “Go ahead,” he tells Bix, who happily jogs to the girls, and they all collapse in a pile of elation, the girls rubbing him and talking to him as though they’ve known him for years.
“What happened to his eye?” Josie asks as she kisses his cheek.
One of the dog’s eyes is permanently shut, like he’s always winking, and the ear on the same side is slightly deformed.
Caleb looks up at me with serious eyes. “Bix was a dog that sniffed around for things that might blow up.” He swallows and turns his gaze back to the dog. “He got injured while he was working and lost his eye and hurt his ear, too, so he can’t work anymore.”
“Oh, poor Bix!” Maddie throws her arms around the dog and hugs him tightly. “Can he stay here, Mom?”
“This is sabotage,” I hiss at Caleb. “You can’t ask me if the most noble and adorable dog in the world can stay with us when my girls are already in love with him.”
“What kind of dog is he?” Josie asks and giggles as Bix gives her doggie kisses on her cheek.
“He’s a Belgian shepherd. He’s been trained to be a working dog since he was three days old.”
“Wow!” Josie exclaims.
Caleb walks closer to me and drapes his arm across my shoulders.
“Taking on the responsibility of a dog is a lot right now, Caleb.”
“He’s the best-trained dog you’ll ever meet, Legs. He’s fearless, obedient and one hundred percent professional.”
I glance over and bust out laughing to find Bix flat on his back, paws in the air, tongue hanging out of his smiling mouth and relishing a good belly rub from two eager six-year-olds.
“Yes, I can see that he’s perfectly professional.”
“He has to stay, Mom,” Josie calls out. “He’s a hero, like Caleb!”
Caleb looks shell-shocked as he turns me to face him. “He’s an amazing dog, Bryn, and a helluva team member. It would make me feel better knowing he’s here. Nothing will get to them with Bix watching.”
“Sabotage,” I whisper and grudgingly smile at the girls as they giggle and roll on the driveway with the big fluffy canine. “I guess he can stay.”
“Thank you, Mom!” Maddie calls out.
“Come,” Caleb commands, and Bix jumps up and leaves the girls behind to stand next to Caleb. “Say hello to Brynna.”
He barks once and smiles at me, that tongue flopping out again.
“Hello,” I murmur and pat his head and then give in and squat next to him and rub his face. “You’re a sweet boy, aren’t you?”
***
“But we aren’t tired,” Maddie protests as she yawns widely.
Caleb throws a large dog bed on the floor between the girls’ beds and points to it. Bix lies on the bed, watching us with one raised ear and both eyebrows moving up and down as he looks side to side at each of the girls.
“Why can’t he sleep with us?” Josie asks and stares longingly at her new best friend.
“He sleeps on his own bed,” Caleb replies and sits at her side. “Hey, jelly bean, I’m sorry you’re mad at me today. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.”
I sit at Maddie’s bedside and watch my daughter’s internal struggle as Caleb watches her closely.
“Mom always says sweet dreams when it’s time for bed,” she tells Caleb softly. Bix lets out a long sigh as he lowers his head to his paws, and Josie watches him with a smile. “I hope you have sweet dreams, Caleb, and no more scary ones.”
I bite my lip and hug Maddie tightly, as Caleb silently holds his hands out to Josie. She climbs readily into his lap and hugs him, then scampers off to snuggle into the covers.
“Good night, Mama,” Maddie whispers.
“Good night, baby girl.”
Bix raises his head and watches Caleb move to the doorway.
He stops and looks back at the dog. “Stay, Bix. Stay with the girls.”
With that, Bix lowers his head again, and Caleb turns out the light, leaving only the light from the princess night-light in the wall, and shuts the door behind us.
“I can’t believe you talked me into a dog.” I chuckle and lead the way down the stairs to the living room.
“He’s already proven that he’s well trained,” he responds with a grin, referring to the numerous times the dog pressed his nose to the sliding glass door, asking to be let out.
“Thank goodness,” I agree and lower myself to the couch. Caleb sits beside me, but keeps at least two feet between us. “Oh, you wanna rub my feet? Here you go.” I lay my feet in his lap and grin at him.
“I don’t recall offering to do that,” he mutters with a half smile, already digging his thumb into the arch of my foot, earning a moan of appreciation.
“Oh sweet Moses, that feels good.”
The heel of my foot is resting against his crotch, and I feel his cock stir.
“Don’t start,” he warns.
“Why not?” I ask and rub the ridge in his pants with my foot.
“I’m not ready, Legs.” He clenches my foot in his hand and then returns to rubbing it again.
“Uh, Caleb, we’ve been having sex for a few weeks now.” I frown at him and am shocked to see color spread up this cheeks.
He stops rubbing my foot and turns his blue gaze to mine, his eyes ice blue and angry as hell.
Chapter Twelve
“What?” I ask an
d frown at him.
“How can you be so normal?” he asks, staring at me with those amazing eyes.
“What are you talking about?” I ask and pull my feet away, tucking them under me.
“I could have killed you last night, Brynna.”
I sigh and hang my head in my hands, so frustrated with him. “Is this why you won’t touch me?”
“Damn right,” he confirms with a firm nod.
“Caleb, you’re being ridiculous.” I lower my hands and look up to find him watching me like I’ve just produced a second head.
“Brynna, I’ve snapped necks without giving it a second thought. I have that in me. I had my hand”—he holds his large hand up for me to see—“wrapped around your tiny neck and was squeezing the life out of you, and all you’ve done today is be sweet and nice and fucking normal. Nothing about this is normal!”
“No, it’s not normal, Caleb, but it wasn’t on purpose, damn it!” I lean in and grip his forearm, holding on to him tightly. “You would never hurt me, babe.”
“I’m capable of it.” He shakes his head and sighs.
“No. You’re. Not.”
He refuses to look me in the eye, and he’s really starting to irritate me.
“Look at me.”
He shakes his head no, staring down at my hand, and I don’t know why but he just pisses me right off. I stand up and stomp away, up the stairs to my bedroom and into the bathroom. I have the urgent need to slam a door, but I don’t want to wake the girls.
“All right, Legs, why are you so pissed?” Caleb asks from the doorway of the bathroom, watching me, arms crossed over his chest.
“Because you’re so damn stubborn!” I turn away from him and lean against the bathroom sink, head bowed. “I don’t know what to say to make you understand that you didn’t do it on purpose, and that I’m fine.”
“I’m just so damn afraid of hurting you,” he murmurs, making me whirl to face him.
“Not touching me hurts me.” I lean my hips against the sink and cross my arms, mirroring him. “Not making love to me hurts me. Being tender and sweet to my girls and then backing away from me hurts me.”
“I want to touch you so fucking badly it’s killing me,” he whispers, his eyes closed and jaw clenched.
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