All the Waters of the Earth (Giving You ... #3)

by Leslie McAdam

  I could live with that amount.

  Ugh.

  The legal test was the best interest of the child. But that was also how I should act. What would be best for Rob? Not what was best for me. What was best for me was to never see Carlos again as long as I lived. But while Carlos was an asshole to me, and he’d been stupid in Vegas, he’d never hurt Rob. Actually, I think the hurt that he’d done had been through abandonment, not through attention. If Rob spent more time with him, well, maybe that would be healthy.

  Fuck.

  Fine.

  “Okay,” I said.

  He did a double take. “Okay?”

  “Temporarily, okay. I want your paycheck still docked. I want all the hearings to go away. I want Rob to tell me all the wonderful things you do with him, because I’ll ask. We’ll try it this month. And we’ll take it one month at a time. Do. Not. Fuck. Up. Your. Son.”

  He looked down at the ground. “I don’t think that I can fuck him up, Lucy, because you’ve been his mother. No matter what I’ve done, he’ll always have you.”

  What?

  Something nice out of Carlos’s mouth. True, he wanted something out of me, but for now, I was going to take it.

  Like the evidence that I was building with Jake, one day at a time, building a relationship, I’d give Carlos that chance too. One day at a time, he could build a relationship with his son. And I was going to be vigilant to make sure that he really was doing that. But if he did, I think it was in Rob’s best interest to have a relationship with his dad.

  I nodded at Carlos. “We’re done here. The attorneys can write it up.” And I left, going back to Amelia.

  When I left, later, after signing the papers, somehow, I felt lighter.

  Reaching up, I cradled his shoulder blade with my curved hand. It jutted out at an angle, covered in soft skin and muscle, and I yet again appreciated the strength of his upper body. From this position, as he looked me in the eyes, one arm hooked around my neck, the other arm holding him up over me, hand next to my ear, I enjoyed the sensation of his body against mine, the way his torso felt over me. Warm. Solid. Comforting. I slowly ran my hand from his shoulder blade all the way down his side. The edge of his torso spread wider than my hand, even though he was a lean guy, so I took my time and explored. Again, stroking his skin, no clothes on, noticing the way it felt to run my hand all the way down him, slowly, from just under his arm to his hip, reveling in being able to touch him, uninhibited. I pressed my hand into his gorgeous flesh, feeling his muscles, holding him to me.

  Rob had spent the night at Carlos’s house. Jake and I got naked and stayed that way. And now, his hard cock filled me and he gently moved inside me. My twelve-weeks-pregnant belly rounded slightly, meeting his trim waist.

  He closed his eyes, and I watched the look of agonizing pleasure come over his face, as he slid out and in, out and in, and then he opened them again and brushed his soft lips against mine. He’d already made sure that I’d come. Three times. It was his turn.

  “Do it,” I whispered.

  He nodded and kissed me again, this time wilder, wetter, more passionate, and he changed the angle that he was thrusting.

  My breathing got heavy, because God that felt good.

  “Come, lover, do it,” I whispered, and with a shudder and a quiet groan, he climaxed, for a moment out of control, out of the world of cell phones and time and into a world where only he and I existed.

  And then he collapsed onto me, lips against my neck, his thick hair all that I could feel of his head, and stayed there.

  A moment later, he hoisted himself up, pulled back and pulled out, and went back on his knees, so that he could kiss my belly. Staying there for a moment, running his hand lightly around my navel, he rubbed his nose on my skin and then peppered it with kisses. Then he came up behind me, my back to his front, and he drew me in his arms, spooning, kissing my neck.

  “We need to tell people,” he said against my neck. “Your belly is starting to show.”

  “Okay,” I agreed. “Rob first.”

  “Yeah,” he whispered. “Definitely first.”

  We lay there for a moment and he spoke again. “What do you want to do about us?”

  I shrugged. “I want to be with you.”

  “I am with you,” he answered. “But don’t you want more than that?” I could feel the pulse racing in his body. His breath got shallower and his voice was huskier than normal.

  I started to shrug again, and then changed my mind. Nodding, I said, “Yeah, I do.”

  Because I did. I wanted to be with him forever. Yes, this pregnancy was unplanned, and yes, we were still in a new relationship, but it wasn’t so new anymore, and with each day I spent with him, I fell in love with him deeper and deeper. I’d never felt this way about anyone before. I had no idea how I’d been able to write romance novels without experiencing the way he made me feel—like I was a precious treasure that he had to care for. Bringing me presents, spending time with me, and making sure that I had what I needed. He never missed a doctor’s appointment. The workaholic in him was winding down. It wasn’t a linear slow down, but he wasn’t working anywhere near what he used to. We were talking about what he was going to do to transition even more from the craziness that he had hid himself in for so long. Soon. He was changing, and he told me that he planned on making a bigger change, once he figured it out what it would be.

  And the way he was with Rob made me fall for him even more. He listened to Rob chatter and went to the effort to make sure to read the same books that Rob was reading so that they could talk about them.

  I was sure.

  “Do you want to marry me, Lucy? Before the baby gets here?” I turned over and looked at him. He looked completely sincere and a little scared. I felt my heart race, and I was just as scared as he was. “I love you,” he continued, “and I want to make sure that you know that.”

  “I do know that,” I whispered.

  This wasn’t the first time that we had talked about it. It wasn’t the first time that I had thought about it. But it was the first time when I knew, I just knew, that I wanted to make our relationship formal and show the world. We were together.

  “So will you marry me?” he asked again.

  And I lost it. Pregnancy hormones. The release of good sex. Being secure in his arms and knowing that this not-perfect, but real guy wanted me. Yes. I wanted it forever.

  “Yes,” I whispered, a tear coming down my cheek. “I will.”

  “You will?” he said, sounding shocked.

  “I will,” I laughed, and he wrapped his arms around me and held me tight as I sobbed into his neck. “We’ll tell Rob all of it at once.” And then I paused and breathed and said in a rush, “Oh my God, we’re getting married.”

  He laughed and kissed me, then turned me over on my back and started kissing me down my neck, down my breasts, down to my belly. “Wipe away those tears, honey, we’re getting married. Go get a dress.” And he climbed off of the bed, went to his jacket, and pulled out a small box. “I got you a ring,” he said shyly, and pulled it out.

  It was a square cut diamond, big, with two blue sapphires on either side. Like his eyes.

  My stomach dropped. Not a far journey.

  “If you don’t like it, I can return it and we can get a different one. I just thought that it reminded me of you and me and Rob, with the three stones. And the ring is our new baby, holding us all together.” He climbed back on to the bed and pulled me up to sit next to him, and gently took my hand.

  I let him slide the ring on.

  It fit. I’d never worn a ring there.

  It was too much. Too beautiful. Overwhelming.

  But I opened up and decided to let it in. The good. The amazing. The wonderful.

  “I love it and I love you.”

  He looked giddy with relief. “Is it too soon to get married this week? I can make an appointment with a judge I know. Or we can go to church, whatever you want.”

  “Judg
e. Maybe after the baby comes, we’ll do something bigger.”

  He nodded and kissed me.

  I took a deep breath and thought about what had just happened. And mixed with the excitement, I felt an even bigger peace than I’d felt in my whole life.

  The End.

  Delete.

  Ugh.

  I rapped my fingers on my desk.

  Was I done? I never really liked to write “The End” on my stories, because in my mind, they were never done. There was always something else that the characters could do. My characters took on a life of their own, and I never liked to say goodbye.

  I thought about it for a moment.

  Yeah. I had finished my new novel. On deadline. And I was pleased with it. I started typing again.

  The End.

  Time to finalize and send it off to my editor.

  After the birth of this creative project, I felt relieved and sated. But there were other things that I needed to do.

  Like tell Rob that he was getting a new sibling.

  And a stepdad.

  I got up from my desk, my body achy from pregnancy, rubbing my fingers on my gently protruding belly. Having made it through the first trimester, I couldn’t wear my fitted clothes anymore. Since I normally wore yoga pants to write in, so far I’d been able to hide my condition, but it was at the point where I needed to tell everyone. I’d managed to hide it from my friends and family by saying that I couldn’t go out since I needed to finish my book. But now that it was done, I needed to show my face and start telling people. It was time to tell Rob about the baby.

  I also needed to tell him about Jake and me.

  Wandering down the hall, I walked into his room. It was the sweet spot of time after he’d arrived home from school and had finished his homework, but before dinner. I knocked on his open door to politely announce my presence. Rob sat inside, reading a book, his skinny frame draped with a t-shirt that hung from his frame, ankles hanging out the bottom of his pants.

  Yes, that was my son, nose in a book.

  “Can I talk with you?”

  “Okay.” He reluctantly set the book down.

  Again, that was my son.

  “I have a few things to tell you and they’re important.” His dark eyes got big, and I took a deep breath and continued. “First of all, you need to know that I love you, and I have always loved you, and I always will love you.”

  He looked at me suspiciously and said, “Yeah?”

  “What do you think of Mister Jake?”

  “I like him.”

  “Me too, mijo. Me too. He is very special to me. In a different way than you are special to me.”

  “Are you going to marry him, Mom?”

  Smart kid. It didn’t surprise me that he’d figured it out. Kids know.

  “Yes,” I answered. “I am.”

  “Does that mean we’re gonna live at his house?”

  “Yeah, it does.”

  “Do I have to switch schools?”

  “No. I checked it out. You don’t.” He visibly relaxed. “What do you think, mijo?”

  “Okay, I guess.” He shrugged his narrow shoulders.

  I gave him a smile. “There’s more news.” Looking back up at me blankly, he set his hand on his book in a comforting gesture. “There’s going to be a new brother or sister.”

  “Yeah, Dad already told me.”

  This surprised me. “He told you he was having one?”

  He nodded. “He says it’s a girl.” Rob grimaced. “Great, a sister. Guess that will be okay, though.”

  “Roberto, I’m pregnant too,” I said quietly.

  My son’s lower lip started to quiver and he visibly grayed under his tan skin. “No. No. You can’t.”

  “What? Why?” I asked before I could help myself. Then I recovered. “Tell me what you’re thinking, mijo.” He shook his head and a tear stuck at the corner of his eye. I reached over and held him in a big hug, which he didn’t return, his arms held limply down. “C’mere,” I muttered into his hair. “Just because we have big changes coming up doesn’t mean that my love for you will change.” He nodded into my torso. “Are you scared that the baby is going to get all of the attention?”

  “Both babies,” he whispered.

  “You’re a smart kid,” I said. “To figure out how you feel and to tell me. Babies do take a lot of time and things will change.”

  I leaned back so I could study his face and watched the tear threaten to escape his tear duct. But he wiped it away with the back of his hand.

  “It’s a big change,” I repeated. “I am scared too. And it surprised me too.”

  “It did?”

  “Yeah. But it’s a good surprise. It just takes some getting used to.” I pulled him back to me in a hug.

  Rob nodded, and I continued, “Just think about it, mijo. Jake and I are going to get married by a judge next week.”

  “Okay. Can I read my book now?”

  “Yeah.” And I ruffled his hair.

  Just then I heard the front door open. Jake was home. He knew that I was going to tell Rob today and he’d wanted to know if he should be there or not. I’d told him that I wanted to tell Rob by myself and he’d stayed away, even though he was in the habit of coming home earlier these days. I got up and kissed his forehead. “We can talk about it more if you want, okay?”

  He nodded.

  Pausing a moment at the door to look at him, I steadied myself. I hadn’t realized it, but my pulse had been racing the whole time and I’d felt flushed—not from the pregnancy. I’d been nervous to tell him. Things were going to change, and I was scared, too.

  It was hard to be a parent when you wanted someone to hold onto yourself. I leaned my head against the door and heard Jake call out, “Lucy?” Some of the fear evaporated when I heard his baritone.

  Righting myself, I went to the front door and got a kiss on the mouth and then a Jake kiss on my nose. “What’s up? How was your day?”

  Wrapping his arms around me, he lifted my chin and looked at me intently. He was my someone to hold onto. “How did it go telling Rob?”

  “He needs to get used to it. But good.”

  He nodded and his eyes were dancing. I wondered why. “I’m glad you told him. Keeping secrets is stressful. It’s a relief now.” He paused. “Still gonna be an adjustment for us all.”

  “Yeah it is, but now we can tell everyone else.” Like my parents. And my friends. The same feeling that I’d felt when I told Rob returned. I wasn’t done with my uncomfortable announcements by a long run.

  Then Jake spoke. “And I’ve got some more news.”

  “We had a meeting at work.”

  His eyes seemed to get deeper, a blue that was almost black. He looked like a kid dying to tell the answer in class, but who knew that he had to wait until he was called on. Well, a kid in a dark gray business suit with a blue and silver striped tie.

  “What? Tell me.” I gasped.

  “A few things,” he said, teasing me, making me wait. I put my hand on my hip in my classic sassy-Lucy posture. “We voted to make Amelia Crowley a partner in my law firm.”

  I squealed. “That’s great! She totally deserves the promotion.”

  “She does. She’s already taken over most of my cases. She put in her time. She’s due.”

  I did a little dance, shaking my booty. Amelia, breaking the glass ceiling. He watched me dance until I stopped moving, and then I smiled saucily up at him. But I thought of something.

  “She’s not going to work too hard is she?” I asked, suddenly worried about my lawyer.

  “No. We hired another young attorney, a woman, to help her.”

  Excellent.

  “There’s more,” he continued, eyes still dancing.

  I pushed his chest. Oh, yum, his chest. “Oh yeah? Hit me with it.”

  He leaned over and got right in my face, a beaming smile on his marvelous one. I almost expected him to do a happy booty dance. Heck, I wanted to see that. “I have a new
job.”

  Awesome!

  “What? Where?”

  He wrapped his hands around my waist, pulling me to him. “The court has a program for helping people who don’t have attorneys and a staff position opened up. It’s got limited hours—ten to four—and I’ll be helping people directly. People who can’t afford lawyers.”

  “That’s fantastic!”

  “It’s a pay cut but I have money saved. I think we’ll be fine.”

  I squealed again and jumped up and wrapped my arms around his neck. He swung me around, as jubilant as I was.

  “I’m gonna have time, Lucy honey. Time for you, for Rob, for our baby.” He paused. “Time to paint.”

  “Yay,” I whispered, and he kissed me again, this time pressing me against the wall, his legs between mine, caging me in with one arm on the wall next to me and the other one on my ass, pulling my leg up.

  When we broke apart, I wasn’t breathing.

  “That’s too hot for right now,” I said, whispering again.

  “It’s a promise for later,” he replied, whispering back.

  Just then Rob came out of his room, thankfully when we weren’t entangled, and we set to work making dinner.

  The next week, on Friday morning, Sara and Georgie sat on my bed, watching me dress.

  “I still can’t believe you didn’t tell us you were pregnant,” Georgie charged, a sassy-Lucy hand on her hip.

  “I told you I was sorry, chica, but I needed to get things squared away with Jake before I could tell anyone. And then I wanted to get through the first trimester.”

  “But we could have helped you,” Sara said sensibly.

  I kissed the top of her hair. “You’re helping me now.”

  My parents camped out in the living room with Rob, who I’d taken out of school for the day. My son had his hair slicked down, slacks and a dress shirt on, and his shoes shined. He looked sharp. Jake had already left for the Santa Barbara courthouse, bringing his dad with him. His mother, stepdad, brother, and sister were going to meet us there.

  I slipped on my dress. It was a bigger size than usual, but still fitted, strapless, knee length, and very me. Simple. Elegant. And white. Sara zipped me up the back and fastened the buttons.