Irresistible Deceptions

by Mackenzie Crowne

  Standing in Nicky’s darkened hallway, shame and rage had burned like acid in Rhy’s veins. After all his training, years of field experience, and his adherence to the code, he’d been used by Everson like a boot camp recruit. He’d seen the knowledge of that truth in Everson’s eyes. Seen the gloating pleasure and the satisfaction that Rhy knew it, too. And it hadn’t mattered one fucking bit.

  He’d known at that moment only Nicky mattered. More than the mission. More than his reputation. More than his life. He’d gladly give them all up if it meant Nicky would live, because he couldn’t imagine life without her.

  How the hell had he ever thought he could walk away from her? Strong, independent, sexy, and fierce, she’d been through hell and survived. Where he’d turned his back on life, hiding behind his code when his own hell arrived, she’d faced life head-on and never faltered. She’d shown him what it was to feel again, and he didn’t want to go back to his numb existence.

  He loved her. She and Alex were the family he never believed he could have again. It had taken nearly losing her to see the truth, but after everything he’d done, convincing her to believe in him again would be the most difficult mission of his life.

  Shoving away from the old-fashioned, porcelain sink, he stalked into the busy hallway and left the hospital for Prescott just as the Hawleys arrived.

  Nicky was adrift in a sea of pain. No sound. Fire burned her veins from within. Couldn’t move. Couldn’t think. Lost and burning. Fear. The agony washed away as quickly as it came.

  A soft beeping disturbed the void, and the pain returned. Easier now, but still agonizing. Voices drifted past. She tried to call out, but no sound emerged, and fire scorched her throat. The blessed darkness called to her, and she answered with a moan.

  “Nicky.”

  Her eyelids were so heavy she could barely lift them. Joyce Hawley’s face floated above her like a cartoon balloon. The picture frightened her, and she let her eyes slide closed. “Alex?” Who was that calling for Alex? They sounded like a frog.

  “He’s fine. Safe.”

  Terror gripped her as recollection slammed into her foggy mind. A rush of adrenaline pulsed in her head in time to the increased beeping in the distance. “Oh, God. Jonathan…”

  A deeper voice responded. “Everson is dead. It’s over, Nicky. You’re safe.”

  “Rhy?” She opened her eyes, but it was Paul’s distorted face she found. Disappointment and fear swirled and threatened to suck her back into the darkness. Where was Rhy? Dead? Jonathan was dead? The void claimed her before she could ask how.

  Time had no meaning as Nicky floated on a sea of pain and confusion. Faces swam before her, some familiar, some strangers, as she drifted between wakefulness and blessed darkness, until finally, she opened her eyes to a world that made sense. The room was dim, lit by the glow of fluorescent lighting in the hallway. Why was she in the hospital? Machines surrounded her, but thankfully, the constant beeping was gone. She glanced around and hissed at the sharp pull in her shoulder.

  Rustling from the corner of the room drew her attention. Rhy rose from a chair and closed the distance to lean over her at the side of the bed. Stubble darkened his cheeks and jaw beneath bloodshot eyes. “Nicky.” His breath rushed from his lips as his gaze roamed her face. “What do you need, baby? Are you in pain?”

  She hurt all over, but the need for answers trumped the pain. “What happened?”

  He lifted her left hand, cradling it in his like a wounded bird. “Everson is dead.”

  The confirmation rippled through her and left goose bumps behind. “I know. Paul told me. He and Joyce were here.” She swallowed, wincing at the soreness of her throat. “I think.”

  His lips softened in a small smile. “One or both of them have been here around the clock. When you woke up a few hours ago, the senator insisted on taking Joyce back to the hotel for some rest.”

  Around the clock? “How long have I been here? And why?”

  “Four days.” He rubbed his thumb over her fingers. “You were shot. In the shoulder.”

  She glanced down at the thick padding covering her chest and wrapped around her shoulder and right arm. Memories scrolled through her mind. Tim’s warning on the radio. Jonathan’s taunting words and his hot breath in her ear. His weapon trained on Rhy. Fearing she would have to watch him die. Diving into the den as piercing fire exploded in her shoulder.

  “The docs say you’ll make a full recovery,” Rhy hurried to say. “The bullet went straight through, but it nicked an artery.”

  His fingers clenched around hers, and she looked up. Hell burned in his eyes.

  “Jesus, baby. You lost so much blood. I didn’t think you were going to make it. Fuck.” His eyes slammed shut, and he dropped his forehead to their joined hands. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m so damned sorry.”

  She stared at the top of his head. This wasn’t right. This wasn’t Rhy, and his despondency hurt worse than her shoulder. “Why are you sorry? You didn’t shoot me.”

  She was alive, and Jonathan was dead. As if the truth had just sunk in, relief surged through her, and a laugh bubbled up and out. For years, she’d feared facing Jonathan again. Now she had, and she’d been the one to survive. She’d been released from a life sentence, and a bullet to the shoulder was a small price to pay for her freedom. Couldn’t Rhy see that?

  Her laughter faded as he lifted his head.

  His eyes were full of self-derision. “I let him get to you. I’ve spent my life protecting people, because it’s my job. But with you…” His chest swelled on a shuddering breath, and he shook his head. “With you and Alex it was more than a job. I needed to protect you. I love you, Nicky, and I fucked up. Again. Just as I have since the moment I fell for Everson’s con.”

  The breath backed up in her throat. He loved her. Rhy McLean loved her. Her heart thrilled at the knowledge she wasn’t alone in her feelings, but there was sadness there as well. Though she longed to spin a dream of happily ever after, she knew the truth. Dreams didn’t last. The job, the danger, they were what made Rhy who he was. Sooner or later, another mission would claim him, and others would follow. She and Alex had come too far, had endured too much, to come in second. They deserved more.

  She squeezed Rhy’s fingers. “You did the job you were trained to do, and you don’t owe me an apology, for anything. I’m alive, Rhy, and Alex is safe. The mission was a success.”

  “Some success. You nearly died.”

  A small smile curled her lips. “But I didn’t.”

  He grunted, but then his brows slid together in a wary frown. “And the fact that I just admitted I love you? You don’t have anything to say about that?”

  She held his gaze. “I love you, too. I think you already knew that.”

  His eyes sparkled with pleasure, and a teasing grin twisted his lips. “With the way you grouped your shots during target practice the other day, I was hoping you did.”

  She smiled and dropped her gaze to the blanket covering her legs.

  He leaned forward and tucked a knuckle beneath her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “I sense there’s a ‘but’ coming.”

  She refused to look away. “But what comes next? We set up house and play family until another mission takes you away? You said it yourself. The mission comes first.”

  “Nicky, I—”

  “That’s not a criticism. Your determination and commitment to the job are a big part of what makes you the man you are, and I’ll be forever grateful for that part of you. Without it, Alex and I wouldn’t have survived.” She ached at the shadows darkening his eyes, but repeating the mistakes of the past would only destroy them both. “You’ll always have my love, Rhy, but Alex and I have endured too much to settle for second place.”

  Frustration tightened his features, and he opened his mouth.

  “You’re awake! Oh, thank God.”

  Nicky turned at the new voice, thankful for the interruption. Prolonging the inevitable would only make walking away hard
er. She smiled as Peggy hurried to the free side of the bed. “God, girl. You scared the hell out of us.”

  Rhy slid his fingers from Nicky’s and stood. “I’ll let the two of you catch up.” He pinned Peggy with a stern stare. “Don’t let her tire herself out.”

  Peggy shot him a jaunty salute.

  He frowned and turned back to Nicky. “I’ll be back in the morning. The Feds will want to get your statement, and I promised Alex I’d bring him in to see you as soon as you were up to it.”

  “Alex is here?” Nicky jerked up straighter, groaned at the lash of pain in her shoulder, and lay back.

  Concern eclipsed the frustration in Rhy’s narrowed eyes. “He’s at the hotel with Lyndsay, but maybe we should wait a few more days.”

  “No.” Nicky shook her head, breathing through her nose as the pain eased. “No, please. I want to see him.”

  He studied her for a long moment then leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead. He pulled back enough to look into her eyes. “You and I aren’t finished. Not by a long shot.” Straightening, he turned and stalked toward the door. “Get some rest.”

  “Wow,” Peggy breathed as he disappeared. “He’s gorgeous and rather…masterful, isn’t he?”

  Nicky dragged her gaze back to find Peggy fanning herself. “You have no idea.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  A week later, Nicky stared out the window of Rhy’s SUV at the woman framed by the open door of his town house. Stylishly dressed in a fitted, navy pantsuit, the sixtyish woman projected an air of confidence common among the Washington power set, while her dark red hair, cut in a short, sassy style, kept the overall package from appearing strictly conservative.

  “That’s the nurse?” Nicky turned to Rhy.

  He smiled and unclipped his seat belt. “Her name is Sarah.”

  He climbed from the vehicle and rounded the hood. Nerves bunched in Nicky’s belly. What the hell was she doing? She could hire her own medical personnel, and how hard could it be to sublet an apartment in DC until she figured out what came next and where she and Alex would live?

  Rhy had been relentless, insisting things weren’t over between them, and it seemed the entire world, with his help, had conspired to make his claim true. Her doctor had agreed to her early release, under the stipulation she have help during her convalescence. Unfortunately, Paul claimed the investigation into his Cambodian connections would keep Joyce and him too busy to care for her as she needed, and Peggy had a full-time job. The Maxwells had agreed to take Alex and Nicky back to the ranch but had suddenly backed down, suggesting she take Rhy up on his offer to house and care for her until she was on her feet.

  Clearly, he had them all in his pocket, and since she had no other friends to speak of, her options were limited. If she wanted to leave the hospital behind, Rhy was her ticket out.

  He opened her door and winked at Alex as her son scrambled from the backseat. “Grab Mom’s bag, will you, sport?”

  Alex dove back into the car to grab the bag full of instructions the doctor had handed her upon release.

  “You ready?” Rhy slid one arm beneath her hips and lifted her from the car. “Slip your good arm over my shoulder.”

  “I can walk on my own,” she grumbled.

  “Doctor’s orders.” He bumped the door closed with his hip. “It’s me or a wheelchair.”

  Nicky held on as instructed as he moved up the walk with Alex following. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” she whispered as they approached the waiting nurse.

  A sly smile was his only reply.

  His inability to see reason added frustration to her case of nerves. Why couldn’t he understand she was trying to protect them both from heartache neither of them could afford? She’d had enough loss in her life, and so had he. He still grieved for Emily and always would, and whether he admitted it or not, losing Pamela had left scars. Why did he insist on setting himself up for yet another loss?

  Sarah, the nurse, stepped back to let them inside and turned on Alex with a wide smile. “And who is this handsome young man?”

  “I’m Alex, but Rhy calls me sport. And I get to do the sign-out on the radio. My code name is BB.” He grinned up at Rhy.

  Sarah laughed. “Of course, that’s right. Hello, BB.” She winked. “I’ve heard all about your adventures over the past few weeks.”

  Confused, Nicky flicked her gaze to meet Rhy’s.

  His lips twisted as if he was fighting a grin. “Alex, Nicky, this is Sarah Mclean.”

  Nicky choked and turned it into a cough. “Your mother?”

  “And your nurse, for the next few weeks,” Sarah expanded.

  Nicky pinned Rhy with an accusing frown. “You told me your mother was a doctor.”

  “I am.” Sarah shut the door. “And I’m on a sabbatical, so there’s no need to worry you’re taking me away from my patients. You must be exhausted after flying.” She flapped her hands in a shooing motion. “Take her upstairs, Rhy.” Turning to Alex, she bent at the waist. “Are those her hospital papers?”

  Alex nodded and held up the plastic bag.

  She took it and smiled. “There are some cookies in the kitchen. Chocolate chip. They’re Rhy’s favorite. Would you like a snack while your momma gets settled?”

  He looked at Nicky.

  She nodded. “What do you say, Alex?”

  He offered Sarah a big smile. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome, darlin’.” Sarah returned his smile. “Come with me. We’ll get you a plate, and I’ll pour you a glass of milk.” She turned to Rhy and shooed him once more. He headed for the stairs immediately.

  Nicky glanced over his shoulder, watching Rhy’s mother escort Alex down the hall toward the kitchen. Turning her head, she blew out a breath. “I’m dizzy.”

  He laughed. “Mom has that effect on most people.”

  She chewed at her bottom lip. “I feel like I’m imposing.”

  “You’re not. She insisted.” He passed by the room she and Alex had shared during their stay earlier and delivered her into the master bedroom.

  She stiffened in his arms. “No, Rhy. This is not a good idea. The spare bedroom is fine.”

  “Mom’s orders.” He lowered her to the bed and straightened. “Alex needs to sleep somewhere, and Mom doesn’t want him jostling you.”

  “What about you?”

  He grinned. “Unfortunately, there’s a pull-out bed in the den.”

  “And you’ll be sleeping in it. Alone.” Sarah breezed into the room.

  He grimaced, but didn’t argue, and Nicky hid a smile.

  Sarah sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Nicky’s release instructions from the bag. “By the way, that new contract you’ve been waiting for is on the dresser, Rhy. Wanda dropped it off an hour ago.”

  Nicky’s stomach sank. A new contract meant a new mission. So soon? Her gaze clashed with Rhy’s. The smile he’d worn earlier was gone. He watched her with hooded eyes. Tears sprang, stinging her nose, and she looked away. Damn it. Why hadn’t she held her ground? Instead of letting him bully her into coming to his home, she should be in a hotel somewhere. Somewhere she wouldn’t have to watch him choose his next mission over her.

  “Nicky—”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake. Tell her already.” Sarah laid a hand on Nicky’s ankle. She smiled encouragingly. “Can’t you see she’s hurting? And she’s suffered a traumatic injury. Additional stress isn’t good for her.”

  Nicky sniffed and glanced back at Rhy. “Tell me what?”

  He crossed to the dresser, picked up an envelope, and returned to squat beside the bed. He tapped the packet against his thigh. “That I love you.”

  “Rhy…” She rubbed a hand over her forehead in an attempt to hide the threatening tears.

  “You said you loved me, too.”

  Her gaze slid to Sarah, who wasn’t even trying to pretend she wasn’t listening. Turning back, Nicky sighed and shook her head. “I do love you, Rhy. Loving you isn’t the pro
blem.”

  He dipped his chin in a nod. “No, my fear of taking a chance again is the problem. Was the problem. I didn’t respect the love I had for Pamela. My team, the missions, they were so much a part of me, I didn’t see there was another part just as important. Just as necessary. The husband. The father. I lost Pamela because I was blind to everything but the job, and when she and Emily were killed, I blamed her for the loss.”

  He handed her the envelope.

  “What’s this?” Confused, she glanced down.

  “It’s the contract naming Tim Burns my new overseas leader.” Rhy picked up her hand and played with her fingers. “I offered him the job last week, and he accepted. From here on, I’m stateside. I’ll be handling the administrative end of the business. Tim will handle the men.”

  Her chest contracted on a sob, and she looked up, slapping the envelope over her mouth. His face wavered, thanks to the tears filling her eyes. His were full of love and determination.

  “I have a new mission, Nicky, and only two clients. You and Alex.”

  “Um, you might want to amend that to three clients.”

  Nicky blinked as they both turned to stare at Sarah. As she scanned the top sheet of Nicky’s instructions, a grin grew on his mother’s lips. She stood suddenly and passed the sheet to Nicky. “Apparently, your doctor ran some blood work before you were released.” She pinned Rhy with a stern stare. “I have another batch of cookies to bake. It’ll take me approximately a half hour. I trust you can refrain from tiring out my patient while I’m gone?”

  She strolled from the room humming something that sounded suspiciously like Brahms’s Lullaby. Nicky stared at the empty doorway then dropped her gaze to the blood work results. One word leaped from the page. Her hands trembled, and her head spun.

  “What is it?” His voice shook.

  She jerked, her gaze flying to Rhy’s. A slightly wild laugh broke past her clenched lips.