The Handbook of Chinese Horoscopes (40th Anniversary Edition)

by Theodora Lau

  The Monkey Child

  The Monkey child will be captivating. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, they won’t keep still for a moment. Cheerful, mischievous, and very competitive, these children will steal their way into your heart. Skillful at flattery and extremely good at playing on your weaknesses, the incorrigible Monkey will always get what he or she is after.

  Unpredictable and ingenious, this curious youngster will usually be found fidgeting with some device. Don’t be too upset if they break their toys. It is simply because they are not attracted by the exterior; they take things apart to get inside and see what makes them tick. Intricate mechanical contraptions never fail to amuse or fascinate them. They will be forever trailing after you with brilliant questions about the universe.

  One of these days, when you are about to throw out that unreliable clock that never worked well, your Monkey child will pick it up and fix it with a hairpin. Despite all their talents and possessions, however, they are never content. The grass always looks greener on the other side. The ambitious and conniving little imp is always taking stock of other people’s belongings.

  They are constantly goaded to improve themselves, and they pride themselves on their vast accumulation of knowledge and skills. They will be involved in a myriad of activities. Today they will be investigating photography, and tomorrow they will be learning a new programming language. The Monkey loves electronic gadgetry. Somehow, they know the right buttons to push. The remarkable thing is that Monkeys can divide their attention among several subjects and still be able to master them all. They can be snobbish and cocky and will like to tease others with their versatile wit. Optimistic and forever hopeful, they will never concede defeat. They will try and try again until they succeed.

  Monkey children have a selfish streak and may refuse to share what they have while skillfully helping themselves to other children’s toys. And when Monkey children do share, they will carefully consider what they can get in return. Even the smallest Monkey is adept at weighing the pros and cons. They will cry foul at the slightest edge others may have over them, but they expect you to close both eyes if the scales tip in their favor. Excitable, pretentious, and crafty, they will ignore any regulation that restricts them. They should be taught early in life that they cannot always get everything their way—but this does not mean they will not try. The odds are that they will probably wear us out before we get them to see things our way.

  Then, just when you have reached saturation point and have become totally exasperated with them, the Monkey will turn on their sweet, saintly smile, apologize from the bottom of their heart, pour flattery all over your wounds, and stand on their head to make you laugh. You will immediately forget all the harsh measures you were going to take against them and become their willing captive all over again. Sometimes parents of a Monkey think they can’t live with this child and they can’t live without him or her either. No matter what happens, you can be sure that the Monkey child will bring joy and excitement into your life.

  The Five Different Monkeys

  Metal Monkey—1920, 1980, 2040

  This is the fighting Monkey. Strong, sophisticated, and independent, he or she will have an irrepressible urge for financial security. Capable of making wise investments, Metal Monkeys will prefer to run their own business or earn extra money from outside work if they have a regular job. They are consistent and will be able to hold on to their savings if they don’t speculate in any risky ventures.

  Metal makes Monkeys ardent and demonstrative in their affections. They will have high aspirations and may appear to be status-seeking or overdramatic at times. Still, one can’t help but admire how Monkeys are always trying to better themselves.

  Characterized by a lively disposition, the passionate Metal Monkey can be warm, positive, and very convincing. They are able to sell you anything conceivable, and if they are creative, their designs will be both aesthetically pleasing and useful. The Metal Monkey can be an excellent trendsetter.

  When they are negative, the analytical Metal Monkeys can be exceedingly self-conscious and overly proud. Their few loyalties will be limited to people linked only to themselves.

  Hard-working and practical, they shun assistance from others and will be more than able to take care of their own interests.

  Water Monkey—1932, 1992

  This is a cooperative but speculative Monkey—the “you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours” sort of person. Yet, in spite of their dignified and worldly demeanor, these Monkeys are more easily offended than other Monkeys. They will have a secretive but kind nature, and they can be deft and patient in the pursuit of their objectives.

  Water mated with Monkey’s native sign imparts a greater sense of purpose. But they will not be too direct or obvious in revealing their intentions. They can compromise with grace and work around barriers rather than waste time and energy knocking them down.

  The Water Monkey will have flair and originality; they motivate themselves as well as others with their pleasant ways, and their ideas meet little resistance because of their ingenious ways of introducing them. They will present things in their best possible light. They have a keen understanding of how human relationships function and will use this knowledge to achieve their ends.

  When they decide to be negative, Water Monkeys can suffer from lack of direction. They vacillate and become erratic, evasive, and meddling. If they can keep the lines of communication open, they should be able to weather all storms with aplomb. Patience is a virtue they must cultivate. After all, not everyone can be on the Water Monkey’s wavelength all the time. While people do appreciate this Monkey’s expertise, sometimes they have their own opinions, too.

  Wood Monkey—1944, 2004

  Good rapport with others will be essential to this type of Monkey. But they do not pry into the affairs of those around them if possible, and Wood Monkeys pride themselves on keeping their house and accounts in good order.

  Although these Monkeys are basically honorable and desirous of prestige, they will be restless and have a strong pioneering spirit. They are alert to everything going on around them and are very curious about new inventions or modes of thinking. The Wood element gives them an intuitive cast of mind, which enables him to predict the probable outcome of events. They search constantly for answers and will not take setbacks calmly.

  While maintaining their own admirable standards, Wood Monkeys will strive constantly to elevate themselves above their present station. They are never quite satisfied with what they have and are always on the lookout for greener pastures. As a result, this type of Monkey will leap at new challenges.

  These resourceful people will establish order in whatever work they decide to take up. They are rarely given to exaggeration or speculation. Carefully, carefully, they whittle away the opposition bit by bit. Never underestimate them.

  Fire Monkey—1956, 2016

  These active and energetic Monkeys will have the traits of a natural leader and innovator. They are self-assured and determined, expressive and truthful, and very interested in romantic pursuits.

  The Fire element lends them great vitality, and they have a tendency to dominate or teach those less aggressive than themselves. They possess a fertile imagination and should be careful not to let their ideas run away with them. They are inventive but not always cautious about possible consequences.

  Fire Monkeys have a powerful and constant drive to reach the top of their professional field. They are competitive to the extreme and capable of great jealousy. Their creativity is born of willpower, necessity, and initiative, and these enable them to upstage others and keep one step ahead of the game.

  The Fire Monkey is the most forceful of all the Monkeys. They relish being in control and can be opinionated, stubborn, and argumentative when they are negative. They are lucky in speculative ventures, especially because they can correctly evaluate risks. But in spite of the bold and composed face these Monkeys present to the public, they conceal morbid suspicions of h
ow others may be deceiving them.

  Earth Monkey—1908, 1968,

  The placid and reliable Earth Monkey may have a cool and collected nature. They are expansive and given to disinterested acts of charity.

  They quietly demand admiration and appreciation of their talents and services. If such is not forthcoming, Earth Monkeys can sulk and become withdrawn. At times, they appear eccentric because they can be deep thinkers who may have difficulty explaining their novel ideas to others. Their genius may go a-begging if they refuse to be more conventional.

  They are likely to be intellectuals and will be academically studious or very well-read if they are not able to pursue a higher education. Generally, they will be honest and straightforward and will achieve distinction through their thoroughness and devotion to duty.

  Earth Monkeys will not be too fond of entertaining, but they will be genuinely kind and loving to those they care about. Less concerned about their ego than other Monkeys, they can devote themselves unselfishly to the good of all. They will value their integrity and can even be overly conscientious about operating only within the law.

  Compatibility and Conflict for the Monkey

  The Monkey is part of the First Triangle of Affinity, a group of positive people who are identified as doers. The Rat, the Dragon, and the Monkey are performance- and progress-oriented signs adept at handling matters with initiative and innovation. These self-starters prefer to initiate action, clear their paths of uncertainty and hesitation, and forge ahead. Restless and short-tempered when hindered or forced to be unoccupied, they are full of dynamic energy and ambition. This trio is the melting pot of ideas. They can team up beautifully because they possess a common way of doing things and will appreciate each other’s method of thinking.

  Monkeys will encounter their most serious personality clashes with someone born in the year of the Tiger. Anyone whose ascendant is the Tiger will most likely also come into conflict with the Monkey. In the Circle of Conflict, the Monkey and Tiger are on opposite sides, 180 degrees apart. Metal, the Monkey’s fixed element, is detrimental to Wood, the Tiger’s fixed element. They will have different opinions and outlooks, and they will experience difficulty in understanding each other or comprehending one another’s motives. Unless a Tiger native is born during the hours of the Monkey or vice versa, there is little these two will find in common. Besides trying to upstage each other, the Monkey and the Tiger have entirely opposite views and will do things that may be counterproductive to each other, perhaps without even knowing it. Unintentional as these actions may be, they tend to produce friction and suspicions.

  Aside from the most compatible signs, the Dragon and Monkey, and the most incompatible, the Tiger, the other nine signs are compatible with the Monkey to varying degrees.

  Triangle of Affinity for the Monkey

  Circle of Conflict

  Rat

  The pairing of a Monkey and a Rat is the meeting of two ambitious minds. Both are quite taken with each other’s strengths. The Monkey is a clever problem solver, and the Rat is especially resourceful. The two animals will quickly realize that teaming up will benefit both of them. The Monkey and the Rat will gravitate toward their strengths and give each other the support and the space they need to succeed. As a result, they can work together and produce more as partners than they would have had they gone separate ways.

  Ox

  The Monkey and the Ox have reservations about each other, and for good reason. The clever Monkey, with his or her intricate thinking process, may sometimes be irritated by the Ox’s methodical, stoic ways. The Ox, on the other hand, may find the Monkey’s schemes to have doubtful merit and cannot comprehend the Monkey’s bright but overly complicated ideas. However, these two signs could actually make a good team if they each learn to make use of the qualities the other has to offer. This way, their differences would be turned into their strengths, and they could be a formidable twosome.

  Tiger

  The Tiger and the Monkey never completely trust each other. The Tiger does not understand the Monkey’s personality, which makes for a tenuous relationship. The Monkey is a lighthearted competitor who finds amusement not with his or her opponents but with the game itself. But the Tiger takes the Monkey’s sense of humor as an affront. On the flip side, the Monkey can treat the Tiger with immaturity, being both a bad winner and a bad loser. The Monkey and the Tiger will need a referee if they want to spend a lot of time together.

  Rabbit

  The Rabbit may be impressed by the Monkey’s superior intelligence and ingenuity, but the Rabbit may find it hard to trust the Monkey unless they share a common ascendant. Then again, the Rabbit never completely trusts anyone, and neither does the Monkey. Both are great poker players, but they are also such great sports that they are not sore losers. They could put aside their differences and their subtle rivalry if they find a cause worthy of their combined efforts. The Rabbit knows how to make the Monkey keep his or her end of the bargain, while the Monkey will use charm to captivate the Rabbit.

  Dragon

  The Monkey and the Dragon are the best of allies. The Monkey admires the Dragon’s clear-minded action and fierce loyalty, and the Dragon is impressed by the Monkey’s mind for strategy and gift of persuasion. While some other animals in the Chinese cycle may not know how to work with the larger-than-life personality of the Dragon, the Monkey is adept at stroking the Dragon’s ego to great effect. In turn, the Dragon knows how to applaud the fabulous feats of the Monkey because the Dragon knows all too well that although Monkeys are confident, they also enjoy having others acknowledge their abilities. Together, Monkey and Dragon can plan and execute the most complicated strategies, both in business and in pleasure.

  Snake

  The Snake and the Monkey are two intense and resolute personalities who cannot compromise unless they share a common ascendant and mutual goal. The Monkey finds it hard to trust Snakes completely when these enigmatic creatures keep their thoughts to themselves and stare glassy-eyed at the curious Monkey. The Snake, on the other hand, quickly sizes up the clever Monkey and is fearful of the masterful conniver’s capacity to outwit the Snake when he or she is not looking. Both will be unable to relax in each other’s company for too long and will be looking for each other’s shortcomings instead of building a relationship based on their good points.

  Horse

  The Monkey and the Horse will be able to cooperate to a certain degree and capitalize on each other’s talents to achieve common goals. Both signs like getting things done and will not let petty differences get in the way. They both know the importance of seeing the big picture. Whether long-term ties develop depends on how much they enjoy working together. They are both flexible and adaptable to change and may go their separate ways once a mutual benefit no longer exists. The Monkey will appreciate the Horse’s lively but practical outlook, while the Horse values the Monkey’s ingenuity and clever shortcuts.

  Sheep

  Monkeys will not form strong bonds with Sheep because Monkeys have difficulty understanding the retiring nature of the indulgent Sheep. Their relationship may be cordial to moderately good, as the Sheep may have need of the Monkey’s skill, while the Monkey can benefit from the Sheep’s good reputation and popularity. The Monkey may also want to promote the Sheep’s many artistic and creative talents and be the Sheep’s manager. Sheep are too modest to blow their own horn, so maybe the Monkey will be their agent—for a healthy share of the Sheep’s royalties, of course.

  Monkey

  Monkey and Monkey make a successful team if they have similar interests or common foes. In love and business, they know how to combine their formidable wits and run circles around the opposition. However, they are also prone to rivalry and jealousy; and sometime, somewhere, that selfish streak could surface, such as when they have to share the spoils. But if both negotiate, compromise, or exploit others’ weaknesses, they will still end up ahead of the game. The problem is: What if they are not playing the same game? And who sa
ys they will follow the rules?

  Rooster

  Monkeys know how to handle Roosters, but only to a certain degree. Monkeys could be immune to Rooster criticism if they want something badly enough, and they are not above flattering the Rooster to put him or her in a good mood. However, even the Monkey’s patience could wear thin if the Rooster insists on examining all the details over and over. Monkeys are easily bored and do not have the long attention spans Roosters have. These two could have very different approaches to a common problem. The Monkey will opt for the shortcut or invent one if possible. The Rooster will take the long and winding path and will make simple things difficult through overanalysis.

  Dog

  There should be no underlying animosities between Dog and Monkey. They have a mutual respect for each other and will try to stay out of each other’s way if they have conflicting interests. The Monkey knows better than to step on the Dog’s tail, since the Dog is unrelenting when aroused. On the whole, the Dog is good-natured when it comes to the Monkey’s tricks and will allow the clever Monkey to have his or her way if the Dog can also benefit. The two signs will enjoy friendly to warm relations if they share mutual friends, goals, or interests. However, the Dog is devoted to the Horse and the Tiger, and the Tiger could come between the Dog and the Monkey.

  Boar