Healing Hearts 1 Warrior Angel

by Dixie Lynn Dwyer

“What?”

  “Oh yeah, we heard some stories about your college days and when Mike visited Afina,” Zayn told her.

  “Were you a wild thing in college?” Thermo asked, still no real facial expression. Just cold, dark, mysterious to someone unknown to military men who experienced war. She knew though, and she wasn’t interested in any games they were playing.

  “Well, I’m sure he told you I had a boyfriend through college.”

  “He did. A soldier, right?” Zayn asked.

  She felt the tears reach her eyes and turned away.

  Zayn’s hand went to her shoulder and he squeezed it. “It isn’t easy dating a soldier, especially active duty and a Marine,” Zayn said to her.

  “I’d rather not talk about it. In fact. I think I’m going to go join my friends. It was nice meeting you, Thermo. Enjoy the evening.” She put her drink down.

  Zayn pulled her close and whispered into her ear. “I wish you would stay and talk. You’re so easy to talk to.”

  She closed her eyes and willed the attraction away. It wasn’t right. She promised to never love again. To focus on saving lives and not getting caught up in the drama and the fears.

  “I’m not interested, Zayn. There are plenty of other women around here that would love to talk to you and your brother. Have a good night.” She pushed away from him and walked away. What she hadn’t expected was to feel guilty and disappointed. Where did these men come from? Maybe it was time to call it a night.

  * * * *

  “What did you say to scare her away?” Selasi asked, passing by Kai as she walked away. His brother smiled and winked, but Kai kept walking. Zayn wondered why.

  “He was pushy,” Thermo said, and then reached for a bottle of Bud Light and took a sip, his eyes on both Selasi and Zayn.

  “She’s so beautiful. I don’t think I have ever met a woman with eyes like hers,” Zayn said. He couldn’t believe how attracted to her he was. It was instant, too. That long reddish-brown hair that cascaded down her back and over her shoulders in abundant curls. Then the color of her eyes, so blue, and enhanced by her thick eyelashes and perfect face. Her skin was flawless, and she smelled so good. Holy crap he was fantasizing about the woman. Still thinking about her even though she wasn’t right here. She basically blew him and his brothers off. His brothers. He looked at Selasi and Thermo.

  “You think she’s hot? You felt an attraction?” he asked both of them.

  “Every fucking guy in this place would find her attractive, Zayn,” Selasi said, and then took a slug of beer from the bottle he held.

  “No. That isn’t what I mean,” Zayn said, and looked around the place in search of Kai again. His brothers remained silent. Zayn was interested in Kai and instead of telling his brothers his plan, he held it inside and hoped she would show up at the barbeque tomorrow.

  Chapter Four

  Amelia was walking down the street a block from her house when she heard her cell phone ring. She hoped that it wasn’t Afina and the girls again trying to get her to show up at the barbecue at Mike’s place. She wasn’t really in the mood to socialize, and was feeling so burnt out and frustrated about breaking up with Cavanaugh. Her head was fuzzy and nothing was really worth focusing on. She pulled her cell phone out of her bag and answered it. “Hello?”

  “Hey, baby.”

  She gasped. Her heart felt as if it stopped beating. Why was he calling her? What did he want? She was so damn scared of him. Afraid of his fierce temper and of course his hard hands.

  “Talk to me. I miss you, honey. I want to see you.”

  “No,” she said, but her voice cracked, the emotion, the fear obvious and he knew it. She could see that smug expression, the way he would know she was scared of him and anything he said or did to her lasted hours, even days. He was a monster.

  “Don’t…don’t say no. I know you miss me.” He started the sentence so fierily, she thought for sure that he would start yelling, but he didn’t. It was like the last several arguments they had over the phone where he couldn’t reach out, grab her by her hair, or her neck under her hair and press her to him as he whispered harshly against her ear. She shivered, but she didn’t hang up. She couldn’t hang up. She feared him and her body began to shake.

  “I don’t want any trouble, Cavanaugh.”

  “Then meet me. Invite me over. Let’s talk.”

  “I’m not talking to you. You don’t know how to talk, only use your power.”

  “I’m getting tired of this shit, Amelia. Tired of these fucking games. So I hit you. Get over it. You should know better than to flirt with those soldiers that come into that place.”

  “I wasn’t flirting with anyone.”

  “Bullshit!!” He screamed into the phone and she panicked. She ended the call and then regretted it. The old familiar sensations invaded her mind and she started to cry. She placed her hand over her heart and felt the panic attack begin. She was so fucked up. So screwed because of this man and his abuse. She sat in an office that helped people get over fears, anxiety, stress, and yet here she was drowning in her fears. Scared to even go out at night because Cavanaugh could be waiting for her.

  Would he go that far? He left her alone all week. She started to pace her apartment. Should she call the police? Call Kai or Afina? God, Afina will tell her to come over. Hell, she would send Mike or one of the guys. God forbid she sent Fogerty. Oh God.

  She thought of him. A mercenary. A gorgeous, rugged, intimidating man who was mysterious and was the center of her fantasies. A fantasy she held on to and needed to get over Cavanaugh. To try and put the fears Cavanaugh placed in her behind her, but that was all it was. She would be so embarrassed if Fogerty knew she was abused by her boyfriend and was weak, easily manipulated and so much more. Maybe she needed to consider leaving Mercy, hell leave South Carolina entirely.

  More tears flowed and she went toward the window. She was on the fourth floor and she peaked outside. She looked for Cavanaugh’s blue pickup truck. She knew the sound of the diesel engine and the way the muffler rattled so it made a cool sound. She used to think he was amazing. No, he was a monster. Her cell phone rang but this time she didn’t answer it. Instead she ignored it and cried. She wasn’t going anywhere tonight. She was staying home, with the door locked, and the phone and bat by her bed.

  Please don’t let him come here tonight. Please keep him away from me. Please.

  * * * *

  “You’re still coming over, right?” Afina asked Kai. Kai exhaled and Afina whined over the phone. “Come on, please. You can’t leave me with all these damn men. I’ll go out of my mind. I need reinforcements. You, Sally, Mel, and Amelia, although she might be a no-show. I called her twice and texted several times and she said she had a bad headache.

  “So maybe she does.”

  “Well, you come over, and bring that special guacamole dip you make so well.”

  Kai chuckled. I’m not sure it’s a good idea.”

  “Why the hell not?”

  “Uhmm, I don’t know.”

  “Oh…so Mike was right. Holy shit. You sure do know how to pick men to get back into the dating scene with.”

  “What?”

  Afina chuckled. “Don’t “what” me girl. I saw your eyes widen at the sight of Zayn. He is gorgeous, and then Selasi and Thermo. Hell, Thermo doesn’t react or talk to anyone. They couldn’t take their eyes off of you either.”

  “Oh no. Then I am definitely not coming over.”

  “You have to.”

  “I don’t have to do anything. I’m perfectly fine not placing myself into an uncomfortable situation.”

  “Sweetie, those men are gorgeous, and so damn intimidating, of course you’re a chicken.”

  “A chicken? Afina?” Kai scolded her.

  Afina laughed. “I get your fears, honey, but I have to say I have never seen you look at any man who has tried hitting on you the way you looked at them. I think they were affected by you, as well.”

  “I’m not interested in
dating anyone or entertaining some little attraction. Of course any woman would feel aroused by them and their good looks and bodies.”

  “Aroused? Oh wow, you really do like them. This is so awesome.”

  “No, not awesome.”

  “Yes, completely.”

  “I’m not coming over.”

  “Yes, you are. Be here by two, and don’t forget the guac!”

  * * * *

  “I’m at my wit’s end, Chadwick. My brother and his wife have tried everything. It’s one of those tough cases. The kind that no one seems to be able to handle.”

  “I understand, John. I do, but have you reached out to Guardians Hope?” Chadwick asked, instantly thinking of Kai Devaro as he held the phone to his ear. She was truly an amazing woman and dedicated to helping soldiers like Kenny.

  “I have, Chadwick. Kenny was seeing someone there and then he stopped going, and started to become irate again. He can get violent. My sister in law has suffered his wrath before. My brother and his wife don’t want to kick him out but it is getting to be too much. They have concerns for their own children.”

  “Understandable. He needs more help, perhaps medical first, to help deal with the anger issues.”

  “They come out of nowhere. He can be perfectly calm and then suddenly he snaps. He was doing well for months. We just don’t understand why he snapped.”

  “Well, why don’t I give my friend a call? She created Guardians Angels. She knows not only what to do for Kenny, but she’ll help get things moving quickly.”

  “Thank you so much. My brother and his wife will be relieved.”

  “I’ll be in touch,” Chadwick said, and then ended the call.

  He looked up at the clock. It was four in the afternoon on a Saturday, but Kai wouldn’t mind. She had a huge heart.

  * * * *

  “I’m so glad you came. See, it isn’t so bad, and I caught you checking out Zayn before when he wasn’t looking,” Afina said to Kai.

  Kai pushed her hair to one side and she shook her head. “I wasn’t staring.”

  “Honey, you are interested and I think it’s great. Why are you fighting it?”

  “Afina, we’ve been over this before. I’m not interested in dating anyone, getting close to anyone or taking any chances on one man never mind multiple, and…never mind military and police.”

  “That’s stupid, and you’re good with men like that. You understand their stresses and the pressure they are under. I think it is inevitable. You’ll wind up falling in love with a soldier, a cop, or close to it. I guarantee it.”

  “Love again? Never,” she said, and then her cell phone rang. Afina took a sip of her tropical drink as Kai glanced at her cell phone.

  “Who is it?”

  “Chadwick.” She excused herself just as Zayn and Mike were approaching.

  “Who is that?” Mike asked.

  “Dr. Hayes,” Afina said, and Mike made a noise but Kai walked away from them to answer the call.

  “Hello, Chadwick, how are you?” she asked, walking toward the far patio and a bench that was there. No one was over there right now so she had some privacy.

  “Hello, Kai, so nice to hear your voice. I’m not bothering you, am I?” he asked in that very distinguished, almost arrogant tone. He spoke with his nose sort of in the air but not really. It was hard to describe. He could be a bit arrogant, but he was the top emergency surgeon in the United States so why not?

  “I’m just at a friend’s house for a barbecue.”

  “How nice. I won’t keep you long. I have a friend who needs some guidance for his nephew. Perhaps we can meet up tomorrow and talk about it?”

  “I have plans tomorrow with Canton and the family. Maybe I can call you if I get back early enough.”

  “You’re so busy. No wonder we can never coordinate a dinner date.”

  “Chadwick.”

  “I know, you don’t date, but I was hoping to change your mind. We’d be good together.”

  “There is more to a relationship than the public’s perception of it,” she replied.

  “True, but my attraction to you goes beyond image.”

  She didn’t know what to say. He was being very forward and she didn’t have the same feelings for him.

  “I’ve silenced you and that isn’t my intention. Call me when you have a chance to talk. This soldier needs services. He walked out on the therapist several times at Guardians Hope.”

  “So he is already in the system with us?” she asked, her care for this unknown soldier immediate. These were the ones who needed the most help before it was too late. She pushed for more information and he explained a bit.

  “I will get the ball rolling. See if his parents can get him to attend the session on Tuesday. I’ll do what I can.”

  “You mean you’ll show up and help him personally?”

  “I’ll try. Hopefully I can convince him that he needs the help he does.”

  “You’re an angel, Kai.”

  She needed the call a few seconds later and then placed her hands on the stone wall and looked out toward the yard. She could hear music and laughter behind her, but her focus always went back to that lonely feeling in her gut. The emptiness from losing Edison.

  “Important phone call?” She gasped and turned to see Zayn standing there holding two drinks. A tropical one and a bottle of Bud Light.

  “Sort of.” She gave a soft smile.

  “Here, Afina sent me over with it.” He handed her the glass and she took it. “To making new friends,” he said, and they clinked glasses.

  She couldn’t help but to take in his features, and find him completely attractive, sexy, and everything a man should be. She didn’t want to compare him to Edison. They were different, all men were, but the things she found attractive about Zayn were different than Edison. Of course looks were initially what drew her in, but it was Zayn’s eyes, that rugged look about him, yet his beard was well trimmed and short, unlike Thermo’s.

  She stopped herself. What the hell was she thinking? She turned to look back toward the yard.

  “They have a nice place,” Zayn said, and she felt him step closer.

  “They sure do. I don’t know how they leave it,” she said to him.

  “I’m sure it’s tough when they have to go, but they probably focus on returning. I definitely don’t miss any of that.”

  She glanced over her shoulder at him, then turned toward him as she leaned against the stone wall. “You miss it?”

  He stepped closer and held her gaze. “I miss some parts of it. The camaraderie, the danger, helping other friends and being a part of something so great and patriotic.”

  “That’s understandable. I’m sure it’s difficult to transition back into civilian life, but you seem to be doing fine.”

  “I’m doing great and so are my brothers. It took some time to get used to things. We don’t slack in anything really.”

  She took a sip of her drink and stared up into his dark blue eyes.

  “Like what?”

  “Making the beds, keeping the house clean, organizing responsibilities around the house and at work. Our jobs still incorporate our training and our experiences.”

  “Do you think that’s important when trying to get back into a routine as a civilian? Finding a job, or responsibility that incorporates the training and discipline? Like maybe it’s necessary to survive?”

  He stared at her. “You’re always thinking, aren’t you? About ways to help soldiers heal?”

  She felt a little embarrassed. She didn’t mean to ask questions like she was analyzing him. She tightened up when she felt his fingers under her chin. He was in front of her now and she just stared up at him, shocked at the attraction she felt.

  “You’re so damn beautiful.”

  “Zayn,” she said his name and went to turn, but he cupped her cheek, stepping even closer to her.

  “I know you feel the attraction.”

  He released her cheek and lowered his h
and to her hip. “Talk to me. I want to get to know you.”

  “As friends, Zayn, that’s fine.”

  She could feel him stroking her hip, and then his fingers grazed under her top to her skin. Her lips parted. She gasped.

  “You feel it. Don’t be afraid of me.”

  As she looked at him and imagined being held by Zayn, kissed by Zayn, she panicked. She pressed away, nearly spilling her drink.

  “Is it the doctor? The guy you were just talking to? The one who wants you in his bed?” he asked her and she was shocked.

  She squinted at him.

  “What?”

  “Afina said the doctor wants you in his bed.”

  “Afina has a big mouth. She shouldn’t say things like that, and no, it isn’t the doctor, Zayn. It’s me.” She felt the tears fill her eyes. She took a deep breath and he took her hand. He brought it to his lips and softly kissed her knuckles.

  “I’m willing to wait. To take my time and go slow if that’s what you need. If you aren’t attracted to me, because you’re so gorgeous and can get any guy you want, so why pick one like me, I get it.”

  She was surprised by his words. She put her drink down and then reached for his arm. “No. No, Zayn, that isn’t it at all. I…I’m incapable of opening up my heart to another man.”

  He shook his head, brought her hand to his chest and reached out and stroked her hair as he shook his head. “You’re just scared. I get it. Let’s just hang out and be friends for now. Whatever happens, happens.”

  She was relieved that he didn’t push for more. Yet part of her felt like she could tell him why she wouldn’t accept his advances. Then of course there was the part of her that wanted to feel him close, feel Zayn’s lips against hers. She needed to slow things down. Then she heard Selasi’s voice as he joined them.

  “What do we have going on over here, a private party?” he asked.

  “No, I was just talking Kai into a game of pool.”

  “Pool, huh? I want in on this. We doing partners or one on one?” he asked, and looked her over. Selasi was definitely a flirt.