Truth & Consequences: A Miss Independent Novel

by Leach, Kiki

  She scoffed and turned away from him. “I told you that I would’ve let you in my pants if it would’ve spared me the public FODDER!”

  “Stop it, alright?” he said. “Just stop. That’s not what things were like between us then and you damn well know it. You’re only saying all of this shit because you’re pissed and I get it, V. I get it. I know that what I did really screwed you over, but that was never my intent. And I never did what I did to get inside your pants. You damn well know that to be true too.”

  “How do I know anything anymore? Here I was scared the fuck out of my mind of how you would react in learning the truth about Adrian and the fact that I was pregnant with and lost HIS child. And for years, YEARS you have kept this secret to yourself, knowing how inside out my life had become because of it, KNOWING that I have hated every second of being in the limelight, not because of my mother or because of the magazine, but because my boyfriend decided that he liked having sex with my best friend more than me.”

  She swerved around him and shuffled to the other side.

  “All the comparisons to me and Sheila over the years really fucked with my psyche,” she said. “Rags saying this and that about our appearances and why Nathan might have left me for her and on and on and on. It wasn’t just about what he had done or that it became public. It was everything else that came along with that shit. Just finding out that you were the reason it did--”

  He slid around the table and sat back down in front of her, taking her tiny hands in his again and remembering how it felt the first time he held them. “I never meant to hurt you,” he said. “This was never about hurting you, it was about hurting them because of what they did to you.”

  “It doesn’t matter, Mo. Because in the end, we all got screwed over because of it.” She ripped her hands from his and got up again. Resting them on the window sill, she struggled with her feelings, of both loving and hating him at the same time. The only other time she had had such strong feelings for a man was when she found Nathan in that shower. But even then, even that didn’t seem to hit her as hard as this. “I need you to go.”

  Maurice shook his head and chewed his lips. He was determined. She was his; it took him a long ass time to make it happen and there was no way in hell the mistake he made years ago was going to be the one thing to tear down everything he had built up in bringing them exactly where he always felt they were supposed to be, together.

  “No,” he told her. He moved over to her side. She kept her eyes locked on the window but felt his presence the moment the air in the room shifted. “No. I’m not leaving my own house, Vanessa.”

  She looked up into his eyes, the same eyes she loved with her entire being, the same eyes that made her heart swell before bursting into then thousand pieces inside her chest. She wanted to forgive what he had done. God, did she want to forgive him for the lies and deceit and the betrayal of trust. She knew that what he had done was for her. Despite her anger and how much she wanted to hate him for it, she knew that if it hadn’t been for the sole purpose of making Nathan and Sheila look like the villains they had become, he would’ve kept his mouth shut about it, just as she wanted.

  But what happened after that, everything that culminated between not only them but the entire group, everything she suffered because of that information leaking out to the public, was something that she couldn’t find in that same heart that loved him so much to forgive. At least not that night.

  “V.” He reached out for her, but she flinched and stepped back.

  “Leave,” she told him.

  “Vanessa…”

  Scrunching his brows, he sniffed and returned to her eyes. He wanted her to look at him so badly, but knew that if she did, there would be nothing but pain and fury in return. It was as if she had taken his heart and twisted it in knots before slamming it back inside his chest. Seeing how angry she was with him, knowing that it could’ve been prevented if he had just waited out his time, waited out his chance to finally be with her; it almost made him sick to his stomach to know just how much he had truly fucked up a damn good thing.

  “Vanessa,” he said again. “I have waited since we were kids to be with you – when I wasn’t even sure what love was, but felt whatever I thought it was for you. I was selfish for what I did. I was arrogant and stupid and more than that, I was wrong. But what we have is deep. It’s real and it’s honest and it’s raw. Sometimes it’s angry, but it’s the best and worst part of who we both are. You stole a part of me years ago and you’ve never given it back and I know that after the last few months of us being together that I’ve done the same for you – a big part that I refuse to return no matter how much you might beg for it later. You can’t just walk away from this; what we have isn’t just something that you can toss into the trash without a real fight for it. We’ve been through too much shit together for that.”

  “Maurice--”

  “I’m not Nathan. I’m not just going to pack up my bags and leave you in this city alone, hoping that someday I’ll be able to move on from everything we shared together while secretly hoping that you never do.”

  Her lip quivered. She wiped away the fallen tears as they spilled out in copious amounts and flooded her cheeks.

  “You still feel this,” he said. “It’s not something that’s just going to go away overnight no matter how angry you are.”

  “Of course it’s not just going to go away overnight,” she snapped. “I’ll probably love you for the rest of my life, more than Nathan and Adrian or any other man I ever thought I loved before now. THAT is what makes this hurt even more.” She shoved past him and headed for the coatrack near the door, grabbing her jacket.

  Maurice chased after her. “What are you doing?”

  “I’m leaving. Of all the people in my life, your love is the last that I thought would ever cause me the most pain.”

  That jarred something within him as he thought back on his earlier conversation with Melanie.

  She slipped on her jacket and lifted her hair from beneath the collar. She turned to look at him as he stood in the frame of the doorway and glowered.

  “I need to get the hell away from you right now. But since you won’t go anywhere, I’m taking the initiative and getting the hell out of here before my head explodes.”

  “You need some time away from me, and I understand that. But I’m still going to be here when you get back,” he said.

  “Do me a favor and don’t.” She grabbed her keys from the small table and slammed the door behind her. It was only then that she completely broke down in uncontrollable, shaking tears.

  When she heard his feet sliding toward the door, she took off down the stairs and ran down the sidewalk as fast as she could before rounding a corner. She didn’t know where the hell she was going or when she would get there, but she knew that after that fight, there would be no turning back for either one of them.

  Part Eight

  After making love more times than they could count on both hands and feet combined, Nikki rolled off of Oscar and back onto the floor of the bedroom she currently shared with William.

  As she rolled her eyes up toward the ceiling, Oscar placed a finger at the center of her chin to keep her head steady, then leaned in and glided his tongue up and down the side of her throat. She giggled as the sensation tickled her skin.

  Though there was a part of her that felt extreme guilt for not only what she had done and with who, but just where they had done it and why, it seemed to be overshadowed by the exuberance of the act itself burning throughout her entire body, as well as his.

  Even while knowing that it was only a matter of time before William returned, she still couldn’t seem to bring herself to tell Oscar to go, because she feared, even after all he had said and all they had done, that he could suddenly change his mind; if he walked out of her life again, if by choice or fate, there was no way in hell anything would ever be the same for her again, and she knew it, and it scared the living shit out of her – more than
William possibly finding them there, wrapped up in each other like two frazzled bows beneath a wrecked Christmas tree.

  As she lifted her head and stared up at the clock, Oscar did the same, then looked over at her and grinned.

  “This is the longest we’ve ever been horizontal,” she said as he wrapped a hand around her shoulders and pulled her close. She slightly turned and tucked her head beneath his chin. “Tell me this wasn’t a mistake. That I didn’t give myself to you again only to be crushed by--”

  “It wasn’t a mistake,” he told her. “It’s not a mistake. The only mistakes we can make now are staying with the people that we know we shouldn’t.”

  She rested an arm on his chest and drove her fingers up and down against his thin hairs. “You want me to end things with William,” she said.

  “That goes without saying, Nik.”

  “Maybe for you, but, not for me. I can’t do that. I won’t.” She got up from the floor and crossed the room. She grabbed one of her oversized PJ shirts and slipped it over her head.

  A conflicted Oscar sat up and stared at her. “What?” he asked.

  “You want me to end things with a man who is literally helping me to build up my career. I’m nowhere near being established yet. I can’t just dump him out of the blue while I’m still playing someone’s understudy. And I’m sure as hell not going to dump him while you’re still married.”

  “Then you’re keeping him your pimp slash contingency plan?”

  She reached for her phone to check for any missed calls and snickered. “Between all of that good sex, I almost forgot how much of an el pito you could be when it’s not being used to satisfy me.” When she saw no missed calls, she threw the phone onto the bed and looked back at him.

  “Do you trust me when I tell you that I’m officially leaving Melanie?” he asked, holding his hand out for her. She took it with caution and got back down on the floor in front of him.

  “I want to,” she said. “I’m trying. But your track record is hazy.”

  “I’m trying to fix that.” He leaned in and skimmed his mouth up and down the front of her throat.

  She moved her fingers into his hair and laughed. “And so far you are doing fantastico. But, it doesn’t mean that I’ve suddenly stopped caring about William,” she told him. And instantly, he pulled back. “I’m sorry. I know that this isn’t something you want to hear right now, if ever, but it’s true. I don’t just think of him as someone who can buy me nice things and get me a job. He actually respects me as a person, and as a woman and believes in me and my craft.”

  “And I don’t?” he replied.

  “I never once said that you didn’t.”

  Oscar turned his eyes toward the floor. “You’re staying with him out of fear,” he said.

  “And if I am,” she started, “it’s only because you’re the reason it’s there to begin with.”

  They looked into one another’s eyes for a long time, studying, imagining, attempting to understand.

  Oscar understood her fear. He understood the reason behind it. He didn’t understand why that reason had to cost him the only thing he felt had been worth fighting for.

  As he leaned in to kiss her, they heard a loud clanking-clacking noise coming from downstairs.

  Jerking back, Nikki’s eyes expanded by the second like two flying saucers when she realized it had been the front door opening and closing shut.

  “Dios Mio.” Her voice was so light, Oscar barely understood either word she said.

  “Hey, Nikki!” William hollered from downstairs. “I’ve brought someone back with me that I really want you to meet.”

  She quickly scrambled from the floor, all the while slipping on the sheet still wrapped around Oscar’s waist. As she fumbled and struggled to get to her feet, he tried to catch her to keep her from falling flat on her face.

  Downstairs, William waited with his daughter in the living room. Exhausted from their long ride back from Connecticut, she had crawled onto the couch and began dozing off. William stared at her, smiling, then fixed himself a drink. While sipping back his cognac, he rested a warm, comforting hand against his daughter’s face and brushed his fingers back into the sandy brown curls of her hair. Once she began to snore, he chuckled to himself and gently tapped the edge of her nose with his finger.

  When he heard a loud thumping sound coming from up above his head, he looked up toward the ceiling and saw a slight rattling motion in his chandelier. Not wanting to wake up his daughter, he sat his glass of bourbon down on the bar and headed out of the living room, through the foyer and upstairs.

  Racing as fast as he could into his bedroom, Nikki froze in place with Oscar standing before her as she heard William’s footsteps getting closer and closer to the room.

  She looked around as fast as she could and pointed toward the closet in the corner. “HIDE!” she whispered. “I don’t know who he has waiting downstairs, but if he catches you in here, he won’t care.”

  Oscar had no time to argue as Nikki quickly grabbed his clothes from the floor and stuffed them in his hands. As the door started creaking back, she opened the closet as fast as she could and viciously shoved Oscar inside. His head bounced back against the wall, but he tried to keep the sound of pain he made as quiet as possible. He wasn’t exactly into hiding anymore, but knew that coming out to William in his own house, let alone in his own bedroom in which they had just had an unbelievably amount of gratuitous sex probably wasn’t exactly the best time or place to stake his claim.

  The moment William walked inside, Nikki turned from the closet and smiled.

  “Hey!” she said, doing her damnedest to pretend that all was well.

  William noticed something different about the room, the entire atmosphere as well as the vibe was off in so many ways, but he couldn’t exactly explain why or when it might have happened.

  When Nikki raced over and wrapped her hands around his neck, holding him tightly, he wrapped his around her waist and kissed her throat. His eyes closed as he inhaled her and she sat back quick, remembering that she smelled more like Oscar than herself.

  She gently pushed William’s arms down from her waist and took his hands instead.

  “Where in the world have you been all day?”

  William stared at her for a few seconds before shaking his head of suspicion and answering. “That’s what I was calling you about downstairs. Didn’t you hear me?”

  “I did,” she said. “But I…” She looked down at herself. “I needed something to wear before I walked out of this room.”

  He stood back and eyed her from head to toe. “I don’t remember that shirt being inside my closet.”

  “It’s in a place you’d never think to look, in the very back.”

  “I might need to do that sometime,” he said. “Just to see what all is in there.”

  A concerned Nikki could feel her throat actually closing up the longer they stayed in that room. Hives were bound to spread between them at any moment.

  “What was it that you wanted to show me downstairs?” she asked, leading him toward the door.

  “A who,” he said. He glanced back into the room one last time before taking her down.

  As soon as they were gone, Oscar quickly dressed himself and climbed out of the nearest and lowest window he could find.

  Once they reached downstairs, William tightened his hand around Nikki’s and brought her into the living room. He tapped a sleeping Corrinne on her shoulder and she rolled over on her side, rubbing her eyes, but never actually opened them.

  Nikki bent down to get a good look at her face. Her mocha skin was so smooth that she almost looked like a real live Kenya doll.

  “She’s beautiful,” said Nikki.

  William nodded in agreement. “I’m hoping to have a few more just like her one day,” he said.

  Nikki only smiled, refusing to say a word of it. William had yet to know about the fact that she had no desire to have children with anyone. The closet ever being
with Oscar and even then, she wasn’t prepared, which resulted in her eventual abortion. The only person who ever knew aside from her doctor, was Maurice. She was determined to take it to the grave with her outside of that because she knew that judgment was equivalent to being stoned alive.

  Nikki leaned into William’s ear. “What happened out there?” she asked. “Why did you have to go out there and get her?”

  “My ex-wife refused to be specific,” he said. “Only telling me that I was needed and Corrinne wanted me there. We got into an argument, which got pretty ugly, which is why Corrinne is here tonight. And will probably be here for a good long while until this custody battle between us is finally resolved. I hope that doesn’t bother you too much.”

  It did bother her, immensely, but seeing as how she wasn’t expected to pay rent or bills or much of anything unless it was something that she wanted to do, it made remaining there with him bearable in comparison to living with Vanessa and her ‘rules’.

  “By the way,” he started, picking up his glass of bourbon. “On the way back home, I got a call about Sharon, the woman you’re an understudy for, and was informed that she suddenly dropped out to take the lead role in a feature film that starts shooting in LA next week. Which means that you have now officially landed the part of Glinda.” He arched his brows and took a sip from his glass.

  Nikki brought her hands together and bit down on her bottom lip, then pointed at herself. “I’m officially Glinda in ‘Wicked’.”

  “As long as you want it, the role is yours.”

  “As long as I want it? As long as I want it?” She squealed and threw her arms around William’s neck.

  He laughed while holding onto her, though both tried to remain quiet to keep from waking Corrinne.

  He sat his glass down again and dragged her into the foyer. “In honor of this, with the play officially starting in a month, I want to have a party for you on opening night. One including people like Vanessa and Maurice as well as some industry professionals that I think you’d do well in working with for future projects. None of those people will include Alexis,” he said. “After what happened last night, I think it’s best that we all keep our distance for a while.”