by Rose Croft
He watched me thoughtfully. “Interesting.” What did that mean? Before I had a chance to interpret what he’d said, another loud, violent scene dragged our attention back to the TV.
“Where have you been?” My mom and dad were sitting on the couch in the living room, looking like someone had died, when I came home.
“I told you, Mom. I was out with Jamie.”
“You were? Funny, because your father took me out to Jose’s tonight, and we ran into Jamie having dinner with her mother.”
My mind raced, trying to think of how to recover. Of all things to happen. “Where were you? I called you several times tonight. You never answered. Were you seeing that boy again?” I’d left my phone in the car and didn’t see the calls until I was leaving. I didn’t call her back because she called me all the time and usually wanted to talk about how my night was going, as though she had nothing better going on in her life. I couldn’t believe she ran into Jamie. And, gah! Would she quit calling Andrew that boy?
I inhaled slowly, trying to think of the right words that could persuade her to understand. “Andrew is my friend. We just watched a movie at his house. He’s not a bad guy.” I wanted to tell her what actually happened that night with Steve, but then I would be opening a whole can of worms. I didn’t want to throw anyone under the bus because Amanda’s dad was still a prominent figure in the community, and Andrew seemed like he’d only wanted to move on from it. I did, too. Instead, I blurted out, knowing from firsthand experience, “Steve’s a fucking asshole.”
My mother’s eyes shot up like I had just admitted I wanted to be a stripper. My father patted her on the knee. “Language, Loren.”
Mom touched her forehead with the back of her hand. “You lie to us to see this…Andrew character, and now you’re using profanity in front of me. What’s wrong with you? I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”
I wanted to scream, shake her, and tell her she was being ridiculous, overreacting like this. Somehow, I was able to keep my voice even. “Mom, Dad, I’m seventeen and about to be a senior. Don’t you trust me? Don’t you think I can make decisions for myself?” Maybe my dad could be more reasonable if I appealed to him.
He spoke up, using his practical lawyer tone. “Loren, we love you and as grown-up as you think you are now, you’ll always be our child. And, we will always look out for your best interests. But, you lied to us tonight.” His eyes were serious and reflected pain. “I can’t help but wonder whether Andrew is a bad influence on you.”
“Dad…” I couldn’t believe this.
“Loren, it’s late. Get some sleep and we’ll talk about this in the morning.”
My shoulders dropped, feeling like nothing I said would convince them that Andrew wasn’t the problem.
Eight Years Ago
“So, how’ve you been?” Bryan led me to the back of the theater, dropping down beside me in the middle seats of the final row.
“Great. I start my summer job babysitting on Monday.” I was somewhat apprehensive sitting in the back of the partially filled theater, alone on a first date. No one was near us. “How’s your summer so far?”
“Can’t complain.” He offered me some popcorn, but I shook my head. For some reason, it reminded me of the other night and Andrew. Bryan shoved a fistful of kernels in his mouth. “Just been living the dream, baby—partying and working out.” My lips twitched as laughter bubbled up in my throat. He was joking, right? Surely those were not his only interests in life.
I bit my lip, because he didn’t seem to be joking. “You don’t have a summer job?” It seemed like everyone I knew worked during the summer.
“What, you don’t consider working out a job? How do you think I got this?” He swept his hand in front of himself as though showcasing his physique. Again, while I couldn’t argue that his body was chiseled perfection, I was still expecting Bryan to laugh or say “I’m joking.” He didn’t.
“I can see your working out has paid off.” That earned me one of his panty-melting smiles. I took a sip of my diet soda, trying to douse the heat that was seeping through me. Obviously, my body could overlook his somewhat douchy braggadocio.
“Anyway, I’ll be helping out at some of the football and baseball camps at the high school in July and August.”
Soon the lights dimmed and the previews ran. Bryan stretched out his legs, kicking them over the seat in from of him as he leaned back in his chair. His huge, bulging arm brushed mine as he gripped the armrest. I sat up straighter, resting my hand in my lap. “You okay?” he asked. “I’m sorry. It’s hard to get comfortable in these seats.”
“No. You’re good.”
The movie was some action film with Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham and at least five other actors I’d seen in other movies that also included guns, explosions and fighting. About midway through the movie, I noticed Bryan shifting in his seat again; he’d only done it about ten other times. However, this time he stretched his arm behind me on the back of my seat. His thumb brushed my shoulder.
Toward the end of the film, his hand ran over my shoulder as his fingers stroked my arm. I stiffened, nervous that this was too intimate for me, which was weird because I didn’t feel that way when Andrew had put his arm around me.
“Is this okay, Loren? Shit, I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.” His eyes flashed concern as he slid his hand away. “I’m so sorry about what happened the other night at the party. I’m not like…that.” I knew he wanted to say like Steve.
“I’m fine. I-I know you’re not like that.” At least, I didn’t think he was. Bryan’s brows were still drawn, and he pursed his lips like he didn’t know what to say next.
I didn’t want him to feel guilt over something that had nothing to do with him. He’d been there for me. I placed my hand on his, giving a squeeze. “Hey, I’m okay.”
He exhaled as though he’d been holding his breath. His fingers laced around my hand, and he smiled.
His hand stayed there the rest of the movie.
“Did you like the movie?” Bryan and I were walking out to his car.
“Yeah.”
“Did anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?” He wrapped a hand over my shoulder, shaking me, trying to get me to loosen up.
I laughed. “Sorry, I liked the movie. There was no lack of action, that’s for sure.” I actually didn’t care for the movie, but I wasn’t going to complain.
His hand was now at my waist. “So, what makes you tick, Loren?” We stopped in front of his Jeep. “What are your interests besides sports? I know you play basketball. You’re really good, by the way.”
My eyes widened at his compliment. I was shocked that he’d noticed. “Thank you.” We now faced each other and I leaned a shoulder against his Jeep. “I like to read and write poetry.”
“Poetry, huh?” He smoothed a stray strand off my face. “I have a poem. Would you like to hear it?” He stroked his thumb over my cheek. My face seared.
“Sure.” Bryan wrote poetry, too? Wow, I never would’ve pegged him as being a poet. Maybe there was more to him than the happy-go-lucky hot jock.
“Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
All I’ve thought about all night
Is how I want to kiss you.”
And my hope that he was into poetry was blown apart. Seriously? It seemed like he took something very special to me and treated it like a big joke—as a tool to get a kiss. Did he think that would impress me? In his defense, he didn’t know anything about what I wrote, and maybe in his mind he was trying to relate to me. Maybe he thought he’d just come up with a brilliant poem.
“So…can I kiss you, beautiful?” He leaned in while he cupped my face with both hands, and my inner poetry snob vanished in seconds.
He called me beautiful, and he was about to kiss me. The guy I’d fantasized about for months. My heart accelerated. “Yes.” I barely got it out because my throat was dry like I’d swallowed a tall glass of sand.
He
leaned in and his mouth touched mine. The kiss deepened quickly on his end as I followed. Soon, his tongue parted my lips, touching mine as he moaned. And, instead of thinking this was a sweet, life-altering kiss, or thinking how I’d dreamt of this moment, my mind started wandering. Okay, this kiss wasn’t horrible. It may have been a little sloppier than Andrew’s. His tongue felt foreign in my mouth, but it was the first time. And, when does anyone get comfortable with someone else’s tongue in their mouth? I felt a whoosh of air on my cheek. Maybe he breathed too heavily while we kissed. It didn’t move me to want to keep kissing him forever. All I kept thinking was it just didn’t feel right.
I was still analyzing every moment until I realized we’d finally pulled apart. Bryan smiled cockily, presumably unaware I hadn’t felt the earth move. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”
“You ready to go to the lake?” A few days later, Bryan was standing at the door of my house, looking like the poster boy for outdoor life, in navy swim trunks and a fitted white tee accentuating every muscle in his upper body. His Ray-Bans were pushed up on his head. It was mid-June and we were headed to Mason’s lake house.
“Yeah, let me get a towel.” He followed me inside, and my mother apprehended him before I made it down the hallway.
“Oh, Bryan, it’s so good to see you again.” My mother was using her over-the-top syrupy voice. I was still upset with her from the other morning after they’d caught me in my lie. My mother flat-out forbade me to see Andrew again, and Dad was in complete agreement. It pissed me off; it felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest. But, in the end, I complied. She’d never been friendly with Andrew as she was with Bryan. And that, too, irked the hell out of me. Can someone say “trying too hard?”
“Hi, Mrs. Douglas. How are you?” Bryan flashed his million-dollar smile.
I jerked my thumb behind me. “I’m going to get some things. I’ll be right back.” This was uncomfortable, and I wanted to get out of there before my mom said something embarrassing. If anything, Bryan was a charmer and knew how to carry himself in conversations with my parents. He’d fought through one the other night when he picked me up to take me to the movies. My mother had asked him fifty questions about school, baseball, his future plans. I think the only thing she didn’t find out about him was his blood type.
When I returned to the living room with my bag full of everything I needed, I noticed my mother was relating one of her “high school stories.” Bryan had his arms crossed over his chest as he slightly rocked back on his heels. I’m sure he was chomping at the bit to leave, but he gave my mom his undivided attention.
“All set. You ready, Bryan?” He nodded and I detected a look of relief passed over his face. We said our goodbyes, and Mom told us to be safe. “Wear a life jacket and no drinking.” We assured her we wouldn’t drink, but I knew that was probably a lie seeing as how all the other gatherings I’d been to had served alcohol. Not to mention, Bryan seemed to like to party.
Bryan flipped his sunglasses down over his eyes as he led me to his Jeep Wrangler with the top off. “Your mom’s quite the talker, isn’t she?” He slipped my beach bag off my shoulder and set it in the back.
“I know. Sorry about that.” He helped me into my seat and walked around the front of the hood.
“Why? She’s just acting like a parent. She obviously cares about you or she wouldn’t ask so many questions.” By now he’d slid into his seat and leaned an arm over the steering wheel. “Sometimes, I wished my mother took an interest in me like that.” He stared straight ahead and a vein in his neck pulsed. What did that mean? I hadn’t met Bryan’s mother, but it seemed like she might be a touchy subject, if his now hard-as-granite profile was any indication.
Bryan revved the engine and his face transformed back into the lovable all-star athlete again. He leaned in and fingered the hem of my tank top on my shoulder. “You do have your swimsuit on, right?”
“Uh, yeah, I assumed we’re going swimming.” I didn’t want to call him an idiot, but that was a stupid question.
He smirked as though this were leading up to some joke. “We’re going out on Mason’s boat. Plan on getting wet, very wet.” My face flushed at his comment, hoping he didn’t think we were going all the way today. He’d been a gentleman the other night at the movies. But, maybe he thought the second time out together meant going further than kissing. I didn’t know since I’d never been on a second date with the same person. I started getting nervous. Maybe this lake party was going to be one big sex fest. What if Steve’s there? He probably would be since it was Mason’s party. Oh God, why did I agree to go to the lake.
“You’re quiet over there, Loren. What’s going through your head?” We’d pulled off the main road, turning left onto a side road that led to the lake.
I collected my windblown hair, holding it over one shoulder. “Are Steve and Miley going to be there?”
Bryan shook his head. “No, he’s in Arkansas visiting the campus, and Miley went with him.” He patted my thigh as if reassuring me everything was okay.
Twenty minutes later, we’d pulled up in front of Mason’s lake house. It was a beautiful house on a secluded lot with a long dock and a forty-six-foot-long yacht.
I recognized most of the people there. Many were on the team. I saw Leslie and a lot of the other girls in their clique. Jamie was among them, too, and she looked up and waved at Bryan and me as we approached.
“Hey! How are you?” Her face glowed on seeing Bryan and me together. We hugged.
After making some small talk, Bryan steered Jamie and me in the direction of the dock. “Come on, girls. We’re going out on the boat.”
We walked down to the wooden pier and saw Mason and some others stepping onto the boat. There was also a crusty-looking old man sitting in the captain’s seat. “Who is that?” I whispered to Bryan as he helped us onto the boat.
“That’s the captain. Mason’s father’s old friend who’s here to man the helm because he didn’t want any of us wrecking his boat or doing something stupid.”
Once on the vessel, Bryan grabbed some plastic cups. He pulled a couple of beers out of a cooler and poured them into the cups, which he handed to Jamie and me.
As we started cruising around the lake, Bryan was joking with Mason and another guy. Jamie motioned for me to follow her up to the bow of the boat. I’m sure she wanted to know all the details about Bryan and me. We unpacked towels from our bags, stripped down to our swimsuits, and I heard Bryan shout and whistle below us. “Take it off!” I giggled as Jamie held out her middle finger to him.
We lathered our skin with sunscreen, and I helped Jamie rub some on her back. “Okay, Loren, I want deets about your date the other night.” Jamie knew Bryan had taken me to the movies because I had called and told her when he’d asked me out.
“It was nice.”
Jamie motioned for me to turn around, taking the lotion from my hand. “And…tell me more. I swear sometimes talking to you is like trying to perform heart surgery on a lion.”
I snickered because that was a weird analogy. “It was…”
Before I could elaborate, Bryan showed up. “You girls need some help with that?”
He grabbed the lotion, squeezed some in his hand, and began rubbing my shoulders and back. My body tensed. I was still trying to get used to Bryan’s touch. He stopped and waited to get my approval. I glanced over at Jamie, who was bent over looking for something in her beach bag. I twisted my head and smiled. “It’s okay.”
Seeming relieved, he continued. Then he laid the bottle in my hand. “Can you put some on my back?”
“Sure.” I turned as he pulled his shirt off, and I stared at his chest. His body was amazing.
He smiled and flexed his muscles. “You like that? You like that?” And his pecs seemed to be in sync with his mouth as it moved.
“Oh, yeah, so impressive.” I rolled my eyes, trying to play it off. It was more than impressive. However, again, I got it that he had the body of a god, but
did he have to brag about it so much? It was kind of…weird. “Turn around.”
He gave me his back, and I’ll be damned if he didn’t have muscles bulging there, too. I smoothed the lotion over his back. “Do you, like, lift weights for two hours every day or what?”
“I told you working out was like a full-time job for me,” he responded as I finished. Jeez, he wasn’t lying. He took the bottle and squeezed some on his chest and rubbed it in, a smug look on his face.
I turned around so it didn’t seem like I was ogling him and saw Jamie lounging on her towel. I dropped down, reclined back on my elbows, and followed suit. Bryan sat down next to me.
Out in the water to our left was one of the guys on a Jet Ski, yelling and waving as he jumped the wake from another boat. “Have you ever been on one of those?” He tipped his cup toward the Jet Ski.
“No. I never have.”
He took a sip from his cup. “Get ready because you’re going to do it today with me.” He leaned down and whispered in my ear, “I like your swimsuit. You look fine as hell.” His mouth lingered near my ear and my stomach fluttered.
I took a sip of my beer as the boat jolted after hitting the wake from another cruiser. The beer trickled down my chin onto my stomach. Before I could wipe it off, Bryan’s hand swiped my stomach. “Hey, you’re wasting good beer.” His hand lingered on my side, and he licked his lips. He moved in closer. I thought he was going to kiss me.
“Good beer?” Jamie interjected as she sat up. “You mean cheap beer, right?”
He lifted his hand and leaned over me to shove Jamie playfully. She put her hand in her cup and flicked beer on his face. He did the same thing back. I didn’t want to be in the middle of this so I inched back from in between them.
Bryan paused and eyed me. “Where are you going?”
“Just getting out of the way.”
He shook his head and crawled toward me, holding his cup over my head as though he were going to dump it. “Don’t you dare.” I reared my cup back like I would toss the contents on him.