A Kiss by Candlelight

by Joanna Mansell

  She decided to go up to bed before this place really started to get to her. Perhaps she would cope with it a little better in the morning, when the sun was shining and she could see the mainland again. Right now, she felt as if she was stuck in the middle of nowhere!

  She reached the foot of the stairs just as Nicholas ambled out of the lounge. For some reason, the sight of him immediately unsettled Cathryn. Flustered for no good reason that she could think of, she launched straight into what she thought would be a safe topic of conversation.

  ‘I’m rather worried about your brother’s car. Is it safe to leave it where we did, by the harbour?’

  ‘As safe as it’ll be anywhere.’

  ‘But what if it’s vandalised? Or stolen? I mean, we’re responsible for it. If we hadn’t borrowed it, it would still be stored safely away in the garage in London.’

  ‘Garages can be broken into,’ Nicholas pointed out. ‘Especially in London. There’s very little vandalism and theft around here, particularly out of season.’

  ‘You don’t seem very concerned about it,’ Cathryn retorted in a rather annoyed voice.

  ‘Perhaps I just don’t set too much store by material possessions,’ Nicholas suggested.

  She glanced around the sparsely furnished house. ‘Maybe that’s because you don’t have too many of them!’

  To her surprise, he didn’t take offence. ‘You could be right,’ he agreed. Then he yawned, as if he wasn’t really interested in this conversation. ‘Are you going up to bed?’ he asked.

  She was about to say yes, when she suddenly stopped. There was a brightness in Nicholas’s eyes that she couldn’t remember seeing before. She didn’t know if it was a flicker of amusement—or something else.

  Her wariness must have showed on her face, because the corners of his mouth lifted gently.

  ‘Am I making you nervous, Cathryn?’ he enquired gently.

  ‘Of course not!’ she snapped back instantly. ‘What a perfectly ridiculous thing to say!’

  ‘You’ve certainly never seemed scared of me before,’ he agreed. ‘But then, this is the first time we’ve been alone like this.’

  ‘We were alone at Sir Charles’s flat,’ she pointed out stiffly. ‘At least, until Mandy showed up,’ she added, with more than a touch of sarcasm.

  ‘It wasn’t quite the same, though, was it?’ mused Nicholas. ‘There were people in the flats above, and in the other houses all around us.’

  ‘I wouldn’t have come here with you if I’d been in the least scared of you,’ she said, in what she hoped was a very firm voice.

  ‘No, I suppose not.’ He studied her thoughtfully. ‘Why did you come, Cathryn?’

  But she had had enough of this interrogation. ‘You know perfectly well it was because of my promise to your brother.’

  ‘Oh, yes—the famous promise.’ Somehow, he made it sound like a very lame excuse for being here, and Cathryn grew more angry.

  ‘You don’t think I came because of you?’ she demanded.

  ‘That really would be a very egotistical assumption to make,’ he agreed. And yet his tone of voice clearly told her that he was actually considering it.

  ‘Since we’re on the subject, why did you let me stay?’ she challenged him. ‘All right, you needed me to drive you down here. You could have sent me straight back to London, though. After all, you didn’t want me hanging around all the time, did you?’

  ‘I certainly didn’t think so at the time,’ replied Nicholas. ‘Why did I let you stay?’ His tone had become thoughtful now. ‘I’m rather beginning to wonder that myself.’

  As they faced each other, Cathryn slightly pink and hot now while Nicholas remained outwardly cool, there seemed to be a subtle change in the atmosphere between them. At first, Cathryn thought she was imagining it. There had been no sudden crackle in the air, no visible sign of change. It was more a lessening of tension—the relaxation of taut muscles and the dissolving of the last traces of bad temper.

  Nicholas seemed as surprised by it as she was. He took a step forward, paused, and then looked at her long and hard before taking yet another step.

  Cathryn was certain that she should move, and yet she didn’t. Nor could she seem to look away from Nicholas’s face, which suddenly seemed to have taken on a new aspect. His features were like those of an old friend, whom she had known all her life. Except she was quite certain that Nicholas required a great deal more than friendship from his women...

  She cleared her throat with fresh nervousness. ‘I—er—I think it’s time I went up to bed.’

  ‘Yes—bed,’ he repeated softly.

  A warning shiver ran over her skin. Rather belatedly, she realised she could easily get into something she would find hard to handle.

  ‘There’s not much point in thinking along those lines,’ she advised him crisply. ‘Remember what the doctors told you. You’ve got to live like a monk for the next three or four weeks!’

  ‘I haven’t forgotten,’ he said regretfully. The gleam briefly showed in his eyes again. ‘I suppose a very brief goodnight kiss wouldn’t be too exciting.’

  ‘It wouldn’t excite me,’ Cathryn retorted at once. ‘And I really don’t think it’s necessary.’

  ‘No, not necessary,’ he agreed. ‘Just rather pleasant.’ He moved closer. ‘What do you think, Cathryn?’

  ‘I think you’re in a very odd mood tonight!’

  ‘You could be right.’ There was a flash of green as the light shone directly in his eyes. Too late, Cathryn realised it was because he was already bending his head towards her.

  A moment later, his lips were over hers, warm and firm. Their pressure wasn’t insistent or demanding; instead, they moved gently, as if savouring these few moments of warm pleasure. Then, although she hadn’t expected it, he released her.

  ‘Nice—but frustrating,’ he said drily.

  More off balance than she cared to admit, Cathryn glared at him. ‘Then don’t try it again!’ she snapped back at him.

  ‘Because you didn’t like it?’ Nicholas enquired with interest. ‘Or because you liked it a lot better than you ever expected?’ he said more huskily.

  Cathryn didn’t answer because she was suddenly afraid that she wouldn’t be able to tell a very convincing lie. Instead, she swung round and retreated with dignity up the stairs, hoping that he would draw his own conclusions from the deliberate stiffness of her back.

  Once in her own room, though, she sat on the edge of the bed and let her eyebrows shoot up sky-high in pure surprise. Nicholas was right, she hadn’t expected to like it. Only she had! She had liked it a lot. She was never going to let him know that, of course. And she definitely wasn’t going to let it happen again! Not only did she not trust Nicholas, but for the first time in a very long while Cathryn was no longer quite so certain that she trusted herself.

  CHAPTER SIX

  The water that came out of the tap in the bathroom was only lukewarm, but Cathryn supposed she ought to be grateful that it wasn’t completely stone-cold. She quickly washed, and wished that Nicholas had bought a house with a few more amenities—and in a less God-forsaken spot. On the other hand, he might well be needing a few cold baths before his weeks of enforced celibacy were up!

  She scuttled back to the bedroom, wincing a little as her feet hit the chilly floor. When she climbed into bed, it was as cold as everything else around here seemed to be. The sheets were icy against her skin, and Cathryn wished she had brought thick winceyette pyjamas instead of a cotton nightshirt.

  It was ages before she got to sleep. She lay there and shivered for what seemed like half the night, partly because she was cold and partly because this place seemed really spooky once it had got dark.

  She eventually managed to doze off, and when she opened her eyes again she was relieved to find it was full daylight. In bright sunshine, things never seemed quite so bad.

  She washed and dressed, and then made her way cautiously downstairs. Was Nicholas already up? she wondered. The
house seemed completely silent, and she hoped that meant he was still in bed. After that unexpectedly disturbing kiss last night, she wasn’t in any hurry to face him again!

  The sun might have been shining, but it didn’t seem to be warming up the interior of the house. A chill seemed to lie over all the rooms, and she wished she had brought warmer clothes with her. What was it Nicholas had said about this island having a mild climate? Well, right now, it didn’t feel very mild to her!

  The two downstairs rooms were empty, and so was the kitchen. Cathryn sighed with relief. Nicholas must be sleeping late. Then she noticed the note propped up on the kitchen table.

  ‘Gone to fetch provisions. Back later. Be good while I’m away! Nicholas.’

  Cathryn stared at it. He had gone? He had left her completely alone on this wretched island?

  She ran to the door, flung it open, and stared down towards the jetty. The boat wasn’t there. He had gone.

  She had completely forgotten that she hadn’t wanted to see him. Right now, all she could think about was that she was stuck on this wretched piece of rock, completely cut off from the rest of the world. She had never felt so totally alone in her entire life!

  ‘I wish I’d never come here,’ she muttered shakily under her breath. ‘I wish I’d never heard of Nicholas Ellis!’

  She went back to the kitchen and made herself some coffee, but then couldn’t manage to drink it. Usually, she didn’t mind her own company, but this was a very different sort of loneliness. She knew she couldn’t pick up the phone and chat to someone; couldn’t walk out of the door and meet other people. If she wanted a conversation, it would have to be with a seagull!

  ‘No one in their right mind would want to spend any time in a place like this,’ she told herself edgily. ‘It’s like living in the back of nowhere!’

  She knew she was exaggerating slightly. After all, she could see the mainland quite clearly. She felt so cut-off, though. That narrow strip of water might as well have been a hundred miles wide. She couldn’t swim it; there wasn’t even a boat that would take her across it, not until Nicholas got back. Her sense of isolation grew, and so did her temper. How dared he leave her on her own like this? He must have known how very scared it would make her feel.

  It seemed like half a lifetime before she finally spotted the small boat chugging its way back towards the island. She ran down to meet it, and was yelling at Nicholas even before he had begun to get out.

  ‘Why did you go off like that? You didn’t even warn me you were going! Only a real rat would do something like that!’

  Nicholas glanced up at her in surprise, obviously having no idea what she was ranting on about. ‘What’s the problem?’ he asked.

  ‘The problem?’ she screeched right back at him. ‘The problem is that I’ve been stuck here on this island on my own, and I hate it. I didn’t even know when you were coming back. Or if you were coming back.’

  Nicholas levered himself out of the boat and limped over to her. ‘Do you really think I’d just clear off and leave you here?’ he asked a little tautly.

  ‘I don’t know what you’d do!’ she yelled. ‘For all I know, you might think it was really funny to do something like that!’

  His fingers gripped her arm. ‘I don’t have that kind of a sense of humour,’ he told her sharply. Then he shook her lightly. ‘Get this into some sort of proportion, Cathryn. I didn’t tell you I was going because you were fast asleep. I didn’t want to disturb you. I left you a note, though, and you knew damned well I’d be coming back. Didn’t you?’ he persisted giving her another shake.

  ‘I suppose so,’ she muttered.

  Nicholas’s grip on her arm became less intense. ‘Then why this big scene?’ His finger hooked itself under her chin and pulled her face towards him, so he could stare directly down at her. ‘Were you really that scared?’ he said, his brows drawing together in a deep frown.

  Cathryn was beginning to feel rather silly. ‘I must have been, mustn’t I?’ she said, a faintly sulky note entering her voice now.

  He still looked sceptical. ‘I thought you were the girl who could cope with everything. According to Charles, absolutely nothing ever throws you.’

  ‘Which just goes to show that your brother doesn’t know everything about me!’ she retorted.

  ‘He also said that you never lose your temper,’ remarked Nicholas. ‘He wasn’t quite right about that, either.’

  ‘I never did—until you came along!’

  ‘Life must have been very boring before you met me,’ commented Nicholas. Then, before she could throw a furious answer back at him, he gestured towards the boxes in the boat. ‘Shall we take this lot up to the house?’

  ‘You’ve managed to get it this far. You carry it up. I’m going to have some breakfast.’

  With that, she marched up to the house, not once looking round to see if Nicholas was having any problems hauling the boxes of food up the steep slope.

  Once back in the kitchen, she put the kettle on to boil, to make some fresh coffee. Just as it was boiling, Nicholas came in with the first box. He dumped it on the table, and then shot her an amused look.

  ‘You’re not turning out to be a very conventional sort of nursemaid. Or a very sympathetic one,’ he added.

  ‘You don’t need sympathy,’ Cathryn retorted. ‘In fact, it’s probably not good for you. You’ve been a lot better since I’ve been around to shout at you and hassle you.’

  Nicholas looked at her reflectively. ‘You could be right about that,’ he said at last. ‘Although I don’t think this was the sort of care and attention Charles had in mind when he asked you to look after me! He was expecting you to dole out a lot of solicitude and kind words.’

  ‘I don’t feel very kindly towards you at the moment!’

  ‘You did last night,’ he said softly.

  That stopped her in her tracks. Cathryn’s eyes became very wary and her mouth set into a dead-straight line as she looked at him.

  ‘What exactly do you mean by that?’

  ‘Precisely what I said,’ Nicholas replied calmly. ‘Last night, for just a few moments, you did feel kindly towards me. Very kindly.’

  ‘I think that you must be confusing my reactions with your own,’ Cathryn said in a very cool tone.

  ‘I think our reactions were exactly the same. And in case you’re wondering—yes, that did surprise me as much as it surprised you.’

  ‘I wasn’t surprised about anything,’ Cathryn denied, just a little too hastily. ‘And I don’t intend to be surprised in the future,’ she warned him.

  He didn’t seem in the least perturbed by her response. ‘We’ll see,’ was all he said. Then he turned towards the door. ‘I’ll fetch the rest of the boxes.’

  Cathryn noticed that he was limping quite heavily, and her conscience gave a hefty twitch. ‘I’ll give you a hand,’ she said in a subdued voice.

  ‘You don’t have to. I can manage.’

  ‘I want to.’ She glared at him fiercely. ‘You are an exasperating man. Do you refuse all offers of help on principle?’

  Nicholas shrugged. ‘I suppose I’m just used to looking after myself. I’ve always done it, and I expect I always will.’

  ‘That doesn’t seem to leave much room for anyone else in your life.’

  ‘No, it doesn’t,’ he agreed. ‘Which is why I stick to short-term relationships. Remember that, Cathryn.’

  She instantly bristled at the implication behind his words. ‘I don’t think that I’ll need to remember it,’ she said stiffly. Then, since the one advantage she had over him was mobility, she quickly walked on ahead, successfully putting an end to the conversation.

  After they had brought the rest of the food up to the house and stacked it away, Nicholas announced that he was going to take a rest.

  ‘You sleep an awful lot,’ Cathryn observed with a frown. ‘Is that all part of the delayed shock?’

  ‘I think I’m over most of the shock by now. And I don’t really sle
ep much at all. Just an odd hour here and there. I never manage to sleep right through the night unless I take one of their damned pills.’

  ‘Talking of pills,’ said Cathryn, her frown deepening, ‘you are taking all your medication, aren’t you?’

  Nicholas’s eyebrows gently rose. ‘I thought that was one the things you were meant to keep an eye .on. Isn’t it one of the main reasons Charles wanted you around? To make sure I don’t skip any—or take too many?’

  ‘I can’t watch you every minute of the day. Anyway, you’re an adult, not a child. You shouldn’t need watching.’

  ‘That isn’t what my brother thinks.’

  ‘I’m beginning to think that your brother doesn’t know you very well,’ she said frankly.

  Nicholas looked thoughtful for a moment. ‘Perhaps you ought to tell Charles that, the next time you see him,’ he said at last.

  ‘Why not tell him yourself?’

  His expression became quite unreadable. ‘That might be rather difficult. I might have been staying at my brother’s flat, but Charles and I don’t actually speak to each other unless we absolutely have to. We haven’t done for five years.’

  He limped out of the kitchen after that, putting a very definite end to the conversation. Cathryn sighed. If only she knew the cause of the rift between the two brothers, she might be able to stop saying the wrong thing every time the subject came up.

  She pottered around the kitchen for a while, and then decided to go for a walk to get some fresh air. It was still bright outside, but cooler than it had been during the last few days. She pulled on the thick jacket she had brought with her, and then tramped off.

  Now that Nicholas was back, she found she didn’t mind being on the island so much. It had just been being here totally on her own that had so unnerved her. She climbed to the top of the hill that rose up behind Nicholas’s house; then, puffing hard, she stood there and looked around.

  From here she could see the third house, which was much larger than Nicholas’s. She guessed that his friend, Hamish, must be fairly rolling in money. Owning a place like this, which didn’t have any source of income except for the rent from a couple of houses, and a lot of daffodils which the absent Hamish didn’t even bother to pick, had to be a very expensive hobby!