Willoughby 03 - A Rogue's Deadly Redemption

by Jeannie Ruesch

  Her knees grew weak and before she could reach out to steady herself, she crumbled to the floor, arms curled around her midsection, fingers holding on. The pain from her fingernails was welcome, a reassurance that yes, she was alive. Robert was alive.

  His end of the bargain. That’s what Blade had said.

  What had Robert gotten into, and if he didn’t wake up, what in God’s name was she going to do when those men came back?

  ***

  Hours later, Lily sat in the parlor. The sun had fallen, leaving the room in shadows. At some point, Mrs. Tandy had come in to stoke the fire and add some heat into the room. Anna had placed a blanket over her lap but it hadn’t touched the shudders deep inside Lily’s bones. The remaining flickers of light danced on the wall in a frenzied rhythm.

  The fear she had felt in facing those men hadn’t subsided. Instead, it had wrapped around her with the grip of a ghost fighting for survival. Her body shivered every few seconds, no matter how close to the fire she sat.

  She could have died.

  God only knew what the beating he’d administered had done to Robert. He might never wake up. The steady ache in her heart had been flayed open, a wound that pulsed with pain.

  “My lady.”

  The alarmed voice belonged to Edwin, his purposeful stride bringing him a foot away. “What happened? Mrs. Tandy told me men broke in.”

  Anger surged. “Where did you go? What has my husband been doing, Edwin? I know you are aware of his activities, you are his shadow. What brought those men to our door?”

  The concern fled his face, shuttered behind a blank look, much like staring into a wall of mud. “Are you hurt?”

  “He held a gun at me!” she yelled as the emotions careened inside of her. “It was Robert’s gun. I tried to—I didn’t know…”

  “Mr. Melrose?” he asked as he swiveled around.

  “They hit him.” Edwin took off for the stairs and Lily hurried after him. “You aren’t answering my questions. I demand to know what Robert is involved in.”

  “It is not my place.”

  “You are with him, wherever he goes. Every time he leaves here, stays late at night. You are not just a valet.” She dogged his heels. “You know what he’s involved in.”

  Edwin didn’t stop until he reached Robert’s door, and as he placed a hand on the doorknob, she reached out to grab his arm.

  “Edwin. Those men are dangerous.”

  “Yes,” he agreed in a flat tone that did nothing to assuage her fears. “You shouldn’t be here. This has nothing to do with you.”

  “Nothing to do with…” Her words trailed off as Edwin walked away and entered Robert’s room.

  Those men could have killed them both, and yet it had nothing to do with her? Did Edwin think she could walk away? Leave Robert to a servant’s protection and go on her merry way?

  She followed him in.

  “If you know how to fix this, if you know what those men were looking for, you need to give it to them,” Lily urged.

  “Lady Melrose, forgive my bluntness, but you must return to your brother’s home.” Edwin lit a few candles and long, clawed shadows slashed across the walls of the room. “That’s what Mr. Melrose would want. I can protect him. I was attempting to do that while I was gone. I can watch over him but not if I have to protect you as well.”

  “And if he doesn’t awaken?”

  “Then it won’t matter, and you will still be safe.”

  “I can’t leave him to a—”

  “A servant?” he finished. “You can. He and I have fared alone for quite some time. If he had wanted you to be a part of this, my lady, he would have shared it with you. I urge you, leave now. Leave this to me.”

  The bald truth filled her with a heavy sadness. She had her family, so many people to care about her, and Robert had no one but a servant.

  But that wasn’t true.

  He had family.

  Brothers. Robert’s parents had died in recent years, but hadn’t Edwin said Robert had gone to see his brother? She had only met his brothers on the day of her wedding, but Robert must have been on speaking terms with them. Another hint Robert hadn’t wanted her to be a part of his life. How many hints did one woman need?

  She couldn’t leave Robert with only a servant by his side, not with his health so precarious, not with the certain threat looming over his head. But she could tell his family what had happened. They could deal with whatever Robert had done. Her obligation as Robert’s estranged wife would be complete.

  Though, that thought didn’t provide an ounce of relief.

  Chapter Nine

  Lily stood in the front parlor of Wayfair House and tapped her fingers against the heavy kerseymere of her cloak, trying not to clench and unclench her fists. She’d been ushered into this room at least twenty minutes prior. Irritation was setting in.

  What part of “urgent” hadn’t Robert’s brother understood?

  “Lady Melrose?”

  Finally.

  She turned as a man strode toward her. He bore a blurry resemblance to Robert. The same broad shoulders, the same etched angles chiseled into his face, the same deep blue eyes. This man’s dark hair curled about the ends as Robert’s did, though Robert’s hair was less contained, the curls longer.

  It was eerie seeing a man who bore the clear stamp of family to the man she’d just left in such precarious health. “Lord Wayfair?”

  The man offered a puzzled smile. “I am his brother, the Viscount Carrington, but please, call me Cary. Is Robert with you?”

  “No.” She frowned. “I asked to see the Marquess. Will he be joining us?”

  “He was detained. Might I help in some way? What brings you here?”

  She shouldn’t be surprised. She might be their sister-in-law, but they’d had little interaction. There would be no reason to accept that her business was urgent, but to not even address her?

  She put her chin up. “I need to speak with him. With both of you. As I said, it’s urgent. It’s about Robert.”

  Concern flared in his eyes. “Is he all right?”

  She shook her head. “No, he isn’t. He was in an accident.”

  “What has the doctor said? Has a doctor been called?”

  “Of course. He says he cannot do anything until Robert wakes up. It’s been a few days and there is no sign of movement. I…” The fear that had been her constant companion welled up. “I’m worried he won’t recover. He is all alone.”

  “That is because you left him, is it not?”

  The harsh words were spoken from behind her, and Lily swiveled around. “I beg your pardon.”

  He made his way toward them. He was older than she’d recalled, with a good decade over Robert. Cary seemed of a similar age.

  “I am surprised to see you here, Lady Melrose. Reports are that you left my brother days ago. What brings you to the side of his cause today?”

  “Did you hear what I said?” she asked.

  The man’s inscrutable hardness didn’t change. “He was in an accident. I assume it was the same one that destroyed my carriage?”

  Her mouth dropped. “You knew? You knew about what happened and didn’t think to see if he was all right?”

  “Marcus?” Cary said. “Is that true?”

  “Why should I? My driver returned in relative health, he said Robert had passed out and his man took him home. Robert has made his wishes very clear and far be it from me to violate them.”

  “But, Marcus, if he was injured we should have—”

  “What, Cary? Gone to his side only to be ejected again? What would that serve?”

  “He is our brother.”

  The Marquess whirled around and stepped close to his brother. “Have you said that to him? Because I have, and he doesn’t care.” He gave Lily a pointed look. “I appreciate your visit. But there was no need. I am certain if you had asked Robert before you came here, he would have told you so.”

  “It’s a pity I couldn’t do that th
en,” she snapped back. Her body shook with anger. “As he has laid unconscious since the accident. I don’t believe you understand the gravity of his situation. He might not wake up.”

  “The doctor has said this?”

  “What?” She shook her head at his frank lack of concern. “He can’t say either way unless Robert awakes. But it’s been days, and he hasn’t stirred. Every day he grows paler, less…”

  Less Robert.

  “Robert made his preferences clear to me,” the Marquess said. “I assume he’s done the same with you, or you wouldn’t have moved out of your home.”

  “Marcus,” Cary snapped the word in surprise.

  “You and I both know it’s true, Cary.” He offered a short bow to Lily. “My apologies if I have offended. But I prefer to relay the truth, not falsehoods. With that in mind, I suggest you continue on with your life as intended.” With that, he turned toward the door.

  “You aren’t even going to go see him?” Horror filled her words.

  “My brother is too damned stubborn to die. Anything less wouldn’t warrant a change of heart.” He tossed the words over his shoulder and then he was gone.

  Her mouth ajar, she turned to Robert’s remaining brother. This wasn’t what was supposed to happen. They were supposed to take over, so she could be free of the need that pushed and prodded inside of her to stay at Robert’s side.

  “What about you?” she asked Cary. “Are you going to see him?”

  Cary ran a hand over his face. “Do you know the last time my brother and I spoke? He came to see Marcus the other day, but before that?”

  As he seemed to wait for an answer, she shook her head. “No.”

  “It was two years ago, almost to the day, when our mother died.”

  Two years ago.

  Something began to buzz inside of Lily.

  “Marcus came to the service.” Cary took a few steps toward the door and she followed. “You were there, but not standing with him. Am I recalling this right?”

  She looked down at her hands. “I wanted to be there with him, but he…he preferred that I remain with my family.”

  Cary did not seem surprised. “Robert said nothing throughout the service, not to anyone. Not as our mother was laid to rest. Not until after everyone had gone.”

  They moved into the hallway, toward the front door.

  “When it was just the three of us remaining…” Cary swallowed.

  “What?” Two years ago, his mother had died. Two years ago, their baby had died. On the same day? How had she not realized the connection? She knew his mother had died around the same time. She’d been too caught up in her own pain to think it through. When Robert had retreated from her, she’d focused on breathing in, breathing out, getting through the days without him.

  The fragile marriage they had made had disintegrated. It hadn’t occurred to her that he’d been in his own hell the entire time.

  “He broke down. In a way I had never seen him before, he cried like a child. As he stood at her grave, he demanded to know why she didn’t love him, all in the same breath he was damning her to hell.” He paused. “He talked about a baby.”

  The image of Robert kneeling at his mother’s gravesite, sobs pouring from him, was a visceral punch in the stomach. She ached for the pain they’d both been feeling, unable to reach for each other.

  “He blamed her for taking with her the one thing he wanted,” Cary continued. “For taking away the happiness he’d almost held. It made little sense, but he laid the blame at her feet. She caused so much of his pain, and his grief…it was so filled with anger. I never thought I would see that outpouring of emotion from him. I didn’t understand what he meant, but—Lily, were you with child?”

  “I was pregnant. I lost the baby.”

  Cary pressed a hand to his forehead. “The day my mother died, Robert showed on our doorstep. He was devastated, so lost. We had to tell him that she’d passed on. He didn’t take it well.” Understanding dawned in his eyes. “It was the same day, wasn’t it?”

  “I didn’t know then,” she murmured, as though it would change their past, change their inability to help each other through their grief. “Robert never talked to me about her, her life or her death.”

  “Our mother was not the easiest,” Cary admitted with a grimness that spoke of how little that statement revealed. He opened the front door. “She told Robert she never wanted him, it was an often sung refrain. He had very little love from her.” Regret crossed his face. “With our age difference…he was so young, a babe still. We wanted to spare him, protect him, so we kept him at a distance from her. I sent him away so often to get him out of her sight. I never noticed how much he was hurting until it was too late.”

  Cary shook his head as though to shake off the memories and they walked down the steps. “That day, he told us she had been all that bound us, and now that she was dead, he was free. He never looked back that day, and he hasn’t looked back since.”

  He’d freed himself from everyone, from everything, it would seem.

  “He’d never forgive me for telling you this.” Cary grimaced, sadness drawing his mouth downward. “I wanted you to understand why I believe he wouldn’t want us there when he awakens.”

  The sadness that shrouded him echoed the pressure inside her chest, and she nodded. She understood.

  “He is a complicated man.” He patted her shoulder awkwardly. “You should do as my brother suggested. Go on with your life. Find some happiness where you can.”

  The weight on Lily’s heart grew heavier, and a lump formed in her throat. Robert’s own brother wouldn’t fight for him. It was clear he didn’t believe Robert offered anything Lily should fight for, either.

  “Thank you for…well, trying. But in future, do not waste your time on attempting to right the wrongs in his life.” He opened the door to her carriage, and helped Lily in.

  The door began to close and Lily thrust a hand against it. “Wait.”

  Cary looked in. “What is it?”

  “Don’t give up on him.” She heard the hypocrisy in her plea. “He shouldn’t be alone. Not now. You’re his family.”

  Cary didn’t say anything, just looked away. “Good day, Lady Melrose.”

  The firm click of the door sounded with a finality that disappointed. She had come here to pass Robert along to his family and be free of him, and yet that option had been yanked away. While advising her to abandon Robert, Cary had made it impossible for her to do so.

  The missing pieces of her life, the years Robert had abandoned her, were starting to form together into a sad picture. While the image of his grief devastated her, it also formed a rebellious thread of hope. He’d grieved their loss. He’d thought they were on the cusp of happiness.

  Lily lifted the latch to open the door at the top so she could speak to the driver.

  “Rose street, please.”

  At his mumbled acknowledgement, she sat back in her seat. She had a choice.

  But the only one that felt right meant staying by his side until he recovered. Or until he didn’t.

  Twenty minutes later, she stood at the front door of the house she shared with Robert. She stared at the door. It was ordinary, nothing spectacular. A deep shade of blue. A nice wood.

  Yet, somehow, each time she had walked out of that door of late, and back in again, something drastic had shifted in her life. With all she’d learned from Robert’s brothers, she was beginning to feel as though the ground was made of sand, and she’d been caught in a windstorm.

  Here she was again. Walking in.

  Or rather, standing in front of.

  “My lady, did you wish to go in?” Anna asked.

  “One minute, please.”

  Anna didn’t question it, and Lily adored her for it.

  What if Robert never woke up?

  What if he did?

  Her emotions were a dozen balls of string rolled and rolled again into one hot mess that made little sense. Before long, she might think
daytime was night and the sun was the moon.

  The nip in the air urged her inward, so she took a deep breath and entered the door, braced for what came next.

  Inside, she stopped. She couldn’t explain it, but her body tensed. The somber presence she’d left had shifted, changed.

  Mrs. Tandy ran down the stairs. “You’re back,” the older woman managed between huffs of breath. “Thank God.”

  Alarm filled Lily. Had the men come back?

  Mrs. Tandy beckoned her up the stairs. “It’s Mr. Melrose.”

  “Has he worsened?”

  “I can’t say.”

  Dread filled her feet with rocks as Lily trudged up toward Robert’s room. She wasn’t going to wait for an explanation. She braced herself for the worst.

  Once inside Robert’s room, she came to a halt.

  Robert stood next to the bed.

  Awake.

  “I tried to keep him in bed, milady. But he refused. He woke up briefly a while ago, so Edwin went to get the doctor. I think he needed the air.”

  At the words, Robert turned around to face them. Lily frowned, not sure what set her on edge.

  Even fresh from an accident, he looked at her with the blankness of a stranger, as though he’d never seen her before.

  “You should be resting.” Lily moved in the room but stopped at a good distance away. He didn’t say a word, though that wasn’t an odd occurrence.

  “Robert, please,” she implored, the use of his name foreign on her tongue. Though she often berated him in her mind using his given name, she didn’t give voice to that intimacy. “You must lie down.”

  “What happened to me?” His brows furrowed as he spoke, turning his head around the room. “Where am I?”

  “Your bedchamber.” A thread of concern wound through her, but she shooed him toward the bed. “Now that you’re awake, we’ll bring the doctor back and—”

  He raised a hand, pressed it to his temple. “My head feels like it’s going to break into two.”

  “You’ve been in an accident. You really shouldn’t be up until the doctor has examined you. Especially after—”