by Mann, Cat
My arms and legs were like sticks, fragile and frail. My left arm and the fingers of my left hand were swollen and liquid oozed from them. I looked again in the mirror. My sunken eyes were rimmed by bruised purple flesh and bits of blood stained my hair. My neck was bright red and the flesh there was raw and meaty.
Aggie watched me watch myself and her tears threatened to roll down her cheeks.
“We’ll get you cleaned up, Ava Baby, and you will feel so much better,” Aggie said, her voice full of sorrow and love as she tried to reassure me. I think that perhaps she was trying to reassure herself.
Aggie knew I had issues with close contact and with modesty, so she made quick work of helping me wash. Over and over she had to wipe tears from her cheeks with the backs of her hands. She washed and rinsed my hair, then wrapped a big towel around me. Aggie started on my hair. She brushed the long strands carefully with long, soft strokes that were soothing for both of us. She was quiet as she helped me get dressed in a loose white tee and a pair of Ari’s sweats. She even pulled up the legs the way I like them and rolled down the waistband.
“You know me well,” I said, smiling at her.
“I like to think so,” she said, returning my smile. As we finished, there was a knock at the door and Miss Tooth came in to replace the dressings on my burnt fingers and on the slash in my arm.
When she opened the bathroom door, Ari was there, pacing the floor. He stopped as she slipped past him and looked at me. Relief washed over his face. He wrapped his arm around me and helped me to my bed. He peppered my face with kisses as he lay back down next to me. Julia, Lauren, Gianna and Aggie were in the room. He tuned them out almost as though none of them existed for him now that I was near.
“They got our lab results back today,” he whispered. I could tell the others were straining to hear his words, but they were meant only for me as he whispered them almost soundlessly into my ear.
I drew in a sharp, painful breath. Ari held me more closely and more gently.
“We’re good; nobody there but you and me.” Tears ran down my face and then down his.
“Oh, Ari, I am so sorry this happened.”
“No one is sorrier than I am, Baby. I should never have let you out of my sight.”
****
I stayed in the hospital for a week for observation and evaluation. As the days went by, I remembered more and more of my past. My mother’s death, Mia’s death, my time in the dorm – these all came back to me. I was able to remember Rory before he visited me and he responded with a delighted smile; not that his self-esteem needed any help at all... just like old times. I laughed and rolled my eyes at everything he said. He told us that that Miike Snow was coming to L.A. in a few months and that he was going to get all of us tickets to the concert. I said I would believe that when I saw the tickets in his hand.
Chapter 4
Setback
Ari and I spent the first week after I was finally released at home together with the doors locked. I was unceasingly tired and often fell asleep next to Ari on the couch, waking several hours later to find myself surrounded by the billowy blankets and pillows on our bed with Ari still at my side.
My body slowly started to heal. My ribs ached almost all of the time, but my wrist was starting to feel a little better, turning from red to pink as the healing went on -- there would definitely be a scar and I was dealing with some Ulnar nerve damage. The tips of the fingers on my left hand were ultra-sensitive and I could hardly bear to touch anything. My head hurt, but the throbbing started to ebb to a dull twinge.
Late one evening, Ari and I were wrapped up together on the couch, watching a movie. I giggled at something silly, he kissed me and that was all it took before we were completely carried away with our love for one another. Our kissing led to much more. Making love with Ari was just as wonderful as I had remembered. He was slow and cautious. The feelings he drew from me were powerful and lovely. I was careful to bite him only softly, and on his shoulder rather than his bottom lip.
Rolling me gently into the nook in his arm, Ari’s heart was beating rapidly and his skin was glistening. He held me for a while and rubbed his finger back and forth on my lips. Before long my side started to scream in protest and I had to sit up to give my ribs some relief. Our clothes were strewn carelessly about the floor, tables and even a lamp shade and I gave a hoarse giggle at the state of our living room.
“Thirsty?” Ari asked with a smile. I put my hands up to my throat and nodded in response. He grabbed a pair of boxers up off the floor and slipped them on. Yanking Ari’s tee-shirt from the table, I slipped it on over my head, followed him into the kitchen, and leaned up against the island. He filled two glasses full of filtered water and set them both down in front of us. I reached for a glass and suddenly horrible images of being held at gunpoint, having to decide which glass of water might contain poison, and which might be harmless flooded my mind.
I covered my mouth with my hand in horror and my eyes grew wide. My body shook and my stomach churned. I was filled with shock and fear, and Ari immediately took notice.
“Ava? Ava, what’s wrong?” he asked in a panic. I was too terrified to answer him; my eyes were glued on the glasses in front of me. Ari quickly picked them up and threw them into the sink. Water and shards of glass flew over the countertop. My knees grew weak and he rushed over to grab me before I collapsed to the floor.
“Oh, my God; oh, my God,” I repeated these words, this litany, over and over again as the panic and anxiety grew stronger inside me. Ari held me tight in his arms as we sat on the kitchen floor. Eventually, my breathing slowed and Ari put my face in his hands.
“Ava Baby, what happened? What do you remember?”
I shook my head. “I, I,” I stuttered, “I can’t. I’m sorry, Ari, but I can’t tell you.”
Ari looked hurt, but more than hurt, he looked worried.
“Ok,” he said simply as he picked me up off the floor and carried me to our bedroom. He held me all night long, patting my hair, and wiping my tears away as I cried.
At some point, sleep found me and my mind was busy with nightmares until the afternoon sun woke me. Ari was in the shower; I could hear the water running. Pulling myself out of bed, I headed to the kitchen. I was now exceedingly thirsty. The broken glass was gone, the water wiped up, our kitchen restored to its clean and tidy state. I opened the cabinet and found that all of our glasses had been replaced by red plastic cups. A small smile spread on my lips as I filled one with water.
I drank the cool water quickly and since I was in need of a shower, I went into the bathroom to join Ari. My bruises were more yellow than black and blue and I wasn’t nearly as scary looking as I had been a couple weeks ago. Our master bathroom was spacious. The floor was covered in large, dark slate tile. We had two big sinks and a long mirror that stretched across the wall. Fog on the mirror kept me from seeing my reflection.
We had a pretty cabinet on the wall to the left that held folded piles of thick, white towels. Two hooks held matching bathrobes. The shower was the centerpiece of the whole room. The shower doors were clear glass that opened French style. The handles were sleek and silver. The shower itself was very roomy and had three showerheads, one on each of the dark tiled walls. I opened the shower doors and walked in and Ari pulled me straight into his arms. He flipped the other two showerheads on, washed, and rinsed my hair, then my body with his clean smelling soap. His touch sent lovely tingles all over my skin. I closed my eyes and just let the feeling take over. Ari moved his fingers down to my swollen ribs.
“We should have never done that last night. I could have hurt you.”
“You didn’t hurt me, Ari. I needed you.”
I was surprised at the words that came out of my mouth. I had never been bold about sex, but my statement was true. I needed to feel him. I needed him to want me.
He turned the water off and wrapped me up in a robe, then started to put on his clothes.
Despite the setback, I had
had the night before, I wanted to be strong and move forward with my life. I did not want my fears to control me. I resisted the temptation to dress in Ari’s tee-shirt and boxers. Instead, I chose something much cuter and more appropriate for the middle of the day. I put on a little bit of makeup and sprayed some product on my hair to keep the frizz at bay, then met Ari out on the deck. He was sitting at the patio table reading the paper. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed him on the cheek. He pulled me around to face him and I curled up on his lap.
“So what do you want to do today?” I asked.
“Mmm…” he stopped reading to think.
“Actually, tomorrow is Lauren’s sixteenth birthday and I haven’t gotten her anything yet. I guess I kind of have to take care of that.”
“What are you going to get her, a new car?” I asked, teasing.
“Ha, no, my parents already took care of that,” he said as he rubbed the stubble on his cheeks.
“I have no clue about what I should get her.”
I stood up and grabbed his hand, pulling him up with me.
“I guess we’d better get started then.”
We hopped in Ari’s SUV and spent the better part of the late afternoon in local shops around Dana Point. Lauren was going to be moving to the dorms this year, so I got her some things for her dorm room and some new clothes for school. I went overboard, as usual, but she is really fun to shop for and her reactions when opening gifts are priceless.
After a lot of deliberation, Ari finally decided to get her a new surfboard. She was always complaining about having to use his old one. We stopped in Killer Dana Surf Shop, where Ari was greeted by each employee by name. Only they called him Are and not Ari. They did weird handshakes and talked surf lingo.
“Sup, Are? Gettin’ your babelini a board?” a tall, shaggy-haired, tan guy asked as he walked up to the two of us.
“Nah, she’s a gaper.” Ari ran his hand through his hair.
“You doin’ a gaper?” he said with a tsk.
“Ava is my wife. I’m here to get new gear for Lauren,” Ari answered.
The guy mumbled something about another one biting the dust.
Ari introduced me to Trevor, called Trev by the guys; Erik, nicknamed Erika; Mindy, whom they called Betty, and lastly, Ella, better known as Bunny. I heard words like bro, brosef and brosiah – all three of which I am pretty sure mean the same thing. Trev asked Ari how Andy was and referred to Andy as a “grey.”
They talked for a while, using their specialized vocabulary, and then Ari, with Bunny’s help, found the perfect board for Lauren. It was a BIC Sport Wahine something or other. White, with a purple streak down the middle. Ari kept trying to talk me into letting him buy me one too, but I vehemently refused. The staff was friendly and all of them came out from the back room to say goodbye. Ari did another series of weird handshakes and we were on our way.
As we left the shop, I turned to him.
“What’s a grey?” I wanted to know.
“An older surfer.”
“What’s a gaper?”
Ari chuckled a bit to himself and ran his hand through his hair again.
“It’s someone who watches surfers but has never been in the water.”
“Oh.”
“I can’t believe I married someone who doesn’t like to get in the water. We have a pool and a hot tub, and we live on the beach -- all of which is of no use to us.”
“You can get into whatever water you want whenever you want. It’s not as though you’re starved for company.”
“Yeah, but I only want to play with you,” he frowned.
“Well, we’ll just have to find other things to do in our spare time,” I suggested with a wink.
“Ok,” a sly smile replaced the frown on his face, “but I wouldn’t mind combining the two one day.”
I tsked at him and rolled my eyes.
The shopping trip had one other interesting aspect. Because of the fact that I was kidnapped by a seriously wanted man by the FBI and that I am the only heiress to baio, my grandmother’s wildly successful clothing company, Ari’s and my face had been plastered all over the news, in papers and in magazines and people recognized us wherever we went. Most people smiled and offered a few words of encouragement. In the few instances when someone got a little too personal or encroached upon my delicate space bubble, Ari was right there to usher the intruder away. A couple of times, I saw people snapping photos with their cell phones or cameras and it made me feel uneasy and a bit angry. I could tell that Ari was mad about the photo situation, too but he tried hard not to show it.
We packed up Ari’s Rover with Lauren’s gifts and then walked down the road to a small restaurant on the corner. We ate dinner together at a private, outside table, talked, held hands and watched as dark storm clouds rolled in off the sea. After our meal, the wind began to pick up and shortly after, the sky opened up and rain began to pour down from the heavens. We ran to Ari’s car and laughed as we slammed the car doors. Ari’s shook his wet hair out causing droplets to splatter his leather seats.
His smile faded, “This is all going to blow over, you know- people wanting to talk to you and take your photo.”
I nodded. “You’re right. It’ll be fine. We just need to give this situation some time.”
“I shouldn’t have brought you out with me today. I wasn’t thinking.”
“I wanted to come, Ari. I want to be normal with you.”
Ari let out a breath between his cheeks. “We will never be normal, Ava.”
I frowned. Ari changed the subject quickly to the weather and the fact that the storm would make for some decent waves the next day.
He pulled his car into the garage and began to unload the gifts while I went to hunt down ribbons and wrapping paper. I was still new to the house and since I never packed or unpacked a single item, finding the ribbon drawer was a bit of a challenge. After ten minutes of diligent hunting, I broke down and phoned Aggie who directed me to a downstairs utility room. A room I did not know existed in my own home, or maybe I did but I just couldn’t remember. I found it off the den and was more than happy to see that the space was full of all the gift-wrapping essentials along with tools, cleaning supplies and all sorts of random, useful items. It was a do-it-yourselfers dream closet.
I walked back up to the main living room with my paper, ribbons, scissors and tape in hand. Ari put a Beck album on the whole-house sound system and we got to work on the living room floor, wrapping everything up in shades of purple. When Beck’s version of “Pink Moon” came on, Ari grabbed my hand, bringing me to my feet, and the two of us danced together, barefoot in our living room. He sang along with the music while the thunder crashed outside. I felt unbelievably safe in his arms and pushed myself closer to his chest.
“I never should have let you leave me that day.” Ari held me tighter in his arms. He kissed my hair. “I will never be able to forgive myself for what happened to you.”
Chapter 5
Swimming Lesson
The next morning, we went next door to Ari’s parent’s house, the sun was shining brightly and the air was nice and warm. Ari unloaded all of the gifts for Lauren’s birthday in a pile in Aggie’s kitchen. Lauren’s eyes grew wide when she saw the surfboard with a great big purple ribbon wrapped around it.
“Oh, my gosh,” she squealed. “Please tell me that’s mine!”
“Happy birthday!” Ari laughed and Lauren ran across the kitchen and threw her arms around him.
“Thank you so much; I love it! Can we please go out today? Please?”
Ari scratched the back of his head, “Uhh, I don’t know, Lauren.” He looked over at me questioningly and I could tell he was torn about leaving my side. Sheer disappointment showed on Lauren’s face.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Ari; of course you’ll go,” I spoke up before he could make any excuses.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, absolutely. I’ll be out in a little bit to sit on the
beach and fulfill my role as a gaper.”
He stared at me for a minute in thought, “are you sure?” he asked again.
“She said yes, now let’s go!” Lauren whined before I could respond.
I smiled and Ari kissed me softly and left to get his board.
Sitting down at the kitchen island, I watched Aggie make Lauren’s birthday cake. The house cleared out quickly as soon as the others found out that Ari and Lauren were going surfing. Even Andy joined in on their fun.
“So, Ava,” Aggie started. “Were you able to find the ‘ribbon drawer?” She smiled a huge smile.
“Yes. That closet’s a bit over the top don’t you think?”
“Only a bit. Didn’t Ari show you around your own home?”
I frowned. “Yes, Aggie he did. I just don’t remember everything.”
“Oh.” Aggie’s face fell and her shoulders dropped. “Right, Ava, I am sorry, Baby.”
“It is totally fine, Aggie. No worries; it was just a silly room - I forgot it was there. No big deal.”
She turned serious.
“How is everything? How are you feeling?”
“I feel okay,” I answered. I didn’t want to go into detail or mention anything about the glasses of water, and I am sure she understood.
“Are you sure? Ari told me about yesterday and some of the people snapping pictures of you.”
“Yeah.” I tried to brush her off.
“That will blow over; just lay low for a bit.”
“Yeah, yeah. You are right. I will.”
She could tell I didn’t feel like talking any further on the subject of my kidnapping or of the aftermath.
“We haven’t really talked since the wedding... how is married life?”
Grinning, I fidgeted with my ring. “Good.”
“Oh, come on!” Aggie laughed as she threw her dishtowel down on the counter.
“Is that all you’re going to give me? ‘Good?” She mocked. “You know I want details.”